I bought my first house today with my wife. What are you shitheads doing to improve yourselves/your lives?

I bought my first house today with my wife. What are you shitheads doing to improve yourselves/your lives?

Pic related.

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His face looks like it's stuck in another dimensions.

Why would you buy a house with that cow? Did you just settle for the first girl that was nice to you. It's because you're short, isn't it?

Sold my house to some fucking retarded autist and his slut of a wife today.

It was for 10% the market price, so I'm going to use a tiny bit of that money to use her disgusting, gaping holes for a few hours.

Had to Photoshop yourself in so you didn't feel like a worthless piece of shit?

I'm not short, I'm 5'10".

Well it's 5:10 am, so I am going to beat my meat, eat some cereal and sleep until 7:45.

This is what fulfils me.

How are you falling for this shit, mate?

Fire the cork in her face, it'll be an improvement!

My wife is a little self-conscious. Show some respect, asshole.

Heroin. Lots of heroin

Shitty cookie cutter suburb house. Can't even afford bricks to the front door so they use shit looking siding instead.

Fittingly, celebrating with the cheapest bottle of sparkling wine from whatever chain grocery store is nearby.

They'll fill the house with shit furniture from Ikea and hang up signs that say "live laugh love" and raise unremarkable children.

I bought a 170000 pound house with my girlfriend and our 3 month old daughter, getting new car tomorrow also, another 10k, just qualified from uni with my first job, life is good so fuck you

*170000 pound girlfriend

The house is cheap because it comes with a Soy Demon apparently.

She gonna take half bro...

Seriously. His eyes are as black as his sole.

Is that a $5 bottle of sparking wine?
Eat shit and d!3

Kiss mah fucking teath

I'm doing many things to improve my life. Locking myself down, financially also, with a women who is likely no longer capable of even loving me in 5 years time.. I did not do. Enjoy it while it lasts, OP. Might seem amazing right now but that magic runs out sooner or later and then you're left feeling hollowed out like the rest of us.

Great start: Now just keep the old house every time you buy a new one, and collect rent to pay the mortgage. My wife and I just retired with three rental houses and zero mortgages. Our rental income is over $90,000 US per year.

Nice repost fag

Per cent down?

Sweet, what’s next? His and his miatas?

Raising a kid and getting over the divorce from when that loving wife I bought a house with stabbed me in the back, seperated me from all my friends, fucked another dude, and tried to get me to commit suicide for a half-million life-insurance scheme. Cunt.

I'm guessing it wasn't all that expensive by Australian standards... I haven't even got enough money for a decent deposit on a block of land here (let alone a friggin house), and I am by no means living in poverty... Mind you, a decent deposit by my standards is 30% (which will reduce payments significantly).

Are you an scp

I don't drink. I don't smoke. I don't do recreational drugs of any kind. I invest & spend appropriately. I eat healthy meals. I exercise regularly & get plenty of rest.

"Buying your first house" as a sign of maturity is so 1970s. You'll figure it out at some point.

You sound boring as fuck and haven't experienced life. Good for you user.

I have experienced life. That's why I'm as boring as fuck. I've walked past several coffins of classmates & friends who were far more exciting than me.

Waiting for the cat to re-catch the mouse she wanted to gift to me at 5 am in bed so that I can kill it and toss it into the yard. 2 mice in 2 days of not having any for a year is concerning. I want to go back to bed but might wake up to a mouse on my chest.

The joys of home ownership.