CONFESSION BREAD: Extreme edition

CONFESSION BREAD: Extreme edition.

We don’t wanna know if you jizzed in a girls water bottle, we want murders, rapes - the good stuff

Attached: 24F248E6-48A2-4C08-B1EF-04E508936DEE.jpg (1125x1125, 218K)

I once didnt thank the bus driver

I stole a quarter once from the collection plate

Attached: 28902345786.png (640x262, 179K)

i stole a bag of m&ms from a convenience store

I shidded farded and cummied in ur mums anus lel

Attached: 1488837678_8812f6518a24e1a37dafa8f938c66a76.jpg (550x692, 57K)

All jokes aside, I once forcibly gang raped a girl with an entire football team. She ended up killing herself not too long after. She was a ho though

Killed a couple dogs as revenge for the death of mine.

Ended up with an animal cruelty charge.

I paid my dues to society.

And how did that make u feel user?

Does the murder and posthumous sodomization of your mother in 1993 count or is that beyond some statue of limitations?

I robbed a local pharmacy with my friend at the age of 15

How did you kill the dogs user?

Story?

I dropped uni twice. But, in the second time, did differently. Kept going out by the morning, and, by sheer luck, got into public service through a test. Kept lying for more two years, when the guvment changed the rules and started to demand degrees for the job. Everyone from my family, even my wife, thinks I do have a law degree. It's been 8 years living a lie, dunno what to do now

Sploogin' in a gal's water bottle can be lethal. I do that constantly. I have full-blown AIDS.

When i was 6 i pushed my kindergarten teachers 3 year old from about three meters high, he fell on his chest and couldnt bread anymore, died later. The teacher wasnt in the room so i just walked to the otherside of the room and acted like he fell by himself.

Yeah...

assaulted anti-fascists with a broken bottle over them calling me a nazi

What happened to the teacher?

Kek

Raping and roasting infants, does that count or is that in bad taste (some tasted pretty good...)

Story bro

Cleanest way I could think of. Drowned em.

Not the best way to go but. I regret it to this day.

I stole a Pokémon trading card collection book from another child when I was 4. He was a friend of mine and I never in my entire life had the guts to confess. I'm just not criminal material I guess.

What breeds? I feel like crying today
My feels

Lmao just get the degree in stealth

one day nazi cunt

Its okay fam, I got your back

Attached: 78396B99-E03C-49A0-BD34-677D39DC2ABB.jpg (400x720, 39K)

That's not cool. Grow up, man. If all they did was call you a name, you can't handle that without becoming violent? That would make you a violent, reactionary fanatic. You don't have a place in a decent society.

Sexually abused several 6-10 year old neighbors when I was 11-13 years old

Mine was a German Shepherd that got ran over by some fucking bastard.

I'm a furry and I hoard lost of 2D porn, I don't have any fursuite or any of that stuff, I have a normal sex life though.
I'm normal?

Attached: 1236524.jpg (600x800, 91K)

>be 16
>urge to kill
>parents divorce
>dad goes crazy
>he buys two cute labradors and a cat
>loves the shit out of them
>talks to them all the time to cope
>talks to them more than me
>he is obsessed
>they are completely untrained, he loves them so much he lets them get away with anything
>clears out my mums old room and uses it as pet room
>pets have bigger bedroom than me
>annoyed as fuck
>wait till all gone to sleep
>dogs are sleeping with dad
>cat is in pet room
>put cat inside plastic bag
>beat cat to death with hammer inside bag
>INSANE THRILL RUSH
>go downstairs
>lure dogs out with toy
>lock one dog in pet room
>take other out to park
>stab it in throat, watching it bleed
>feel so powerful
>go back home, lead other dog out and do same
>leave pulpy cat in dog shit bin
>next day dad has totall breakdown, completely in tears
>then doesn't speak for two days
>attempts suicide
>I go to live with mum
>visit him three months later
>three foot beard, no showers, 7 dogs, at least 10 cats, some strays just come in through window
>kill all of them
>dad kills self

Make it short.

I dotn know. i got to 1st grade soon after

Ed G

I coming for YOU, you bastard!

This is nothing illegal, but i accepted about 15 minutes ago that I am low key ashamed of my obsessions/fetishes. Im not into eating shit or anything too fucked, I just like feet and CBT and i guess i just need to accept that.

Also I am insisting communist rebellions in Africa to start WW3 by shipping never gas to Kenya. Please don't tip off the CIA or ISIS.

your DNA is shit good riddance to everyone related to you

The only option

...

I feel like you're going to die ironically because of Karma being a bitch and all.

You drowned away a life.


You'll probably die in a fire.

Why would you want to start a world war????

i guess so user, being a furry alone isn't too bad really.

...

I really enjoy watching the sky for objects and talking with other people

I ate a grape at the grocery store.

Murder has no statue of limitations... At least in the US

err because of kikes, I mean to stop. you got me, i didn't think that far a head.

Because God values dogs more than Mankind?

absolutely disgusting

a fire is a pretty clean way to die.

i jizzed in a girls water bottle
she liked it

Nah, because karma is a bitch.

I stomped on a rats head today.

...

>nazi
>reactionary
sure, commie

...

Attached: statue-of-limitations.jpg (540x699, 111K)

...

Fucking degenerate, you should be shot.

Attached: Concern intensifies.jpg (800x533, 103K)

Like that flag?

Tom Paine?

I kick ugly dogs because i think its funny

Are you kicking yourself?

Fak off nigger

Whats karma?

No, mainly shit-zoos and those fucking stupid taco dogs.
Not hard enough to do serious damage, just hard enough to hurt while the owner isnt watching

"shit-zoos"

Just because the Chinks bred them into irrelevancy doesn't mean they deserve to be kicked.

The Fire of a wolf still lives in em somewhere.

An hero

What's this you've said to me, my good friend? Ill have you know I graduated top of my class in conflict resolution, and Ive been involved in numerous friendly discussions, and I have over 300 confirmed friends. I am trained in polite discussions and I'm the top mediator in the entire neighborhood. You are worth more to me than just another target. I hope we will come to have a friendship never before seen on this Earth. Don't you think you might be hurting someone's feelings saying that over the internet? Think about it, my friend. As we speak I am contacting my good friends across the USA and your P.O. box is being traced right now so you better prepare for the greeting cards, friend. The greeting cards that help you with your hate. You should look forward to it, friend. I can be anywhere, anytime for you, and I can calm you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my chess set. Not only am I extensively trained in conflict resolution, but I have access to the entire group of my friends and I will use them to their full extent to start our new friendship. If only you could have known what kindness and love your little comment was about to bring you, maybe you would have reached out sooner. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now we get to start a new friendship, you unique person. I will give you gifts and you might have a hard time keeping up. You're finally living, friend.

good try FBI

I stole and sold millions of euros worth of drugs. Not actually killing someone but indirectly

Shi-Tzu and a Scottish mix.

They had nothing to do with anything except for that one day my German Shepherd was visiting and those little dogs decided to go full on ... how to describe.. alert? mode or attack mode? They were real brave behind that glass door.

>asking for a friend, how did you do that

>Be me, first day of third grade
>Look around, don't recognize anyone
>Notice qt3.14 Asian girl smile at me
>Empty desk next to her, don't mind if I do!
>Tall black kid blocks my path
>'Dats my girl man"
>I look around, girls giggling and pointing at me
>Emotions roil through my gut
>Almost instinctively I kick him as hard as I can in his nuts as I yell 'DEEZ NUTZ NIGGA'
>He falls into a heap of himself crying
>Principal runs over and says 'what are you doing?!?'
>Turns out I seriously bruised both of his testicles
>I'm no longer allowed to teach in that school district

Attached: hiyooo.png (566x425, 267K)

Holy shit man how can you live with yourself

As a kid I knew an altar boy who was slow
On some days I'd sit in the very back and take money of the plate before he walked back and then we'd pocket it

When I was still really young, like 8 or so, we were forced to collect money for charity for our school. Back then it was with papers and a sealed collection box, the paper was to make sure no money was stolen.
So we made them write their donations with an ink pen, then used an ink eraser to get rid of all but a couple of donations and pocketed the rest.
It wasnt even a lot of money, I just hated having to work for some fucking chairty

Attached: 2458.png (354x722, 221K)

I find that quite entertaining

I like kicking stray cats

It's the dumbass rat's fault for not Superguarding.

just try drugs, get addicted, know shadt people and people with money. work it out without violence.

the stealing is another thing.

Hold up

Fake and gay

In second grade I use to finger myself in the middle of class I didn't know any better and was a victim of sexual abuse so I thought it was okay to do in public...I would moan really hard and the teacher was an older woman she never said anything just let it happen... eventually I grew out of it but I'm still an exhibitionist to this day

I kill my cat with cruelty, i just strangled she(for several days), i was feeling much hate, and need to discharge it, now i regret, but sometimes i have that felling getting bigger, i don't know if i going to do someting like this again, but if i do, i'm gonna kill a person

Didnt know what was sex really, just had 7 yrs old, because of my latin american genes I looked very diferent from this blonde beautiful girl. At that time I had the curiosity of how kids are made and how a vagina without hair looks like, because I was an innocent kid I didnt bother keeping that to myself one day I asked that girl if she has any hair in her vagina to then ask her how it look like, she just laughed and never anwered me, I didnt care so I forgot about it the day after.
So as I mentiones my parents and her mom were friends so sometimes I went to her house. Not more than a moth passed and I got to visit her, we were playing in her garden which by the way was giant because of the luxurious property his father left when he died, so we were playing until we got tired and sat on trhe grass. We started tallking about supid shit until she retook the thing about her vagina, she started talking to me about how her mom told her to clean her vagina and how important it was for her to not let anyone see it, she prceeded to drop her dress and panties in front of me, my 7 yr old mind couldnt handle the curiosity so I proceeded to ask her how does she pee, she smiled and opened her vagina to give me a 5th grde biology class, at the end I got a little creeped out but I got confused about why she hadn two holes, after asking her shat the otrher hole was for she told me that she doesnt know but she touches it sometimes, didnt even thought about it twice and asked her if I coiuld touch it, she nodded and I basically incerted my index finger in her vagina, after a brief moment she told me to stop because it didnt feel good so I apologized and took my finger out, we soon forgot bout it and kept playing.
Now that I emember I get weirded the fuck out because of the fact that she may remember it too

Attached: 1540874870728.png (646x595, 280K)

sorry for the spelling errors I have a shitty keyboard

I don't see the problem bro.

I actually jerked a friend of mine when we were 12 years old. And I've never tought of having homosex.

well thats waaaaay more fucled up when you realize that your friend may be very embarrased about what you did to him, that may follow him for the rest of his life

I jerk off a little boy(13yo) in the pool once

Would be pretty innocent if you weren't 38.

In fortnite?

i was 16 or 17, still have feelings to him

But are you a grill

These guys jumped my buddy like 6 years ago. They were a couple years older, 5 of them. Growing up there were 2 towns next to eachother that didnt get along at all. My buddy was dating a girl from the next town over. These guys caught him walking the railroad tracks headed back to home
And kicked his face so much he broke his jaw and fractured his cheek bone. They then spread his legs while one of them legit repeatedly booted his nuts in. He was in the hospital for quite awhile, he was a mess.
My buddys and i got word what happened and found out who did it.
That weekend we found out they were having a house party at one of their parents houses while they were away. Come that night we piled in a pickup with brass knuckles and bats, like 8 of us. Boys....we tore that house apart, there was people running and fighting everywhere. 2 of us put the fridge through the front window, tossed their couch out afterwards, the walls were smashed. We fucked those boys up and their house. Sped off
I was like 20, im 56 now. Country livin

How's it feel knowing you destroyed a family's life?

no, but i can be for him

Yes

Attached: download.png (240x240, 7K)

Good

i said fuck you to a police

Ewww fegit

Sorry i meant to say 36 years ago ha

I continually molested my best (both of us male) friend when I was 12-13

we are not friends anymore, I suppose because of what happened. if you still see that girl then yes, lol, its kinda cringey

no I dont

He was fag too, small body compared to the kids with his age, and a little effeminate, cute tits

degenerate

I like to torture dogs and cats

then... girls have told me they've been sexual very early, before than us... so maybe you can think she was doing on purpose, hahaha

YOU SHULD KILL UR PEEPEE INSTEAD YOU NIGGER ASS

heh

I had a similar experience when I was 5 I would have these like naked sessions with my friends when we would have playdates

Sick bastard

boy or girl friends

Not a water bottle but I was staying at a hostel once in a coed room and the shower was stopped up a bit. I dropped a joad of jizz in the shower and mixed it up in the water some, I was thinking of this cute French chick staying in the same room knowing that she had the shower after I did.

Attached: IMG-20130608-WA0000.jpg (600x800, 55K)

OP here, user I am disappoint. Thread dead

I provoked several shithole countries.

Attached: 2017-09-16-01-05.jpg (560x400, 28K)

i like to torture cats and dogs

I put a drop of whiteout on the wings of a ladybug once and watched it try to fly away. I still feel guilty about that.

New interedasting bread

Fake, OP here, thread still alive

I once paid a black man reparations. He kept returning for more. I said you can't keep hanging around here. Yet he kept coming back. Now he's hanging around here permanently.

I'm a crime scene cleaner. Despite the title, the majority of the work is cleaning bloody indoor suicides or meth labs. For one job, a kid offed himself with a deer slug and made a huge fucking mess, worse than most. We arrived within a few hours of it happening which is rather uncommon. The EMS were pretty damn lazy this time since they did an absolutely horrible job of removing shit other than the body. Found over half this kid's brain behind a dresser along with his partial face. Being the degenerate faggot I am, I saw this as a great opportunity to be a cannibal. I put what was left of the brain in a recovery bag (small ziploc baggie which is typically labeled for personal belongings) and tucked it in my jobsite backpack. Keep in mind my coworkers and I do fucked up shit on jobs but nothing to this extent. After the day's shift, went back to the extended stay hotel and washed that fucker vigorously. Fried it up on the small skillet with salt as my only seasoning plus having no clue what the fuck I was doing. It was very watery and mushy. Took a few bites and found out it tasted a bit like bad seafood, minus that fishy smell. Kinda had the consistency of fat off a ribeye steak. Didn't vomit or gag, but I couldn't really stomach the rest so I threw it out back for some animals then went to Taco Bell down the street unfazed. Only time I ever did something like that on the job. Fun stuff.
>no I'm not sharing pics
>no I'm not some serial killer
>this actually happened fuck you
>pic unrelated

Attached: 1524758256998.jpg (450x450, 144K)

I used to take a big magnifying lens to ants, it was pretty funny once the beam was focused to see and hear them pop, then a little steam would come out.

>shipping never gas to Kenya
Never gas straight from the Never Land Ranch's children mine

I stole a balloon on free balloon day

Nice. You mentioned you guys do other fucked up shit to a lesser extent, examples?

What do you mean cleaner? Isn't cleaning up the responsibility of the landlord or the owner of the place, or do you mean forensics?

No it didnt because you cant eat human brains without contracting prion disease retard

>Killed in cold blood a litter of 8 kittens
>Killed the mom later, kitty Dad got off because of the owner
>Killed a fucking dog in a rage fit, fucker bit me
>Helped get rid of a body when I was very young, still not sure if it was human but learned a lot
>Shot a literal kilometric fuckton of birds from a sniping nest with small rifle
>Killed more cats
>Stole $10,000 USD and put them on my supervisor's desk, couldn't frame him in the end and the money "Was never found", still a very stupid crime
>Lied to police a fuckton of times

That's pretty much it. I'm just a possible killer, not much to say on any other regards.

I slurp the cum off my hand when I’m done beating off

I feel like you have plenty of karma on some site.

Put the chopped scallions, butter, and 4 tablespoons of oil in a large frying pan, add a pinch of salt, and gently cook the onions on a medium-low flame for 4-5 minutes, stirring frequently so the butter and scallions take on some colour but do not turn brown.
Meanwhile cut the brains crossways into fairly thick slices (about 4-5 slices for each half), flour them lightly and when the chopped onions are ready, place the slices on top, laid out carefully so they are not on top of each other. Cook for 5-6 minutes on each side, making sure they do not stick to the bottom.

I was working for an electrician and had to go under the house and the entrance was in this milfs closet so I went through her drawers found her panties and cane in them then just put them back

Fuck that indian karma crap, they can all drown in their polluted ganges for all I care instead bringing their filthy ways here to civilized nations.

Mostly drawing shit with blood if it's a giant pool that hasn't coagulated too much. Plus stealing shit that the family would never want back nor specified they wanted it recovered.
Forensics is a completely separate outfit that's part of law enforcement that we have little to no involvement with. Yes, the landlord or owner is responsible but most like to contract it out to crime scene cleanup or water/fire restoration companies to avoid liabilities due to biohazard removal laws. Plus few employees would ever want to touch that shit. We get paid from insurance policies for the majority of jobs.
I've heard that too but I fried that fucker until it was nearly burnt and only swallowed a few bites. Happened years ago and no health issues (yet).
That sounds lovely.

>Isn't cleaning up the responsibility of the landlord or the owner of the place,
.....who, not wanting to do it personality, hires a private crime scene cleaning company. Duh.

Only if the brain you ate had a prion in it idiot.

I've eaten sheep's Brain its fucking horrible how'd you manage

when i was kid, i kill acidentally three bunny, two cats and a dog(all cubs)

Gangsters, mobsters, etc who want to clean a room or apartment or clothing from their nefarious activities.

>I've heard that too but I fried that fucker until it was nearly burnt and only swallowed a few bites. Happened years ago and no health issues (yet).
Cooking it doesn't kill the prions. The incubation period can be as long as 10-50 years.

>three months
>three foot beard
Sounds legit

Maybe that user is a sasquatch?

Attached: MessinWithSasquatch_2_400.jpg (400x300, 52K)

i once took a kinder surprise egg from walmart

I once had sex in the missionary position for the sole purpose of procreation

>durrrr every brain has alzheimer's hurrrr

Attached: 56902387_10219438125570444_3094236775254589440_n.jpg (700x700, 18K)

Again I only had a few bites before I just gave up. Curiosity can be a good motivator, I guess? Never had any animal brain (ironically) so I can't really compare it to anything else.
I'm in a state that has fairly widespread chronic wasting disease in deer so I probably ate some of that, too. I suppose I'll have to wait a decade to see if either is going to fuck me over long term.

this is a nice fantasy, thanks user

I'd try human flesh at least once it doesn't really freak me out just the consequence of disease freaks me out

>Never had any animal brain
>fairly widespread chronic wasting disease in deer so I probably ate some of that, too.
Why does no one ITT know how prions work.

How cruel can this world be?!?!?

I crossdress downtown so i end up getting groped or raped every couple of weeks

Murder raped my younger female cousin. Turned out she wanted it more than I had hoped for so she kept resurrecting and fucking.
Immortal because of my dick, who knew.

I shot a man in Reno

shoved a homeless dude in front a u-bahn in der hauptwache
fag kept buggin me for something, wouldn't leave me alone
fest was going on, figured der polizei wouldn't look into it too much
wasn't worried i would get in trouble, especially give my credentials

Today I feel normal.

I always have to have something on... noise or other stimulation... otherwise I think too much.

My thoughts are usually memories of horrible shit I've done.

When its quiet I narrate my every move like reading a book... it's maddening...

Go to piss, hear this in my head, "He reached down and lifted the seat careful to avoid the mold... someday he would clean it. The seat banged as he reached... " etc etc...

I dunno wtf...

How do prions work? Enlighten us protein master.

Just to watch him die?

I hacked the 2016 election to make Trump win. Sorry, my Russian gf made me do it.

I wish it was a fantasy my mother confronts me about it sometimes also a few of my classmates being it up it's quite embarrassing

Different user here with a passing familiarity, so take it with for whatever... but human neural tissue doesn't have to be diseased to contribute to prion diseases. A misfolding can occur spontaneously, and there seems to be a correlation between the two.
The likelihood of developing symptoms is increased rapidly with continual consumption, but is nonnegligable from singular instances.
I wouldn't worry about it though. By the time you're likely to show symptoms, you probably would be old enough to get it misattributed to Alzheimer's.

When I was in my 20s I'd steal bras and panties from girls I thought were hot from the laundry after they were done drying. Then I'd go home and fap with them.

That's kind of interesting, bruh. But really if you want to control your thoughts and dampen that inner monologue you should

I impregnated a prostitute.

Fucking monster.

>my mother confronts me about it sometimes also a few of my classmates being it up it's quite embarrassing
how do they do that?

Do you speak English

In dribs and drabs

I ate 3 big kit kats from a store and didnt pay

Tracking down your IP as you read this. You're fucked

You're a real piece of shit

You piece of human garbage

The epitome of a cunt

I urinated several times in my roommate's shampoo bottle because he was an inconsiderate asshole and mostly because he was a fucking nigger.

You sick fuck

In third grade, I cheated on my history exam. In fourth grade, I stole my uncle Max’s toupee and I glued it on my face when I was Moses in my Hebrew School play. In fifth grade, I knocked my sister Edie down the stairs and I blamed it on the dog…When my mom sent me to the summer camp for fat kids and then they served lunch I went nuts and I pigged out and they kicked me out…But the worst thing I ever done — I mixed a pot of fake puke at home and then I went to this movie theater, hid the puke in my jacket, climbed up to the balcony and then, then, I made a noise like this: hua-hua-hua-huaaaaaaa — and then I dumped it over the side, all over the people in the audience. And then, this was horrible, all the people started getting sick and throwing up all over each other. I never felt so bad in my entire life.

You’re not getting me that easily, pig!

Fess up nigger!

leddit took this down so here for you.

so Ive done a large amount of nasty, vengeful things that im now coming to terms with. Ill start with some of my first memories. When I was really little I did little mean things talked trash about my fellow 5th graders and made fun of the disabled kids with the boys who most likely grew up to be druggies, at some kids party or something the mom was bringing around white milk. I hated white milk and when she went to pour me a glass I knocked over the glass and the jug of milk in protest, Stuff like that or another time when I explained to an unpopular kid in grade 6 why I had friends and he didn't. No one ever beat me in video games or board games because I would turntables and hold grudges against the winners, I told my parents I had no cousins after they beat me in monopoly. The last highlight ill name off is when my little brother was being bullied by some kids I joined the bullies and made fun of him, tied him to a rope and almost dragged him into the street.


Anyway time goes on we get to highschool and this is where drama got kicked up to 11. I would make fun of the tolkien weird kids still and disabled like I had always done, but I started preying on relationships. In elementary school we had no dating aside from like one kid who said he was dating some girl or something. So when all the kids started kissing, going out etcetera and I wasn't getting anything because my social skills suddenly begin to fall behind I jumped at the opportunity to weasle into people's business. I would tell people things that one person did or I saw someone do (all lies of course). This thrilled me greatly and I begin to go home and laugh/cry in bed while my parents screamed about some shit I forgot to clean. So as I said my social skills that got me through elementary school waned and I no longer had a position with the popular kids.

Attached: a985716a0b55235b1ab79037a6742ae816170859.jpg (900x1200, 406K)

I caught my girlfriend cheating with my best friend. When I saw them together, I got so furious, I slit their throats with my pocketknife. Then, I buried the two bodies and my mom got scared and said, "You're movin' with your auntie and uncle in Bel-Air." I whistled for a cab and when it came near The license plate said fresh and it had dice in the mirror If anything I could say that this cab was rare But I thought, "Nah, forget it. Yo home to Bel-Air!" I pulled up to the house about 7 or 8 And I yelled to the cabby yo holmes smell ya later Looked at my kingdom I was finally there To sit on my throne as the prince of Bel-Air.

But over time I found that being sweet ,silent and nice to all the adults got me pitty points with everyone. I so often got compliments on being the sweetest most shy girl in my classes. People saw me as someone to protect and I exploited this immediately. I was able to get in with the popular crowds by looking for protective leader types. People knew me and respected me and it felt great. Of course I didn't feel like I was letting out "steam" per say.

so I get older and am in grade 12 my last year and I figure out to my suprise girls interest me a lot more than boys do (not that teasing boys wasn't fun [im a rather cute looking girl]) I started...well..now that ive brought it up with people I know, what was basically stalking this girl to her locker every day and walking her to the bus. Looking back she was really uncomfortable and tried changing her route to get away from me which I found out and was upset about. I tried asking her ex how I could get with her and what he did to woo her. This made him mad (still unsure why) and I decided to scream at him when we were all hanging out one time saying she would never go back to him. I honestly didnt mean to yell, let alone say it out loud. They all looked shocked that such a shy, kind girl would outburst like that. anyway one day she tells me she has a boyfriend. Now you think I would have gone for the bf, but I didn't. I saw a new opportunity in a couple on the verge of breaking up. Now I did like this new girl from the couple so I figured I would "turn her gay" I used my cutey eyes to win over the boyfriends trust and then we talked about the juicy stuff like how he was having a hard time with her.

I then made friends with his gf who I started telling all the little flaws the bf told me and making them sound like terrible truths. Eventually I started flirting with her and she bit back and held my hand in the hall one day, I went home after this and touched myself to the smell of her hand on mine. Moving on I get bored of this girl and the high of sneaking around the couple gave me chills (proceed to go home fantasize and laugh/cry while dad hits me or something). this went on for a month or 2 before they broke up, the bf actual almost found me out and he confronted me to which I shifted the blame onto some jock he hated and solved the problem (escaping after to the bathroom where is smiled and let out my jitters from almost being caught). So they break up and bf goes and gets drunk out of sadness with a group of friends and something really bad happens that id rather leave out and to your imagination

College roles around and I treat it like high school two electric boogaloo. meet a girl who I get to be friends with and told her roommate she was spreading lies that he raped her, she got kicked out and couldn't go to school anymore. That was the only substantial thing aside from stealing from friends houses. Eventually I get a huge bag of karma and I suddenly start getting horrible thoughts and into arguments that leave me so upset suicide seems like the answer. Being gay makes me think I should kill myself and I get diagnosed with a ton of mental illnesses. Over time through counseling and self help I start seeing how awful I could be and how being nice would be so much better for my life and others.

all me for your viewing pleasure

Attached: 3fe29084bff33aba2641637f1f5295eb83e854d6.jpg (800x1131, 454K)

OP here
>Tldr

Post tits if true.

I ate out and fucked my ex-wive's little sister. It was great! She came back the next week and asked for more. I don't think her husband was good at oral sex, because she made a specific reference to cumming on my wonderful tongue.

Why wouldn't you kill them or do something worse? Just beat them up? You are a fucking pussy after what they did to your friend.

I’m 18 F and still in high school and I invited a 24 year old to my house when I was home alone to fuck me

Fucking shot my neighbor's dog with bb gun whenever it was late at night and it was just yapping away, do I regret it, A bit, Would I do it again, Yep

you are a balding and chubby 35 year old man who is planning on fapping furiously to all the lonely male replies to this

They beat his friend up bad, so naturally they beat the shit out of them in return.

I guess I can try. I was a mean ass kid who loved putting down everyone. In highschool I broke up three people and drove the last couples bf to suicide with like 3 other people and I get an emotional high like no other seeing people sad or emotionally broken. Oh and I get off to women in any way I can and I tried to kill a squirrel. Thats as short as I can make it

Attached: 25c859ba97bfe598fa54d95535da6411441126b7.jpg (800x1132, 820K)

My god you're insane. I wouldn't have believed someone could do something so vile until I read this reply. I feel sick

Attached: getout.jpg (620x285, 24K)

I stabbed a homeless person to death in an al-... I mean I stole a pack of chips from a corner store

Ma I’m starting to like this kid.

Knowingly gave a hot lay in college and STD. Came buckets of chlamydia, I honestly don't know what I was thinking.

fags like you keep me in business printing fake certifs so keep it up bud!

LMAO holy shit Im fucking dying

Dad got me pregnant when I was 13 and was made to give birth. I year later I couldn't stand the site of my daughter and couldn't bear her being raped by my father like I was so I tool her life making it look like an accident.

wew

I go nigger and gook hunting

thats fucking awesome, tell more plez

Attached: 1557086416013.png (960x823, 658K)

Philip??

i've slited my finger in my lil sister pussy when i was 16 and she was 8... sleeping in the same ben on visitation onmy mother '' friend''
she got awaken once and whe never talked about that ever .... still masturbate on this

Hey man. First off you brought up some very traumatic shit for me that I’ve been repressing.

When my grandfather shot and killed himself I was in shock since I found him. The cleaner didn’t care what was valued or not he just cleaned up everything as if it never happened. I haven’t touched anything where it happened. Idk if I can. But I never got to thank him, I feel regardless a cleaner could say “this isn’t worth it we need to destroy it” and he didn’t regardless it’s value or condition. So since I can never thank him, thank you.

hawt. Wanna fuck

What movie is this from?

your a trash , but i still want you on my cock

Who cares how it makes him feel. Doesn't bring back the dead girl, doesn't change what happened. The only place people care about how criminals feel about their misdeeds is at a parole hearing.

Sounds good bro

gf is out of town
is hot
is no tits
is rich af
is intelligent
currently ruining it with a 17 y/o stoner nerd kid who fucks like a fish and can't even walk her dog in her block without losing it.

I don't seem to care
but I might be ruining the only chance of happiness that I have

lol

how the hell do I shorten my story so the adhd ridden people here will read it? I poured 30mins into that shit for like no (yous)

Attached: 59a.jpg (341x512, 126K)

Just post it, faggot.

Don’t feel guilt over forgetting to thank him. It’s not a thankless job by any means but most people suffering trauma aren’t in their right state of mind (such as yourself) so I guarantee you that cleaner took nothing personally. It’s like any other job out there but sometimes we do stupid shit to distance ourselves from the work we do as a coping mechanism. Nothing but professionalism around customers. That story I shared wasn’t typical of course. It was after working 11 days straight on the road.
Hope you can find some sort of peace with your loss user.

Don't really know what to say, you already know yourself that what you did was horrible and you're working to improve. I wish you well user.

I spread and exposed my girlfriend's nude pictures to Neo Nazis online. She's a Marxist.

Based

Heil Hitler
(Post em)

I stole about $250,000 over the course of about a year and a half. I blew it all on roxies, heroin, and hookers. Lots of video games, too.

I am 100% serious. I hate myself and am disgusted with my past behavior.

Sounds about how brains should probably taste. Also, avoid doing that, you get diseases from eating brains. I'm too lazy to look up what it's called, google it yourself.

*yawn* I'm sure like 25% of all kids have done that.

I did

honestly im being pushy and self centered for asking for (yous) I apologise thanks for reading it through. Just felt like I should get it out being a bitch aint cool.

It isn't hardcore, but whenever my girlfriend is a bitch, I pull up her nudes on a flat screen and invite some friends.
We talk about kinky shit we'd like to do to her. She has no idea. She gets exposed, and it's hot as fuck knowing what my friends would do to her.

That's terrible, but also fucking hilarious.

If you're the girl story, honestly its not so bad and just sounds like a typical bratty girl who likes to lie, and if you came from leddit then I bet you probably thought what you did was a lot worse than it actually was

I jerk it exclusively to literotica with REALLY underage girls. Currently reading a series where a family friend abuses a preteen girl and makes her into a self-loathing prostitute.

Jenny's Couch

jennys couch is pretty great. Book 1 is the best, book 2 is a waste of time you should skip, and book 3 is alright. I still go back every now and then to read some of my favorite parts.

I’ve had sex with many underage girls. Youngest one was 12. She was so damn skinny and tight. Makes me wonder how I never got caught and landed in prison. Whatever. No regrets.

Attached: 46187ECE-069C-4224-A905-9778667D43D7.jpg (567x89, 8K)

...

Oh, and another one. I'm like 95% my cousin killed a dude outside bar. It was like a back alley situation, and it was over a girl. He has a temper. Cousin knocked him down near one of those large dumpster, and he landed kind of like sitting down with back against it. Started throwing knees with his head against the back of it, occasionally mixing it up with punches and kicks. I mean he beat this man like I've never seen. Dude was FUCKED, Considerably worse than Jared Leto in fight club, if you know what I mean. I have no idea how he could have survived that honestly. No one ever went back there so it would have been a while before he was found, and no way was he calling anyone, much less trying to move to get help. I felt fucking terrible that it happened, but it wasn't my business, and I'd die before turning in my family. We both checked the news and police reports for a while to see if anything ever came out about it, but nothing. The dude knew my cousin, so if he was able, I can't imagine he wouldn't want payback. Nothing ever happened, though, and now we just don't talk about it.

I got a kid flat out expelled in elementary school.
>be in 4th grade
>tolerate asshole kid who fucks with everyone
>this kid is a right prick
>steals shit
>harasses teachers
>killed lab animals
>he comes up to me before a test
>"can I have a piece of paper?"
>I shuffle my fat stack of college ruled notebook paper
>place it down in a nice pile
>"no"
>he gets mad
>hoesmad(24).png
>he tries to fuck up the clean stack
>uses a pencil to stab at it
>put my hand near the pile
>fucker stabs me
>well no shit
>took off some skin but meh
>realize this is the perfect opportunity
>bawl like a little bitch
>pick at the wound to make it more severe looking
>sent to the principal's office
>guy got expelled on the spot
>heroofthemojave.jpg

Attached: Screenshot_2019-04-02-03-10-41-1.png (243x202, 83K)

Yeah that sounds about right.

Also loved the CrazyJenny saga on Reddit.

not sure why, but pedos are great authors

Attached: hvEnAErXGxjLBoTpT0jJh5nWlRQdh617Q9NmQcVbxqk.jpg (599x758, 34K)

if you're on asstr, you might also be into domming daughter dani and some of the stuff by anonympc.

They're different but similarly well written.

I sometimes go on these kik groups advertised and when CP is posted i talk to the person and get to know more about them until its narrowed down to their name and city. No idea if i can goto jail been in the group when CP is posted and its their for everyone to see but i just forward their details to the department in their city.

eh I posted it on leddit as my first ever post and the stupid place took it down, gave up on it immediately. Its what I get for even trying the site I guess. I guess bratty girls arent in short supply most people ive told bits of the story to called me a narcissist a psychopath and shit like that and those were people from /b if I remember correctly.

Vigilante user. Respect.

Yeah, Asstr is a great place, but I'm relatively new to it (only a couple of years). My favorite I'd found there was Loli Island. It was adorable porn. I'll check out Dani.

I usually alternate between that and Sad Panda (Rock Cocks, Alfie, pic related)

Attached: LS_23.jpg (1280x1792, 543K)

i fucked a girl i was babysitting

Faggot

Underrated kek

Details

what do you want to know

How if faggot anons are just going to tip the FBI?

Attached: 1557037221319.jpg (546x856, 267K)

Just tip the FBI.Enjoy your time in jail.

This is what bad parenting causes.I bet that your parent were the worst

Attached: 1557105111024.gif (740x900, 1012K)

my dog got ran over by some asshole. got her from my grandpa when i was 4, had her 13 years. i often wonder what i'd do to the fucker who hit her. if they felt bad about or swerved just to hit her. did the person mean to hit yours?

It's Yea Forums, and... It's the fbi
They have better things to do than investigate stories posted to Yea Forums

Story?

OP here, I started a thread a few hours ago called “ask a hitman anything”, people believed me and I was lying very well. it was a good thread. I’m a bad boy

Everything

Imagine if it was a male teacher?Getting some weird fantasies

aint got time to tell it all, but it basically started with me creeping on her sleeping and escalated from there over that summer

Nazi

Ages?

>this was another good thread OP

Nice try FBI

Attached: 061206_article_nytv.jpg (241x299, 8K)

Chris Hansen isn’t FIB nigger

Fake and gay

Attached: khcbi28lsz811.jpg (598x582, 107K)

You're in the furry fandom, you're never going to be normal.

hahaha

i was 15 she was 8

When did he start with you user?

Earlier today I went through the Walmart "20 items or less" checkout with 21 items. Can't go back there for a while, I'm sure security has my picture and will be waiting to detain me

Thats the joke.R/woshhhhhhhh.

You said it escalated over the summer, tell a story or two?

What did she think of it? Did she have experience?

>implying it's EMS's job to clean up a corpse or its entrails

too lazy tonight. another time

she had no experience other than me. she liked some of it, didn't like some of it. she was always pretty willing though.

what is this some cheesy 80s movie. no way you can get away with that shit now

I use to get the popular highschool girls nudes and show most people. I ruined quite a few reputations and never got a girlfriend again. Seen as the least favorite person in my town now. Look back on it now and want to off myself for looking like such a faggot my senior year.

Attached: CDCC87AF-6566-49A8-8AF6-DD051E918513.png (326x264, 32K)

Were you able to fit inside her both ways? What was it like?

What didn't she like?

congrats brains of similar species have prions that can't be cooked out. ya done played yoself

I stole 5 dolars from my mom wallet when i was 6
S-ss-hould i go to jail?

i farted on a girls face when she was sleeping in my house

Things werent going well, my wife left me and i lost my cat. With help from abdul and the local community i got my life togheter. Everybody else had left me to rot, thats why i chose to convert to islam.

I have a confession to make. Andy's logs are steamy, creamy and dreamy. And nothing. I repeat, NOTHING will ever separate my love from his fat, juicy honkers. I love Andy's logs. And the rest of you are all logless shills. This has been my true confession and I'm sorry I kept it a secret for so long.

Attached: 1557039753650.jpg (640x631, 54K)

you sound like a shitty person seaking attention because you feel shitty.

Holy fuck, keep this garbage and yourself on leddit

nobody cares

go to hell jew

Attached: 0091_-_gu0XYfy.jpg (234x250, 10K)

Fuck off to reddit newfag

Checked

R/you’re a fucking faggot

Attached: 0561_-_IZ48FDJ.png (640x560, 25K)

tbh I didn't expect that you would feel bad about it in the end

I just hope you get away from your parents pretty fast
Maybe everything else will change then
Good luck to you femanon

Keep your dog out of the fucking road you retard

Now fantasize about killing yourself since you're the one who let your dog die

Tips on stealing so much money?

Club goin up
On a Tuesday...

Thank you for your service

Didn't read but have a (You)

>This'll be me one-day

Seen this pasta before
Still laughed

Keep it up!

Once stabbed a homeless guy to death. American psycho style

I dont really care or think about it. Its the first time in like 10 years I remember this.

I've been on an off and on relationship with a married woman. I made her leave her husband twice so far and they got back together. I love her, but I don't think we would work long term. I haven't talked to her in about 3-4 months. I miss her and I wish that we would reconnect, but I don't want to try and reconnect because I feel bad being a home wrecker and not being able to actually a long term thing for her.

Attached: 1508440625366.png (240x200, 18K)

I really enjoy posting stories of my life on Yea Forums and having people tell me how pathic I am and telling me I need to kill my self or how I will never amount to anything.
Or when people make fun of and humiliate me on voice chat in games.
I guess it's kind of a humiliation fetish?

kys newfag

>pathic
>go back to school retard

Sorry, it's late.

Get off bed and stop being a lonely pathic cunt

Insomnia.

Have you tried killing yourself?

Please tell me I'm a waste of life.

lol stop projecting. Most of us here are lonely.

Too much of a coward.

I love you user. you are so important to me.

I really wish that was real.

you are special to me and I think about you all the time.

Killing yourself isn't the answer. I've thought about it a lot lately, but I could never bring myself to that. I'm too prideful, and I feel like I could improve my life.

OP here, stop turning this thread into a therapy hotline for pussies. Fuck off and make another thread if you wanna attention-whore with fake threats of suicide so you can be stroked by anonymous people on the internet

Attached: D6692BA4-FEB8-41C2-92A3-CB5162C06054.jpg (960x540, 51K)

What if all you do is ruin the lives around you?

What are you upset about? What do you want out of life, and what's stopping you? Most people don't realize salvation and happiness isn't that far away. You just have to reach out and take it. Some people are in a deeper hole than others and some people are naturally in a better position, but everyone can improve their life no matter how pathetic their genetics are. They just have to have the drive to get it. I really feel like the thing that actually separates the successful and the normal people is the drive to never stop, because success isn't as hard as it seems. You just have to be contestant and never stop.

There is someone I really wish I could hear say that to me.

got discord? I'll say it.

He just said it to you, cuck

I doubt that you "ruin lives around you". If you had that power then you would be very special to that person/people to be able to ruin their lives. Don't let other people blame you for their problems.

I really wish she would say that to me again. I miss that time where i felt like I was someone else world, and they were mine. I wish I could find someone else like that, because every other relationship I've been in just feels empty.

Uh oh. I'm sorry OP. I just tried to add to the thread.

No idea what to do anymore. All seems so impossible. Everything I've ever attempted has been a fail.

But that's all I know.

Feels.jpg