I have been in a coma since December 31, 1999. what have i missed

You missed me raping the daughter you had (with a woman who raped you while you were in your coma).

The daughter is pregnant.

Yea Forums was created

Look up the new ghostbusters, that should do the rest

aw fuck i wish i didnt wake up
i can see that
cool
also cool

Why were you in a coma?

larp

from what i can remember, it had something to do with a high school drinking party for new years eve and y2k stuff. blunt force trauma caused me to blackout and go into a coma. whats sad is that im almost 38 and ive missed the better parts
of my life

what does that mean?

Also I‘ve heard the new starwars is pretty dope.

i saw episode 1, but not the newer ones

As I said, you didn‘t really miss out
Sure, the whole al quaeda and isis stuff was kinda weird, plus there were some shootings, but other than that..? Not much.
Steve Jobs died of ligma though :(

You should watch the animated movies.
And when you‘re done, try ‚firefly‘ the whole series is pretty fucking dope. Especially season two and three

That's awful. I'm sorry you had to go through that, if true. Who has been tending to your needs?
Why did you share this here?

"al quaeda" holy shit look at all those vowels
"steve jobs died of ligma" i've heard this joke before

Yeah, but when you say it, it sounds like coughing up phlegm. Arabic is such a beautiful language.

>be in coma since '99
>wake up and decide to post about it on a website created in '03
Interdasting

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Ligma balls
Hahahahahaha gotteeeem

Nyetowič

my nurse had been tending my needs until a couple years ago (this is kind of what the hospital said to me when i woke up), since about 2015 ive been treated by the hospital. my family was going to pull the plug in '04 apparently, but they kept going for whatever reason. i shared this here because i didn't know where else to post to, and the websites i wanted to post to were all shut down.

the twin towers collapsed and a sect in the government blamed it on muslim terrorists so they could go to war for close to 20 years while Russia and China slowly gained power.

technology ramped up and now everyone pretty much has a cell phone.

economy has been stagnating and on the verge of collapse since 2008.

gay culture went mainstream and now they are pushing pedophilia and child exploitation as trendy and cool.

western world is being overrun with third world "migrant" invaders.

and no one can do a thing to stop it.

How different is your family from what you remember?

is this how you expected the future to be?

>No new posts
this

currently there is 38 genders, if you don't choose one by the time your driver license renewal is due one will be assigned to you

this

of course, everyone is older. my lil sis was 5 when i went into the coma, now she's graduated college and has a kid. my big bro was 19, now he's pushing 40 and has 3 kids. my other sis was pregnant at the time, now her kid is 19 and lives in her basement playing video games

This
>this
>

What language is that and what does it mean?
I tried google but got nothing and I don't know how to put the tilde-type thing over the c.

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did you reconnect with any old friends?

weird
nope. i thought the world was going to be like the 90's for at least a couple more years, now im looking back on the past 20 years and it looks like everybody is fighting and killing each other. sucks man
thats wack yo

It‘s a play on nyet and the stupid way everything in slavic languages sounds like it ends with -ič in the end. Especially surnames.
>nyetowič

only one. my family told my friend Mack that i woke up, and he flew from California almost instantly to meet me. we all went out to eat and had fun

We have a carret for a president (Danld Tramp) who runs the country like a business, and the far left is going on the offensive.

Thanks, user

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How did you found about this cursed site?
Also, have you had problems adjusting to the way society has evolved?

Sure thing bro

somebody told me about Yea Forums while i was out to eat with family. i haven't gotten to used to society as of yet, because everything is powered with the Inter Net. everybody seems more liberal and feminine, even the males. (I'm in Spokane, so maybe that explains it.) However, there are a lot of pot stores here. When was it legalized?

they went down dude

did legitly go into a coma and just now went on Yea Forums to tell us that uh this is must be a joke

if your from cali then ya its been legalized

first time on this website fren?

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Also did you know that there's new music now

I'm in Washington state

sorta been here for like 3-5 months now knew about this site in the past and the shit Yea Forums was infamous for now its just a porn board

The country is more divided than ever (barring civil war), People are getting arrested for jokes in the UK, 13%

aw dude I think its legal there

Mary Ham killed Gloria Borger
Also Melissa McCarthy is the best

Really? Wowzers dude

gay people have rights now

Radical dude

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>has been in a coma since 99
>knows Yea Forums
Sure

Just go back to sleep man. You don't even wanna know.

He ran as a republican and beat Bill's wife. No it wasn't Monica

thats what I was thinking ?

b has always been this way dood