Alright, fuck it. I am losing my mind one day at a time...

I'll save it but I'll have to add you later, keep that in mind since you see me message you sometime from the name RocketLauncher

My meds helped until depression started creeping in, then I realized that I was using them as a crutch. Combined with weed it's actually helping a bit, but also what helps was getting a job and getting a good place. Are you miserable where you're living?

Depression is genetic but the aggression you feel is normal because that's the sanest way to look at this world. Lots of fucked up things going on, lots of fucked up people, but at the same time you can't dwell on it. I mean I still rage at American killing Palestinians or whatever the fuck I hear about but then I still make sure that I'm making myself happy and feeling good. I used to not be able to think in my own house, so I couldn't even do that..

We're diff people of course

>I smoke daily
No wonder you're depressed

I have seen it many, many times. enacting it into reality is a very different feat.

yes v insightful tysm

+

cont from the pepe with his head missing,

weed is not good for being happy

You don't need to do some intensive workout if that's not your thing. Just working out daily is great, because you're right it literally gets easy. The hardest part is just doing it all the time, but it definitely gets easier
Anyone who tells you otherwise is either pumping a trillion pounds or they're just trying to discourage you

I know it doesnt do me any favors to be like this, that's why i put a mask on for people. but i still have to come home and be alone with my own thoughts each night. but there is no denying the truth in your words.

yeh but you only need to start with baby steps. like even take a shower everyday. something that simple. work towards other things. im an aspie so i dont do social stuff, but there is lots of different things you can do. learn to cook for yourself, try and find a part time job if full time is too hard, if thats too hard then look for a 0 hour one. you got it buddy just gotta start smol

>No wonder you're depressed
>weed is not good for being happy

I think it's really bad to use it as a crutch. I think compared to suicide or being fucked up on other stuff I think it's better for people who do use it as a crutch, but still it can definitely be harmful if that's the reason. I stopped for a long time then returned to it, daily, and I've noticed that without making a conscious effort of it I just started doing it at appropriate times and I've been super honest about it. I used to hide it or would hide the fact that I smoked or I would just do it as a chore and not really feel anything.

Depression mixed with that can be a bad idea if it's done as some daily grind you do to make you feel slightly better each day.

not miserable but there is no love. it is rent free, so i am in no position to complain. the anger is a natural thing, but the ways i think about handling it certainly is unnatural. i look forward to your msg

it's p much a long drawn out way to kill myself, you nailed it. but i mean, better to sedate ms or let this shit take hold of me and go out and put these fucked up schemes in my head into action? so far i have chosen the former, but each day i care a little less. I know I either have to get ms out of it or succumb, but neither is easy, for diff reasons. tbh i wish some drunk pos would just roll my fucking dome over some days, but here we are.

putting on a mask is healthy and natural.

you have to change the way your mind works.

instead of wasting time feeling sad about yourself, think about this:

on average you'll live to like 80

you've completed like a fourth of your life?

you have knowledge and wisdom you didn't have before.

you're gonna waste one of your precious days on this planet sad and upset?

That's inefficient as fuck, homie.

Every single day matters, you gotta live it and enjoy it. Being sad is a waste of time.

I love you, homie. How is your relationship with your parents?

I love you too, user. With either is not great, dad did meth for a decade and still beats himself up abt it but he's really turned it around and done his best to be with me during what youth i got left. with mom it's much worse, always more interested in some strange cock than feeding her son, typical ghetto trick shit from all the rap songs i have heard. nothing has changed in that department tbh, even still, i make an effort to try and keep what remnants of a relationship we have, despite her lack of effort. every trainwreck has a story, right? nothing just happens, there is always a sequence of events leading up to it. thanks for wasting your morning trying to cheer up some fucked up nigga, it really has uplifted me. maybe i'll text some girls tonight, just to have some interaction.

>noone wants to hang around the sad, depressed, edgy dude.

I used to do this to people. Not intentionally, and they'd understand, but I'd put them in a situation where they want to help but I would like just keep going on and on to where they just give up on me.

Friends should be there if you need them but they can't be your 24/7 watch

thanks to everyone who has posted in this thread, i feel a lot better. I feel lost in this world a lot but it's nice to feel compassion from strangers. gives me hope. I hope all of you get laid today, and make it out clean. OP feels better, i really didnt expect anything more than for everyone to call me a faggot, which i mightve deserved.

right how many times you gonna patch the hull before the ship just isnt seaworthy? I'm glad you've learned from your mistakes, user. too many people dont, or at least dont seem to. if you arent learning from your mistakes, why not just die? you're already one foot in the grave at that point.

user, I'm usually not the help a random person type but I'm fucked up on adderall and waiting in queue for dota.

anyway, something that took me a long time to realize is that parents are a really good source of life information.

they know you more than most other people, and they've lived for a longer time than you have.

talking to your dad about your problem could help in a way

but its up to you, man. Appreciate life while you have it. You've got a home and all your arms and a working brain.

Enjoy these gifts.

thank you user, good luck with your match. you make good points, all of which i knew but yknow you choose to forget sometimes.

some people don't even have friends that help them no matter how hopeless they are.

if you're starting at 0, friendless, you have to be a positive person that people want to be around

ofcourse you know everything I'm saying user, you're not dumb.

but choosing to forget realities is terrible for you.

escaping reality forces you to be sad when you come back.

I mean this in the kindest way possible, weed is horrendous for you.

Checked.
Deliver on that OP.
That’s how I keep my sanity
You just need a little bit of love to start
Don’t hit on the girls too hard be happy with friends
Gotta have your shit sorted to pull a woman but having them in your life is a good confidence booster
I was in the same boat 6 months ago
Gave up weed
Started showering every morning and night, brushing teeth
Dress up nice and go to a nightclub once a week
I might spend 50 bucks or so and I always go home alone but there is so much good energy there, not to mention casual body contact
I’m healing and gaining confidence slowly but surely

Baby steps bro, do something every day to make life better
Doesn’t matter what it is
Just keep moving forward no matter how slowly

i know it man. i need to quit but i get it for free so it's hard af. but you are right, what good is learning all this shit if i just erase it with pot? ty

ty sir, i'll do my best to follow your example. I only get one life, so i might as well live it to the best of my abilities, right? thanks for the knowledge, son.

I love you and believe in you, man.

Things always get better.

Remember a problem you had last year that doesn't exist anymore?

Yup.

realest shit ty for framing it for me.

>I just want a fucking hug
if you want some type of love. get a pet. just feed it, take care of it and it will give you love.
if a pet is not your thing
you could pay a good looking hooker to pretend to be your girlfriend for an hour. hugs, kisses(kissing a hooker?), fucking and then she goes away.

Where do you live?, I can bring some booze and we can just talk, play Vidya, watch movies...

No worries bro good luck getting your shit sorted

tulsa oklahoma lol feel free to add me on discord
distantanion #3102 i'll be able to meet you halfway once i get my car on my bday but thats a bit away. have a good one, fam. this world is so full of negativity sometimes i forget to turn around and face the light that accompanies it. ty for your kind words.

Fine, gonna add you after I get home

i look forward to it