I don't know if any of you here experienced parental abuse, but lately it's tearing my life apart and I can't seem to find help anywhere.
Okay so I'll start by saying I'm 19 and leaving off to Uni in 4 months. The problem is my dad can't seem to realise I am leaving to be independent, and doesn't understand me wanting to leave my spot. A bit of a backstory; My dad is quite old and oldfashioned, he grew up on a farm and I go there regulary to work. I've always been good at sports, and when I didn't do well he would mentally destroy me, I mean telling me to kill myself, threating to kill me etc. Now I am scared to tell him I want to quit so I can focus on school but I am afraid he is going to beat me so much that I wouldn't be able to walk. He has hit me in the past oveer minor stuff so it would be possible.
I have no benefits from this sport anymore and I recently had an injury that didn't allow me to train even if i wanted to, but he expects I am in good form, so I can't even go to competitions because if I come home with a bad result, I'll get it for sure.
Any help? please I'm really desperate.
I don't know if any of you here experienced parental abuse...
Suicide
Thought bout it, so I might do it after all
Wall of text: Typical redditor trying to pretend he's not a redditor.
Sorry, I really didn't pay attention
Just do your study where you're somewhat visible, assuming he knows that you wanna go to (uni?) you should be fine.
Beat the shit out of that old bastard
Move away, tell him goodbye, thanks for your life but he and you probably won't see each other again.
Best of luck user.
Yeah the school system is a bit different from where I from.
But he still expects I shouldbe ready for contests, it's fucking me up
If he tries to hit me and/or actually hits me
I wont hesitate to punch the motherfucker
Tell him fuck himself
I will surely do that, but first I have to survive
these 4 months, thanks anyway
Who cares
Tell him:
>Go fuck yourself, nazi
Start working out and become a bodybuilder
How would that benefit my situation if I want to quit training?
If you're Implying I should get tough to protect myself, I already am, but he is my dad after all and all that shit
He's your dad, not your friend or confident, he's the 50% of your genetic makeup, nothing more, nothing less - and if he's a violent idiot, he certainly doesn't deserve your company nor your respect.
So if he tries to hit you again, punch him in the face repeatedly. You really need to get out of there man - can't you bunk somewhere until UNI?
I could try to go and live with my sister in another city, but that's just an option she doesn't really knoow about
Give her a call?
Best of luck, user.
Fuck man. I'd say gtfo, live with sis if you can. 4 months is doable. After that, fuck him. Beating you up for something as insignificant as sport is just... Unintelligent and psycho.
couple of paths you can go down.
the two most obvious are either:
1) keep trying to talk to him until he breaks
2) cut off communication and move on with your life
i would suggest talking to a therapist, a psychologist. i did when i was in college. it was free at the clinic on campus. i went twice a month, for about an hour.
it's a person that you can talk to about shit, and they won't use it against you as leverage. if you talk to your family, or siblings, or girlfriend, or friends, or even random people, they're not going to give you real good advice. plus they might end up thinking about you differently for the rest of your life, so you'll hold back what you talk to them about. you get this echo chamber in your head and you never get to really think through it since you have to do it on your own.
not so with a therapist. you can tell them anything, (within reason. they'll call the cops if you say you're going to shoot someone). if they act differently, you just quit going and you never see them again in your life. it's great. i got a ton of value out of it.
You're 19. You're pretty much full grown. If you, in the prime of your life, freshly polished from sports can't defend yourself from a mean old bastard, then you've got bigger problems.
buy a baseball bat and beat the fuck outta him. then leave. or record it and call the police.
Assuming that you're willing to show evidence of the abuse toward you and you're willing to testify that your father is a serial abuser, you should contact the proper authorities and ship his ass to prison.
If that's not the route you want to take (family situations are complex) then seek refuge in a shelter, run away until you can stay at uni, and get a restraining order. Nothing good will come of violence in the long term, the only term that really matters on an individual level.
Or you can kill him if you want. Dont wait for him to kill you first.
My dad used to whip my legs and ass with a doubled up leather belt
Never hurt me none you softcock faggot snowflakes
Harden up
This cocksucker is far removed from the respect of his father and he wants to go live on his own on a gay city adventure like that. Probably to remove the taste of his father's balls with nigger nuts
Got any wins of your sister?
Call cops and live in shelters
Fuck that. Once he brought violence into the equation, he forfeited any quarter by you. Get a roll of quarters, he gets violent, you go at him with no mercy and put his ass in the hospital or end him.
You. Defend. Yourself.
I was 15 when I knocked mine out. I lost all restraint. When he came at me I charged harder and hit him with a brutal head butt to his face and then an elbow to his jaw fracturing it. No mercy. Just fast effective brutality. Don't even worry about winning or losing or getting hurt.
The bullshit ends when YOU end it.
Carry 3-4 coins in a cloth bag, keep it in your pocket. When you have a chance alone, knock him over and beat him silly. Don't just use the coinbag, it'll hurt more than it damages. When he cant fight back, humiliate him. Take his pants off and piss on him. When you're done, get him to say that you scare him, that you are in charge, and he's a little bitch faggot. If he refuses, remove all but one coin from the bag and hit him more. When you get the results you need, return to normal and don't bring it up again. Life is as it always was except you can achieve what you want without his input.
If he starts acting out again repeat the process, but keep his mouth open when you pee. Did this with my own dad and things worked out ok.
the most important thing you must seek for now is financial independence
after that you can say fuck all
Be strong.
Stay strong.
Live your life.
You don't need anyone but yourself.
Fly the coop, friend.
Be free.
not op) i am impressed
sounds like you've got 4 months left of keeping your ass lubed and your lips moist
The general consensus of the thread is to take action. The action you choose to take is your decision, ultimately, but if you continue to do nothing like you have for years you will continue to suffer.
I would advise against violence, the courts will never support it and it's much easier to make the system work for you in your case. Just because you're not a minor anymore doesn't mean your rights are diminished, in fact they are bolstered.
Abuse victims are like sharks, they die if they don't keep moving forward.
The world is a cold place, listen to your father.
Almost quints
Reroll
Beat the shit out of him. I mean really fucking beat him. Beat him with a hammer until he can't defend himself anymore. Make him think you are going to kill him. Hold that thing over his head ready to smash his fucking brains in,. Make him feel that fear of god. Then tell him you are quitting sports.
just kill him if he attacks you, problem solved. it'll be justified. He goes to punch you, whip out a knife and sink it into his guts, then yank it upwards as high as you can. Look the bastard in the eyes and watch him squirm in agony.