Can polyamorous relationships work? Is it a blessing or a curse?

Can polyamorous relationships work? Is it a blessing or a curse?

If you have a story share it

Attached: 10-youtube-drama-feed-c.w1200.h630.jpg (1200x630, 194K)

OP bump, I have had exactly one relationship that was "open," and it didn't end well at all

On the plus side I was able to get out of a relationship with someone who was extremely manipulative guilt-free, on the downside the whole thing erupted and I lost two close friends who I never talk to now

I've not been in a polyamorous relationship, but I have studied them in psychology.

Honestly, all relationships have their difficulties, monogamy is hard too, but poly relationships have specific issues with jealousy, feelings of being left out, people will struggle to love both partners equally & that creates feelings of resentment, they can negatively effect commitment, one person will often be pushed out in favour of monogamy, one party may stop being involved sexually, if they all live together it can create housing issues, marriage is impossible, legal issues too as they aren't recognised, who money goes to when one party dies becomes a huge legal conflict, alienation from monogamous couples & people.

On the positive side though, bi people get to have their cake & eat it too, threesomes can be pretty dope if you're dating two people of the opposite sex, then again, what happens when it comes to children, who gets to be the birth mother? the second mother will possibly experience depression as a result.

Everyone is different though, some people have little to no jealousy, so, yeah, there is no real answer to your question, tl;dr life is always a bitch.

Imagine if you are with 2 women. Both get pregnant and one miscarries

Absolutely not. Any non monogamous relation ship will collapse.

Maybe there are lots of poly people out there who are not public because of the stigma, for my sake I think that it's at least very difficult to work, but maybe it's a very successful relationship structure in data that I can't see
From outside looking in it looks volatile AF, and hard to contain jealousy and maintain trust

But that conclusion is with very minimal, anecdotal evidence and wouldn't be regarded as a universal conclusion at all

one of my coworkers is in a poly relationship with our supervisor and his wife. absolutely insufferable nitwits. all of them. every goddamn conversation has to be injected with insight into how poly and progressive they are. i wish a drunk driver would do the world a favor and take them out.

My mom and her husband have been polyamorous for their entire 13-year marriage with no end in sight
Mom's had another boyfriend for the past 2 or 3 years while husband mostly just sleeps with other women without really committing
I'm not poly, but I can't not believe it's at least as viable as monogomy simply because I've seen it work

My mom once said that jealousy stems from insecurity, and if all parties involved are truly comfortable and fulfilled with their roles then it won't be an issue

This is interesting, first person to really speak up for poly as working well
It seems it may take a certain type of person and not everyone is eligible

Yea they can work. 20% of the males should have 80% of the females.

Male polydom here.

Yes, on the same condition a monogamous relationship would succeed: You all share and paint your future-stories together.

When that communal binding conversation is gone then the relationship is dead.

I did poly for close to a year, dating two other girls while my "main" girlfriend dated one other guy

It fucking sucked and I hated it. Every time she was out with the other dude, it would put me in a bad mood, and she started resenting me because I didn't want to be friends with the dude.

My two other girls were poly; one decided she liked me enough that she wanted to be mono and started applying pressure for me to date only her, the other lived with her primary bf and his primary gf and while their situation was the closest to funcitonal poly as I've seen, she would still often complain about feeling neglected or unfulfilled by her main partner.

It sucks and it's not worth it. Only do it if you're with people you don't actually care about.

Poly is what people do when they're happy enough with a partner that they don't want to break up with them and lose a consistent source of emotional support and sex, but also don't like their partner enough to want to commit to them, and I stead are trying to keep their options open.

Poly's will try to deny this, and there's expections to any rule, but I can guarantee from experience it's true 90+% of the time.

Dude, learn to control your women. If you are the central reason they all know you then you are what they are dancing around.

Push them hard so they become what you want and need, because obviously you already were. Those worth more than one partner should set a standard for all.

I'm not in a poly relationship, but I have been in a super open one for 6 years now.

Emotionally we are committed only to one another, but sexually basically anything goes.
So far my GF only ever "used" this agreement to get fingered once.
I on the other hand am quite a bit more active and have girls or guys over every now and then.

So far this works incredibly well. It's actually really funny to see a how many of the mono-couples around us envy our lifestyle.
I've got a couple of funny mono-couple meets open-relationship-couple stories, if anyone's interested.

Sure go ahead please

Yes. And from what I've been able to tell (from many of my Mom's other poly friends), that type of person tends to be someone who is sure of both who they are and what they want i.e. grown adults and usually not teens or 20-somethings

*brofist of divine poly-justice*

The generation of polyparenting is coming so the mature version for teenagers will come soon.

Would it continue to work as well if your gf started to consistently have another guy over? Say, once or twice a week she starts having the same guy over? What if she started fucking him more often than she did you?
Is your opinion of it "working incredibly well" contingent on the fact that it's currently incredibly one-sided? Because it seems that way, just a tad

It can work, but I would say that it can only be viable long term (and as a family forming thing) if it is closed. Polyamorous does not imply open relationship. Also I would say that small configurations are more stable. Same goes for configurations that would reduce parental uncertainty for our pre-civilization ape brains. That means...poly wont work for cucks. It will only work for chads with harems.

Enjoy your ever decreasing power for your clan. Open poly relationships are cancer and is not useful for your domain.

Isn't one-sided if his partner doesn't utilize that dimension of experience in her life.

If the only value you have with a partner is sex then yes if someone prioritizes them over you it causes conflict. Be able to do more with your poly-partner than simply physically fuck them.

Poly with cucks are hive queens. Not that complicated. Why y'all forget women do this too?

>Observation school

You didn't answer the question.

I'm asking you, if she DID start to "utilize that dimension of experience", would that change you feelings about it.

And I'm not saying sex is the only thing that is valuable in a partner. But I'm asking, if your partner started perceiving more value in sex with someone else than you, would that affect you at all?

The fact you chose to immediately highlight that you sleep around more than she does, followed by your moving of the goalposts instead of answering my question, makes me feel like it would.

I am not forgetting anything. I am saying that hive queen configurations are less stable since males still viscerally crave for parental certainty, regardless of the tech we have now.

You know that the reproductive success ratio of male to female was 1 to 17 8k years ago. This means, once civilization kicks in (thanks agriculture), hypergamy reveals itself since people are able to gather status beyond their bodily limitations.

Nah. I would say that goes for open relationships and not poly necessarily. Poly relationships tend to be open more often...which is retarded imo. It is already hard, why make it harder?

I just have a couple of questions...
1. How did that hot ginger end up with an ugly piece of shit like the guy in the picture?
2. How come said ugly piece of shit, once he had his hands on said hot ginger, let her cuckold him in the first place?
3. How come said ugly piece of shit and up with the average looking brunette, then not even manage to keep fucking her after this ordeal was over?

Not trying to troll, don't give a shit about either of the people there as I only actually knew about the average looking cosplayer before this whole thing exploded--just genuinely curious.

No, it wouldn't. I'm the polydom and I've already been through the experience. I have multiple partners and over a long enough relationship knowing you are sluts that have phases of sexual partner interest means it is a positive. Sally prefers anal while Lily doesn't, or whatever.

Poly rotation is a thing because poly people love each other based around a central theme of communication.

They are stable for population with excess breeding stock that needs to not breed so we don't keep blindly adding because random unattended woman or raping man.

You are talking about demographic stability. I am talking about the stability of the relationship. Unless you gather around a bunch of aberrant males in this regard, they will crave parental certainty, which will express itself in several ways (being jelly, for example).

The last sentence is very wise and well said.
Jealousy is a big issue, but it doesn't always have to occur if everyone is truly happy from the inside

here.
I'm actually encouraging my GF to try out new things in a very kind and supportive manner. She mostly lives her sexuality through lewd photos and videos.
So yeah, if she started having someone over every now and then, I'd have absolute nothing against that.
What you have to keep in mind, is that we're really mindful of one another, which makes this thing so stable. For example, some time ago I had a girl over really often, let's call her BB. Problem was, she fell in love with me hardcore. That was something my GF didn't really like, not only out of jealousy, but because she didn't want BB to get hurt. So I talked it over with BB, we got some distance, she got over her crush and now we fuck on and off every couple of months and are good friends.

tl;dr:
I wouldn't mind if she had peeps over, as long as it's not proper emotional. Also, we're really respectful of one another, so she probably wouldn't fuck someone more than me.

That's not a poly relationship that's just an open one which is a big difference.

... why? I've never met not been that guy so you'll have to explain for me I guess. Even my own actual biological kid when it cropped up I did not care about if it is my seed or not. What prize does my semen entitle me to over a child? Why would it? Should I just baptize unclaimed children in public? That how it work?

Ok Captain Pedantry. You're wrong, but feel free to elaborate

One of my favorite stories is the "blowjob" story. Mind you, it doesn't have a great punchline or anything, as most real life stories don't. But it's an interesting insight into the weirdness an open relationship can bring.

>be me
>gf and fuckbuddy were over
>third girl (let's call her Alex) decides for a surprise visit
>she doesn't know we're in an open relationship
>fuckbuddy doesn't know that Alex doesn't know
>watching movie, covered in blankets because cold
>fuckbuddy starts rubbing my cock
>try to signal her that Alex has no idea
>doesn't work
>fuckbuddy gets below the blanket and starts blowing me
>awkard blowjob
>had to slightly lift the blanket so she got some air
>don't finish because of weird situation

couple hours later

>Alex is in kitchen with my GF
>she's super serious, close to tears
>"I think you deserve to know..." she starts explaining how sorry she is for the piece of shit I am. She explains how she saw the blowjob happen etc. etc.
>GF laughs it off, trying to explain that it's no problem
>Alex hugs her "It's gonna be alright. No need to protect that asshole."
>meanwhile I'm giggling my ass off in front of the kitchen
>Alex notices me and goes fucking balistic
>Fuckbuddy and GF have to step in
>We try to explain how we're in an open relationship.
>Fuckbuddy is really sorry for doing anything sexual infront of someone not involved, super embarassed.
>Alex storms out, calling us degenerates, screaming at us
>don't hear from Alex for a month. Blocked on all social media etc.

A month later I catch her eating out fuckbuddy. Turns out Alex was sexually super repressed by her Jehovas witness parents and was basically just jealous of us.

It can work. Pros and cons like any relationship

Why what? You not caring could be anecdotal evidence, an outlier or some form of coping mechanism. Regardless of your very modern interests, technology and ideals, your brain is still a beast of the past. A past in which parental certainty was a big fucking deal for men and civilization was not there to be blamed by social constructionist in the same way it is done today.

Also I do not understand your silly questions about prizes and shit. The only prize from an impersonal and biological standpoint is reproductive success. This impersonal and biological logic has shaped your brain and, by extension, your mind.

If you are an outlier though, make the most out of it I guess. I would still worry about clan management and fracture down the line...but maybe you think that is not your problem since you will be old or dead by then.

dont have a story

never gonna try it

That shook me more than any fucking creepy pasta, Jeebus fug!

Attached: 1549358348518.png (600x500, 98K)

you're full of shit, faggot