Need some advice Yea Forums, I dont know how to react anymore. Im sure you went through this at least once and maybe you can give me some hints.
>Dating a girl. I already know all her girlfriends and even family -parents and sisters- >From one day she starts saying she has problems with her life (work and all those things) and I notice she starts talking less. >Its been like this since 4 days. Yesterday I asked her what its happening and she told me she needs some time for thinking, that its not my fault, she wants to think if she is ready to be into a relationship, she doesnt want to hurt me above all and its just her fault. >She wants to talk in person and doesnt want me to overthink it, that she needs to think about her life and all that crap. She doesnt want to be selfish and think with a cool head. >I also asked if she already took a decision and she answered no.
So now Ive been fucked up, I cant focus on anything just thinking all the damn time about this. I cant wait any longer but at the same time I dont want to keep texting her or pressing when we are going to meet. What can I do? If she wanted to break up she would already told me so.
I was/am in a similar situation user. Don't keep pressing her despite how much you want to text her. You don't want to end up driving he away. Just find other shit to distract yourself and stay engaged in homework, chores, work, games, etc.
Samuel Barnes
I know, Im trying to stay distracted with videogames and other things but this is really hard. Specially when you keep reading all the messages trying to find an explanation.
I guess I will have to keep waiting, messaging her and putting her pressure with this would be worse.
Bentley Jackson
Yeah, it really sucks having to wait user, I know the feel.
With the girl I'm involved with, her life is constantly falling to shit. She broke up with her last boyfriend who she loved/lived with because he cheated on her. Then a month later I asked her out and we really hit it off. It was incredible for a week where we had sex almost every day and really connected emotionally. Then she began to push me away. We tried pausing, taking a break, but we kept coming back to each other.
So ultimately I wanted to move forward but she was really ambivilant, just couldn't make up her mind. So I finally said that we're going to take a month break where she can heal and do her thing and we'll officially try it out at the end of the month.
Try not to ruminate too much and assume that it'll end at some point. Hope for the best but prepare for the worst. That'll help you catch yourself if you fall. Just don't talk to any other girls in the mean time and you should be fine.
Liam Wilson
Good luck you too user. I hate when girls are this unstable, they dont make any sense at all. Last weekend it was my birthday and she prepared everything, she seemed so attached to me. But then out of the blue this starts to happen. They always say its not our fault, its just hers but at the end you always know something else is going on.
Im already prepared just in case she decides to stay on her own. At least she says she want to talk in person.. other girls Ive been with decided to just break up by message.
Anyway, thanks. I'll keep waiting and trying to stay away from the cellphone as much as possible.
Aaron Rogers
ok seriously user, i have a lot of experience with this kind of shit. gotta make a decision here. If there are other options, decide whether or not this is worth your effort. If it is, just leave her her space. Completely. If she gives you any sign that she's not interested in dating or there may be someone else, cut it off but amicably, dont burn the bridge. Best thing you can do now is just ignore your overthinking and chill, do not overtext her. but honestly this doesnt sound worth your effort
Josiah Gonzalez
Good on you user. Yeah, I've found that girls are actually aware of how emotional they can get. And they can get afraid of how attached they're becoming to potential romantic partners, especially if they've been hurt in the past.
It is really considerate of her to talk to you face to face. Most girls are to scared or to callous to do that.
If it ends up that she needs more time but you want to pursue it than maybe suggest a break like I did. If that's the case then just make sure you dont' hold your breath during the break, but do follow up.
Im an old guy and have had a lot of girlfriends. The ones with issues and emotional problems are a pain in the ass. Dont get too attached. Keep her around, but not too close. Be on the lookout for a new girl. You will be much happier
Thomas Jackson
I was in a similar situation. Girl and I obv had feelings for each other. I slept with her and spent the night with warning signs that seem obvious in retrospect. If she seems unstable you have to protect yourself first. If she can’t event regulate her own feelings, how can you trust her to take care of yours? I’d say you need give yourself space and don’t wait on her for anything.
