Which branch should I join?

which branch should I join?

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None of them?

Marine corps. Shits fucking awesome

If you're here, it means you're not Chad enough for any of them.

spaceforce

Navy, atleast you can choose your rate. did 6 and am out 100% disabled and living the dream

Marine

Join the coast guard. Shit is so cash. Plus easy transition to civilian gov jobs. Most DODs dont even know how good it is.

If you need to ask go Marine.

And take it easy on the crayons.

That’s like u asking what pc should I buy, mainly what u want it for and what’s ur budget right, so by that logic you have to look at what you want to do and what is in ur power to do, like if u want combat but aren’t physically up to it, then army, if you want college and want good benefits that’s the Air Force, the army is like a jack of all trades, not too hard to get into and u will have college time depending on the job, take the asvav first that will help u eliminate a lot of job that u can’t do, and the ones you don’t want to do you already know, so after all u gotta do I look up jobs in each branch, pick 5 do more research and start eliminating branches based on ur specific needs, and yeah if you can pass a background check, probably yeah if you have no criminal history up to secret it’s real easy, then stick to one and see where it goes, talk to some recruiters, I highly suggest at least 3

>TL DR
Go marine faggot.

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Think years ahead, I can’t help but remember a police lieutenant and one Sargent telling me if I wanted to get into police to get a business and management degree and not a criminal justice, the reasoning? One you have somewhere to go after you come up for retirement or decide to leave, and two is that criminal justice degree helps u when you’re in the police but it doesn’t help you get promoted or ready for a business like environment, but a bachelors in Business and management will. So certain soldiers I talk to tell me they got mo where to go after military, they are in the army, everyone gets payed the same no matter the job, only rank and time in get u more and certain certificates like airborne or language but that’s about it, you do 9 years as a soldier and what’s that gonna get u when u get out, a security guard or an armored vehicle transport job, think ahead get a job with certification like It or electrician so you can at least get a technical license to use in the civilian atmosphere when u decide it’s time to go

>mmm grayons

I work on Apaches in the Army...

Most people in the army told me airofrce go airforce I am about to make the same mistake but fuck it I want it this way, gonna join soon, luck my borther

Also, either

A)
>You'll get to learn some cool shit
>Get to know some cool, and maybe uncool people
>Maybe, just maybe, you'll score. Can't guarantee it will be with the opposite sex, goes for both genders
>Yeah kinderfucker, two fucking genders. Deal with it
>Might travel
>Might have a purpose in life

or

B)
>An hero from PTSD

We all win.

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>Not enlisting on the best branch

Why join if you are not gonna taste the crayons?

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I don’t want to die, marines are crazy man, I want a quiet IT desk job, I don’t want to meet the hijab wearing motherfuckers 1000 miles away from the nearest Starbucks, ew nah cluck I’m joining the army

Then go navy you full blown faggot, or if you can't swallow the killometric fuckton of gallons seamen drink daily then go chairforce.

Why stupid fucks even consider anything other than greatness is beyond me.

I don’t know man really worried about me security clearance, I got a naturalized citizenship, a big ass 2 inch appendix scar, hate the fucking ships, too pussy for the marines, got a 91 on the asvab too fucking stupid to join the airforce, fuck m8 I’m all outta options, 190 and 5,5 btw

No lie, CG is pretty bad ass
AF sounds good too.
Marines and Navy if you like war.
I hear nothing good about Army.

But that is all uneducated opinion.

>ASVB 91
>5'5" , 190lbs
Jesus fuck dude, will the Army even take you at this point?

Guerilla. Organized military is for pawns.

Listen here boi, I’m this close || to endin it son, don’t push it

Lol do it faggot, not like anyone will notice unless you An Hero live.

Chadforce. Army is too hard, might break your delicate bones

Bruh I live next to a school, you wan guns banned in the US motherfucker??

Officer in the air force. Love it

USAF all the way if you just want to do something unspecific- otherwise choose something specific.

Ok, ok.

Here is some serious advice, since I actually didn't read your shit until now.

You are fucked, but let me explain onto why.

The best military life in all of the branches is the officers' life. Just by your height you are out.

Being overweight doesn't rules you out until you get diabeetus or some fat related disease.

Another troublesome subject is your age, the older you get the more shit you face like me. You can go reverse for any branch until like 25-28. After that you run short of options.

Aside from all that, my recommendation still stands, AF or Navy for IT. And they both are for faggots so you will fit in good.

And as other user pointed, your third option would be CG because of the living standards, you might or might not be working on ships. And you have a very decent ASVAB.

Take the shot if you plan on having a life, you won't turn into a normie but you won't be a stupid socially inept fuck.

The social anxiety and akwardness will never go away tho but you have to be asexual or utterly retarded to not score, trust me.

Depends user. Marinefag checking in

lmao bootlickers itt

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Do it faggot.

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Usmc has data specialist.

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Yeah, right.

OP's retarded and fat for that.

Nah nigga I’m good on the home front here, ain’t retarded or nothing just real worried about my nackgournd check and I ain’t got college so imma go army route and get my 4 years in and then go AF, no problem but I ain’t try nana do water fuck that

Not the Marines. I was a Marine and that shit blew camel dicks.

Wait a couple years and join the space force

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In the Navy to get those sweet white short short

Red crayons taste the best.

AF and Navy are better for "free" college.

Off course it's not free, you'll get you ass handed to you sometime but aside from that it's free.

Why not get a real job and not feed off of america's tit? fucking pathetic.

You would do good as an airman. Go Air Force faggot.

>best taste
>Not blue's
Stay pleb.

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chair force

>The year, After Colony 295.

Air force it's the nicest

The workforce

Coast guard. No chance of dying in war and you learn marketable skills.

Army’s pointless, Navy’s a hassle, Marines are retarded, and fuck the Chair Force.