Anons, how's life?

Thats never a good thing, get your damn highschool over with. Or be that broke dirty tradesmen i just hired to unclog my shitter at work who leaves beer cans laying around and puts out cigarettes on my wooden deck where my customers eat

>>Kinda happy
>>just my self destructive self
yeah, those are mutually exclusive so no, you are not kinda happy

It's weird. I've been playing guitar on and off for 15 years and never have improved as much as I have in the past month. After not touching it for almost 2 years my hands now cooperate with me. Idk. I feel more centered lately. I've kept up with a workout routine for about 7 months now. I haven't gained or lost any weight but I'm looking more cut and my ribs dont stick out so much. Other than having no release for my balls life is actually ok right now.

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It's ok, not much going on now, I enjoy the quiet.
I've been addicted to drugs since I was 12, I'm 28 now. Got clean when I was 26 because I went to a mental hospital after being homeless in Berlin for half a year. They diagnosed me with paranoid schizophrenia and depression, gave me lots of meds and kept me there for 11 months. I got better, stopped hearing voices, stopped being paranoid, depression got way better. Got sent off to assisted living afterwards, I'm still there today. Got a nice room in a big house, sharing the house with 5 other doomers that keep to themselves. I've lost contact with most my friends because the place I live in now is almost a 3 hours drive from home. Got no real social interaction going on, no gf, still a virgin. But it doesn't bother me, like I said before it's ok now, and I enjoy the quiet.

Meh. Starting a new job Monday which is more money, more sociable hours, weekends, bank holidays off but I kind of just want to fucking run away and never seen any family or friends again.

My curses are blessings. I am infinitely blessed.

Things are mostly okay, OP.

But the same issue still persists.

I have small pp syndrome.

do you have the feeling that friends of you made you sick? were they pushing you to take drugs/ make other things?
were they saying things opposite to the reality?

Why the FUCK haven't you joined this server yet?
discord.link/7RVqurQ

I-h6c

Not really, they've been pretty straight and it was mostly me that got us into trying new drugs. They've smoked weed before and maybe tried some mdma but I've pushed us further, always looking for a new or better high. They're basically good people, sure they got issues but they're not as fucked up as I am, or was. I kinda miss some of them, some not so much. The thing is that my little brother (24) also got involved with the crew and is now living with them, 4 of them bought a big house where everyone can chill out. They're still doing a lot of drugs and I'm worried for my brother, but thats kinda on me

I feel miserable. And I feel like my life is going nowhere and I feel so alone.

You know... it’s going. Going on vacay to Orlando in 2 days, then moving into a new apartment in downtown Indy when I get back! So it’s kind of like the elevator business... you know, it’s got it’s up’s and down’s...

Here, have some In & Out tiddys, user!

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Every day is a new day. Don’t like it, toss it away and move on to the next opertunity!!

youtube.com/watch?v=gL1audHUKtc

You're not alone

if youre really worried, show him the that there are other ways. even if youre in the claw of a crew...

Been playing for 16 years myself. I actually just financed a really nice telecaster last week. Been playing the same battered stratocaster for like 10 years

Sooooo it turns out when i get bored enough of life I have the equivalent of a overpowered tantrum. I go to sleep out of this bordem have some wicked dreams and wake up in a hospital, no drugs involved.

They say its seizures but they have ni clue as to whats causeing it. From my perspective its obvious, since it use to be migraines when i was a kid and i was sick of life, now its just a more powerful version.

Fun shit though, and i would go on disability live a super comfy life, but i know to many people to stop working

I tried but he doesn't really listen to me, I'm not really someone he looks up to anymore, he has seen me reach rock bottom, that kinda ruined it all. But I think he'll come around sooner or later, he just has to try some things for himself right now and just have fun for the moment, I can understand that.

why you self destructive?

Man I've been where you've been. Addiction is a bitch. It's some pretty fucked up shit to see upclose.

I did dated an addict. I learned one thing. Don't. Some people just have it in them, like to change, to want better. And some don't. Sad stuff. But happy you made it out alive. Keep walking forward brother.

> i know i'm barely dealing with anything compared to what some people go through

Dude why to compare your shitty situation with other's shitty situation then? When you weight two shits, that exactly what you get - two shits.

Yea Forums is fun until it's not

I'm like juggling undiagnosed mood swings, but on my way of getting better.

Good for you. Jobs are like girls. Never be afraid to lose one and never be afraid to find new one. Hope it works out for you fine.

thanks m'lorde!

(cont.)

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are you me?

good pic have more?

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close trips

what's holding you back?

Small dicks are good for anal.

thanks for the tiddys have threefiddy

HOLY FUCK what are you doing? Like running around naked and shit?

zomg please tell me you have a sauce on this!

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Nah just flailing like a madman screaming yelling and sometimes ignoring breathing. Muscles vibrate so bad im sore for a few days after.
EEG, MRI, consulting, nobodies got a clue, but once again from my perspective i get a break off work, stay in bed all day for like a week, free hospital meals and i hsve a strong laptop so it works as vacation. Plus the dreams feel like months, woke up the first time not recognizing my name. Also my brain drops a bunch of data, all tastes, smells are like i never had them before

No. Been looking

What are your dreams like? Do you remember anything? How they are wicked?

Dealing with anxiety. Things bother me more than they should and eventually it gets overwhelming. Hard to keep a job. Gonna try meds (celexa and abilify)

Hope it will get better for you. I'm doing some therapy, seems to be somewhat working.

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