I'd like to have sex before I die Yea Forums. How do you convince someone to have sex with you?

Where’s her clit?

Confidence is more attractive to woman than your pewny dick

Leave your fucking nest

Your little sisters friends are the best. If you have one anyway.

I don't know how to ask without looking like a creepy weirdo. Do you legitimately just ask for sex, or is it a bunch of nuance and innuendo?
I don't get liquid courage from alcohol. I just get a buzz. Are women just attracted to inebriated men, or is the assumption that the alcohol would somehow make me better at communicating?
Well, here's an anecdote to help you figure out how good I am at reading people:
>be me, a decade ago
>out barhopping with friends
>out of the blue, female friend starts holding my hand as we walk
>i have no idea what's going on, but i roll with it
>she tells me she's feeling horny
>i have no idea how to respond
>we get to the next bar and never speak of this incident again

And do what? I go outside and hang out with people. Then they all go home and fuck their significant others, and I go home alone.

>convince
there's your problem, OP

What are you suggesting? That they'd just decide to fuck me on a whim, without any persuasion?

Welp, user, therein lies your problem. Work on it.

Don't be ugly as fuck and develop a personality

Why not?
OP wants to fuck and that's what prostitutes do best.

That pussy looks yummy

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Leave the basement and actually go out. Plenty of drunk women at clubs who will go home with anyone at a certain point.

Something like that has only happened to me once in my entire life. I don't have a lot of opportunities to practice.
A 5 is "ugly as fuck". How do average men compete?
I want to fuck, yes, but I want it to mean something. I don't think I could even enjoy it if she doesn't give a shit about me and is just counting down the minutes until she can leave.
Isn't that legally rape though?

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Its always the same

1. Give hope
2. Gain trust
3. Scare her into submission

I think most of what your problem is is that you're putting sex on this big pedastool, whereas if I'm being honest with you, it's kind of overhyped to me, unless you have a deep connection to the person. Sex for me did not feel the empty void of loneliness I felt, but before I had sex it's all I wanted to experience, and then I did, and after awhile I realized that sex, while amazing, is not the end all be all of experiences. But anyways, just don't put sex on a pedastool, treat it like a normal everyday thing, because it truly is. Sex isn't interesting, it's not a "unique" thing, everyone has it. It's no big deal. Don't put so much pressure on yourself to have it and you'll be fine man, but best of luck on your search for it.

Okay, OP, here is what you do. Don't worry, it's a surefire way to have sex without paying for it.

>scout your local parks
>weekday lunch hour works best
>start with those that are a LITTLE out of most people's way, but not too much
>where few people would go in the middle of a weekday, but still connected to paved roads
(you don't want to come back to the office after "lunch" with mud or dust from a dirt road all over your car)
>okay, back to scouting parks
>eventually you'll find one where people will just sit in their cars, seemingly doing nothing
>not just any people, just middle-aged or older men
>you find a parking spot where these other guys can see you
>turn off the ignition
>and JUST SIT IN YOUR CAR
everything else will take care of itself

>and don't worry, OP
>they're ALL "straight"

Go to bars or clubs or if you’re young and u get invited possibly to a house party they’re gold mines. I’ve banged 4 chicks and I’m 18, all of them I got at house parties and all of them were pretty hot definitely better looking than me

That's what makes it so difficult though. For everyone else, it's not a big deal. For everyone else, it's a common experience. I'm 33 and never experienced it. It's hard to feel like I'm even human.

What do you look like user?

?????

Im you. Also 33yo and virgin. Cant make contact. I pay the expenses but when i want hold hands she flees the scene. I hate women now

How now seriously how can i completely strangers hot women i like convince to have immediate sex with me?

Fake it, upsell yourself, be a chad, and make hit up girls at clubs and parties. You'll get thots on you in no time.

>>i have no idea how to respond

are you autistic?

I seriously have no clue what you're talking about. Is there really some sort of underground gay older men sex in the park club? How do you know so much about it? Regardless, that's not really my cup of tea.
Bars and clubs always feel awkward to me. Everyone is in their own little group, and its usually so loud you can't have a conversation anyway.
I'm a slightly below average looking man. Not ugly, but nothing special to look at either. I certainly can't rely on my looks to attract a woman.
I don't hate women. I just hate myself.

What do you look like? How much money? If you are plain ugly and fat and have no dough you better lower your standards. There’s tons of girls just like you out there

It's as easy as being far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like.

Not diagnosed, but I wouldn't be terribly surprised. How should I have responded in that situation?

If you’re average then this is all you. Eye a girl at a bar. Flash a smile at her but don’t stare at her. Just catch her glances. Make her want you and when you catch her looking at you, make the first move. Buy her a drink if you’d like but don’t let her use you

18.
House parties.
Lmao. Come on bro you’re literally at the easiest age to get laid, pussy everywhere, easily. We don’t have “house parties” anymore bruh we’re men now. My best advice to you OP would be to put yourself in a position where you run into a pretty woman. Gym, book store, etc. Ask them out. Start going on dates. Honestly it’s THAT simple. God Speed. Fuck even try tinder. Don’t even have to tell them you’re a virgin either. Just give it a go.

A bit below average looks, but not ugly by any means. 6 figure salary and net worth over half a million. I stupidly followed the advice of "focus on career, and you'll find someone some day". Now I'm a 33 year old virgin with some money. Woohoo.
And I have no standards. If any woman wants to have sex with me, I'm game.

>make her want you
Gee, you make it sound so easy. That's like just deriving the universal theory of quantum gravity real quick. Piece of cake. How the fuck am I supposed to make her want me just through a few seconds of eye contact, especially given I'm just average looking.

>Is there really some sort of underground gay older men sex in the park club?
Yes, with the minor caveats that
(A) they don't think of themselves as gay
(a local police chief told me that virtually all of them are married to women) and
(B) it's not really a club, just this place where anyone can hang out to have sex with other guys

>How do you know so much about it?
Just literally stumbled upon it in different cities where I've lived. Locals not into that scene tend to avoid these gathering spots, but I've moved around a bit for school, grad school, jobs etc. and would just cut through a park sometimes because it seemed the fastest route between points A and B—and voila, there they were.

The last one I just discovered last fall, when I took my 5yo girl to a park we'd been a hundreds of times before during weekends and on summer evenings. but this time, she didn't have school for some reason, so we went to her favorite park on like a monday at noon. boom, there they were. I've been living in this city for 15 years. Never had a clue.

>Regardless, that's not really my cup of tea.
Well, you said you wanted free sex. You didn't specify what kind of sex.

I've never been on a date. How do you ask someone out for one? What are some good things to do on a date?

Im here for you. I want you to put your dick in my vagina then i contract my vagina muscles so that you cant pull out. Then you will be mine forever. Bond for life

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Sure, when and where?

If you’re that desperate just pay bro at your age being a virgin there’s no shame in it

There is plenty of shame though. I'd forever have to live with that, and dodge the question and lie whenever the topic comes up.

Here's the thing: women are attracted to self confidence. Don't have it? Fake it. You're gonna fail. A lot. Just keep trying, not necessarily with the same girl because that's creepy. But the more you try the better you'll get at reading people at noticing the tells that say "hey I wanna fuck this guy". Be confident, don't be a creep and pay attention and you should be fine. Also, don't go straight for the hottest girl in the room. Depending on your standards you might have to lower them. For example, I look like a shaved gorilla. I'm okay with that. Does it mean I'm gonna pull a 10/10 chick? Fuck no! I've accepted that. But I've been married for 8 years and I have 2 kids. It worked for me. What have you got to lose?

>commit rape
>kys right after
>mission accomplished

Well, if I make a move and come off as creepy enough, I'll end up getting shamed or possibly even arrested. Since I have no idea how to make a move, the likelihood of me being accidentally creepy is pretty high.
I wouldn't even try with a 10/10, or anywhere close. All I want is an average woman who's interested in me and is willing to share a sexual experience.

Op follow this basic simply brilliant 3 step tutorial how to get what you wantGive her hope be it wealth jewelry or good life

Then show some humbleness and show her she can trust you while being nice

And finally make the game more rough as soon she is dependant on you

Easy

Just practice making a move on fat girls. Then you'll be comfortable making a move on average girls

Since no other fags are trying to help I will. OP.
Stop being a pussy. The pedestal guy was kinda right in some ways.
Ask for the girls number first, talk a little. Then move your way up to asking for her Snapchat, send her funny pictures and shit. Girls like memes (fact). Once ready ask her out to mini golf or a movie, next date maybe a nice but not too try hard of a dinner. Say “Hey I know this nice pizza place” or whatever. Girls like coffee too. Talk to them about how they’ve been doing, how’s your day been. After that it’ll be easy to make conversation. If the girl agrees to a date you’re pretty much in that means she fucks with you (and will let you fuck). There will be a point when you know she wants to fuck. Maybe one time ask to pick her up for a date that way she’s gonna need you for a ride home. She’ll ask you in I can almost guarantee it. Any more questions I’d be glad to help b/ro.
Sincerely,
user

Don’t pay for sex bro it’s awkward and not how you wanna get laid for your first. You’ll almost always result to just fucking hookers after that cuz it’s easier than using your balls and courage to get laid or even an awesome girlfriend. Lol when I lost my virginity I lied and told the girl I already fucked someone. She found out eventually cuz my stupid ass told her but you don’t have to do that if you don’t want to. (Unless you really like her and she really likes you and you know it won’t affect anything)

Good advice user I respect you (user)

No bitch ever likes nice guys like you described. Lmao you idiot are you a skinny geek?

Best way is

Give hope
Gain trust
Abuse her

I've heard this advice before. Went through a phase in my early 20s where I'd hit on the fattest girls I could find. They all rejected me.
Do 30 year old women still use things like snapchat? I thought people grew out of that after their late teens.
Mini golf sounds like a good idea though. I like the idea of doing an outdoor activity that you can talk about as you play.
So if she agrees on the date you think she's already decided she's interested in sex? Or is she using the date to find that out?

Innie fat girls always have a hidden clit

Or, at least the one fat girl I dated did

My husband isn’t the most attractive person bud. His dick is average too. What attracted me was his demeanor and his presence in a room.

I don't want to lie about it, but given the option I'd just avoid bringing it up. She might be fine with taking my virginity, but she might also think it's weird and call the whole thing off.

I would beat you every day and pimp you out until youre used up, then trash you

That’s where you’re wrong and right lmao no I’m not a skinny geek I weigh 220 and I’m 6’2. Cmon dude I gave pretty good advice for a 33 year old virgin. I lost my virginity at 16 and I’ve now fucked prolly 10 girls @ the age of 23.

Pay for it you fucking twat

Nobody is going to know anything about my dick when we first meet, so that's irrelevant. Demeanor and presence definitely makes sense though.

If she says yes to a date you’re in bro just be yourself I promise it’ll work and if it does I hope you think of user helping ya out

youtube.com/watch?v=r1KOfj6y7FM

Great. Now I just have to find someone to say yes to a date.

Ask however you fucking want. It's a numbers game. If you insist on asking directly fo sex, be ready to get slapped. But some guy actually did that and he found a woman after around 1,000 attempts.

>>she tells me she's feeling horny
>>i have no idea how to respond
Even absolute retards can understand that. I guess you just weren't meant to spread your genes.

I bet he was attractive. I could probably ask 1,000,000 women for sex directly and get slapped 1,000,000 times.

we got a badass here, he can sleep with the easiest to get with people in existence.

I’ll pray for you b/ro. Don’t think too much about it you’ll be alright. Girls in their thirties do use Snapchat and shit because they wanna be “cool” but you can always text her memes too and crack stupid jokes. Just when you get that number don’t be afraid to start the conversation, and don’t text her right away. Make her wait 24hrs. You’ll be good. Also don’t go for fat chicks just mingle man, you’d be surprised what you can pull just by being yourself.

Okay crash course:

Don't grope her on first date.
Don't rape her.
Don't do any variation of "hey wanna fuck?"

That will keep you out of most trouble.

You're gonna have to do some legwork on this. Unless you are gonna wait for the one random chick at a bar who's gonna fuck anything with a pulse. Sex is one of the times where someone is most vulnerable. You're gonna have to get her to trust you. That requires effort and time. Be friendly, not like friendzone status but casual and work your way in, get to know them and make them like you and go from there. Like I said earlier you're gonna fail a lot and get rejected. It takes time and practice. If you want a quick fuck, call a whore.

Il give you the best sentence of your life
"do u want to come over and watch a movie with me?" if she's down she will say yes and if not then she will just say she is really busy or something gentle. easiest line in the world

at first i figured this was gonna go some loli-humping way.
way to think outsdie the box, fag

hit them in the back of the head and then they will do what you want

Right xD

>I could probably ask 1,000,000 women for sex directly and get slapped 1,000,000 times.
Most don't slap. Try it. Go to some outdoor event , rent a hotel room nearby, and ask every woman walking around alone for sex. It will take you all day and it will not be fun. You probably will find a chick that will fuck you. Then you reflect on how embarrassing that was and how you need to nuance. Most guys (non Chads) have to approach a few hundred before they fuck.

OR...
You can join a club and become the best at something and/or become the club leader. The women in the club will flock to you. Doesn't matter what type of club, whether it be French or dog training. Women love leaders, even small-time leaders.

t.non-Chad with high notch count

>How do you ask someone out for one?
Fuck dude, I am high-functioning autistic and even I can get it through my autistic skull. Ask means ask. From autist to autist: try one way and write down your responses. Then try another way of asking and write down your responses. Repeat until you find something that works.

FFS, don't be such a sperg.

Grab them by the pussy

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It's rarely easy to just meet a girl and have sex. You have to know them well enough to want to be your girlfriend. So you have to do something where you interact with girls repeatedly. Once you know some girls well enough someone will want to be your girlfriend/ have sex

This unfortunately does not work

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This sounds like a pretty good one.
Science. I like it. I can eventually publish my findings in the journal of social rejects trying to get laid. It'll be the breakthrough piece of our era.

>can eventually publish my findings
Professors have groupies and fuck them. It's frowned upon if they are students but it's no-holds-barred at seminars.

He never knows until he tries

The only women I know reasonably well are family and coworkers. None of them would be a good idea for a girlfriend, for obvious reasons.
How often do normal people spend out socializing with strangers?

I was supposed to be in university and touring dude. She ruined the tour and my majors

Go to Las Vegas. It's fucking easy. Seriously.

As in finding a hooker, or what? Las Vegas is just a city. Why would it be any easier than in any other city?

Because it's legalish and they are much more brazen about it.

Even strangers isn't a good idea. Go volunteer somewhere. Then you'll see the same girls. Or join a club

PAY FOR A PROSTITUTE

Do you think paying for a prostitute would be a stepping stone towards having normal sex with a regular person? I'd hate to just get stuck paying for prostitutes indefinitely.

just check out rsd

>legallish
in vwgas? no. IN another county in nevada, yes. Brothe\ls are legal. Not in vegas, though

these pussies always look wierd to me
dont they have clits+clithoods?

read niel strauss - the game
it will set you in the mood

please not to be showing these kinds of pictures during ramadan thank

Huh, you're right. The more you know...

Does he go into advice and techniques? I started reading that a while ago and it seemed like more of an autobiography.

Hey, you asked for a way to get laid asap, got you one.

I'd be much more interested in sex with someone who actually wants to have it with me. Fucking a prostitute is just glorified masturbation.

Find a person you could possibly fuck, make sure they are slightly less attractive than you, then act as if they are the hottest thing in the world that you can't stop looking at, thinking about and being near. If you can get that person to laugh, they'll probably be okay with putting their mouth on your crotch junk.

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The important thing is; this does not work if said person is more attractive than you.

I knew a tall, bug-eyed fuckwit who would walk around the club about 1am asking straight out for sex. He would get slapped or pushed away, move along, eventually get something.

Not any kind of admirable course of action and he really was a fuckwit, being tall probably stopped him from getting punched out, but he would have sex. Woo-hoo.

Yep, sounds like he was too dumb to realize there are better ways.

>never scored a pity fuck
>never been there when a super hot girl is sick of her bf and just wants something thick in her suckhole tonight
>never met someone and ended up screwing all night because she mistakenly believed you were something you weren't ie rich, high status, nice to be around
Just smelling clean and being available puts anyone in the game.

His thing was that you didn't need better ways because i think he was a closet homo. A lot of that "Bitches do this and bitches do that..." crap to impress guys, few long term relationships. A lot of these alpha 'pump'n'dump masters are just gay men working their minds out.

OP there's already plenty of good advice in the thread.
Fuck anyone saying to pay a prostitute. Sounds like you wouldn't anyway.
You're overthinking things, for sure. The advice about being confident is right. Girls fucking love that. Same with the leadership stuff.

I don't get how you are pulling in a 6 figure salary and not getting pussy. Women love money. You are going to have to beware of gold diggers, man. Don't go falling in the love with the first pussy you find yourself in (unless you're really sure things are right....) Pussy makes it easy to make bad decisions.

Finally, there's no formula. This isn't going to work the same way every time. I've had a girl fuck me on the second date, I've had some where I had to wait til date 10-12 (most are not willing to wait that long these days, but some women require that and will expect patience).

The advice about volunteering and/or clubs is also right. I have met girlfriends volunteering. There are so few guys that volunteer in their communities and women flock to the guys who actually do.

Just put yourself out there and stop overthinking. Dress in fitting clothes. Buy a nice ass watch for yourself, nice pair of boots or dress shoes, and some dark-washed jeans.

I don't want to just flaunt my money and end up with a gold digger. I'm also not really into the expensive lifestyle. I was brought up pretty modestly, so I don't really see the appeal in fancy restaurants or expensive clothes. I guess there's got to be a happy medium there though.
Confidence is a funny thing. I'm confident in areas where I'm experienced and have demonstrated ability. I'm in a leadership role at work, and I'm confident in that position. When it comes to dating, I have zero confidence because I've had zero success.

Fair. Don't flaunt your money, especially because it's not your personality. But a happy medium for sure.
Okay if you have confidence at work and have a leadership role there, then surely you have skills that would transfer well into a small group setting, club, or volunteering. The point is that you would make female friends that would lead to dates and eventually sex.

Examples -- Do you have a dog? (If not, you could probably afford it, but maybe you don't want one.) You could easily get a puppy and start bringing it to training classes in your area. Also, dog parks

Otherwise -- I'd say find a bar, restaurant, coffee shop, bookstore, whatever -- that's cool in your area, and start becoming a "regular" there.

You’re paying for it one way or another anyway. Whether money, time, or effort.

They're all gold-diggers, they have to be. Just find one that isn't ONLY a gold-digger, who has some empathy. Be aware people act like they want to be seen when they meet you, then reveal who they really are later. You don't know someone until you've had a big argument with them. Under pressure, we show ourselves.

Dishonesty, cruelty, shallowness are red flags.

If you just want sex you can have five women at once on rotation when you have a steady income. If they don't like it, don't call em back and replace that one on the roster. I'm not saying be a selfish bastard, but it's your life, m8.

Thanks, there's some good stuff there. I just hope that you're right, and these guys aren't.