I steal bikes for a living

i steal bikes for a living.
AMA

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Are you a coon?

where do you live

Although I might seem so because of my actions, my skin is whiter than Baron Trumps.

where do you live where bikes are actually worth stealing.

must be steady work since the police don't give a shit.

Scandinavia.
I would post pics in action for the meme, but not quite sure I'm capable of posting pics anonymously enough while on the go.
Scandinavia.

Regarding the cases that actually get solved.
I've heard the number 2% from multiple sources.
I doubt most even report it though.

europe seems like such an easy place to be a crook. no one has a gun. you can just break into anyones home and take what you want. if i lived there i would i already be a multimillionaire by now.

lol, yeah, I guess you could. But you have to be a big person, even if armed, most men are over 6foot and LARGE, fucking vikings.
There are obviously exceptions.
But I've actually thought about going quite far away and trying some BnE

go to the UK or sweden they are pretty weak and sissyfied.

kek
>he is unaware

thats why you wait for them to leave first

Obviously.
During working hours... i don't work overtime ;)

Would steal an overloaded homeless man's bike, or do you have certain off limits criteria?

and who bought them, or where do you get the profit, don't tell me that you go from place to place saying "i owned this bike and i want to sell it because bla bla"... fuck out of here if that is what you do... selling them through here is more worthy

how much do you make off each bike?

dudes in sweden are all your typical chad-ish tall blond haired confident people.

so much so that a lot of swedish chicks actually go for people from other countries who don't act like that, because they honestly stop seeing it as being attractive, since it's so common

I only take them if I estimate the price to be somewhere above (fuck it, might as well say where i live,) 10k SEK retail.
Internet, and bulk buys from those in organized crime.
Mostly internet though.
Set up a meeting spot, bike there (kek,) and taxi/uber back.
Really depends on the bike, I've gotten 9k SEK for a 12k retail bike. It was quite the treat to ride though.

Might add that I'm kind of a bike-fanatic.
Started stealing bikes for extra parts when i was young and poor. Now I'm a one man bike thieving machine.

This is true.

But like all others in modern society, if you see someone clipping a bikelock in broad daylight, you don't really think twice.. because who would be so bold to do it.. in broad daylight, if they didn't actually own the bike.

Why haven't you gotten a job yet, faggot

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fuck you nigger

I'm fucking great at what i do, make great undocumented cash and collect welfare for essentials.

Thank you, massa.

i dunno, if i was in a good mood i'd probably say something and depending on that mood possibly do something.

but yeah like 95% of people won't do shit. i used to do break and enters and the amount of people who see you who will pretend they didn't is fucking massive.

I'd say it's more like 99.99...%
I have gotten some looks, but nothing more, not´a single comment, ever.
You just have to do it with confidence, and you're golden really.

I'm out for a lil trip around the town to see if any bikes are left to their demise.
I'll update if i find something.

We all know that you're black, but how long has your dad been out to buy a pack of smokes?

>for a lil trip
>lil trip
>trip
>actually trips.

>99.99%

i guess it depends on the area you're in. sweden seems safer so it makes sense less people are hardened enough to risk actual physical confrontation.

I've got a target, just gotta loop around get some exitpoints

Speaking from years of experience

do you enjoy being a nigger?

i work in an office and speak properly, i'm in no way hard. my managers love me and i'm making great progress.

i grew up witnessing family members get raped and hung out with drug addicts and thugs from around 12 - 18.

the aggression from my childhood feeds my success as an adult. not everybody in those situations becomes a drug addict.

it's not as black and white as you may think

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OP how often do you steal these bikes worth ~$1200 USD?

Where you live so I can break your legs and shoot your kneecaps

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About once a week.
Sometimes tens a week, sometimes none a week

Push bikes or motor? Ps I live in UK and if anyone came into my house to steal anything I'd shoot them with my crossbow

DO YOU HAVE A LOICENSE FOR THAT CROSSBOW?

Hi, if I caught you doing this I'd smash your teeth in. My daughter has had two pretty expensive bikes stolen and I think it deserves a painful punishment. Tell me, if the penalty were to be flogged with a cane as in Singapore, would you quit being a plague on humanity?

Don't need one. It's 165lbs draw weight. Ordered off reputable website and all they asked me for is I'd when I ordered it.

Kek, pushbikes

How do you break into a u lock?

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Maybe, maybe not.
But since i started thread, i got One 1.5k USD bike and a couple of extra tiers for My mainbike.

Bolt cutters...?

Sometimes you do have to Clip en twice, depending in the model

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Dent puller and a screw?

I sincerely hope you get shot and bleed to death on the street you absolute waste of space and human life

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Takes to Long for My Taste, although effective of time's not a issue.
Bolt cutters does the trick, if you're decently strong.

Huh..?

OP has said he only steals expensive bikes. So, if you keep buying expensive bikes, they are probably going to be stolen if you leave them out on a bike rack. Buy cheaper bikes lol if you cant afford to lose it, you should get the lesser option.

But do as you will. That is what I am getting out of this grom OP

There are locks not worth the effort tbh
/OP

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thought i might expand on this.
There are "link locks" (what i call them, don't know the official term, pic related.) they are a pain in the ass.
Also i'd recommend two locks for a maximum level of pain-in-the-ass for any bike-thief.
If I see a bike (even if it's a fucking 3k bike) with 2 locks, or a link-lock i skip that bitch

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What's your method of attack for most locks? if it's a cheap one do you use cutters/saw or do you rake the lock? You ever go after any big boy locks with quality bikes attached?

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>stealing shit that doesn't belong to you
>fuck right off

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Why?

normal boltcutters get through 90%+ of any locks.
Never tried picking, might be fun, but I'm done in 5-10 sec with a boltcutter.
From taking out the boltcutter to placing it in the bag again and being on the bike that is.

why what?
steal bikes?
money.

Why dont you get a fucking job?

He has one you fucking nigger

he steals bikes

have a better living through this.

fucking kek

Is your level of intelligence so low that you can't even manage to get a job better than this? Lmao you must have dropped out of high school to be this much of a loser faggot

Nope, i was in the equivalent of collage.
Did drop out though.
But no, I literally can't get a better job.
I get about 100k SEK every month in the summer months if i feel like it.
All about that cash bruv.
I sell other things to keep me comfortable during the winter months.

Why don't you go back to school to make something of your life instead of relying on stupid people to leave out their things? If you get caught, you're pretty much fucked by that point.

>collage

>you dumb fuck better yourself and become more employable instead of stealing other people's things

>asshole

Academic settings annoy me.
And i'm making a Good living off of it.
>If you get caught, you're pretty much fucked by that point.
Nah, i only have One extra bike at My place at once. Of course stripped of any Serial Numbers stickers and such.
Every bike that i use, i bought with cash and have registered on manifactures website.
>Memearrows

cant wait until your dumbass finally gets caught one day and tried under a felony charge lol

Lol.
Wont happen.

so like, what's your plan for the future. are you going to keep doing this for the rest of your life or what

I'm setting something Up, actually gonna have the funds to do it by next year.
A mostly-cash bizniz with room to finagle in some extra "purchases" every Day.

Ie, all My stockpiled cash Will be liquidated into a company i own