I have a job interview this week. If I advance to the second and final round of interviews...

You didn't even read my fucking post man.

Their bullshit if you expect their gonna flush or remove the THC from your system because they won't.

The idea is to flush with water, then mask the fact you flushed with water with the detox drink. It's not actually gonna detox anything, it's just a masking agent to make his urine look normal and disguise the fact he's been drinking water excessively beforehand.

Fuck your stupid link, everyone knows THC binds to fat cells. You can temporarily flush with so much water that fat cells are for a very short time are not in the urine sample. He will fail if he jist pisses out water and they'll make him retest immediately. Thats why you make it look healthy with the detox.

Learn to read you fucking turbo nigger. Holy Fuck.

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I’m already 11 days into being smoke-free. I just worry that there’s a chance it’ll last longer than 20 days (shortest possible timeframe) or still show up beyond 25 days with a proper diet, minimal fat intake, daily vitamin use, etc.

Plenty of people fail using your method. Some people don't and your a prime example of survivorship bias. Act all hoity toity you want faggot. If you aren't being watched and buy from a reputable vendor and can follow simple instructions fake pee will work 100% of the time because it is literally piss.

Drinking water and shit excessively leading up to the test will not help you at all. It's only a preventative measure to remove the thc priar to testing immediately. You arent getting it out any faster that way.

THC binds to fat cells. Exercising may help you burn it out faster, but bewarned this also increases the amount in your urine so do this in advance and not close to your actual testing date.

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If you've smoked daily for two years you'd be lucky to be clean in a month and hoping for the best isn't going to do anything. You're basically gambling at this point. Buy a piss test kit.

That wasn’t OP. I doubt they’ll be interested in my normally healthy water consumption (like I stated, I regularly drink 75-100oz of water a day because I am prescribed adderall and that shit is incredibly dehydrating)

I am definitely loading up on leafy greens and produce while avoiding sugars and fats right now, and typically eat one meal a day because of that fucking adderall suppressing my appetite. I’m hoping having very little fat means THC has less of a chance to bind to fat cells in my body.

You stupid faggot labs test for synthetic. One false reading that discovers this and he's blown it. Synthetic is risky as fuck, you dont think they can't tell its synthetic you double nigger? jesus your a brainlet.

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I’ve got at least another week. First interview is Friday, which is 13-14 days of being smoke-free. If I get that second and final interview, I’m one of two people that made it to that round and that won’t be till at least mid to late next week, closer to 21 days. I’m assuming I’ll get maybe to 23-25 days of being smoke-free before they potentially offer me a job and require the LabCorp screening.

you're a jobless 30 year old, and clearly retarded if you cannot answer your question. did you never have to take drug tests in school or probation or anything?? I'm 30, but make bank, and went through all your shit at like 15 in school getting caught with weed the first time.

I’m a jobless 30 year old? I have a Masters and teach at the college level. I have just not been required to take a drug test for any previous education positions prior to this, but your assumptions are fun!

No faggot. They are checking for the presence of uric acid. If your fake piss doesn't have that and they are testing for uric acid (not all do) then yes you can fail. Piss isn't some super magical substance you moron. We know what it consists of and you can buy kits that contain uric acid and any reputable brand will contain it.

I've passed with fake piss 6 times. Get lost you pseudo-scientifc peddling moron.

Hey moron. Listen to my advice. Buy a drug test kit. Piss in it. This will at least give you some idea of how "clean" you are and you'll at least know if you have to explore other options.

I wasn’t aware a home kit from the grocery store or Walgreens gave much of an indication beyond pass or fail, so I’m not sure I’ll know exactly how clean I’ll be.

I’m trying not to stress myself out too much in advance, so I haven’t bothered with a home test just yet. I figured I’d wait to see how my first round of interviews this Friday goes before I worry about trying to test myself at home and prepping for the last interview.

Funny enough, I recently just took a screen urine thing at labcorp. I can tell you how the process goes if you are thinking about taking someone elses piss.

SO you walk into a room and have to sign in, and you then you go into the back room. They make you take everything out of your pockets, hat wallet etc. but dont pat you down. You get 4 minutes to fill the piss cup up to a line (Not that much) and then piss the rest into a blue dyed toilet that you CANT flush or youll auto fail. It is extremely easy to sneak something in like fake piss or someone elses piss, but I wouldnt recommend it. GL dont fail.

unless it's a government job, most likely no one is going to be watching you piss. If you've smoked daily for years, you are most likely not going to be passing any drug test. The home test basically say if you pass or fail, but if you fail, you know you have to look into other options. I've taken several drug tests for job shit in the last few years and it's always at some urgent care where they don't give a fuck and just tell you to not flush the toilet. They make you lift your pant legs and shit but they don't pat you down or anything.

So let me get this straight. You aren't even willing to at least entertain the idea of figuring out whether or not you're even currently passing/failing? So you'd rather have no idea than at least some indication of where you currently are?

Generally the kits will give you the levels they test at in the box.

If it's legal in the state of employment, unless you're going to be working for a federal contractor, they won't test for it.

Well, the good news is you won’t get the job after failing the drug screening. Maybe it will go to someone that’s not a low life drug addict

It is for teaching, so it isn’t as strict as military and energy government jobs that have constant randoms - those weren’t a threat because I didn’t smoke then.

Now that I’m a professor, I’ve smoked maybe a half gram to a gram a day, but Friday is my two weeks of not smoking. I’ll have three weeks by the time they do a second interview, and maybe a few days to a week extra before they would hypothetically make the job offer.

The website of the district, as well as current employees of this district have all stated they require a pre-screening urine test.

>I’m definitely not comfortable with substituting or synthetics.
Then you will fail your drug test, you fucking dumbass.

Oh, I’ll certainly do the home test, but doing one today will almost certainly show that I’ll test positive. I don’t even know if I’ll be offered the job, but I do know they only do two rounds of interviews, so I’m not getting my hopes up yet. I haven’t done the first interview yet - that’s this Friday. I have to complete a second interview at some point next week (I’m assuming) before I have to complete the LabCorp test.

are you fucking retarded?

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Hey you'll probably be fine but for $30 dollars and a trip to the store you can have piece of mind in the time it takes to do all that or the information to plan ahead if you fail or are close to failing. Your call.

Doing a home test now when I’m 100% sure I’d fail is just a waste of time and money. I have at least 7-14 days before I would possibly have to take this drug test on top of the 11-12 days I’ve already not smoked. If I get a call next week that they want to do that second and final interview, then I know I need to do a home test with a detox kit and see where I stand before accepting that final interview

So if you don't get caught with weed as a teenager you're retarded? Yeah makes sense

That's still a lot of assumptions. What if you're offered the job after the first interview? What if you have to go take the test immediately afterwards?

They won’t. They are interviewing ten people, and I spent a few hours reviewing interview questions with another employee today and walked me through what to expect. Guaranteed two interviews, the second which is the principal selecting one of two candidates to hire. I’m not certain if it’s immediate, if the principal / administration calls back in 1-3 days to offer the job after that, etc., but I am 100% sure after this interview Friday, two people get sent to a second interview the following week or so. I don’t know if that’ll be next Monday, next Friday, or what.

State laws < Federal laws

The numbers you see around the internet are largely bullshit. It's the upper range of time estimates from manufacturers aka total guesses. The realistic limit is probably more like 2 weeks.

I'd take a home test and see if you can stop stressing.

Yes, I’m aware. It is openly available where I live, but given the nature of this field and the snooty attitude this particular school has, they require tests because they are legally allowed to screen for narcotics.

I wonder if taking regular adderall I’m prescribed helps or hurts my chances with a marijuana urine test.

That is kind of what I’ve been thinking, because I’ve never heard 45-90 days ever until I saw some shitty online calculator for it. While I’m a regular daily smoker, i think I’m still considered a light smoker by how little I smoke at a time.

Doesn’t really matter at this point. I already gave LabCorp the heads up so don’t expect the job.

Had to do a labcorp test recently for a IT job contracting. Buy a jockstrap and spend 100$ on something with a controlled thermostat like "the urinator" . Labcorp will check your belt line but they arent going to touch your junk; there is a temp check on the cup. They ask you leave piss in the toilet and they flush for you. Just get someone clean to piss for you and use that urine instead of a synthetic if you are paranoid.

erowid.org/plants/cannabis/cannabis_testing.shtml

30 days is entirety within the realm of possibility for failing. Sure you might pass now but again you're making assumptions for your livelihood.

o shit I thought we were friends :(

I don’t *need* this job, but it would certainly be nice to make more money closer to home in a less stressful environment. I was hoping for better diet tips and detox solutions in this thread, or what I can do leading up to the day of a urine test from people here, but I should know better with Yea Forums.

I also hope being prescribed adderall, which makes me chug almost a gallon of water a day, sweat like crazy and avoid fatty foods (and fasting most of the day) will help my chances here.

>I also hope being prescribed adderall, which makes me chug almost a gallon of water a day, sweat like crazy and avoid fatty foods (and fasting most of the day) will help my chances here.
Nope, it will only hurt your chances here as you will fail your test for that too

I’m legally prescience adderall. I don’t care if I test positive for that one, I have a doctor’s note for that and they can’t prevent employment based on stating that will be present in advance (I already checked)

*prescribed oops

Hoping doesn't mean shit. The only thing that clears THC out of you is time.If you want people to make you feel better and peddle you bullshit then by all means lap it up. Outside of detox man and "just drink water" meme bros you've been given good advice.

Honestlym you'll probably be fine but the way you're going about it in this thread seems like you're trying to convince yourself you'll be fine instead of listening to useful information.

Do you know what a prescription is?

I think being suggested to take a home test has come up enough that I’ll buy a few after this Friday test to try every few days leading up to the potential employment test. I’m certainly not in such a financial situation that I can’t buy a few. At this point, I guess I’m okay spending whatever to ensure I pass.

Hey there you go. Instead of hoping and well-wishing you're actually taking action.

Good luck hope you get the job.

Thanks! Aside from B12 in the like 72 hours leading up to the actual test, any suggestions on what I should be consuming?

I don't buy any of that bullshit. You're either clean enough to pass or not. If it makes you feel better drink a monster or something and use the middle of your piss.

They’re open till like 4-430pm, so I’m already aware that I don’t give them my first piss of the day, and the later I can take it, the better. I will be ultra hydrated from here on out, so they’ll get a mid-stream piss from me.

Should I worry if they say that it’s too much water for an accurate test? I feel like if I purposely fuck it up by pissing straight water and they make me retake it, I’m just buying time. Do you think pissing straight water would completely invalidate me, or would they just request a second test in like 1-7 days afterwards?

It's entirely possible to have too dilute of a sample and you'll either have to take it again or essentially have failed the drug test.

Hmm. Even without knowing I was going to apply for this job and needed to stop smoking, I naturally consume a ton of water and have a very low body fat percentage (I’d guess I’m currently under 4% - I’m 6ft, 150ish pounds with barely a 32” waist) so I am hoping my low body fat and generally fast metabolism would work in my favor.

From my research and experience, you will probably piss clean after a week of just saying no to the drugs.

Yes they test for dilution (specific gravities) and I have had to retest because of this.

My advice to you:

If you pass home test, piss away with no worries because you will definitely pass the actual test.

If you fail home test, smuggle in either someone else's clean piss or the synthetic piss. Don't worry, its very easy to sneak in. I've had to do this a few times. Also FYI I've tested the temperature and found you don't need any heating device to keep it warm (they check if its in the right temp range). What I've done is warmed the clean piss at home (borrowed a friend's), put it in a plastic bottle and kept it snug in my taint. Stays nice and cozy and warm up in there. I have somewhat chubby thighs, so the bottle might not stay there the best if you're very skinny, but you can test it out. I used a rogaine bottle i had washed out and the size/shape worked very well.

Yes, I am a balding, chubby, pot addicted, piss begging taint smuggler, but trust my advice because i passed every test with flying colors. And so will you!

Even after the final interview, if it’s a piss test, they give you 48 hrs to take it. Mouth swab you’d def already pass. To fail a piss test you’d of had to have been snoop dog to still fail at 150lbs after 15~ days. Fucking google this shit next time

could try exercising heavily as well to catabolize some fat. the increased cardiac output would probably cause help excrete more of the thc metabolites. But at 11 days, and probably hit 13 or 14 before you need to pee i'd say you're probably safe.

Even if you get the job, you're fucked. You're addicted to pot, they'll notice it, and you'll end up getting fired.

I'm in a similar boat to yours OP, but I'm about 6'6" and 165lbs. I'll be getting word of whether or not I get the job by friday, and then the drug test would come next week. I'm about three and a half weeks into abstaining (would most likely be hitting four weeks by the time I take the test) and I pretty much only drink water and exercise daily. That being said, I'm almost certainly buying a home piss test tomorrow just to see where I stand.

LabCorp is one of the biggest reference laboratories in the US. You will not pass the test. I'd re-schedule.
Lab tech here.

no one watches you pee.
they will make you empty your pockets.

buy either quickfix or dr greens agent orange and a knee brace. put the knee brace on your upper thigh with the fake urine and of course follow the instructions. you will pass. synthetic urines are so reliable a lot of states have outlawed them.

dr greens agent X sorry

smile.amazon.com/Easy-Marijuana-Single-Panel-Tests/dp/B00UCKDHIA/ref=sr_1_4?crid=11G9RB0ALUNJO&keywords=thc drug test&qid=1554355693&s=gateway&sprefix=thc ,aps,192&sr=8-4

I've used these before and they've been fairly accurate

discord
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