What are you going to do if you win the powerball tonight?

>Pay off debts.
>Pay off family (2.5m to parents, 3 to sister) so I can cut ties without them thinking I'm just a scumbag, or trying to follow me and beg.
>Mercedes and house in the area until I'm off probation.
Yeah, I'm on probation, wanna fight about it?
>Hire an architect and co-design an epic fortress of solitude.
>Travel a lot to find the right city to build it in.
>Oh, and fuck loads of prostitutes.
>Lots of prostitutes.
>Like... A LOT of prostitutes.
>...
>I'm not sure you comprehend how many prostitutes I'm talking about.

buy an island in a warm climate
set up worlds largest whore house
sample the wares several times a day

Buy /b and delete it so I can finally quit this hell hole.

Two chicks at the same time

Die, because I'm not that lucky.

I've done that with two high quality escorts for just $500CAD. Twice! Good times.

Didn't buy a ticket but my lottery dream is to start a farm and have like 500+ acres of hunting and fishing land and see how much I can self provide while letting the money grow

Buy my brother and his new wife a house, buy a vacation home for my family to go to when we want.

Buy a house in a different state for myself with a secret ABDL nursery. Get in really good shape. Convince a couple of 18 year old littles to come live with me, where I'll keep them in diapers 24/7.

Imma buy the mine I work at and blow it to hell.

Flood the pit with mud and silt and then blow up the rubble that is left over from the initial explosion.

Use some of the proceeds to obtain a small nuclear weapon that I can put into a box truck an create the ultimate VBIED terrorist weapon. Allahu Ackbar!!!

pay off my parent's and my mortgages, pay off my student loans, find someone to help me invest half of it, put the other half in a savings account

Why the fuck would you need to invest it? Even at the highest tax rate, it's $225 million. Why would you need more?

Is probably buy a $400,000 house, A $30,000 car or 2, invest a couple mil, then just be goofy as fuck with the rest. Pay a midget to follow someone for a week, buy tables at comic cons and sell horrible doodles, make funny tv ads, ya know. Weird dumb shit. Oh! And I’d buy a few sugar babies. Always wanted a sexy young girl to be completely dependent on me. That’d be nice.

buy however much money that is, in lottery tickets

I dunno, only like $300m after taxes and bullshit....

>affordable
>CO

Ok..... but you’re wrong

fair point, then I'd go to LA and fuck a bunch of gold diggers

>buy tables at comic cons
That'd be great. Sell expensive comic books for super cheap, but secretly hide anti Jewish propaganda inside. They nerds will never take off the protective plastic, so they will never know.
But you will, user. You will.
Money.
Well.
Spent.

$255, even. And good on ya.

Rent a few months, like 8, and then buy a house and eat good food and then sleep a lot and wake up to good sounds and make out with many women. Jk just eat with them and talk trash about the non powerball winners.

Wopee!

gonna immediately spend every dollar on more tickets

The big lotteries are 100% rigged. The "winners" are preselected and the machines are fixed. No real regular person ever wins the jackpots.

>Invest in everything Trump invests in.
>Go broke in a week.

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great nip tbh

Buy a house
Fill it with hookers
tie them up
film them getting fucked
charge a fee at the door

Please put my name on the guest list: Rusty Shackleford.

Get a couple thots, never work again, do lots of drugs and chill all day everyday

Probably help a few people in need as well, help homeless people get back on their feet

Donate $5 million to a university with a stipulation ... I get to select the name of a building on campus.

buy 10square miles of nowwhere wyoming and disappear. Hire a maid to come out and clean the place once a week, a nurse to come out the same day to give me a check up, and a thai hooker at 7pm sharp to blow me on that very day. Other than that I want to be left the hell alone, read books, and drink beer while I do wood working and ride horses. Maybe give a couple of million to my folks/brothers/3 friends just to set them up before I fuckoff.

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Are you that black guy in probation that always shitposts?

Prove it.

I'm not black, but I have posted about being on probation before. What are these posts about?

Jack it in San Diego

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Om from the future, these are the winning numbers 4 8 15 16 23 42

Nigger, the powerball itself only goes up to 26. Trust me i know, I’m a stupid nigger that plays it.

You look lost.

Kill OP

Let's say I was retarded and bought a lotto ticket.
>Buy large amount of land out around Montana
>Build 3 large metal pole barns for 3 different functions: My home, a hotel and a great hall like the Norse had.
>Run power lines to the location, same with cable or fiber.
Start building my empire.

To what end?

If you don't play you can't lose!

>Wants to build an empire.
Damn, I’d support that.

>spends 255 million to possibly win 27 million
I like the vision

You know what I would do if I had a million dollars? I would invest half of it in various mutual funds and take the other half over to my friend Asadulah who

8329

Since I own all the land I should be able to lease it as I see fit. So if I say put in plots for trailers on the edge far from main buildings with all required hookups I can control my neighborhood.
I can even do small but fully equipped cabins and rent them out or have as extended stay. Some will be permanent like family if they want to retire up there.
I figure I have about 5-10 years before the first Somalian will show up wanting gibs. Need to have everything in place to keep them out.

how much did gook moot pay for Yea Forums?
if i could afford it i would buy Yea Forums, get rid of all of the ads, a few jannies, robots,and /lgbt/,
id leave it to someone i know wouldnt fuck it back up and then i would commit suicide
and i would do it anonymously

>Not buying it to shut it all down and free us from this evil
You heartless bastard.

I'd build a bunch of shelters for homeless people/families in every major US City, serve them breakfast & dinner, give them access to computers for job search, & free bus passes, so they can get their lives back on track.

Drug addicts & drunks need not apply, sorry losers.

Transportation for cheap, to work & various stores for working folks.

I truly would do this, of course I wouldn't manage the places, I'd just make sure they all got private rooms, security, food, & given a chance to rebuild or for elderly, they could donate part of their monthly SEO / Disability check to support the community.

Too many homeless now & nobody is doing enough to help out. :(

What a fucking waste.

Most of you have no fucking clue how much $300m in cash is
>hurr durr
>i buy house and some property
>pay off my dept
>put it in savings account muh interest
>lol hookers
Niggers, $300m in cash is a fuck ton more than most paper billionaires will ever see. That is "establish an independent firm of accountants and lawyers solely for the purpose of managing your personal accounts" amount of money.

If you bought a ticket surely God would make sure you won, right?

I would hire a different model to tongue my anus every night.

Throatfuck an 18 year old after I save up a weeks worth of cum

Why do I need a firm to watch a checking account?

You can do that for $20 in Bangkok.

if you are on probation, aren't prostitutes a no no?

what is the cash option?

You do understand that a majority of the homeless problem is because the government cut many mental health programs overloading the already over taxed system. The issue resides in you have to split the categories of those who can be helped and those who are lost causes forever otherwise your money will dry up fast.
Just think, every homeless has to be checked for lice, bed bugs, etc.. Cleaned up and have most of their belongings burned because washing wont cover it. Some will knife you just for touching a plastic bag.

Yes, obviously that's after.

what about starting your own private porn company, make movies of yourself fucking the hottest stars. keep the movies for yourself.

i dont play the lottery,but if i did and won it.id move to a country that isnt america.since there a year away from being fucked by socialism because americans are retarded and cant vote for people who actually can improve their country

Might want to look into how many stars have oral herps and more. You'd be surprised at how much they are hiding sleeping with each other.

Dude... You're no wrong, but L2punctuation.

Nigga 50% of people get cold sores. HSV1 ain't shit.

why would you want to go to a cesspool like california lol.have fun with your ugly fat feminists and lesbians,which are the only "women" you'll see in democrat states

>$300m
>in one account
>a checking account
Good fucking luck with that.

>affordable

>liberal state

choose 1

Are there not big banks that have options for large accounts? Why not? Jews. That's why.

>Expensive
>255 million USD

Fucking kek

there's some black guy who got done for a DUI that makes a thread the same time every night crying for sympathy.

I. Gonna pay back that uncle that moslesded me as a child.
Sorry Yea Forums the money in those threads I gave you, you have to pay back as well

I would open a weed dispensary and give everyone here free weed.

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Nope. Identity theft here. And still white.

>red state
>healthy economy
Choose 1. Also, you forgot to drop reddit format you fucking shill.

Just one? I would get five and make them cum-swap my jizz. Then I would let my dog mount one and have a good time.

>not simply chartering a private jet and flying to a country where they won’t extradite you
It won’t really matter. My guess is you only accelerate the destruction of your life your currently engaged if you had the money.

I mean, it's only a year left. I'd need that time to design my house anyway.
I'm not a dope fiend or an alcoholic. I just love pussy. If it we're socially acceptable I would drape myself in pussy.

>If things go well I’ll be her showin her my o face.... OHHHH!!! OHHHH!! OOHHH!!!
Sort your fuckin’ life out. Do yourself a favor. See. This. Movie.

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Donate all the proceeds to AOC's democratic campaign

You’re a complete fucking fagatron.

Your poor fag California and the $200,000,000 version is just a little different to say the least.

I've seen it. I've also had my cock in each of these girls mouths. Guess which was better?

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>and make out with many women
>make out
>wopee
So you’re ten and posting from Bible camp right?

I’d buy a university and then close the fucking doors the next day

I don’t believe it. Those thread have to copypasta.

I was buying it at first but no way that’s real. It’s been going on for too long.

Buy a university and make people pay to get in.

Im going to build a wall and make Mexico pay for it! I will recoup my money and earn some over time.

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Sticking the ticket up my ass for save keeping

>tattoos
>nose piercing
I dunno and don’t care. Did they at least run a midweek “penicillin special”?

No one one the jackpot. Wednesday's jackpot is $353.7 million cash (before state taxes).
Good luck everyone.

Then how come you didn’t get the reference? Are you that desperate to tell people you paid for pussy?

Actually the condom slipped off inside the left one. I'm still clean as a whistle.
Been with 20+ working girls with no issues.

>I'm not a dope fiend or an alcoholic
>other than that I’m just a convicted criminal;isn’t everyone?
No

Well, I saw it years ago. And yes, I want prostitution legalized.

>healthy economy
>incredibly high cost of living

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Probably go fuck a prostitute and streak in a hospital.

Yup. One misdemeanor committed as part of a suicide attempt is my whole life over. How will I ever recover from this downward spiral? Surely $300million wouldn't help.

I want it legalized too. I don’t know why that means you should be desperate to tell people you paid top dollar to bang some nasty skanks.

At least no one else got it tonight.
>Get the prize in annuity
>Pay off my own and my family's debts
>Set aside some scholarship money for all the kids in my extended family
>Send my sister to graduate school/a famous theatre program
>Start building up my post-annuity and retirement funds
>Get a house for my mom, with room for me
>FINALLY celebrate the occasion with getting a tattoo and burning money at a brothel
>Snag tickets for the upcoming Olympics whenever they're released
>Keep stashing set amounts of money for the next 29 years into my funds
>Give my parents, their siblings and living grandparents enough money for them to retire each year
>Invest on low-interest stuff
>Splurge with the rest
>Repeat until I come up with better plans

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Well, you won't believe me, but if you met them, you would not think of them as skanks. You probably wouldn't get to meet them though, as their screening process is rigorous.
Just want people to know what's out there, and that you don't have to be a millionaire to get it.
You do have to be white though.

Look man. You fucked your life up with whatever money you had. You would fuck it up 300 million times faster.

You know how often people’s lives are destroyed by winning the lotto? Some studies have shown 75% are bankrupt within five years. Everyone thinks they can beat those odds. Most are wrong. If your life is fucked before the dick only gets bigger. Here is just one article. There are endless stories.

google.com/amp/s/www.nydailynews.com/life-style/tragic-stories-lottery-winners-article-1.2492941?outputType=amp

I could never bring myself to take the annuity. They way this shit hole state (NY) is going, I wouldn't be surprised if in two years they said "Well, were broke from all this socialism, so we're going to take back all lottery payments".
Yeah, I know it probably couldn't work that way, but I couldn't live with that paranoia.

>Well, you won't believe me, but if you met them, you would not think of them as skanks.
I think of girls covered in tattoos and nose rings as skanks yes.
>You probably wouldn't get to meet them though, as their screening process is rigorous.
Ohh excuse me Diamond Jim. I didn’t realize I was dealing with Richard fuckin Gere here. How exclusive. How will I ever recover that I don’t get to pay top dollar to fuck whores kek.

>You fucked your life up with whatever money you had.
Yup, totally fucked up having no money. You're absolutely right, despite not knowing anything about the situation.

Illinoisan here. The faggot that was posting earlier about liberal states have thriving economies? Uh not Illinois. They go through periods where they tell lottery winners to get fucked until the come up the money somewhere down the road.

I kept on daydreaming what I'd do with hundreds of millions of dollars given to me at once, until I realized I don't really want to handle that much. $15 million by itself could help me solve my relevant problems; getting that each year for the next thirty years is a staggering enough prospect.
Besides, living in Nevada is a blessing considering I wouldn't be taxed on income.

Cash Value: $465.5 Million is what the website says

I didn't consider that. Could be much worse considering I'm playing from the California Lottery.
Again, $15 million would help me take care of a lot.

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See? Fuck that.

can I move to a tax free state before I collect the money?

That's before 25% federal tax.

usamega.com/powerball-jackpot.asp

You'd have to claim the prize from the district in which you bought your ticket, but I suppose you could. I know jackpot winners in California have 180 days to claim their prizes.

Look man. I, at one time, drank every dime my wife and I had away. Guess who’s fault that was?

You completely give off a vibe of absolutely nothing being your fault and shit just “happening” to you. You are on probation, tried to commit suicide, but didn’t fuck your life up? Ok. You sound like you are in complete denial.

So as I said shit just “happens” to you.
>Yup, totally fucked up having no money.
Uh yeah guy I didn’t say that did I?

>usamega.com/powerball-jackpot.asp
Your net payout: $313,048,750 md sucks!

You will have to pay. Think of lottery prizes as regular earned income from a job. Just because you may work in a different state, that doesn't permit you to get away with not paying state income tax in your state of residence. The lottery works the same way.

Whether it's income from a job or income from gambling, the state where the money is won will tax the prize first at their out-of-state tax rate (assuming the state taxes lottery winnings). If your state of residence has the same or lower tax rate, then you won't owe anything else. But if your state has a higher rate, you will get a credit for what you paid in the other state, and pay the difference to your state.

If the other state has no tax, you just pay the entire tax bill to your state.

The net result is that you end up paying whichever tax rate is higher between your state of residence and the state where you purchased the ticket. Of course, the tax law is quite complex and it's possible that some condition or arrangement exists between the two states and a good tax attorney and/or accountant could discover a tax-saving loophole. That's why we always recommend that major prize winners do not make any major decisions before first hiring a good legal and financial team.

One other option to consider, depending on how much in taxes you're looking to save: the residency requirements as they relate to prize claims, state taxes, and income reporting. Since you aren't responsible for paying taxes until you claim the prize, perhaps there is time to establish residency in the state where you purchased the ticket before the prize claim period expires. However, that is something you would definitely need to explore with an attorney before taking any action to assess the feasibility. You would also need to decide if it would be worth the risk of that important little piece of paper not getting lost, damaged, or destroyed in the time you spend arranging everything.

jesus Christ only ny has a higher tax rate, fuck my state sucks

are you a fucking tax lawyer or something?

Nah, man. I made a mistake while I was depressed. I KNOW I made a mistake. I refuse to let assholes like your alcoholic ass tell me the rest my life is fucked up because of one mistake.

>Yup, totally fucked up having no money.
>Uh yeah guy I didn’t say that did I?
You literally did.
>You fucked your life up with whatever money you had

Fine with me. $11.5 million per year is still plenty to work with.

NYC has the highest at 12.68. 308.9 mil is the cash prize.

No, but I did just stay at a Holiday Inn.
usamega.com/powerball-faq.asp

>Nah, man. I made a mistake while I was depressed. I KNOW I made a mistake. I refuse to let assholes like your alcoholic ass tell me the rest my life is fucked up because of one mistake.
>telling you you fuck your life up
>telling you 300 million would destroy you
Uh yeah. Totally same thing.

>you fucked up your life with whatever money you had
>you fucked up your life with no money
Clearly the exact same statement.

You seem very sensitive. By the way. I haven’t had a drink in over seven years so nice try with the alcoholic jab. If you think I give a fuck you’re sorely mistaken.

I honestly wasn’t trying to piss on your parade. I was just trying to playfully troll with the first comment because you seemed like you had a “fuck it” attitude about your probation. It went too far and I apologize.

Whatever man. I'm just in a real shitty mood about it because I'm trying to put shit back together and it keeps falling apart anyway. Have a good night. I hope you get raped to death with a red hot iron spike.

I’ll do that then. BTW the way out is yourself. It ain’t the rest of the world.... it’s you. Took me a long time to figure that out. Accept and be free. Reject it and continue to suffer.

It may sound harsh but it’s true. Take care friend and I truly am sorry I was a dick to you.

Buy 2 fast cars.. crash one.

$100,000,000 per person is the price of a place in the sanctuary before the global cleansing begins. Even then, you may not qualify. Money will be useless afterwards, anyway

Pay a virgin everyday

To...?

The same virgin?

Fuck a virgin, everyday

oh you know

Meet mark cuban & date Ivanka Trump

Then go to prison for soliciting prostitution of a minor, get raped then shanked to death in the shower. Great plan, Moron

Why did your mind immediately think the virgin was underaged? Do you have something you need to get off your chest?

Build the wall

Kek

Move to México
Eat tacos everyday

I don't know where you're from but if you think you are going to find a virgin who's over 18 and willing to have sex with your dumbass on a daily basis, it can't be anywhere like where i'm from. then you start projecting pedo shit on me, Admit it, you like 'em young don't you.

Buy 100m in land, hydrogen powered truck, hydrogen powered car, and put the rest into low risk mutual funds. I'd spend the earned interest and revenue generation from the land on philanthropy

fuck your mom

I'm not the original user, but let's think it through.I have $300million. I advertise, or find their advertiments, then I go to them. Soon I become the guy who deflowers girls for money. They'll be lining up for it.
And it's not the same girl every day.

If we had a Powerball pool thread id on god would %30% with the people participating. Winner keeps the %70
%% then 30% gets divided amongst the other plebs

If you think you can't find that then you have no idea how easy most women are.

How the fuck would that work?

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I do. that's why i'm saying you wouldn't find it very easy to find a virgin everyday (over 18) most of em are getting ploughed at 15 these days, any virgins over 18 are going to be total munters or jesus freaks, probably both

I too would fuck his mom

it's still prostitution and as a habitual offender you'd be going to jail

Well, yeah, everyday would be impossible...

Then I spend my money changing the law. It's unconstitutional anyway.

there is a loophole tho, film it and put it online, that way it's porn, not prostitution. still, good luck find a 18 year old virgin you'd actually want to fuck

>accept the winnings anonymously (legal in my state)
>tell friends/coworkers im accepting teaching job overseas
>actually leave country
>ghost everyone
>enjoy life somewhere else

Bangkok is fun if you can stand the weather.

bribe my way into a good university like all the rich people do...

Underage b&

based

Fake my death, cut my hair, change my name and move the fuck away after I claim it.

Invest, and try to spend it wisely. I'll probably buy my wife and son a puppy. Maybe I'll try to buy my daughters love back, but I'm sure that will backfire.

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Fucking retard.