>Wake up at 4pm >Hear talking downstairs >Start yelling I NEED MY BIG BOY SLEEP >Waddle over to the door, knock poo-poo jar over >*whoops, guess mommy has some work to do* I knock over another just for good measure. >Waddle down the stairs to living room. Mommy is talking to a lady in a business suit about "coverage" >I NEED MY BIGBOY SLEEP >Mommy looks in my direction and apologizes to the lady. >Notice that lady has really pretty hair >Mommy tells me to go upstairs >Lady has really really pretty hair >My pee-pee goes hardy-wardy >The diaper pops off from the force of my pee-pee, leaving me naked except for my Fluttershy t-shirt >"Mommy is this the girlie-friendie I asked for?" >I can't believe that fucking bitch finally did something right. >Mommy looks really emberassed and tells me to go upstairs. The lady is really scared. >Start waddling over to the lady. >She recoils back in horror. >Keep waddling over. >I slip on the diaper around my ankles and fall to the ground. >I do a big poo poo and begin crying on the ground, but my pee-pee is still hardy-wardy at my new girlie-friendie, so I keep crawling towards her >The lady turns around and runs out the door >Mommy has tears in her eyes, tries to lift me off the ground >"Mommy, was she my girlie-friendie you got me?" >She brushes the tears off her face and nods >"Yes dear, s-she's just embarrassed. She's never seen a boy as handsome as you before!" She says as she wipes away another tear. >I smile, proud of how handsome I am >Mommy tells me that maybe if I earn enough good boy points, she will get me another girlie >She pulls me up the stairs and starts cleaning the floor >Uh-oh, my pee-pee is still hard >I get out of my bed and walk up behind mommy >Tell her she can be my girlie-friendie too >She looks kind of disgusted for some reason, says mommy can't do that >I start yelling REEEEEEEE as I rip off my diapers and shove my pee-pee at her face >She sucks my weenie-peenie to make me stop yelling
>3:00am >watching some based icarly like I usually do >also playing minecraft xbox edition >get distracted from building my poo poo pee pee themed city in creative mode by miranda cosgroves qtness >pull out my weenie and start masturbating >imagine what she looked like as a toddler while im doing this >its too much for me >realize before I finish that mommy said she is tired of cleaning up my semen from the carpet >quickly grab one of my shit jugs and cum directly into it >dont miss a drop >mommy comes in at 3:01 like she usually does to clean up my mess >"mommy look!" i exclaim while i lift the shit jug high >she looks confused, but then notices what ive done >"o-okay a-user. thats a g-good boy." she says >"what do I get mommy?" I ask while steping towards her >"a-a good boy point a-user" she says as she slowly starts to shake >I run directly into her knocking her over to get through the door >dont have time to put my weenie back into my undies >arrive at the fridge panting because it is like a whole 30 feet away >mom comes up limping with a tears on her cheeks >she reaches to the top shelf of the fridge because Im only 4'10 and cant reach >she gives me my tendies with mayonnaise just the way I like them
I stoped cumming in my shit jugs after that though. it was too much work lifting them up
>430 I’m the afternoon >Wake up after marathoning rick and morty the night before >Get up early to tug it to nick jr >Make big boy mayonnaise on my hand >Sweating like like a pro athlete after energetic jerk >Hankering for some tendies >Waddle over to gbp chart >25 points >Have enough to get a meal at McDonalds >Mumsie just got home from her second job >”Mommy your good little boy has enough points for a nuggie meal! Time for McDonald!” >”user, I just got home, can I take a nap first?” >Backhand her and explain AGAIN the agreement on the chart >Mommy grabs her keys, tears in eyes as we go get my prize >See they have mlp toys for kids meals >Fuck, spent all my points on 20 nugs >Start to reeeeeeeeeeee on the floor, until I see a girl with a twighlight sparkle toy >Run up to her and beg to trade my shirt for it >Stuck up little Stacy sloot starts to freak out and run away >Chase after her with shirt half way over head yelling for the little cumdumpster to get back here >Fucking chad dad gets up in my face about calling his sloot kid a cum dumpster skank and trying to rape her >Explain I only want my twiley toy, chad, fuck off >Get punches in face and fall to the floor >Shit myself and cry for mommy to help her good little boy >Mommy runs over, crying, apologizing to the chad, and saying I don’t know any better >”Whatever, lady, that retard has to be in his thirties! Let’s go!” >Takes his daughter and leaves, probably to fuck her gaping vag, the whore >Cry whole way home until mommy stops by Walmart and gets me a twiley plush Feels good man
haha these are great! Did you just make that up right now? wow!
Nathaniel Turner
>setting up new sento isuzu figure that arrived today >mom knocks on my door >'honey i brought you your sodies and snacks for your little playdate tonight' >have to correct the stupid bitch >'IT'S Sento mom, Isuzu Sento and she's what you would call a waifu. I know she's not real' >hands me mountain dew and pizza rolls >STUPID idiot >'i asked for mountain dew: code red' >'sweetie the gas station i stopped it didn't ha-' >'I said SPECIFICALLY CODE FUCKING RED STUPID' >tears start coming to her eyes >'user please i sta-' >'LALALALA I CAN'T HEAR YOU' >plug my fingers in my ears and begin thrashing around on my bed >she's begging me something; i don't bother to pay attention anymore >grab several of the piss jugs from the rotation >begin to pour the contents over the new shirts she got me for my birthday >screaming 'I WANT TENDIES I WANT TENDIES GIVE ME TENDIES' >she's weeping on the floor with her face buried in her hands >whip the empty bottles at her before slamming the door >several hours later she knocks at my door again >i open, i see she removed the urine soaked shirts i threw in the hall >'here user i'm sorry about earlier' >hands me a 2 liter of Mountain Dew: Code Red and 10 piece Wendy's spicy chicken tendies >stuff 2 in my mouth >issh okay thanksh mom >slam door Why the fuck can't people just listen to simple instructions? I don't repeat myself.
>Be hanging out with my daki (Mikiru is best waifu) >Mommy comes in and asks me if I want to go to Friendlys for a platter of tendies and some icy creamy >Clap excitedly and rush to the car with Mikiru >Sit in backseat with her, mommy gets to car and starts driving us to Friendlys >Mikiru gets frisky and starts eyeing up my crotch >Decide to give her a show >Pull out my cock and start tugging it around >Mikiru looks at it hungrily, cum on her face in a matter of seconds and scream >Hear mommy sigh from front seat and mutter that she made a mistake >Tell her it's okay,I love mommy and I can get her her OWN Daki >She sighs, obviously with relief >We get to friendlys, get out with mikiru and we order three plates of tendies and frenchies, thinking about what kind of Icy Creamy I'll get >Mommy orders a glass water and some toast >Asks for three slices instead of two >Warn her not to go over board or new Chad Daddy might not like her flab flab >Shes so grateful for my advice that her eyes start to water >Me and Mikiru finish our tendies and mommy makes a comment about me not throwing stones >She KNOWS I'm sensitive about my beautiful curves >I control myself, but Mikiru is in love with me >She lunges forward and attacks mommy for disrespecting her hubby >Waitress comes over and grabs me >Why grab me? Mikiru is the one hurting mommy! >Realize... the waitress is in love with me too >Lunge forward and start making out with her, Mikiru stops attacking mommy for some reason >Waitress pushes me away, I knew I should have stuck with Mikiru >Shit pants and start crying >everyone in restaurant staring at us >Manager man comes and says we have to leave >Never got my icy creamy >REEEEEEEEEEEE >Go home with mommy, she's apologizing for ruining my night out >Tell her that after TONIGHT, only a threeway with mikiru will make up for what she did >Mommy starts sobbing tears of joy knowing that she can do something to make me forgive her >mfw
After the whole szechuan sauce shitshow, stories like this have only gotten funnier.
Asher Nguyen
>wake up to my room of piss jugs and shit bottles >first thing I do in the morning is check my gbp >saved up enough good boy points to buy a steam card >crawl out of my teen titans go blanket (I got it from Santa instead of coal for being a good boy) >rip off page of my gbp chart and hobble downstairs >mummy cooking me a breakfast of tendies >"mummy mummy! I saved up enough good boy points to get a steam card!" >"let me see that my special little boy. You've been so good these past few weeks! Here are your chicken tenders." >fucking normie cunt, who calls them chicken tenders >eat my mountain of tendies then get into the car >mummy starts to drive >suddenly get motion sick >"mummy I don't feel very good" >puke all over the back of her car, tendie chunks everywhere >oh my god! -10 gbp. We are going back to the house now >what the fuck you stupid bitch I was good all month for that steam card >was going to buy Sakura Angels with it >get back to the house >enact plan of revenge >mummy goes to sleep >pick up shit jugs with caution, pull out mummy's space heater and place the shit jugs with it next to her bed >20 min later >shit bottles explode >hot poop splatters everywhere >mummy gets plastic shard in her eye >has to go to the hospital >doctor said its infected and has to be removed >mummy now looks like nick fury fucking normie bitch that's what you get for taking away my gbp
>Monday afternoon >tugging it to Nick Jr all day long >Finish squeezing big boy gooey gunk from my winker >Mumsies comes home from work >Poo poo in my diapie due to excitement >Earned 70 good boy points earlier today by promising not to empty my piss bottles on mumsie's bed while she was at work >Expect delicious tendies immediately >Squat walk downstairs with full diaper of excitement >No good smell >Mumsie looks upset >user you're 33, I talked with a friend about getting you a job >Fucking normie mom >Remove my shit filled diaper and wield it like a sling >IM A GOD BOY I HAVE GOOD BOY POINTS GIVE ME CHICKEN TENDIES >user please.. >IM DAVIE YOURE GOLIATH >Swing my shit sling at her >Diaper falls apart and flings wet sloppy big boy chocolate all over the room >Ring of fecies whips her in the eye and she falls do the ground recoiling and grabbing her face >Slap her open handed and squat over her face >YOUR LACK OF TENDIES SEALS YOUR DOOM, I LOOSE MY BOWELS WITH A BOOM! >Queue a huge wet fart bubble followed by a mexican mudslide in the rainy season >Literally pours over her face like a generous helping of piping hot chili >She wipes it off her face and tries to gasp for air >Quickly plug her shit covered mouth with my still-erect big boy weenie peenie >GIVE ME EXTRA GOOD BOY POINTS OR ELSE ILL CHOKE YOU MUMSIE >She spasms and mumbles what might be a yes >waddle back to my room and play some XBox >Serves me tendies later while sobbing and promises to give me lots of good boy points >mfw I put that bitch in her place >mfw I always get my way.
>be me >530 Lbs of mummy's golden child >sitting on toilet squeezing out a big poo that I've held for a day >finally drops out along with a BRRRRRAPPPPPPFFPPPPTHTHTHTPPP >look in the bowl at my masterpiece, skidmarks longer than the M6 >"Mummy, MUMMY, come and see what I did!" >mum unlocks the door from the outside using the special key for emergencies >proudly point at the toilet bowl >wow! You've done so well, and it's all in the bowl too! That's 10 good boy points >clap my hands because I've been saving my good boy points for weeks, finally at 150 >cash them all in for a special hour with my catgirl >mummy phones up the people who send the catgirl and talks with them >hear girl arrive at the door and sit on the end of my bed and take off my pants for the first time in 2 days >can hear them talking downstairs >"God, it's not him again is it? He's getting too large for me to do anything" >hear mummy say "Please, we have a system and it's the only way I can get him to do anything" >girl sighs and says "I have the catears headband too, I'll be wearing it again?" >clap my hands because I can tell special time is about to begin >girl comes into my room and meows and purrs >have special fun time, she makes my peepee feel good >the next 50 minutes are spent while I tell her about my comics and my video games >she's really impressed >eventually leaves after the hour is up >mummy comes up with my snack of tendies for being such a good boy >"enjoy your tendies, snookums, I have to leave now for my nightshift" >eat my tendies in bed and dream about my waifu Mikasa-san afterwards
How can anyone diss the NEET life? Enjoy your long hours and ungrateful wives, wageslaves.
> Be healthy 380 pound baby with a loving mommy > wake up right on time at 5:25pm after a night of intense gaming on garys mod > Go out with mummy to buy the minecraft sword I was promised, to defend against normies > Arrive at Gamestop, mom makes GBP transaction with the wagey behind the counter > Feel instant rush of anger when I finally get the sword, because I need to show I'm superior to dumb wagecucks > I hit the wagey with it, as hard as my big boned muscles will allow me to > "user! WHY!?" > "DUMB WAGESLAVE MADE ME CAVE! LET ME GIVE HIM A BOO BOO OR I DO A POO POO!" I wittily reply > "user! 200GBP GONE MISTER" > This dumb bitch thinks she can get away with this, I warned her > "REEEEEEE" I scream, as I pull down the shelves in the store to block off mommy > Rip down my diaper, the stench immediately causes the other customers in the store to vomit > Put my brand new awesome sword between my bum bum cheeks, pointing it behind me > Start fiercely grinding on the sword, the mere sight causes all the normies in the store to get shocked from amazement > Can feel the individual pixel changing as I do move it > Sword is now covered in my healthy, thick blood > Pee on the sword for good measure > I am now the master of all the elements, blood, pee pee and poo poo > "GIVE ME TENDIES NOW MUM" > Start hitting everyone in the store with the amalgamated weapon > Everyone flees > Start rolling around in the aftermath > Pass out, because I was hungry > Wake up in bed with tendies > gobble them up and waddle to living room > mommy happily swinging on a rope by her neck > doesn't even poke me with the ouchie-medicine like she does everyday > Decisive victory
