Ask a psychologist anything. Preferably not long posts about you asking for a long analysis, though if the answer expected of me is short, write away.
Loaded questions and ebinz trollage might be ignored. If you are respectful, so will I be. The fact that we're on Yea Forums doesn't matter to me and doesn't dictate my behaviour. Poster beware.
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What area in psychology? Personality? Social?
I had sex with my LCSW.
Should I report her?
I'm a therapist, I specialise in therapy and psychopathologies.
What is LCSW?
What country?
Europe is most I will disclose.
Are you Elizabeth Debicki?
No, but I look like her a lot.
Wanna fuck?
Doing masters in counselling psych myself. I have never written any papers or done any presentations. Will this bite me in the butt when I start my own clinic? I just want to counsel people and not have to find some obscure topic that hasn't already been done like "lustre of penguin coats and how they affect the psyche of antarctic fishermen"
Also, I'd like any tips that you have gained as a psychologist in counselling people.
if your patient starts googling their own symptoms, do you get upset?
I constantly think about killing myself and have since I was young. I have motivation to achieve anything.
How do I fix myself
I'm confused. How do you even pass Bachelor level without doing papers?
Why would I? It means they're invested in understanding themselves, it's a great thing. I would guide them about the symptoms, as this can be tricky and unless you know the various conditions, you might pick the wrong one for yourself; estimating the symptoms is done more easily when you have experience as to what they mean.
I never get upset at my patients.
What is your take on Yea Forums?
You don't you just have to learn to deal with it.
show dick
Seek therapy, if you can. There is likely a lot of work to be done. You suffer from depression, at the very least, but that's just the surface.
Mostly made of autists, psychopaths, and other mentally ill people, as well as a fraction of genuinely curious people who come here because of the content. Also a serious amount of underage users.
My opinion is much worse today than it used to be. Yea Forums was truly better 5 years ago. And better still 8 years ago.
Is depression treatable without going on drugs that make life even more miserable?
Are you more dynamic or behaviorist in your approach to therapy? If dynamic, do you follow any particular school? Any thoughts of becoming a psychoanalyst?
It's a distance edu thing that only has case studies instead of doing papers. It's complex and country specific but I had to do college the distance education way because of a number of personal factors.
Yes. In fact, for anything but extreme depression, medication is only efficient 1 out of 20 times, and with severe depression, 1 out of 4, so clearly, medication isn't the best way.
Cover the basics and you will have achieved much:
1. friends
2. family
3. a partner
4. a job you like
5. good hygiene and exercising, working out
6. all the sex you need (same as "partner)
7. no major worries
8. dreams and projects
If you have all these, your chances of suffering from depression are reduced drastically.
How do I finally kick my drinking problem? Please don't say AA
>Are you more dynamic or behaviorist in your approach to therapy?
I mostly rely on cognitive-behaviorist principles, but that's just the core. I adapt to every patient's actual needs. I never dreamed of becoming a psychoanalyst. I do psychoanalysis as a party trick, though. "Yep, you haven't reached fully anality yet, but if you stop fantasising about destroying items with your asshole, you might become a true master of the butt."
I think I need to get working on some of these lol
I see. It shouldn't bother you much: writing papers and doing presentations isn't part of doing therapy, typically. If people naturally tend to confide in you and trust you about deep stuff, you'll be fine.
Why do I have a pantyhose fetish?
Nice try. The majority of depressed people or clinical depressed can't maintaine half of this list which isolates them even more and increases their symptoms. But thank you for the short answer.
I don't actually like AA and think they're weird and sectarian. Your best bet: find the true problem behind the addiction. It's not alcoholism, it's you using alcohol to escape something, to avoid facing something, to feel better about something that makes you feel bad, etc. It could be anything, but don't focus on the drinking.
Because it's hot and you need sex.
FTFY
I didn't say it was easily done, just that these are the basics of a happy life, and without these, you are likely to become depressed fairly quickly.
I can’t have sex with a pantyhose
Do you think suicide is ever the right option for someone who isn’t terminally ill?
Anyone who posts is "seeking attention" to some degree. There's nothing wrong with that. Do you struggle with imposing yourself in a social group and think nobody ever should?
I don't. Suicide, when it is the result of depression, is never the right option. It's like assuming that you will never walk again because you are too drunk to stand. Depression is the same in this regard: you will not be depressive forever. So no, suicide is never right when it's from mental illness.
I'm 93% sure im borderline or at least have some kind of major depression/social anxiety disorder because of various things that are fucked up about my mindset and previous psych classes ive had. But even while being closer and closer to the verge of breakdown, harming myself which i told myself id never do again in the past, and ruining so many opportunities and relationships in my life with people i truly love but end up pushing away because of how i act and think, im still scared to get help before i go to college in a few months because im scared a diagnosis will just fuck things up in the long run, own self doubt, and the belief that therapy won't work
How stupid am i?
Would being diagnosed cause problems with employers/peers in long run?
Any suggestions?
I don't need a college degree for that. So still thank you for trying fellow therapy user. Funfact: different branch, but I get angry about my clients. They are mostly grown up babys.
Depending on where you live, medical secrecy should be a thing. Don't fear diagnoses, whatever your problem is, it's there whether it's diagnosed or not.
You aren't stupid. If you've done some research and found a potential explanation, you're already much ahead of the pack and have reason to be optimistic.
If I were you, I would seek help before I get worse. Employers and peers should not know anything about your medical condition. It's private stuff.
Well I started drinking daily after I lost the love of my life
I don't even miss her anymore, it's been 5 years now, I'm just not happy with my job, my living situation, or anything really in my life. Like you said drinking helps me turn off my brain and ignore all these things
I just don't know what's going to make me happy, I haven't been anywhere near content since December 2014
>They are mostly grown up babys.
Emotional maturity hasn't be achieved by many. Some still have steps to take, help them if you can.
Is Chie best girl?
Good answer. Godspeed to you!
Thanks for answering. I got insecure because I was googling my symptoms when I first started treatment and I got kind of embarrassed when he found out. I told him I thought it was Schizoid Personality Disorder and he had this look on his face like he was both flabbergasted, and annoyed, that I did it. I stopped googling because I was worried I wouldn't be able to present authentically but I worry that I might've sabotaged my own treatment by the power of suggestion, with symptoms I might glamorize without actually having in some way.
He's very firmly settled on his diagnosis though, which is a relief. I hope I gave him the right information though.
I'm 30. 4 years ago I came in my 89 year old neighbours arse. Sucked the come out after. Analyse me you cunt.
There you go. Consider the possibility that maybe you still miss her on some level.
Here's what's going to make you happy:
>a job you like
>a better living situation
Your brain adapted to a subpar condition and that makes everything a thousand times more difficult. Living when nothing is enjoyable is both torture and a feat.
Consider taking small, or bigger, steps towards what seems objectively a good idea. Your condition should improve with it.
I honestly don't know her.
m.youtube.com
Do you like trap beats?
This is crap.
I have
10 or so very close friends, countless trusted not as close friends
The single greatest fucking son ever born
A baby momma that has my back
A job that both challenges me and lets me slack as needed
A little pudge but I’m active
Sex on demand
No major worries
Hopes, dreams, plans and ACTIONS towards those things.
And I still want to die multiple times a day. Because I have depression, thats how it works and its outright dangerous to give people in my boat unrealistic expectations about lifestyle changes making fuck all of a difference.
What does work is mindfulness. Be aware of your thoughts and where they come from and learn to recognize which thoughts are garbage. Get some peace of mind where you can and don’t think that everything is your responsibility.
Hey are you the same guy that answered my attachment question via Vocaroo?
Not OP, but generally it's not the best option. I understand why someone would think that though, and I think people should take more responsibility to ensure nobody reaches that point though.
hypothetically of course, have you ever slept with a patient of yours? or one of their immediate family members?
>he had this look on his face like he was both flabbergasted, and annoyed,
If that really was his reaction, I wonder why. Schizoid is fairly specific a condition, so if it seems plausible to you, that would be very useful information to him. I do not understand his reaction, insofar as it really was how he reacted, and not you projecting your fear of how he would react.
What's his firmly settled diagnosis?
Any experience with depersonalization/derealization? I quit drinking 4 months ago after a 3 year depressive binge and I feel like the panic attacks from withdrawals broke my brain. It's like I've been stuck in a terrible dream
does crossdressing or trans fetishism indicate anything wrong with the person or is it considered mostly harmless?
>I'm 30. 4 years ago I came in my 89 year old neighbours arse. Sucked the come out after. Analyse me you cunt.
Clinically speaking, you are what we call a disgusting bastard.
Thoughts on acrotomophiliacs?
How can I motivate myself to work?
I'll bite OP;
im a trans woman (hrt 1.5 years) who has developed agoraphobia due to anxiety caused by a fear of people giving me weird looks.
I rarely leave my house anymore, and when i do, i feel extremely on edge and paranoid; how can i better myself and go back to my non-agrophobic self?
>This is crap.
Depression doesn't work the same for everyone, and doesn't have the same origin either. In your case, your wish to die may not be as intense as you think, or, if you actually feel depressed, you may have a more "mechanical" source of depression, in which case medication might work better than therapy.
This doesn't sound like you recognize those things. Just that you list them in an attempt to beat yourself up over why you still feel depressed. It's a place to start, the list they provided. That's why they included th ephrase, "medication doesn't always work". In cases like yours, it probably would because nothing else
>listed
has.
tl;dr treatment is an activity to participate in, not a bandage to slap on the problem. you have to actively work the program and TRY to get better. not wallow in this self pity cycle.
(Yes, but don't tell anyone.)
Im back in school as of last summer, would love to find a different job but the pay is better than anywhere else I'd likely be able to get a job at, and the health insurance is probably the best in the country
I'm no really in a position to change departments either because of seniority bullshit that I need to be able to alter my work schedule to adhere to my school schedule.
I feel very stuck, and feel I have no control over the vast majority of things, and will likely be miserable for the foreseeable future
No, never, and I never will.
Can you read my mind?
Like it or not, you were born a man and likley have masculine characteristics. It's typical of trans people to revolve their life around their looks. The only real solution to your problems is to get more attractive. Plastic surgery, working out, makeup, etc.
Yes, personal experience. Spent over 6 months in a derealised state, and also have more intense episodes of that due to traumatic events.
Your best bet is to remember this will pass, and treat your brain. Good diet, hygiene, mindfulness exercises (literally anything, even dishwashing by hand), working out, walking in forests, etc.
Derealisation is this: when you suffer anxiety for long enough, or intensely enough, your brain has a mechanism with which it "disconnects" from the stress, making you feel a million miles away from everything, numb, and remote. It's literal hell in my experience and it's nightmarish as can be. Like being drunk permanently and not being sure you will ever sober up again.
>not you projecting your fear of how he would react.
He said that's what it was, that I misread his "non-verbal cues" as he calls them. He says most of our interactions happen in those rather than what's actually said. He says that I speak more with those than I do with words, which I guess is true but...I mean we're locked in a small room together, the door isn't locked (so he says), but yknow....not noticing those things might be the difference between "I'm safe" and "I'm in physical danger right now".
He was circling around Borderline Personality (which does run in my family so it's not so radical), but now he thinks its PTSD but the long term one. I thought it was schizoid because...well, my god that's such a long story and I doubt you'd be interested.
The question is: is there any damage from it? If not, then it is harmless.
Possibly they like the idea of being useful to others, possibly because of insecurities about their own intrinsic value.
Been taking .5 mg kpin for two months. How fucked am I? Can I just stop?
1. find any fun possible in the work to be done
2. focus on why you do this work, what the goal is, and how good it will be
3. plan your work: break it down into easily manageable parts; choose a time to do that work and once it's done, stop; respect your plan, make sure your plan is feasible
4. plan a reward for once your bit of work is done
Hey fuck nigga I axed you a question
What kind of person would someone become if he grew up on Yea Forums with no parental advisory?
Like hookers and cocaine?
Nah, I recognize them. My list was a response to your list. Also, I’m unmedicated.
Yes, my point was also that treatment is ongoing. The point you missed was that taking up jogging and having friends are NOT treatment.
therapy that teaches mindfulness and awareness is treatment. Meds as directed are treatment. The shit you listed is dangerous. Not everyone can have all the sex they want and lots of people having the most sex are miserable.
A faggot
Using Ritalin and Red bull for smashing exams but Ritalin makes me horny. Suggestions, OP?
Not OP. You could easily take half of what you take now for a week and then just quit. In a month of time you wont feel any bad effects from quitting.
Fuck someone/thing
Have you ever done anal ,op?
So just take a half a pill for a week and jump?
>The point you missed was that taking up jogging and having friends are NOT treatment.
No the point you're missing is that it very firmly is, which is why every therapist I've ever had recommends starting with that list first. You are not a medical professional, and you're very obviously not in treatment. So you won't know better than me, an experienced patient, or OP, an experienced psychologist. Techniques that teach mindfulness, when properly executed, teach you to be grateful for those things and to find joy in the process of recognizing them. And praising yourself for your accomplishments rather than listing them passive aggressively on Yea Forums to prove how "well adjusted" you are yet "nothing works". That's a cop out for continuing to NOT do the work required in treatment. You're in denial and getting defensive.
But I want to study not waste my time chasing chicks
I imagine there's a strong connection between being trans and your agoraphobia; you must feel like an impostor that everyone looks at and tries to spot, or spots. That sure can't help your agoraphobia.
Is there anyway for you to go back to being a man again? I mean physically?
I think we should start there and tackle the agoraphobia later on.
I'm horny as fuck, send me a picture of you with a thumb up your arse.
0.5mg is really low if it was me i would just quit cold turkey right away. It would be different if you were on 3-5 mg dose or had epilepsy.
OP approves of this post.
Perhaps choosing a different path, even if it makes less money, would make you feel empowered and free. It's worth trying. There's no point in making more money if you become miserable in the process.
OP doesn't approve of this post.
The worst part is that this is true.
>He said that's what it was, that I misread his "non-verbal cues" as he calls them.
It's very possible, user. That's the first thing that came to my mind. There's a very high chance he is telling you the truth and didn't react negatively.
>I mean we're locked in a small room together, the door isn't locked (so he says)
user, the door is certainly not locked. In doubt, go and open the door. I think you are paranoid (I'm not criticising you, though, only making you aware) and should keep this parameter in mind. The world is not as scary as you think/feel, don't forget that.
>and I doubt you'd be interested.
I literally spend my life studying this. I am interested. I love humans and want to help them. That's why I'm here. Go right ahead.
/zGqqyVq
Hello my troubled friends, are you searching for an true ACTIVE discord server to hang out and make friends?
Where the mods aren't power hungry?
Look no more!
We have MEMES, tons of LEWDS, a selfie channel, comfy channel, lots of E-Girls (Traps/Femboys too!).
More like a snickers and cool aid.
My parents divorced when I was 3 years old and I've never seen what a healthy relationship looks like.
How fucked am I OP?
Study well and be ready. Work out and take a walk.
I have not.
I'm a suicidal teen since i can remember, years went by and i start to see that my emotions are fading away... I'm an Alcoholic,drug addict... I took whatever i could, pills and other shit i have no clue about. I smoke since 12 years old and 6 with no stopping. I tried a psychologist but i feel worse now... I'm not depressed but i fucking wish to die since i don't get shit from life, no enjoyment. What should i do...?
>No the point you're missing is that it very firmly is,
This.
t. OP
This is a based user. 10/10
Post more.
t. OP
You aren't fucked. You can learn what a healthy relationship is like, you can imagine it. Apply symmetry. If you can tell what was wrong between your parents, you can learn what a good relationship is.
>I tried a psychologist but i feel worse now...
Often, when you open that stuff up, you will feel worse for a while, but it's a good sign. It's not easy dealing with all this, just like an operation requires cutting you up, and you often feel like shit afterwards, but that's how you remove tumors.
>I'm not depressed but i fucking wish to die since i don't get shit from life,
You are depressed, very much so. Wishing to die is the lowest level of depression.
You should consider the list I posted above, and get back in therapy if you can. You should also quit alcohol and the rest, as those make your brain more unstable and less likely to stand on its own when it comes to mood regulation.
(Brain is "lazy", and if you give it good feels artificially, it will stop doing the work itself, which is why heroin addicts suffer immense pain when they stop, because their brain no longer delivers the goods naturally.)
Thanks
Do you agree that psychotherapy is mostly bullshit when it comes to helping with PTSD?
That sounds boring and gay
>Be me
>Nearly 20
>Treated like a outcast by most because of language barrier, I do know the language but I'm not fluent in it
>Getting devoid of social interactions
>Rarely ever speak to people, but if so, I could go on for hours
>The lack of talking to people is taking a toll on me, I'm having problems in speech
>Cannot judge what's right and What might hurt the person in front of me
>Few friends and almost no interaction with them
>I started talking to myself few days ago to keep the speech impairment from going worse
>Depressed
>No suicidal thoughts or any tendencies
>My will to live is all on hopes
Otherwise I look fine to others
I just masturbated and I am a boy. So
Under what circumstances is ending a marriage the right thing to do? I'm talking normal reasons, not horrible abuse, a lot of infidelity or anything extreme.
i'm happier being trans than being a man honestly, i can't and won't go back, in essence i 'killed' my old self. I feel less like an impostor, more like a curiosity to other people
Of course not. Psychotherapy is efficient against PTSD. I don't know anything else that could help this specific problem. Are you asking for a friend?
Thank you, i just feel like drugs are all i have... I don't have memories of my chilhood and i can't underdtand how it feels to feel something and it makes me just don't give a fuck about anything... I don't care to go back to therapy because i get bored and just stop going. My family hates me and i'm going to a drug addicts/criminals correnction bullshit for a long time... I just can't care about anything and i don't feel bad about it...
Talking to yourself is a good coping mechanism, user, and it will help with the speech. I did this a lot when I was a child, because I was alone and had nobody to talk to. Don't feel crazy for it, it's extremely healthy to do.
Do watch movies and interviews with actors, those typically express themselves a lot and are easy to "read". Consider it training and practicing.
You should also consider getting a pet if you like animals. It would help.
No, asking for myself. I have found that nothing really helps. I am considering ayahuasca or an Ibogaine trip
>Under what circumstances is ending a marriage the right thing to do?
The very fact that you are wondering suggests ending the marriage already is the right thing to do. When you are with the right one, you don't wonder about that.
More generally, if you don't feel happy or content, that means something is lacking. Likely, things are much worse than you realise for now.
>i'm happier being trans than being a man honestly,
But are you? The way you describe it, it seems worse than before, to the point where you can barely go outside now.
I just wanked off over the thought of you.
Tell me what the trauma is.
My gf died in a regrettable train explosion
27 months of moving back and fourth between Iraq and Afghanistan, Taking many lives more than I like to remember
Oh shit... War...just ignorant war...
Seeing someone to help you grieve would be a good idea. You'll be going through several stages, in no specific order, and being accompanied on this path would be good.
This, however, isn't PTSD, unless you can't enter trains anymore or something of the sort.
Hey,
I finished my bachelor's in electrical engineering last year and am now in my first year of the master's program. I'm also the student representative of my semester and the whole study program and have been working part time at the university throughout my whole studies. Needless to say it has been a quite stressfull time until now. Middle of March the first master semester had ended and suddenly my workload dropped from 120% to almost nothing to do. Since then I felt kind of empty, wasn't even motivated to do some leisure activities. All I've been doing in the last weeks is basically come home after classes, play video games and be angry about everything because I'm so short-tempered suddenly. The new semester is now catching up pace and I can't motivate myself to do anything productive, and if I do it makes me angry and I lose focus quickly.
I know that I've been pushing myself too hard through the last years and I'm already going to resign from my student representatives job, but still, until now I was in such a nice workflow that even though it was a lot, I could complete everything within deadlines with still time to spare. And I enjoyed that work. But now all I can think of is taking a very long vacation and not giving a shit about my studies, which worries me because I'm actually aiming for a PhD and I love my field of study.
Could that be the first signs of a burnout or a depression?
Maybe I should also mention that I have a few good friends which I meet regularly and enjoy being with and I also have a great, understanding girlfriend that supports me in any way she can. Still I can't get all those negative thoughts out of my head.
>didn't react negatively.
I hope you're both right. It feels like in a clinical setting, most of my defense mechanisms kind of fall apart. But feeling vulnerable is usually what puts them back up again. Some kind of weird cycle.
>In doubt, go and open the door.
I think I might start, at this rate. He told me that no one will come in, and if they do they'll knock first. And one time I overstayed our appointment and the co-workers actually did knock beforehand. So far so good but I'd be lying if I said I was totally fine with being confined in a space with someone I'm obligated to tell the truth to. I didn't tell the truth this whole time for mostly this specific reason. The therapist would've told my mother like they did last time and that night was really fucking rough for me. They're either telling her, or telling her that I need to go inpatient. Which she's all too happy to oblige since she won't have to "deal with my shit" for a brief time.
>Go right ahead.
The shortest version relies on what he calls "big T" and "little T". He says that it sounds like my childhood is filled with a bunch of little Ts, and punctuated by Big Ts every now and then. All events that I never actually..."faced up" to, I guess? Ones that I repressed basically. There was a Big T event in 2012, and ever since then I've been a different person. Literally. I don't think and feel the same way, I don't remember the same things, I just became someone else in that moment. "This isn't happening, this isn't real, this is not me" over and over again in that moment. Now, my sisters try to reach out with personal stories of me as a kid that I just flat out don't remember. It feels like they happened to someone else entirely. My life "started" in 2012, when I was 22. Everything before that is a weird foggy haze. I'm still struggling with my pronouns though. Last year, "I" became "we" and I can't shake it. "We" think ___, "we want this", etc.
Again. I only put the list to demonstrate that I had those things as part of my point that they are not enough and dont count as therapy.
Me, personally, I appreciate your concern but I’m in real therapy sessions bi-weekly and doing fine, even with the occasional imp of the perverse whispering in my ear, I’m ready. I’ve prepared myself for my lows and my support structure is good.
You on the other hand can live with the fact that some kid is going to read your shit tier advice and off themself because your shit checklist is out of their reach and they’ll come to the conclusion that they cant be happy because they cant get laid, or their family is toxic and part of the problem, or the same thing as the last point only its their friends that are toxic. Be it on your head.
I dont really know what it is, except that I get flashbacks and dreams and they are getting worse, I have been taking something called Kratom and it seems to help a little.
You a guy or girl?
So why am I obsessed with cumming or wanting to cum on a girls face?
Kratom is good hahaha
Its helping.
>Could that be the first signs of a burnout or a depression?
It could. Is it possible for you to take a sabbathical? Perhaps taking a year off is what you need. Perhaps, also, you just need a readjustment time before getting back to work.
That said, I think your own intuitions here are the best clues. Trust yourself, you sound very insightful about your own issues.
My trust in people has been severely damaged this past year, i didn't have agrophobia until about 9 months ago. i'm 23 but i've been transitioning since i turned 19, so i sorta grew used to weird looks from strangers, hormones 1.5years (the uk health system makes you transition pre-hormones, its pretty brutal cause they wont pay for laser till you start hormones)
I have delusions of grandeur and I’m constantly over analyzing everything. Could I get medicated for that?
I hoped to find some help here.... hahahaha guys stay safe... Stay strong
What, in your expert opinion, are the best ways to deal with moderate depression without taking antidepressants?
>It feels like in a clinical setting, most of my defense mechanisms kind of fall apart. But feeling vulnerable is usually what puts them back up again. Some kind of weird cycle.
Understandably. Remember these people are there to help you, and you have nothing to fear. Learn to let go. You can trust others more than you realise for now. You will be OK.
>I think I might start, at this rate. He told me that no one will come in, and if they do they'll knock first. And one time I overstayed our appointment and the co-workers actually did knock beforehand.
Reality checks out. Feel free to test it whenever, you will be reassured.
>So far so good but I'd be lying if I said I was totally fine with being confined in a space with someone I'm obligated to tell the truth to.
You aren't obligated. You can say you don't feel comfortable about talking about something and he won't force you. You don't even have to lie, you can just say you aren't OK with this or that topic. Your therapist will not force you. Especially since he knows you are on the defensive, he would not do anything to confirm your fears (and generally, therapists never force anything out of you, to preserve trust and respect).
>The therapist would've told my mother like they did last time and that night was really fucking rough for me. They're either telling her, or telling her that I need to go inpatient. Which she's all too happy to oblige since she won't have to "deal with my shit" for a brief time.
Tell him about this. If you can't trust your therapist, it's fucked. But you can.
>I don't think and feel the same way, I don't remember the same things, I just became someone else in that moment. "This isn't happening, this isn't real, this is not me" over and over again in that moment.
I feel you. I know exactly what that feels like. Though probably not the way you feel it; look up DID, this may shed some light on your issues.
Thanks for the feedback. I can see what you're saying. I've scheduled myself for some therapy in the next few days to talk about this a bit more.
I'm a bit afraid to approach my spouse about our issues, though. I feel like once the can of worms is open, there will just be an acknowledgement of the issues and we'll be through.
>So why am I obsessed with cumming or wanting to cum on a girls face?
Tentative explanation: you long for acceptance, of yourself, your own pleasure, your orgasms, and being accepted this way is a huge turn on, because it is the ultimate acceptance of your being, to receive your liquid orgasm on one's face.
Let me know what you think.
Thats the right answer buddy. Find you a safe place to talk it through. You got this.
How can I stop thinking about ways to kill people who have wronged me?
I can't seem to get out of bed, I don't have motivation to try and do anything, I sleep at least 12h a day. What should I do?
What are your personal feelings on borderline personality disorder/ emotionally unstable personality disorder, their chronic self harm and suicide risk, and professionals hospitalising/institutionalising them out of fear, when it doesn't reduce the risk of self harm or suicide.
Meds aren't your best bet for this. Give me some examples of these symptoms.
The list I posted before.
Do you genuinely care about all your patients well being?
>I'm a bit afraid to approach my spouse about our issues, though. I feel like once the can of worms is open, there will just be an acknowledgement of the issues and we'll be through.
Your intuition is probably right on the money, but this too should be a strong indication that the problem is deeply rooted. It's not easy ending things, and beginning others. I wish you all the best and a lot of courage. You are brave.
By trying to see things from their point of view; perhaps they weren't trying to wrong you. If they have, remember that you aren't responsible for their behaviour. It's on them. If someone did you a bad one, don't lower yourself to their level, stay noble and let them behave like crap if they want. Don't let the negativity infect you.
>Especially since he knows you are on the defensive, he would not do anything to confirm your fears (and generally, therapists never force anything out of you, to preserve trust and respect).
He definitely doesn't force me but that's the frustrating part. It feels like I'm going in circles here, without seeing any kind of progress. I want to get it all out, to get it over with. I want all of this to be done. It hurts and I'm scared. But he keeps saying "all in your own time" and somehow I interpret that as "inaction is your fault". Doesn't check out but feels more like irrational paranoia.
>If you can't trust your therapist, it's fucked. But you can
Its not...I mean, I recognize that it's just a bias from a previous therapist right? But its weird how you can know that its not this therapist, just therapists in general that I don't trust, and still continue to not trust them. I should be able to get past it right? It sucks.
>look up DID
I did for a time, but I'm not sure why he ruled it out. I'm not sure why a lot of diagnoses got ruled out to be honest. But he says that if I'm not transitioning into a different identity, with its own name and thoughts etc, then DID is unlikely. And I'm not really, kind of? I don't know anymore. I don't black out or lose chunks of time. He says this pattern is common in PTSD too but none of the cases I've read about at least. That's why I thought schizoid at first, split and forming my own reality.
Sleep less. 12 hours a day would be indicative of severe depression. See the above list, but get moving as soon as you can. Go for walks, run, swim, anything at all, but get moving at all cost. Even simple chores or tasks will make a difference. If you like music, take some you like, not sad music, and go walk in a forest or some natural place you enjoy. Do it.
That's pretty awful advice. An intelligent person is capable of entertaining all options even though they may not actually consider following through.
Not OP but...
Some therapists used to use BPD as a catch all when they couldn't figure out what else was going on. I don't agree with inpatient settings though. You check in, they pamper you and tell you everythings fine, then send you back out into the same reality that got you in there in the first place. Its setting up patients for failure.
A whole range of personal feelings. It's one of the most heartbreaking conditions I know of. They need a whole ton of reassurance and love, a whole ton. As to hospitalising them, it's better than letting them kill themselves, but it's a last resort option. They need therapy with a good therapist. They need your support and they need to be shown that you are trustworthy. Tough cases.
A sabbathical is not really an option, I'll most probably be required to start my PhD immediately after my master's and help out with lectures, labs etc. My prof is basically relying on me in that case already.
I'll be going to the US for a 2 month internship over the summer, so I'm hoping that change of location will work positively for me. After that I'll probably have around 2 months in winter without classes or work before I have to start working on my master's thesis. I'm hoping to get a good rest in that time and travel a lot.
Anyways, I feel like a had a small breakthrough already tonight while studying and just writing all this helps too.
That said, thanks for the advice, you're probably right. I'm sure I'll get back into it soon and push through.
Yes. Very much so. I love humans and feel my whole life mission is to take care of them. Nothing makes me feel better in my life. When I help, I feel like I'm doing what I was supposed to do.
Is falling in love with someone I can't have my fault?
How long do you keep patient records for? If you die what happens to those records? Can the police see them if you are dead?
>But he keeps saying "all in your own time" and somehow I interpret that as "inaction is your fault". Doesn't check out but feels more like irrational paranoia.
At least you are lucid about it. Follow your instinct and get it all out! Do it!
In your own time literally means in your own time, take it to heart, and follow your actual desire: get it all out. Wait no more! You have a good therapist.
I'm glad my tax goes to fund this shit.
>just therapists in general that I don't trust, and still continue to not trust them. I should be able to get past it right? It sucks.
Speak openly about it, be unafraid. Once you realise he understands, it will be easier to open up. When I did therapy myself, as a patient, I opened with "I come to you with very little hope and no trust," just to make things clear, and to see if the therapist I was seeing would react positively to this. (In case they reacted badly, I would have fucked off right away.)
I am too
I just moved away from an abusive situation, am i ever going to heal and learn to be myself?
An hero already, would you
>That's pretty awful advice.
That's your opinion. All options are not necessary when it's obvious the marriage is already dead. I'm not telling user what to do, but it's clear the problem is serious and there seems to be no desire to save the marriage. You are free to disagree.
How can i be emotionless or how can i feel nothing?
I wish to not to feel anything
>I'll be going to the US for a 2 month internship over the summer, so I'm hoping that change of location will work positively for me.
Might very well be the case.
>have around 2 months in winter without classes or work before I have to start working on my master's thesis.
Sounds good!
>Anyways, I feel like a had a small breakthrough already tonight while studying and just writing all this helps too.
Excellent! Definitely consider seeing a therapist, just to let some of it out in person, this may prove to be a greater release than you expect. Not necessarily to do therapy, but to speak to someone for a while, and see what happens.
I feel very positive about the outcome of all this, user. Good luck with everything, I am convinced you will do great.
We have a whole string of patients who escalate their behaviours in inpatient setting, particularly on specific personality disorder wards when they are surrounded by similar peers. They regularly attempt to commit suicide and tie ligatures, and we have had multiple successful suicides/deaths by misadventure despite level of observations. I don't see the hospital environment doing anything, and don't consider their artificial restricted lives in hospital as actually living.
Those that I see do best are the ones denied admissions, from areas with more strong willed professional, willing to take the risks.
Can being a very empathetic person be bad for a persons own mental well being? Is there such a thing as having too much empathy?
>Is falling in love with someone I can't have my fault?
No. It's not your fault.
You might want to wonder how important is the fact that the person is out of reach in your feelings. Sometimes we fall in love with what we can't have precisely because we can't have it.
They are medical records, they belong to the person, not me. The police would have access to them if necessary, if you're dead, typically, not if I am. Me dying would just means your file get transferred or back to you.
>brutal
The taxpayers are paying for you to have these “treatmeants”. It’s far from brutal.
>I just moved away from an abusive situation, am i ever going to heal and learn to be myself?
Yes, read about personal boundaries and remember to apply symmetry in relationships.
This won't work. It'll just make things worse. If you could do this, it'd work for a while and then everything would be a thousand times worse. Learn to handle the feels, not bury them. Think of them as waves, and you are the surfer.
>you are
>not
>the wave
Why? i'm not doing you any harm, and i don't convince people to be trans, whats the harm in my existence?
What would you recommend someone do who has active PTSD that still affects her life? I've had it since I was a child. In a lot of ways, I can be really psychopathic. I don't know if I would have naturally just been like that with or without the dissociation from the PTSD. I can't really remember a time when I was "normal." I remember when I was younger than nine, I thought the only way to cross a threshold with people was to hurt them, to rip them apart, because "cuddling and being nice could only go so far." But it's so much more complicated than this. I have a lot of issues, I'm sure. The impulse control problems have proved seriously problematic at times, but the PTSD has me feeling like I can't control my own body and self when it's triggered, and that's seriously not okay.
It's a sexual thing. Like, someone touching me in a sweet way, a kind way, their skin meeting with mine, causes me more severe pain than someone actually physically injuring me, which is part of why I like violence in my sex. It's the only way I can stay in control.
I, to this day, have to actively fight to sit still and not attack even my doctors when they have to touch me. God, I'm not even sure specifically what my question is.
I've tried flooding, like exposing myself to stimuli so much that I finally stopped freaking out and was just exhausted and empty, every day, for such a long time when I was a teenager. I was raped many times, and I remember one of the times, he put these stupid, cheap handcuffs on me, and I kept taking them off silently and he would just put them back on and tell me to stop. I wouldn't look at him.
So I stopped being able to have my arms behind my back without freaking out. I mean, I could go from being so cool, so slick, to a totally different person when the PTSD was triggered. The weird thing is that during the incidents of the actual trauma, I also kept my cool.
Flooding desensitized me to certain stuff but it wasn't the way to go.
Oh no i dont want to run away from them i just think they are unnecessary for living
Do you think it’s justified to put a suicidal patient in a psych ward against their will?
Jesus Christ... But yeah, concentrating people with the same issues, in this case, may be a very bad idea. This will vary from country to country, but goddam, this sounds bad. What country are you in?
Do you believe that hypnotherapy can be beneficial to treat things like anxiety, depression and social anxiety/awkwardness?
As a straight white male, I get no interest at all from the GP. You've probably used more NHS money in a year than I have in 10. So I have no problem with you existing, but pay for your own elective treatments, parasite.
>Can being a very empathetic person be bad for a persons own mental well being? Is there such a thing as having too much empathy?
If you learn to handle it, you can minimise the bad, or learn to protect yourself better - your main risk is being abused for your empathy - so there's that.
Learn to have healthy limits and your empathy will not bother you too much, but yes, it will be tricky.
>I thought the only way to cross a threshold with people was to hurt them, to rip them apart,
I'm interested in this, can you elaborate? Why did you feel this way?
Symmetry?
There is a psychological disorder that happens sometimes when a girl loses a child in the womb. What would you call someone who has a healthy child but still suffers from this, reason being she isn’t pregnant anymore.
They gives pills for this.
>someone touching me in a sweet way, a kind way, their skin meeting with mine, causes me more severe pain
Accepting love and attention may be so new to you that it hurts. You're gonna make me cry, user. Goddam.
I have an obssessive compulsive personality disorder.
What is the key to stop functioning this way?
>It's the only way I can stay in control.
Trust. You cannot trust, for now, and being given love requires some measure of letting go, of being vulnerable, of trusting.
UK
>In your own time literally means in your own time, take it to heart, and follow your actual desire: get it all out
Is it a desire though? Some days it feels like I'm rushing the process. Others I'm so frustrated with inaction that I try to blurt out as much as possible, even if its off topic. Which feels like it translates to tangential rambling more than some kind of productive dialogue. He knows I don't trust him but it feels like that's what holds us back from advancing further. I have to get over that distrust but I just cant. It feels like hes lying, constantly. Lying about understanding, about my diagnosis, about my treatment options, everything. Like all he does is lie. But that's so improbable that its borderline ridiculous.
(Continued) ...because I was particularly concerned with the potential consequences were I ever to be arrested and handcuffed, what with my inability to have my hands behind me back, I would put them behind my back and lay on the floor, alone, in the bathroom, as a teenager, and I would writhe and freak out, but I kept doing it, as a regular thing.
When I was much younger, I felt I had to defend myself whenever doctors or people touched me. My parents would cut my nails so short that they would bleed, and I would still manage to cut people open with them. Doctors would have to have several nurses hold me down, even though I've always been severely underweight. I'm definitely a fighter. I never even questioned my actions after I did what I did when I was especially small, it was just what I thought had to be done from the moment they touched me. The screaming white noise.
White noise is just a state that means I have to get out of a situation, away from a perceived threat, or I kill the threat, and anything that gets in my way is just that: in my way. I lose any compassion for things I usually find charming. I'm not even mad, I'm just... in some ways, it's been like a super power for me, because my childhood was BAD.
I'm sorry, I don't have a lot of direction with this.
I don't know that you can help me.
I've been responding in several smaller posts, but it's me, OP.
You would do well to read about the amygdala and such, to understand the mechanics of all of this, so you don't take it too personally and feel like it's your fault. These mechanisms are well known and studied, and it fits what you describe perfectly. It's 100% normal too.
I feel for you, Jesus Christ. By all means, feel no guilt about your reactions, it's normal, a normal response to extraordinary trauma.
On the contrary, feelings help you with living. That's how you know if you're in tune with your life and decisions. Very important compass in your life.
Because it was the only way I could trust what they were feeling, I think, and feel it with them.
>I also kept my cool
You were in shock. The body goes into auto-pilot, and stashes the memory away for you to react to at a later time. In that moment, you're just trying to survive by any means necessary. And that might mean acting like everything is fine when its not.
>Do you think it’s justified to put a suicidal patient in a psych ward against their will?
It is. If you are pretty sure there's a risk that the patient will kill themselves, it is justified, but it's a radical decision and should be considered very cautiously and seriously before you act, as this can break the trust between you and the patient forever. In most cases, if the patient wants to die seriously, he will welcome the idea of being taken to a place where he is taken care of and can let go.
How can you believe your profession to be scientific when every human is programmed to do the least amount of work for the most gain?
If you pretend you are mentally ill then you can enjoy life without having to work. It's the best ruse of them all and to be scientific you would have to assume every patient is coming to get a fake diagnosis.
I have been genuinely mentally "different" for 30 years and I find it easy to spot people who are making up bs and I reckon that at least 75% of people claiming to be mentally disabled are not and just have shitty lives or have made shitty choices or are in shitty situations.
How many of your patients do you think are fooling you with symptoms?
Personally, I cringe whenever hypnotherapy is mentioned, but since people have results from it (whether it's placebo or no doesn't matter), then so be it. I'm a pragmatic person. But I'll admit it's too bullshitty for me. That said, if you think this could help you, try it!
My remedy for social awkwardness: be more social, hang out more, practice, capitalise on confidence, and practice, practice. Eventually you'll know your way around socially and you won't be so anxious anymore.
Not the person you replied to there, but why do you jump straight to depression? It could just me multiple personal dillemas that the person is having trouble dealing with therefore looking for an easy way out and seeing suicide as the easiest option to rid themself of their problems..
Yea sounds like me but also sounds vague enough to be 95% if people since most people long for acceptance
I also wanted to be a serial killer when I was younger. Don't worry, I grew out of it. I thought people were really beautiful back then, and I wanted to explore them. I felt like their emotions were something I couldn't experience, or a lot of them were. For that reason, I constantly thought we were all faking it, but I knew in my heart that they were not, and so then I just felt like I was outside of it all. Like, I had friends. I actually started a far few cults. In the first grade, I stole a bunch of gems and buried them in the mud and then faked visions about them. I had friends, but I constantly wondered if they ever actually cared about me, because I couldn't care about them. I would shut down if they cried to me, but I loved to watch them cry when I wasn't involved, because it seemed... unbelievable. Like literally incredible. No matter how many times I saw it, it seemed foreign. Like, I couldn't wrap my head around it. And I thought if I hurt them in a controlled environment, I could experience all of that humanness, through them.
Hey man, how are you doing?
I'm the 40 year old virgin, you know, the one hearing voices and living in the basement?
Well... I went to an interview the other week and although it went nice... but they didn't hire me, another lost job, another failure.
So fuck it... I don't know. Guess I should pick up my pieces and try again. But I'm so tired...
Anyway, not asking for help now, too late for that.
How are you doing anyway??
Swap places: if things become different, you have a symmetry problem.
>I'd not mind sacrificing this for my friend
>if I were the friend, would I mind? Yes? oh, symmetry problem
By swapping roles, you get a new perspective on things, and it shows you what may be wrong more easily.
>Dad would slap me hard when I was 4
>Would I slap my own son if he was 4?
>No? Then why do I accept what my dad did? Symmetry problem.
Is porn induced erectile dysfunction a real thing? Can it be reversed?
I have:
Double depression
Social anxiety disorder
ADHD
Addiction
Narcissistic personality disorder
OCD tendencies
Do I have a chance at this life thing?
Post partum depression?
I feel like you'll have less sympathy when you read the part about me wanting to be a serial killer when I was a kid xD but I did grow out of it. It was actually the GENEVA CONVENTION that kind of changed my mind. Funny story. I still do have a sadistic side, but I am SO well behaved these days. I came on Yea Forums today to request videos of people's suicides, though, and found this thread, so this is awkward.
There are specific therapies designed for this, I don't specialise in these, however, but there's a whole program. You can find more easily online.
It's typically related to stress management.
We have patients who have been in hospital for BPD/EUPD for as much 15 years from age of 16.
Regularly carrying out severe self-harm and suicide attempts despite horid poly pharmacy, horid off-label use of clozapine, and personality disorder focused therapies such as DBT etc.
>Others I'm so frustrated with inaction that I try to blurt out as much as possible, even if its off topic.
Possibly a way to fake trying to move forward, as being off topic makes it useless. It's like you're both trying to move forward and stay right where you are. Taking steps without advancing. Contradictory desires, but I am sure it makes sense to you.
ITT: Ask a fake scientist anything. You have a dumbass degree that has dumbass uses for dumbass people. If your degree even has any accreditation at all. Sounds no better than Trump University.
What gives "psychologists" the authority to treat anything? The "treatments" appear no different than the bullshit religions peddle. Just sit in the chair and confess your sins, everything will be okay. Take these drugs, they'll "probably" stop you from feeling these things you don't like to feel (by fucking with your neural pathways).
>He knows I don't trust him but it feels like that's what holds us back from advancing further.
It does hold you back, it does!
>It feels like hes lying, constantly. Lying about understanding, about my diagnosis, about my treatment options, everything. Like all he does is lie.
Tell him! Remember, he is your guide in the dark, tell him, be unafraid.
I do have a problem with that, I'll drop anything for my friends,do everything in my power to help, but get extremely self conscious when they do any small thing for me
I have a theory the more a person reveals as their diagnosis the more likely it is to be bullshit.
Fuck that shit, the best way to stay connected and not let your mind wander is to avoid focusing on your mental issues........people with genuine mental problems....you have to suck that shit out of them.....people who blab non stop about their mental issues are the bullshitters
I understand you. The response you have to perceived danger is very well described. I feel the exact same when my own intimacy is intruded: I'd do anything it takes to get out of the predicament.
And yes, everything you wrote speaks volume to me. You would do well to read about the brain specifically, the amygdala, and trauma in general. It will do you a lot of good.
If you can get therapy, do so. There's a lot that can be done to help you. I'm optimistic about your case. You are strong.
When your gf asks for space does it really mean just space.
>Because it was the only way I could trust what they were feeling, I think, and feel it with them.
Floored me. You're giving me quite the feels, user. Goddam.
I've been reading all of your responses, btw.
I used to say that I wanted people to understand me, but then I wasn't sure if that was such a good idea. Because maybe to understand me was to be understood as a monster.
I'm a lot more caring than I used to be. For people. I fought to hold onto things for a while there. I'm one of the most honest people I know at this point in my life, which is a pretty huge switch from my prior life as a bona fide cult leader (I was put in a correctional school for it even). I listen to people. I am extremely understanding. I am always analyzing everything and those around me, and, if you have some strokes of darkness but I feel like you are just misunderstood, I will be there when others aren't. But I still have always felt inhuman in many respects.
My first memory is of my mother almost ending my life through suffocation.
She also later put me into a coma with Benadryl "to put me to sleep" as a baby and I stopped breathing in the hospital.
My whole life growing up was just awful.
I have been kidnapped several times, most of them through my mother (she was a meth addict and tried to abort both my little sister and I with drugs because she didn't want daughters, because she later went on to say she didn't think she could ever love a girl because she didn't love herself).
I think that I am a strong person. I have too many different things going on in these posts and too many questions, haha...
She is talking about outer space, probably an alien has taken over her body, kill her before it is too late.
Psychology is not a real science
>How can you believe your profession to be scientific when every human is programmed to do the least amount of work for the most gain?
I don't see the connection. Energy conservation applies to human beings as it does to physics too. Hardly the way to define something as scientific.
>If you pretend you are mentally ill then you can enjoy life without having to work.
I don't understand this. Being mentally ill doesn't prevent you from working. Having a job is an important factor in good mental health, in fact.
>How many of your patients do you think are fooling you with symptoms?
None. Why would they fake symptoms to begin with? None of my patients are trying to quit their jobs.
A good psychopath test on internet that you would recommend?
>but why do you jump straight to depression?
The person mentioned wanting to die several times a day, that's why.
>It could just me multiple personal dillemas that the person is having trouble dealing with therefore looking for an easy way out and seeing suicide as the easiest option to rid themself of their problems..
That doesn't change anything.
Sure, but people see acceptance in different ways. Facials might be your way.
Are you a woman? And if so do you fuck the depression out of your clinics? Also I think I have schizoid whatever it's called sometimes I feel psychotic
OP 3 years ago I came home to my girlfriend of 4 years body after she shot her self, haven't wanted to be alive since. I don't want to kill my self I'd just rather not be alive. Advice? Tried therapy but american mental healthcare is garbage.
Jesus Christ... Thank you for your posts, they're fascinating. There's a good chance you are a clinical psychopath, that being said. Everything you describes matches; consider also ASPD. I personally knew someone who similarly loved to explore my feelings this way, because it seemed unbelievable to her.
Question, asking for a friend: would you manipulate someone on purpose if you saw that they loved you immensely and that whatever you did made them react intensely? Would you toy around with them to extract their emotions?
Anyway, thanks for listening. I've been wanting to go to a therapist since forever. When I was eighteen, I went, and he told me that I seemed highly sociopathic, but long term I don't think I stayed with him long enough, and I didn't talk about some of this stuff.
>Well... I went to an interview the other week and although it went nice... but they didn't hire me, another lost job, another failure.
Another step towards success! Be proud that you went to it and did well. That's all that matters. Their failure for not hiring my boy the 40 yo virgin! You're a badass, let no one think otherwise.
>Anyway, not asking for help now, too late for that.
It's never too late, Forty. I believe in you.
I personally doubt it. I think people blame porn for a lot of things when it's not involved. Make sure the problem isn't purely mechanical, because sometimes it is.
What on earth is "double depression"?
Is there some web site that churns these sob stories out? ffs there has to be, you grandpa fucked your puppy, your gf has a cock, you nearly stopped breathing but the doctors fought like ninjas to save you, you did enough hard drugs to kill a blue whale but you're here on /b tonight and like... just wow!
I used to do that, but I actually don't believe in lying anymore... for the most part. If I'm being honest, I might sometimes break a rule here or there because I've never felt guilty about anything in my life and it's really easy not to care about stuff, but I created my rules to try to ensure a better life for myself, so I really do try to stick by them. If I ever got caught breaking one of my own rules after I quite loudly announced that I was "changing my ways," I would have nowhere to go from there. No possible way of trying to make a case for myself. I understand now that no matter how many people I had convinced with my lies before, I could still be shot. That might sound random, but the thought occurred to me in AP history, when I was sitting there in class. We were talking about the Geneva Convention, and I realized I was not promoting a society that was truly safe for me to live in, and, when my bullshit eventually came out as bullshit, I always had to pack up and start over. I wondered what it would be like to actually be a person.
I will flirt and read signs with people, but I don't boldface lie anymore on a social level.
>I feel like you'll have less sympathy
No, I have known people like you before. If anything, I feel even more for you, because of all the beautiful things you can't feel.
There's still good in you, I can feel it.
>mfw being a therapist to psychopaths is like being Luke Skywalker trying to convince Vader he isn't lost permanently
Sounds like a fucking nightmare.
I'm a real scientist.
I kind of destroyed this guy recently... He spent his entire inheritance on me almost, like he owned a separate property and he spend over thousands of dollars on me and moved states to be with me. But I didn't do it with the intention of destroying him... it's actually SUPER SAD and I feel like I'd be devastated about it if I got devastated about that stuff. I'll tell you about it after I try to pathetically smoke a few cigarette butts. I will be back.
>What gives "psychologists" the authority to treat anything? The "treatments" appear no different than the bullshit religions peddle.
Same as any medical authority. You're validated by a whole institution, based on science. That's the difference with religions here.
>Their failure for not hiring my boy the 40 yo virgin! You're a badass, let no one think otherwise.
Not cool dude, not cool, don't lie to me.
Don't tell me I'm good, I'm a failure and a loser.
Well, my ex boyfriend fucked a dog and killed it
and fucked another dog's broken jaw after he broke the jaw so it couldn't bite him...
Sorry, just going on your dog post, because that's about the point where I stopped reading.
I don't need you to believe me.
Exactly! Apply symmetry, my nigga. It should be the same both ways: this example shows you that you are scared to take your place. Now, do this: imagine your friend is now the person who feels how you would normally feel: what's your reaction?
>friend doesn't want to ask you for any help because it makes them feel bad
How do you feel? Now swap and realise a good friend will feel the same way about you.
Remember: giving a friend an opportunity to help you is enabling them to be a good friend to you, which is something you yourself crave, so start assuming others want the same thing you want. Giving and receiving are the same thing in good relationships.
Happily together with wife for ~10 years. We're both bi, so we started bringing other partners into our bedroom roughly 6 years ago. Within the past 3 or so years I've been slowly indulging in crossdressing play. Wife is super supportive and we both enjoy our time exploring that kink as I can dress fairly convincingly.
My question is whether there is anything inherently damaging to my mental health in indulging in this fantasy. Anything that might cause unintended negative consequences?
Thanks!
Oh boy....
Find me a single person on this planet who would care about any of this.....no fucker....once you understand that....you can save yourself a lot of time. You're making up an alternate reality where you imagine other people give a fuck.
It may. It may also mean more. It's the best time to actually give her space, as she most likely feels too suffocated by your relationship. Whatever happens, you let her take the next step. Don't contact her until she does.
Hey OP, I always want to fuck new girls and I cheated on my girlfriends countless times. I lie, I make up excuses and fuck bitches I meet from tinder. I'm 27 years old, I workout every day. Is there something wrong with me? I feel like I get bored with one constant person so I always have the need to conquer new pussies.
What a ride... I'll provide a way to stay in touch. Just wait.
It is. As real a science as a science can be.
Do you mean cognitive and behavioral therapies ?
>and practice, practice
This. I started forcing myself to go to parties to try to curb this social anxiety problem and I found out that the more I practiced socializing, the easier it became. Making friends is easy. Forming friendships is the hard part, and fortunately its totally optional. All most people want is for someone to stand there, nod and say "you're so right, what an asshole!"
Best tip I can give? Everyone loves talking about themselves. Ask about something they're interested in, and they'll just ramble for hours while you smile at them and call it a good time.
Keep trying therapy, just don't insist if you don't feel it with one therapist.
what is ur posture on consciousness ?
>feeling guilt
Not ASPD or psychopathy.
>feeling pride for how fucked up you are
Not sociopath.
Try "reduced affect" instead.
>We're both bi, so we started bringing other partners into our bedroom roughly 6 years ago.
Have you been checked for STDs ? There is a very virulent strain going around at the moment. Very nasty, resistant to antibiotics its been seen in the LGBT community for the last 9 months but it looks like it is going to jump across to the general population.
Fascinating still. The self-aware psychopath. It's like seeing a demon progressively understanding its nature and trying to change for the best. Truly inspiring.
No, just garden variety insecurities. Forming trusting relationships really is a scary thing, isn't it? Lots of unknowns, lots of intimacy involved. A lot goes into a committed relationship. Its a very scary prospect, one that makes a person yearn for the early stages of a relationship indefinitely. Is commitment as big of a step as we think it will be? Usually not. It can be as easy as marrying your best friend, and not cheating simply because you don't want to hurt them or your relationship with them.
I meant what I said, Forty. If you don't accept my words, that means you're calling me a liar, and I would be displeased with this insult! I do mean what I said. Accept my words, they tell you the truth. You have it tough and are doing great. Keep going!
I've tried 6 each for a month up to 6 months
webwhiteboard.com
OP will show up in there.
I have someone responding to me. None of this stuff is an "alternate reality," but posting proofs would link this to myself.
>is anything inherently damaging to my mental health in indulging in this fantasy
Nope. Part of a perfectly healthy sex life. I'm glad you both have that level of comfort between you, to explore this without judging one another. The harm comes from doing the exact opposite and I'm glad she's not doing that.
If both of you are enjoying it and there's good communication about what you do, I don't see anything harmful.
Surprises can always happen but as long as you communicate, you should be fine if anything comes up.
Yeah, I was thinking I wanted to give you an alternate email to contact me at, but I'm not sure I remember the password. If you give me yours, I will email you from my actual email.
Alright, alright, I believe your opinion is genuine and I respect it but I don't accept it.
Every fact shows that I'm a loser.
Anyway, just wanted to say hi.
Hi!
user, you are living in an alternate reality if you think everyone is like you. Most people do care. You are not the norm.
>I feel like I get bored with one constant person so I always have the need to conquer new pussies.
Possibly you need to prove yourself over and over again because you don't actually think you're worthwhile.
After my event, it took me about 4 years to seek therapy. It wasn't that I didn't try, just that there was no point. I just wasn't ready to cope with it, or deal with it. Don't force yourself into therapy if it won't do you any good right now. Sometimes, the brain needs to come to terms with reality rather than forcing itself to process things it simply rejects as untrue, too painful, etc.
Yeah it's really scary. Likethe first girl I dated (I was 15) committed suicide and my first real girlfriend (me 18 her 17) cheated on me just to hurt me a lot. I met many good women after that but I always cheated on them and lied to them. I feel like I can't be happy with one single person now.
Not OP. Damage to your brain just behind the forehead can dampen emotions. Psychopaths have this (together with a whole ton of other crap). Otherwise severe stress situations can inflict an "emotional emergency break" on you (there may be some side effects though)
This isn't OP. Read again.
By the way, the reason I used to shut down immediately when I was younger when people cried directly to me was because I automatically assumed they were trying to manipulate me.
what counts as "psychopathy"? how does it present?
>I respect it but I don't accept it.
That's the very problem. Accept my opinion, it is the truth, then some day you may have a good opinion of yourself too. I believe in you, my man.
Ahh, to be this naive. Your childhood must've been fantastic. I bet you had both parents and everything. Must be nice.
Yep. We get a full barrage of tests every 3 months or so and require all of our partners to get tested prior to play. We still only play safe. We
Inability to feel emotions much, or at all. Absence of guilt, impossible or hard to "care" truly for others, beyond an abstract concept of caring. Stuff like that. Like not having nerves and therefore not realising what hurts others or not. Generally surprised at other people's reactions, like being an alien.
No you cant, you may as well accept that you are lying cheater and just do hook ups. You will be a lot happier for it.
I gave you the most accurate disgnosis that I could. I didn’t even include seasonal affective disorder because I got diagnosed with it years ago, and it doesn’t seem correct anymore. I didn’t include borderline personality disorder or antisocial personality disorder or adjustment disorder because only one doctor brought those up. Last week I got discharged after 2 months in a psych ward.
I also realize that on some level, talking about this stuff does excite me or rile me up, because it always makes me want to smoke ciggies, but it's just not the same as other people. I used to watch people on TV break down and cry about certain things that had also happened to me, and I felt like I couldn't do that. If I did, it would be fake. It's just not how I am.
I felt like I was an inherent tragedy in this sense, because I lusted after their emotions, but didn't actually want to be like them. It was like knowing something I could never have, but also knowing myself this way as being WHO I AM.
I constantly relive things, or I used to, as a way of trying to feel something or to hold onto the bits of things that actually did make me feel.
what do u think of jordan peterson
Thread will die soon. Find me there.
>cheated on me just to hurt me a lot.
Unfortunately I hear this from most of my cheater type friends too. Its almost always that a previous lover cheated on them, therefore they can't trust any other subsequent lover afterwards. They assume that person will also break their trust, so they break that persons trust first so they arent the ones to get hurt again. Sound logic when a persons in pain, but in practice it starts to form a cycle that becomes harder and harder to break. Sometimes, the best therapy is a small step in the "right" direction, right meaning the direction you want to go in as an individual. It reads like you don't want to cheat anymore, but that you feel you must. Which is good news because it means the desire for change is there, which is ultimately the hardest part.
Fuck.
Like a schizoid would.
Well thats just fantastic then.
Yes except they had no trauma of losing a child
I’d call it a pill head
how do you feel about de facto diagnoses? my fiance keeps going to his therapist and she tells him that my diagnosis is borderline but she's never even met me before.
Serious question. I’m a medical student. Why should I go into psychiatry if a prescribing psychologist can pretty much do a psychiatrist’s job with half the training?
It is "losing a child" in a different sense.
Consider the possibility that your fiancée is lying to you and the therapist gave HER that diagnosis.
That sounds highly unusual to discharge you with out prescribing seasonal affective disorder meds, you could become overcome with psychosis. Are you in a city?
>if a prescribing psychologist can pretty much do a psychiatrist’s job with half the training?
The training is the same for both. The only difference is what comes before. There's no "half the training", you'd typically do 4 years of postgraduate studies. As a psychiatrist, you will typically be paid more for the same amount of work, though.
what's the difference with psychopathy and autism?
I’m afraid of going back to school. I dropped out of HS at 17 bc I got kicked out of home; didn’t get my GED until 22 literally last December. I did exceptionally well. I’ve signed up for college courses and I’m taking my TSI’s, I passed one today, but the field I want To go into is health science, specifically a surgical technologist & I’m just terrified that A&P is going to absolutely kick my ass. How can I cope with stress and anxiety in a healthy way? I really want this but I’m afraid that my anxiety will overpower my motivation. My gf is a Bachelors degree Nurse, her sister a Dr, her husband a surgeon, his mother head of EMS & microbiology PHD.... I just... am extremely nervous, that I won’t be able to live up to their expectations.
Nah, she gave him garden variety depression. He's on zoloft right now and responding well enough. His peaks aren't as severe, that's for damn sure. I guess he's in there talking about how I can't look at mirrors anymore.
What science? Seriously, nobody knows what the fuck is going on in our brains, they're all just guessing. They throw drugs at the patient and hope for the best. They say some bullshit that the patient wants to hear so they keep coming back to give them more money.
I strongly believe that life is just a big RNG, the way your brain formed, the successes/failures you have in life. Everything is just chaos. Which means, if your RNG gave you a fucked up brain, then just ALT-F4 and rage quit. Don't fumble through life looking for meaning or bother trying to understand it all, there's no reason for anything to exist.
Nobody asked if you wanted to be born, why should you be forced to continue living? I think assisted suicide will become the norm as society evolves and realizes that we don't need everyone on this planet. Not everyone is going to be a useful/productive member of society, and not everyone adds value to our species success. And that's fine, it's all just chaos, why not make it easier on them to just end the chaos?
Like, why try to fix mental illness and homeless? Just fucking let their bad genes rot somewhere we don't care about and let our species evolve faster and more efficiently.
Medical student here, I’ve known a fuckton of borderlines.
Diagnosing someone without seeing them is bullshit of the highest degree.
But it doesn’t sound like he’s diagnosing you, and keep in mind that borderline behavior is relatively distinct. If you described a borderline’s behavior to me, I could very fairly say “sounds borderline to me.” That’s not a diagnosis though. That’s just an impression based on heresay.
Perhaps the more accurate thing would be to say “that sounds like a personality disorder, they should get checked out.”
Psychopathy is a 30 or higher on the PCL-R (max score: 40). However, the PCL-R is flawed in some respects in that it does not differentiate from psychopathic type and plain ASPD. Most psychopaths would have ASPD, which is a persistent disregard for the rights and or property of others. But: consider this - a psychopath in a wheelchair, or a psychopath paralyzed by an additional condition, unable to display many of the behavioral facets. Still a psychopath. There is neuroscience to it.
Psychopaths do not classically feel empathy; though, a new study revealed that they could consciously empathize.
Psychopaths have a diminished fear response, but, interestingly, not a diminished response to phobic triggers.
Psychopaths feel love differently, it's more possessive. It's not what is traditionally known as love.
Psychopaths have decreased impulse control, and a decreased response to punishment.
Psychopaths have an increased response to reward. Psychopaths scoring a 30 or higher had 4x as much dopamine released in response to the administration of amphetamines than the controls did in a study released by the Vinderbilt University when I was still in high school.
Psychopaths often feel bored.
There are behavioral characteristics as well not listed here.
There are different degrees of psychopathy once a person has hit 30 on the PCL-R.
There are also different types of psychopaths, depending on the school of thought. Like the classic psychopath.
There are things called I believe LCEs, or something involved as well...
>people who blab non stop about their mental issues are the bullshitters
this. i never trust these people. they're proud of their condition which means it isn't actively doing everything it can to destroy them, inside and out. and destroying their lives, and everything they've ever tried to build. its not something to be proud of. "im so fucked up lel". if you were, i'd never know about it because talking about it would be too painful.
Psychopaths can't feel emotions much, so no empathy. Autists struggle to understand others and often fail to consider things from another person's point of view, but they have feelings.
Yes I live in a city with about one million people.
How did you get your masters/phd? Im trying to become a psychologist and currently only have a double bacgelors degree in pscyhology and philosophy, any advice on how i can progress/get a better job