Hey Yea Forums. I have an issue that I've struggled with for over a decade now. I'm an intelligent...

Hey Yea Forums. I have an issue that I've struggled with for over a decade now. I'm an intelligent, good-looking guy with a healthy social circle of friends. I can talk to women just fine. But something that absolutely destroys my confidence is that 9 times out of 10, I have trouble getting and maintaining an erection.

This started happening ever since it happened the first time with my girlfriend my sophomore year in college. It like devastated her ("oooh am I not attractive to you??" as she sobbed in the bathtub) and she broke up with me and told all of her friends. It destroyed my confidence. I really have to harness the rush of doing it quickly, like picking up a chick from the bar for a one night stand basically because the longer something drags on like a long distance text setup ends up putting too much pressure on me and I freak out and can't get it up.

It fucking sucks.

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sorry to hear. post more of those newds

have you tried getting it diagnosed? as in, is it you've got ED, or are you simply too nervous to get it pumping?

Jacking off too much

>Tell her your dick has a mind of its own and it goes soft for like, no good reason
>buy a few different sized dildos and a hitachi vibrator, tell her you’ll make it up to her
>never hear them complain again

Nerves. I am not a virgin. I’ve pulled some very attractive women, including some models and I’m not saying that to boast. I can get it up when I watch porn. And this was happening when I was in great shape too. It’s all mental.

Quit porn, and with it any unnatural sexual stimulus. Quit masturbating (not cumming, masturbating altogether) for at least two months in a streak. If you fail, take note of the reasons and start over.
Check out PIED (porn induced erectile dysfunction), Your Brain On Porn. Don't check out /r/NoFap, it's a bunch of fanatics who don't know shit seriously.

>Your Brain On Porn

Why 2 months?

Once you are on a good way to rewire your sexual chase circuit, work on your whole wellbeing. Sex is a drive in our system, but if the system perceives a threat, the drive is put back until safety; unfortunately, anxiety is our physiological representation of threat and rational safety may never result in complete relaxation. Work out your problems, investigate the way your mind works. Find a good therapist, and don't take pills without counselling. Don't let yourself be stigmatised for caring for your mind as you would for your body, for they are a whole. Eat well, sleep well, work out, meditate, drink sencha, all the stuff.

Quit masturbating for at least two months. Not porn. Porn should be quit forever.

Two months was to outline a definite, reasonable goal for a beginner. As a good rule of thumb you should quit at least until you experience night cumming.
As a side note, if you ever get sleepiness hard-ons or morning woods or you find yourself hard if woken up in the middle of the night, it means that the hydraulics of your schlong work fine, and that it's the whole system around it that needs to be dealt with. Mostly the brain.
I also recommend checking out the YouTube channel "What I've Learned", interesting, relevant stuff.

It'd be easier if bitches didn't have Snapchat..

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thanks. Have you had these problems?

I know mate, quitting porn is harder than cigarettes, especially if you are alone. But it can be done, and once you succeed in a streak it's good self-esteem for your willpower. My longest has been three months, and back in the day I wouldn't have bet a dime on myself.
Ask me anything about it, I'm not a success story yet but I believe I'm on a somehow right track.

I mean, can you relate?

Do you slowly ween yourself off it? I've managed to kick my alcohol habit, a weed habit and a cigarette habit. Now I have to kick the porn. It's proving hard to kick porn especially with phones capable of accessing it within seconds.

I had my perfect kind of girl and I couldn't get it up for my fucking life. Worst is, I couldn't enjoy sex. I enjoyed sex like three times in four years. I am some kind of anhedonic all around, really.
When I managed to get hard was with super-intense mental stimuli, so it was on a constant edge between premature ejaculation and being insensitive again. It's shit.
No, you quit cold turkey. You need to accept the fact that you have to. It's not a matter of availability, that can be made harder but you can't restrict yourself completely without losing your dignity. You need to want it.

What was the solution?

I'm still a long way, but see first posts.

viagra nigga

I've been there op.
You're worrying too much about how you are perceived by your partners.
In moderation this is good of course, but in your case it obviously damages more than it's useful.

I don't know about all those "stop jerking it" dudes, but your main goal would be simply to care a bit less about your image, if you are like me.

I've had that problem with the first five women I've landed in bed with, till i had a drunken one night stand where I hadn't had a care in the world , and then it just went well from then on because I stressed myself out less.
If that's what it takes for you to, I'd say Viagra might be an alternative, that's not just for old men anymore mate.
I'd recon 2-3 times with that stuff and then you're good

This guy again.
Also you should be proud of yourself more for all the other things that go well in your life, that just might help too

It’s not that I care about my image. A good relationship needs to have a fulfilling sexual element and I’m psyching myself out. I’m tired of having awesome nights with women that have disastrous endings.