ITT autistic things you do

Collect plants to the point that my room is literally a greenhouse

Kek maybe that's more common than I thought.

>autistic things you do

Your mother

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cut a zip lock bag, fill it with lube, put it under a pillow and treat it like a pussy

I have all these virtual "collections". For example I have a folder with over 1300 pictures of Jesus.

topkek OP

Could you post few of your favorite Jesuses?

These aren't my favourites but there are some nice ones.

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>448 MB

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That sounds more like OCD. The real one, not that shit tumblrinas are always on about.

Why not use a couch?

my family sits on it

same must close every door cant help it paranoia got me good

Nice. Thanks. Jesus is based.

I would check the mailbox 5 times before getting on the bus to make sure there was no packages after I closed it the first time. Also Ive been biting the skin near my fingernails and eatting it for fun I guess.

i said why am i so autistic out loud in class and everyone heard me

The list is as follows:
>flip my hands when at my most excited
>make weird grunt noises subconsciously (but then notice) when I clear my throat
>brain is built to notice patterns with unrelated shit, to the point where I deconstruct simple words looking for unrelated connections, sometimes (most) resulting in nothing.
>simulate past memories, present potential replies for interaction for the day, as well as future simulated conversations in oder to predict likely outcomes for relies and overall opposing arguments/ replies. (this shit is fucking exhausting, but my Brain does it on autopilot)
>I don't know how to actually study, but my brain functions like a search engine in which all past memories related to the subject pull up like in a search engine (but my brain is very visual, thus it's s a Literal simulated blur of vibes and fellings representing vast data/ images (but for the harder stuff, I keep detailed accounts)
>I breathe on manual (like other shit)

Should I list moar?

>Brain is built to notice patterns with unrelated shit, to the point where I deconstruct simple words looking for unrelated connection

Every waking moment of my life user.

Whenever I go out and I lock the door I always check it 3 times and once I get out and I'm on the street I go back home to check it again.

Time song parts perfectly when lifting
Can't do it mentally otherwise

So cringey, that sounds fucking exhausting. Post moar

>waking moment
Yes, the literal moment I'm conscious, my brain begins shitposting random crap, I'm just on observer while it does its thing.

browse Yea Forums all day long instead of doing anything productive

>Stutter and speak gibberish when nervous or under stress
>head twitch sometimes, I don’t know why
>can’t look people in the eyes cause afraid of saying something retarded

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There are so many things I do that I KNOW are autistic as hell but I can't stop doing them or else it just doesn't feel right
>tense my hands and twitch my hands/arms around when I get really excited
>randomly make loud, hissing noises or monster sounds
>act out battles and scenarios from cartoons where I'm a self insert doing stuff (one time imagined I was in the steven universe universe and I was a warrior from a planet the gems had destroyed hundreds of years ago, and, seeking revenge, I came to earth to kill the gems. I don't even fucking watch that show I just know a little bit about it)
>talk in a slightly deeper voice and pretend it's someone else
>play video games all day every day
>randomly stop talking to long time friends for no reason, block them on all social media, and delete them from friend's lists
>browse Yea Forums every single day for hours instead of doing literally anything else
>watch kids cartoons even though I'm 21 years old
>sometimes don't shower for days or even up to 2 weeks at a time for seemingly no reason
>dream up elaborate revenge fantasies in my head despite being a shut in NEET
>pick my nose and wipe it on tissue instead of just blowing my nose
>sometimes I have to pause movies/shows I'm watching in order to act out scenarios where i'm in the movie as a super powerful character who can instantly kill the bad guys, or sometimes I'm a dark evil character who comes in and kills the bad guy, only to become a badder guy
>yell nigger and other racial obscenities randomly in discord chats for no reason

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Can relate to some of these. Especially nigger part

catch %%save%% pepes. no googling allowed, only ones i find here

>pick nose and wipe it on tissue

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not autsitic; post pics of your rad plantroom.

The relatability hits me hard user.

I second this. Please post it

>Only eat bread when there's mayonaise on it

I refuse to read fiction. I would rather read an owners manual to something I dont even own.
If I like an article of clothing, I refuse to wear it in order to preserve it.
Sometimes too many people talking at once freaks me out and I get anxious and cant really participate in the conversation.
I recheck locked doors and everything else constantly

I dont know how reading not reading fiction is autism. Im on your side tho fuck fiction rather read something useful.

I dont know either, but the fiction thing was on some online adult autism thing

I’m a femanon and any time my boyfriend and I have sex I can’t watch his face when he cums. It makes me itch and tense up I can’t stand the way his face scrunches

I practise facial expressions

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The most legitimately autistic shit here so far.

>Scan entire house before sleeping, put pencils on every door handle, and a plastic bottle with a marble in it around some corners of the house
>Always check under my bed before sleeping, take excess pillows to create a barrier and then blanket over my head, creates breathing space (airflow) while also covering my entire body.
>Sleep with a knife under my pillow since the age of 7 , currently 20
>Have my breakfast before bed (protein), it counters my extremely fast metabolism
>When taking a shit, put my feet on a step stool, simulating a squat position
>Always mix my water with boiling water to get the exact heat ratio of my food, I never drink any sodas
>Piss in the sink at night
>Always crack my back when passing a counter, then remember to correct my posture, do a little jump and swing my arms like Connor McGregor and stretch my arms
>Create a toilet roll cum collector after taking my daily shit and brushing my teeth for 5 minutes while listening to suicide boys, day dreaming and going over street fight like encounters and combos on how to kill any enemies who might press me.
>Always meditate after lifting my weights
>When washing my long hair, I dry it by lying my head upside down on my bed while catching up on my YouTube subscriptions and maybe browsing pol, then blow dry it the exact same way to create volume. My hair then feels almost weightless and non greasy.
>Take out candles by directing air with my hand
>Wrap my hand in a light cloth and punch a wall and elbow the wall corners to harden the bones and improve my ability to handle physical pain. Ice my hands up afterwards. I sometimes lash myself with a belt to improve my pain tolerance on the days my hands are still healing.

I don't know if thats considered autistic, but I bet no one here does it

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Browse Reddit

I don't know if it counts, but when im watching something and a character on the show says something during an emotional moment, i repeat it out loud to myself, as if im practicing.

>I'm constantly talking to 'myself' (as if another entity to bounce ideas or just thoughts off)
>dream world is better than the real world since I zone out every fucking moment if I'm not entertained from the current work (or just lose focus since the shit is not interesting to me)
>I'm a creature of habit (timing of the day and all)
>I'm smarter than every average fuck, I'm just lazy so I end up only being above average, whereas if I didn't have my self crippling self-deprecating mind where I play devils advocate against everything to get every angle on it (this can fuck you up if you come across a truth you don't like), I'd be excelling.
> I have a shit shorter memory (forget shit mid conversation) but have a photographic memory for useless shit I deem worthy
>I only eat plain foods for some reason
>I could live a carnivore
>eveyone seems slow af noticing shit (whether it be work at uni or social shit within a home /social circle)
I got tested for autism a few years back, along with psychiatric testing for brain functions;
I came out in the 3 digit percentile (99.9)
With a 137 iq overall (with all their different testing)

> I don't feel in control of my body
>I feel like I'm only along for the ride (like a guy watching a monitor with a live feed, only I'm from the first person perspective)
>I see blatant shit that people either ignore (for being the elephant in the room) or just don't notice, even if I Point it out

I have the horsepower and processing speed to do what I want in life (I'm studying software development), but I honestly find more happiness when doing menial hands on work (like building shit).
I have a love hate relationship with existence, as my mind is negative and depressive in waves, yet I'm happy at the same time for appreciation on existence and my connection to God.

It's just really tiresome.
>I can list more habits if you want

Sometimes when I play computer games I’ll stop playing when there is good music and try to recreate the soundtrack with my own humming or things in my room

actually fap to the porn ads on this site when i cant find a good thread

Thats not autistic just pathetic

eh theyre pretty similar in my eyes

1
I have to finish on an odd number of flags on the sidewalk I take or a few steps backwards then for wants to gain the right number
2
Beans cannot touch any other food item on my plate
3
If I decide to eat a subway there must be a equal amount of each toppings for example 6 tomato slices 6 peppers and so on.
4
I count the pumps per fuck to try and achieve a higher number but allways cums around the 300 mark.
There's more but I'd have to tupe out four more to hit my evens target and I'm kinda high rn

COME JOIN THE BEST Yea Forums DISCORD THR WORLD HAS EVER FUCKING SEEN RIGHT NOW!!

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Twy

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these
and when I think of something embarrassing I reflexively say something over and over to try and distract myself
right now it's "death to israel/almawt li'israil"

I feel the same user but then I wonder if I am just a retarded psychopath. And everybody feels the same way. Although there was this one guy from my work who was truly dumb but not autistic.

>always breathng manually
how's that personal hell user?

I lost interest in everyone and everyone quickly realizes I don't give a shit deep down, even when I'm trying to be nice

It's not how you think
>breathes manually
I go though moments where I breathe subconsciously, but when I close my mouth for a long period of time, I'll have a need for air, so naturally I'll Start breathing but then it will be on manual for a bit until I forget about it

m.youtube.com/watch?v=BNANWs2KLj4&feature=youtu.be

>I don't know if thats considered autistic
most of it was, yeah

My legacy to the world is "sharpie in the ass" alot of femanons used to deliver too, check every thread you won't find sharpie in the ass 4 years ago

well if its not permanent its not autistic
everyone breathes manually sometimes
you're doing it right now!

>not autism
It is since I go into crests and troughs of doing it manually or autopilot.
>I also don't recognize social cues according to a my only few friends (facial expressions are a blur, but I recognize the basics after a while through socializing (which I hated) but still don't notice changes in tone, so I rely on body language and the movement of eyes.

It's been like this since I was a young kid when it's on and off, so I'd say that's permanent

Post a picture of you peeing on a table spoon or you're a trap

>Take out candles by directing air with my hand
I do that

>Always meditate after lifting my weights
I meditate before I sleep, and I go to bed 40 minutes after doing my sports session. So pretty much the same.

i've wasted my entire social life playing shitty fucking video games since i was 7 years old
one of which is wow that i've been playing since 2008... am 25 now

shake hands over my head to help with thinking

used to pee outside once a night until I was told not to

always say edgelord things to freak people out

always watching youtube videos I don't like when there isn't anything I like, I need some kind of narrative to latch on to

could only ever talk to people if I'm playing characters

practiced emotions in the bathroom in elementary school

completely shutdown when I'm uncomfortable

ignore any ailments when sick until they go away

use peer pressure to help me drink

>fairly certain I'm autistic but too afraid to get tested

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I only do the forth and fifth one

i cant look people in the eye for more than a second even while talking
it feels fucking weird staring at someone

thinking about it now, i dont even know where i look when i talk to people
random shit in the room i guess

Steal all the juice’s from the lunch room and if I’m questioned say “I didn’t do it but I did see (enter black kids name) near the juice’s” most of the time they are accused and can’t argue back because school is mostly white

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Do you have lots of bitcoin?

i have none at all. not even an account for it.

>Be me at 10 years old
>at recess with a friend
>my friend is an Otaku
>be bored or bored
>suggest to my friend that we pretend to fight as our favorite character
>he accepts the
>I choose ben 10
>he chooses naruto
> epic fighting music playing in the background.mp3
>We start to fight
>I become the Wildmutt
>Beginning to roar as Wildmutt
>my friend starts saying jutsus and starts really hitting me
>We never agreed to really hit each other but that wasn’t going to stop ben 10
>I pull out my Wildmutt claws and start scratching
>I see how little by little we are bringing people our fight
>the guys in my salon start betting on naruto and others on ben 10
>I become four arms
>I start hitting it harder than before
>he begins to shout the jutsu of shadow clones
Out of nowhere appear five children with intent to hit ben 10
>I attack one of the five but four others attack me
>I turn into Ditto and six other guys come from my living room to pretend they’re my clones
>The fight I’m winning
>YESSS.mp3
>my friend gets tired and starts screaming the thousand year death jutsu
>he fucking sticks his fingers in my ear and takes me flying off the battlefield
>the director arrives as she saw from afar our fight
>the director begins to separate us
>was going to take us to the waiting room of the school to call our parents as they were going to expel us
>ben 10 would not accept such a defeat
>I become the XLR8
>I kick my friend’s balls in the balls
>so hard that I throw it to the ground of pain
>escape with super speed
was a good day for ben 10

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Can relate to the social thing

Sniff my own farts on purpose.

i am a person

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