Ex heroin addict here. haven't been clean for long

It originally started when I broke my collarbone snow boarding and the asshole doctors gave me liquid morphine. Fuckin loved it. Then when I was about 20 ALL my friends started using percs and OC so I started to get addicted to those. Then when OC got discontinued we all just switched to heroin cuz it's way cheaper.
My buddy says that but I havnt gone, it's hard cuz I don't know anyone and I'm shy and being sick makes it hard to face the sun let alone people. And I dont understand what people there could POSSIBLY say to make any difference in my life.

I don't understand why you don't just smoke a lot of weed. I would give anything to be able to smoke weed but I value money and my jobs more.

Get a job on a boat like my cousin Russel. Hard to do drugs when you work 16 hour shifts and physically cannot get to drugs (because you are at sea)

m.youtube.com/watch?v=SIQtofOaUYk

Keep yourself busy. You can do it.

I'm in texas and dont know where to get weed without driving to colorado. And if I do that I'll end up getting heroin too.
I work all the time and cant get it unless I drive 12 hours. Doesnt change the fact that I want it 24/7 and will get it next chance I get. Even tho I just want to be clean

The picture is lame, but the advice is the best.

That's the problem. It's so fuckin boring here. I dont have any friends or family. I dont know anyone. There is NOTHING to do. But I feel stuck here. I cant go anywhere near a big city

Ya real heroin is garbage. Black tar is where its at

Don't listen to these dumbasses. Addiction is a symptom of ptsd. If ur not willing to fix your ptsd you should keep using and stfu

Woof the barb is in my lip

Replace the addiction with others. You need an abc 123 list of things to do when you feel like getting high. so many that you can keep doing them. no one is saying you can't have fun, but you know & i know if you do dope the timer goes back to zero on a lot more than just days since last accident. (oh poop. oh fiber. oh temperature regulation & sleep schedule.)

weed will help with sleep & appetite & the emotions all flooding back in yer body without chemical regulators but that can become a problem too.

find your routine that works & keep on modifying it. everything in moderation, especially moderation.

hope you never shot, OP. i was on the H train with straight baltimore shit & had a grand pill connect for green 80 oxys & purple 200 morphines & blue pentagon roxys.

it was glamorous because i survived, but it's the headshake of wasted time you have to accept & live in the present.

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T. Someone who's never been heroin sick and probably never used hard drugs at all

Wat does it mean to get high

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When u alter your state of mind

Just come to Boise and give me all of your heroin. I’ll take it off your hands.

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Been where you are man. Three years off, but honestly? Never gets better. You just learn how to cope without it more I guess. I don't actively crave it day to day, just kinda feels like a piece of me is gone forever. And fuck I get tense if I see somebody shoot up on tv or something

Fuck you if I had some right now id be smokin it

You should get some of this and get high just one last time and then you can stop.

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Longest I've made it is 7 or 8 months

>smokin it
so wasting 90% of it ? fuck you buddy

Chasing the dragon is fun, but I was always a needle man

Ex heroin addict? You are still addicted. I always wonder how someone said:well one time heroin won't make me addicted. I take it! 10 years later everybody still shoots up heroin. Dumb fuck.

Yer an asshole
Read the thread faggot I used to bang but I stopped years ago. Smoking it's the next best way.

Share the love dawg! I need some trails too

>what do b?
Move to pills. And when you do, hook me up with some Adderall. I need about 1000 30mg. Kthx.

so you used to not waste 90% of the heroin you get, but now you do waste 90% of the heroin you get..
ok? cool distinction...

I'm buying if u can get it

Your a moron if u think 90%of it gets wasted. There is no way of using it that wastes 90%

there's 2 actually. smoking and oral.

That’s just not true. Also smoking it seems to be the safer method and still fucks ya up. Banging it is the easiest way to lose everything you have to the shit imo

just don't do it 4Head

You know where to buy heroin but by where to find a little weed?

You know you want to why try and tell yourself anything else?

Four years clean here. Honestly, I don't really think about it. In the four years that I've been clean, there was only one occasion where I actually craved it and seriously considering making a call. My work van broke down on the side of the road. Some dude pulled up behind me and I literally watched him in my rear view mirror tear open a bag, drop a straw in, and sniff it. Then he pulled off and jumped onto the highway. All I could think was "fuck that looks good!"

But I got clean through the least popular method it seems. Methadone. It worked for me. They put me on 60mg and I slowly tapered down until jumping off completely at 4mg. I know everyone says it's a trap and it's worse than heroin and whatever else. But for me it was perfect. Kept the sickness away and the cravings while I got my shit together. Went back to college, graduated, etc.

There's hope for you OP. Don't give up.

so now you're lying to defending your shitty method of use?
it takes a real fool to think smoking heroin will result in destroying their life less than shooting it.

Indont know where to get anything in texas. But I do in colorado and oregon

How bad were the withdrawals once u kicked it at 4mg?

On a scale from 1-10, I would put it at maybe a 3? It was a little uncomfortable which surprised me actually because, fuck, 4 mg? Really? But it was absolutely manageable. Feels like forever ago but if I remember correctly it was like a few achy days and a couple weeks where I would get random hot flashes and chills. But again, absolutely doable. Never at any point did I think "shit this was a mistake I need some dope or methadone to get rid of the sick."

How long were u on methadone. And when u kicked it did you still have heroin cravings?
I have numerous friends who did it this way too but it's nice to hear different opinions

Find positive people. Find a positive environment to be in. Do whatever it takes, move, commit to taking a long drive to a good-quality meeting. Find someone who can look you in the eye and say that they know how hard it is, because they’ve been there. Hopefully you’ll feel a jolt of knowledge that you aren’t alone, there are people who will show you they genuinely care, and you can beat this. Keep shoving and shoving it into your mind that this is 100% true.

There’s a saying that the opposite of addiction isn’t sobriety, it’s connection. I think that’s a bit of an oversimplification, but with 2 years clean, and thinking of the friends that I’ve met (through running, joining exercise groups, and a couple acquaintances from AA), I never ever want to go back to the way it was. Me stuck, sad, lonely, in the same grinding loop of action/reaction/crash, to the point where I didn’t even know what day or date it was. Even if all those friends and activities go away someday, I needed their help these last 2 years to step outside my own head and realize that I’m a real, whole person, and my life isn’t worth wasting. Sending you some positive vibes Yea Forumsro.

>It originally started when I broke my collarbone snow boarding and the asshole doctors gave me liquid morphine.
Was it just in the ambulance and emergency room, or was it longer? I got morphine in the ambulance and ER after I broke my arm once and never really felt anything except a searing pain in my arm.

I was on methadone for about a year, year and a half. At first I still sort of dabbled but it just wasn't worth it. I'd spend $80 on a bundle and then feel stupid because it wouldn't really get my rocks off. Eventually I just stopped buying. And because I stopped buying, my dealers stopped calling me with their new numbers so over time I lost touch with all of them. Then of course I realized how much money I had saved and how good it felt to be productive once again. And from that point on it was just sort of over.

Getting clean for me felt like something that just sort of happened and not something that I really had to work toward. I was required to attend one meeting a month (per the clinic's rules), but I never went to any other meetings or anything like that.

Honestly, methadone really worked for me. But I'm reluctant to recommend it. I believe that there are many, many ways to get clean and what works for one person may not work for another. That being said, if you've already tried everything, I mean, methadone might be worth looking into at least.

I denied it in the ambulance and when I got to the hospital they kept bugging me about it every 5 minutes so I finally gave in so they would shut up. I didnt know I was like 15. I was so fuckin high the rest of the day. Felt great. Then they gave me a script to vic 500s. Ever since then I've craved it. So when I started doing pills it was all over

learn to make healthy stirfry or eggs'n'sweet onions or some shit.

i look at candy icecream fried shit like clown food now. its literal trash. cant eat alot without feeling sick. costs a fuckton. cavities. bad breath. numbs my tongue too so applez taste like paper.

i still eat a lot but its healthy now. gives me energy to exercise and turn it into muscle anyway. when i stooped shit food i learned true flavor of good fruits vegs etc. you sstart to realize that most garbage is just refined sugar or grease fats whatever. start to crave actual flavor of a carrot. of a tomato. a fuckin canteloupe.

also my skin looks better my wallet is heavier my teeth are easier to keep clean, my shits are easy, my hair and nails are stronger. eat for fuel not for taste. the taste will follow.

I'm just against it because I've been suboxone sick before and its fuckin worse then heroin and it lasts FOREVER so I'm scared. I know methadone isnt quite as strong as subs. But they are both worse than heroin

stop thinking about that shit and do other shit. if you think about it yoh are weak. everytime the thought comes in your mind your just being a bitch. be strong. dont do that weak ass shit. do other shit. go run go eat go bang go listen to music but dont ever think about that weak shit. never ever again

Then OD , fuckin tweaker Bahahaha

Also, no, no heroin cravings after kicking methadone except for that one time I mentioned earlier when my work van broke down. That was a real, actual craving. Other times the thought might cross my mind like "hey remember when you used to get high?" but it's such a passing thought and it never turns into what I would consider to be a craving.

So that's 1 craving in 4 years time. Not bad I'd say.

I wish it was that simple

im in a similar position. i feel like all they talk about is 5 stages of addiction. then they do a 12 step program which is ultimately religious BS. is there anything else that can help us?

Do it OP , am waiting 4 u

I consider it more than I care to admitt. I just wanna get high one last time then jump off a fuckin cliff
The longest I've made it in the last 9 years is 7 or 8 months. And I remember the cravings definately wernt as bad and more tolerable. I just need time under my belt but I cant fuckin do it. I'm getting so sick of life. I dont care about being dead anymore. Any time I see the news about someone dying in a car wreck or something I always wish it was me. I'm fuckin over it. That cant be healthy to think that way and have depression/anxiety 100% of the time

Well, again, you have to take into consideration how you approached the treatment and whether or not you took the treatment seriously.

Everyone I know who knocks methadone knocks it because they were still getting high. They'd go to the clinic for a few days, then take a few days off while they get high, then they'd buy a methadone bottle off of someone or get a suboxone from someone, and then they'd go into withdrawal and tell me "fuck that shit it's worse than heroin!" Like... ok? Yeah I guess it is if you use it that way. I'm sure I'd have felt miserable too if I stopped taking it at 60 mg. But I didn't. I tapered down like I was supposed to at a slow and steady pace until I was able to lose it altogether.

So, yeah... the treatment does work when you approach it in that way. Right?

I dont think so. I wish tho

i feel like this user is touching something. its not that we value drugs but the world literally is fucking trash and there is fuck all to do. depression literally being piped into all 5 senser no matter where you go but life could be so fucking easy if dumb wasteful lifestyle didnt create so much meaningless work. shit like people driving 3 miles alone in their SUV to the gas station to get a lighter. fucking american disposable lifestyle. and the quality of xonatruction is fucking patjetic in houses these days. everythings made from toothpicks amd elmers glue.

I hear ya, and that's what methadone did for me. It gave me the time I needed to "break up" with heroin and the junk ball lifestyle -- the dealers, the people you use with, etc.

Once they stopped calling and I started doing other things with my time like reconnecting with old friends and going back to school, sobriety just sort of... happened. Like there it was. That was the time under my belt I needed, and methadone gave that to me and I eventually didn't need the methadone either.

Ya I never did treatment. I just bought subs from people cuz I couldn't stop myself from using heroin and I needed subs for the first few days after heroin so i could work and function. Became a weekly thing. So technically i was kicking both. But subs made it fuckin way worse and it took forever. Atleast with heroin every new day you feel better. Fuckin subs it's like a month of the first day and every new day u cant even really tell if u feel better. It just scared me

I just really wish there was another way cuz I'm almost positive I'd never do methadone treatment. I hate the thought of needing opiates daily again. I'd rather kms

I too have this question. This thread feels like its so relateable. even the food. but especially drugas. pls halp.

I'd try giving methadone a shot. Suboxone didn't work for me either but that's only because I was still using and it was a prescription that I could do whatever I wanted with.....like sell.....for money to buy more heroin with. So that didn't work.

Whereas with methadone, I had to go to the clinic each morning in order to get my dose. It kept me on a schedule, and I liked that. I'd get my dose, and I'd have the rest of the day to go do more productive things.

If I were you, user, I'd give methadone a whirl and really take it seriously. Are you working? Once you've got a thousand dollars in your account, you've gained a little weight, you're looking better and feeling better, reconnecting with old friends... you're going to feel really, really fucking good about yourself.

I still remember that feeling. I was with some friends I hadn't seen in fucking forever, sitting around a firepit at this local brewery we all went to (yeah I still drink occasionally and it doesn't make me want to use but that's probably pretty unusual for someone who is an ex-heroin addict), and I was like "shit I'll buy the next pitcher guys." And I had the fucking money to do it. And I can tell that my friends were just glad to have me back. It went without saying. We've actually never spoken about it. I fell off the face of the earth for years, basically, and now I was back. God it felt good.

That's right you're not using presently, huh? So then you wouldn't even be a candidate for methadone. If you don't piss dirty, they won't give it to you. Hmm...

I mean, I don't know then user. You're in a tough spot.

Im also an ex heroin addict
It doesn’t get better
Just kill yourself now you faggot

Ya I work all the time and I always have money saved. I will never let myself be dopesick like I was coming off needles. But that doesnt stop me from chipping. Which makes it so I'm sick all the time and high for a day here and there.

Tell me about it. I look at death as a relief. That's fuckin sad dude

It might come down to that eventually

Are u fucking serious?

Ya dumbass. My life was totally normal and I was very happy before I got addicted. I just made bad choices cuz I didnt know

What's it like living in denial about everything?

Im not

Don't say that. Because you know that some faggot will read about you in the paper and say, "Good. Another scumbag drug addict off the streets." And I hate those fucking people so much.

I fucking love telling people that I was (and yes I say "was" to differentiate between active addiction and recovery) a heroin addict. It's like, "Really? You?" Because I'm successful now, whatever the fuck "successful" means.

But yeah, yeah me... that was me, stealing, lying, high or sick all the time. And guess what? As conceited a thing as this might be to say, the world would NOT be better off without me. I'm a "contributing member of society" now. I'm good. So they can suck on that.

Same here. I moved 2000 miles away and started over. Best thing I've ever done. Use kratom to stave off withdrawal. You can do it m8

Funny
But dont pretend to be OP you faggot

I hate those people too. People just dont understand. Addiction can turn the best people into garbage.
I moved 2000 miles away also. I'm starting to realize I'm fucked no matter where I go.

Eventually?
Why not now?
Save yourself the years of anguish and hang yourself. Now.
If you were waiting for a sign this is it.
Your a worthless junkie and the world doesnt need you. Do us all a favor and stream it too.

Keep going to meetings and school and don't listen to assholes who don't care

I'm not a junkie u moron read the thread. I'm clean

Hey man, ex crack addict.
I’ve never done heroin, so I can’t make a proper comparison on the addiction, but I’ve been clean for about a year now. It starts out hard, but will eventually get easier to deal with. Try finding things that are relaxing and distracting. For me, I painted miniatures, and that helped.

Don’t give in, man.

Once a junkie always a junkie
You said it yourself your craving it
I bet you would suck a niggers cock right now for a hit
Dont lie. You would wouldn’t you
Fucking worthless junkie kys

>dont lie. You would wouldn't you
Kek. Thanx man that made me laugh.
But no I wouldn't do that.

You obviously dont even know what a junkie is

>People just dont understand. Addiction can turn the best people into garbage.

And they don't understand that there's hope and that we do have the ability to change.

I'd like to think that I'm special and that what I've done is miraculous, but I'm not and it isn't. There are others like me, especially in my profession. No one really advertises that they're an ex-heroin addict, but we're around, right under your nose.

I said earlier that I love telling people I'm an ex-heroin addict, and I do, but I don't wear a t-shirt or anything that advertises it, so unfortunately, no one really sees or hears about the "success stories" as often as they read about the tragedies. And that sucks.

>tl;dr just don't kill yourself my dude. Please.

Im just fucking with ya man im an ex heroin addict clean over 15 years, first few years did it with AA/NA. No other way to do it. Now im a high functioning alcoholic with a great job, got a great education etc. but dead inside. I was kinda hoping you’d hang yourself and stream it for my amusement. Would you?

2 yrs rx fent (10 yrs ago) , 25 yrs pain patient.

You are over the hardest part.
No more withdrawals, Motherfucker!
(Although those wd boners are like being a teenager again, wtf.)

You gotta treat cravings kind of like grief.
And in a way, they really are.
One day at a time, yada yada, but it's true.

Every day clean gets you a little stronger.
The temptation will (maybe/ almost) always be there, but the longer you go without, the easier it will be to live without. Like losing a loved one, as long as you tell yourself the gear is gone for good.

It is a tough fuckin battle, but you're doin great. Relapsed is sometimes part of the recovery process, til you make it out.

It ain't a quick fix (pardon the pun).
Your metabolism was re- wired.

Some ex- addicts can smoke weed, some can't. Feeding kinda killed it for me, but sometimes a little indica helps more sleep. Totally lost my taste for alcohol, never got it back, even when I got clean.

Good luck.

I lost my dad to heroin and it fucking hurts brother. Stay strong and remember people love you.

>food is worse than heroin
smh

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Any record you will ever have will be ruined when you next use
Turns out getting addicted to something is stupid
Play stupid games win stupid prizes

go to NA

This. Love this post. Everyone's journey and path to recovery is different, but the important thing is not to give up.

I don’t love him
In fact im actively going out of my way to convince him to kill himself

At least your withdrawals wouldn't ever kill u, faggot. I have crippling alcoholism, and can't quit cold turkey without the risk of death.

You need opioids to stay well.
It's not like Jonesin for weed.
If you have a pottery good habit you need dope like you need air, more than you need food, sex, or shelter.
That's how it is.

Fentanyl is fifty times stronger, and most eat coat powder is fent. Meaning higher tolerance, greater need...

Fuck getting high, really. It's about getting to baseline functioning.

And IV is a whole nother order. Once you kick, that's a Jones that's like fucking trying to swim to the surface with your lungs bursting.

There's no days off with opioids, one you cross the Rubicon.

If weed does or for you, stick to it. Don't fuck with dope.

Books (not about dope).

This is how I feel about weed

I got hospitalized from heroin withdrawals dickhead if its bad enough it can kill you

OP i hope your seriously considering my proposal that you should kys and stream it

Lol
Facts

Trust me. I'm reading every word in this thread. I've been searching for a way out for far too long. I'll listen to any advice I can. I think I've heard it all tho unfortunately.
Lol stick around my dude I need the laughs

Hey Jonny Mohawk give us back opiophile you motherfuckin piece io shit

Mee too 015231871892 i want friends

Been trying to read it helps for a very short time then I get too bord.

POS

This guy gets it

This is a good thread for ppl who wanna struggle with sobriety for the rest of their lives. Lol

lol

GTFO of Texas.
Good God, man.
49 better states, and even one bigger.

Smoke some weed, run and go to the gym, eat some quality ass food that makes you feel happy and healthy, and most importantly, talk to people who mean something to you.

If the only reason your against texas is cuz your a leftist than fuck off. You are very moronic

Yes. Excellent advice. This will cure him.
Lmao

I dont have access to weed anymore. And it only helps mentally. Which is probably a good enough reason. But it actually makes me feel worse. I feel the best when I'm not on any substances but it's just hard when I dont have any vices to fall back on

Oh and I don't have anyone. All my friends are back in oregon and they all have their own lives and barely talk to me. And I have no family here either. Very lonely

Different poster, bet if you're down to 4mg (or 5 if you can switch from the juice to pills) here's a good way to minimize wds:
If your interval is 4 hrs, start stretching the interval between doses: 4.5 hrs, 5, 6...
When you get up to 8, 10 hours, cut your dose in half, but go back to the original interval. Once you're stable, stretch the interval again.

It's no picnic, but you won't shit yourself, and it's WAY less painful. You can then switch to Norco (use equivalency chart) and continue.

When you're doing 2.5mg hydro every 10 hrs, at a certain point you feel ridiculous and you can just step off.

But you need to be at that point where you really want or need to kick.

I got the same thoughts when i was about 2 years clean at NA. That’s about 4 years into my recovery and a few dozen relapses later. Decided i didnt wanna white knuckle every day and I wanted to be normal. Since then went through a couple of short pain killer dependence episodes, i still like a 2 or 3 beers every night but you couldn’t pay me enough to go back to heroin unless i lost everything like wife and kids died or something like that, id have to be suicidal to go back to it. Havent had heroin in like 20 years. OP on the other hand is in his early days, he’ll suck a dick for a hit right now.

Become one of those people who would never do it. Use religion as an excuse.

Same thing happens to me with sending dick pics. You made progress

Sorry for typo
Fent killedweed for me, not feeding!

You need a hug.
Motherfucker.

Where you get that idea i have no idea, but you're wrong, juicer.

Sorry for your problems, but precipitous withdrawals (from a high tolly) can and do kill.

Ex- drunks are fine, but gimme a junkie over a drunk any day off the week.

But it really is that simple.
>simple doesn't mean easy.

Ok then I wish it was that easy

There are reading techniques that change the experience. Used to read a word or couple at a time. Dude taught me to keep my eyes ahead (If that makes sense), so I could pull in phrases at once.
It made the book more like a dream, or a movie, and I want bored reading anymore.

You might be way smarter than me, but it worked. Novels and stories, especially.

iboga

Not the same.
Just quit weed.
You might have a little Jones but it ain't like you're gonna shit yourself or go into cardiac arrest without it.

Opioids are NOTHING like Weed.

There's Lots of great people in TX, but it is a shit state. You gave two reasons yourself, lol.

You know shit about me or much else:
Your 49 other choices are not all blue.
They are just ALL better than TX.

Even Florida!

>799030673

>It made the book more like a dream, or a movie
I totally agree that's why books are better than movies. But I still get bord with them fast. And reading for too long gives me a head ache. And sitting in one spot for too long makes me feel worse. Fuck me right?

NA Yea Forumsro

trips confirm trip

I do wanna do that. But it's hard cuz I'm shy and I dont know anyone there. And I cant just open up so I would be listening only. When you feel this down it's hard to face the sun let alone people. And I'd have to drive for an hour. Not an excuse tho i know I should. But what the fuck could they possibly say that would help me? That I havnt heard already

Why are you where you are?

I moved cross country three times in my life: Midwest to east coast; back to Midwest; finally to west coast almost 30 yrs ago.

If where you're at sucks (psychically, not just your environment), changing it up can really help.

If you're staying away from OR cause all your old friends use, try a new place.

yeah fuck you, means youre not actaually getting into the story. a good book will make you forget you have a body, you will be in the world being written about wondering what you would do in that character's situation, and thats whn you discover things about yourself, deeper thoughts that make you realise that treating your desire for happiness with drugs is just level one, controlling your own mind and narrative is where the fun starts

Maybe suicide is your answer beta bitch

Moved from oregon to north rural texas. I want to move again but it would be a while before I could

Read that wrong. I chose here cuz someone said they would help me out. And I was stuck in oregon this was my only option. I'm no longer happy here tho. But I feel like I'm gonna be unhappy no matter where I go

Dude I get u and I know this shit. Still doesnt help

Great short stories.
Not a big commitment, get out of your head a bit, stretch, whatnot.

Then maybe another in a different chair.
I agree sitting in one place for too long could be counterproductive.

When I was fresh clean I took a fiction writing class. I want that good, but getting a story down was better than reading, actually. Just can't take the criticism personally. Took me a while to realized I want being judged- -my writing just needed improvement!

It got a little better, but getting that shit off my chest was the best part, and actually made a couple lifelong (well, life since then long) friends.

That's twice I replied to you from my own thread. Fuckin junkies, lol

I've heard good things, but also acid.
Find it hard to believe the NO withdrawals part, though. But last time I did acid was before hydro, oxycodone, morphine, methadone or fentanyl.

Lurking that long for such a weak sauce post.

Don't be so hard on yourself, you'll find your spot. It clearly aint where you are now, but pick a spot with a scene you're into (I mean like music, sports, comics, movies, not open- air markets, lol).

I hope so. I tried moving to colorado but being in a big city I didnt even last 24 hrs before relapsing. Even tho I didnt know anyone. Still didnt stop me

ok, ready for a level up? here you go then

as an entity you are not your your body and therefore not your desires or physical attchements. science interprets it as brainpatterns that you get used to associating with pleasure. that is a physical attchment. it is not you.

people here are essentially describing ways they unconsciously distracted themselves from this attchement, all ways that dont seem to be appealing to you. thats because it rightly isnt the case that any particular activity will distract you from this simple fact that you have wired your brain to tell you youre happy when youre engaging in one particular activity. but you have to realise that and then understand that youve done the hardest part already - made the break for your own good. now you have a clean slate in a new place where you can rewire your brain, and your mind, knowing that neither of those is you. that is your challenge.

>challenge accepted!

post more motivational shits fire yo

I just wish it did more then help for 10 fuckin minutes

Seriously this. AA doesn't just mean alcoholics, it's the principle of the steps. That helped me. That and picking up a guitar and learning it. I'm not good but it was a distraction that I could focus on. I never even plugged it in until way later. Even now, I'm timid about playing out loud but it got me clean. So there's that.

Don't say anything, just listen. One addict helping another is without parallel. Just go and keep going and don't talk to anyone, or talk to someone after the meeting. The program is magical. I was super depressed and I had a lot of anxiety and that has all fallen away. I got 1 year this March in Seattle. I share when I want to. I'm of service, I work the steps with my sponsor, I fellowship. I have been in and out of AA for 9 years, when I got to NA everything changed. You can do it user!

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I just dont understand what people at an NA meeting could possibly say that will help me. That I havnt already heard

just like you excercise a muscle so you excercise another one of you tools, your brain. you do that by ''stretching ' your mind so to speak. drugs are fun becuse they do that for you. but you find that when passionate about dicovering something we can really push our limits of how quickly we absorb information about something.

so find an easy way way of stretching your mind by focusing it on something that will absorb it - thats what you do outise of work, and thats what youre thinking of and planning for while at work. this can be a mental, intellectual persuit, say study of something or a physical pursuit such as gaining proficiency at a skill, craft or a body adrenaline/endorpin rush from a solo or team sport

All these posts are making me consider it. I should. I kinda want to. But its hard

I always just say that I'm allergic or it doesn't agree with me. Most folks just think, "OK, more for me." That's always worked for me from everything from booze to heroin to pot, cocaine, etc...

It always cracked me up when I'd see those anti drug commercials in the Nancy Reagan era of "Just Say No!" Because who pushes drugs on people who don't want them and call them pussies when they say no?

¿pǝɹɐɔs noʎ

do lsd, lsd kicked my meth addiction

Got some stored away for when I'm feeling back to normal. If that ever fuckin happens

Ya but if someone offered it to me I'd be all over it. Fuckin hate myself

I know it's hard user. You won't regret it. Plus if it does work out your misery will be refunded with interest. I'm living in an Oxford House that gave me some accountability, plus the rents cheap. Good luck my friend!

Yeah... I get it. I won't touch the stuff anymore because I'm getting old and scared. I quit smoking tobacco, pot, heroin, etc... a few years ago but I still feel what you're saying. I might still drop acid or shrooms but that's about it, nowadays.

For some reason, the tobacco was the toughest. I still want the magic of that... But I'm afraid of the consequences.

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What do? Stop being a pussy and let the existential crisis play itself out. You'll never feel as good as you did on heroin and that's alright. Life isn't always about enjoyment and suffering is necessary.