Help me with my tinder bio. Shits weak

Help me with my tinder bio. Shits weak

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ooof, start with that thing in the picture, remove that and never publish it again.

Are you gay?

This. Don't have a selfie as your picture. Only if you're a fat fuck.

Okay now what? I'm not gay

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bio doesnt matter. get better pics. preferably candid ones that make you look engaged in something / like a real person. dont post selfies or scripted pictures. if you dont have friends that can take pictures of you like that, maybe you have other issues to sort out before opting for tinder.

Fuck it. This shit is stupid. Idk why I keep downloading this app every 6 months.

First picture should be a group picture in a social outing that makes you seem like you actually have a social life, then you can have a genuine selfie. Bio isn't that important, but if you're trying to do better than the weak shit you got, talk about how you're either social and go out a bunch with friends or career driven and going to become successful in the future. Good luck, user.

i’m fully opposed to the notion of people marketing themselves like commodities in every interaction they have, including relational and sexual interactions. this shit is the pinnacle of that and should be avoided at all costs

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To get their dick wet.

Fine. Just remember to never waste time on girls out of your league.

Not true. First pic should be just you. This is what all the research says.

i dont understand your reply man. are you replying to a question i didnt pose? lol

fuck off fag king. faggot faggy fag nigger faggot kike

Are you Mexican?

What research? I keep getting hyped off those YouTube videos where they meme around and btfo girls or actually fuck and then I get on there and it's dead. I just wanna have fun and maybe get lucky.

i had the best luck with

"i eat ass on the first date"

HUNK HUNK

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Your profile should be written as if you don't give a fuck and can't be bothered to respond anyway

Is it that easy to tell? I'm half but look full white. I wish I had the constitution for suicide.

there’s something they have that you dont, that you will never learn because they’ll never tell you. find friends with better camera quality or delete tinder

also, you’re not getting responses because >android

>i look full white
>(((plainly looks beaner and is asked if he's beaner)))
You live in SoCal don't you? You're white for SoCal. You're beaner for everywhere white.

>first picture should be a group picture
*swipe left*

Whom*. Fucking kids these days.

Elaborate?

Have some tits from the last time I got laid.

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Do people believe gay shit like this? I have a shitty $45 Android and over 1,000 matches. I bang 3 random bitches off there per week. Sometimes more sometimes less.

Wew. Self loathing on the rise.

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San Diego or LA?

Bakersfield lol

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The thing that got my girl interested was the line "What the fuck qualifies as an adventure?!"
Maybe try that OP

"I'm only here for hook-ups and unicorns."

Do not try to have a texting conversation with anyone who matches with you. Proceed directly to making plans to meetup some place y'all can fuck.

If she tries to have a conversation or suggests more than slapping your meats together, play along if it's interesting. Leave her on read if it isn't.

Your shit is lacking OP.

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ez.

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this way it starts a myriad of conversations
>Haha your ass is better than mine
oh really? I gotta see that to believe it
>wtf were you doing?
going to pornceptual
>wow, you must have a good artist friend
I did it almost all myself and the design, want me to paint all over you?

it's interesting and sexy, and usually I only get quirky nymph matches so exactly what I'm after

is that reviewbrah?

If you're not this guy, you don't stand a chance.

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"Open minded"

Kek!

"i validate myself with arbitrary numbers"

>arbitrary
>because the figure does not physically correlate to hoards of women
Lul

Yeah OP
I just deleted and downloaded tinder on Saturday. Have candids. And don't swipe on anybody for the first 3 days. If you rapid swipe, tinder thinks you're a bot and won't show you to anyone

Attached: Screenshot_20190325-060311_Tinder.jpg (1080x2220, 584K)

Gonna wait till tuesday to start swiping

Oh and chicks don't like cigarettes anymore. You'll probably get immediate swipe left when they see that cigarette

Aaahahaha

That stubble

Oh man you look like you take so much cock

No one likes cigarettes anymore. They're for low IQ street trash.

This also is true.

Some chicks are really superficial to the point where they won't reply to anyone who has an android as to an iPhone. This is rare but honestly is a bullet dodged, you don't ever want a chick in your life who's that into "status".

>won't reply to anyone who has an android as to an iPhone
I also don't give a fuck about consumerist gutter whores such as these, but I'm curious, are you implying they have a reason to know you're on Android? Unless your phone is in a selfie I guess.
Saw some chicks bio once that said "if you have an Android swipe left, I don't like green messages." I swiped left. But is that a thing? I presume only via text message if so? Surely not over tinder?

Nah over tinder they won't know unless they ask in the conversation. Then they might ghost once they find out. But again, bullet dodged.

So it does over text then?
This is clearly a feature designed by Apple to divide the market and imply some superiority to their users.

When texting through phones iPhone to iPhone wil have blue colored messages, iPhone to android is green. So they'll immediately know once you exchange numbers. As to the reason, couldn't say

Marketing is the reason.
Gay.

Very gay yeah but honestly like everytime it got brought up that I'm "team android" it was usually followed by playful banter.