Easiest, painless and effective suicide. What’s the best option...

carbon monoxide

or helium

Yeah I could go down into the garage and just turn on the car. It’s shared with my neighbor, you think he’d wake up?

if you really want to stay on couch probably an overdose of some kind, cant help you with wich to choose. pick your favorite drug i guess.

not after its too late probably.

are you sure tho? why no more will to live?

I keep putting a bag over my head and trying to breath slow but I panic before it gets close

Girlfriend lied about being a sugar baby and fucking some Jewish producer for 2 years before she met me. My legal career isn’t what I expected, I have no friends left in this world. I feel bad leaving my parents behind but I don’t see the depression ever ending now matter how much I try

Exit bag.

Look it up, God hates a lazy sack of shit.

Nearly everyone who survives a suicide attempt goes on to live a worthwhile life. Your pain is real, but the idea that it's permanent almost certainly isn't.

Call eight hundred 273 8255. (It's the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline.) They'll point you in the right direction to get some help. Please call. I've been there. Give it a try. Please.

Depression is an illness. Illnesses can be treated. Get some immediate help, then run through the algorithm here.

slatestarcodex.com/2014/06/16/things-that-sometimes-help-if-youre-depressed/

That fucking sucks what your girlfriend did, and isolation is a killer. Don't let the people who hurt you win. Get help, please.

Don’t kill yourself guy. Why put the people you love through that? Get some help don’t be a depressed pussy.

Who the fuck has helium laying around christ

I’ve been at this point in my life 6 times, got close but never went through with it

>99%effective
if you're in that strangely normal 1% i've seen on television, you're in for a bad fucking time.

Go get on some antidepressants? Been there done that, this comes and goes every other week I’m ready for it to be done

Fuck.. the other suggestions in this thread are super lame...

Dude, it's really easy. Get some helium or some other type of "rare gas". Inhale it (with some mask or what ever). You'll feel happy and drunk for some seconds then you'll lose consciousness. After some minutes you'll be dead. 0 pain, 0 mess

Happy travels

drugs

Appreciate the supportive comments. If I had helium I’d be dead right now, I pray to god that I can figure this out. Besides I know if I did this I’d ruin my family’s life and drive my girlfriend to suicide. I’m trapped in this relationship i want to leave her so bad and the last time I did that she tried to hang herself fuck me

You have all of eternity to not exist. Why start early?

Any party store you fucking retard.

How about instead of being a fucking pussy that can't handle your current situation you be a fucking chad and tell your girlfriend to fuck off and go pursue what actually makes you fucking happy in life.

It's better than giving up and being a faggot to your dog and your family

I wanted it done tonight, let me hop over to party city and break in.

>THIS TENDS TO FAIL IF UR GONNA DO IT DON'T DO THIS

I’m yet to find a woman that isn’t some used up slut that’s fucked at least 10 men, I have to go back to church and find a decent woman.

Be a chad? Great meme advice bud

Then drown yourself in the sink. You can't have everything you want this second, you fucking baby.

Oh and you live with a dead ex girlfriend who killed her self over you. This girls a knock out, but fucking crazy used up trash

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Stand over a sink and drown myself? Christ this might as well be a slide thread. Was hoping for an easy way out but arguing with you faggots makes me realize morons continue in this life a lot easier than those with some intelligence

Sex isn't everything in life bud, this bitch sounds worthless and you shouldn't waste your brain cells giving a flying fuck about her

What are you passionate about user? Go pursue that to its fullest extent

You already got good answers on how to end it, you're either baiting or you're being a pussy that doesn't actually wanna die

enjoy 3-4 wodka shots straight up in ur veins and u ll be fine

Licensed to practice law in California, doubled my income in last 6 months and I’ve never felt more hollow. Where the fuck do I find a decent untainted Stacy? All I want is children and I’m not spreading my seed with some used up cunt

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just dont miss you fucking brain

lol dog will just eat his rotten ass. food for days

discord
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.gg/Bsyufq6

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Seppku is the only honorable way

Cum on your hermit crab while farting, record yourself, then send it to the police on facebook, then die in an epic standoff

My parent told me, whatever human can do, suicide is the worst thing possible. You were gifted life, so use it.
Giving up is last in the list, have you tried everything? Tell everyone who makes you miserable to fuck off. Sell everything, go travel, fuck, drug, fun, sun, ass, beer, hike, joke.
Go swim in the ocean with a hooker while on drugs and then fuck her in the ass. Rent a good car and go to the mountains with your dog.

What’s your dog gonna think if you kill yourself user? At least somebody loves you unconditionally. Please don’t kill yourself. Change your life in some way or at least leave it all behind.

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You speak the truth

Dubs confirm

dont kill yourself user, you have only one life, and your dog loves you. dont

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Get help.

Funny how EVERYONE assumes depression when mention of suicide comes up.
I have known im gonna off myself for years, depression is not what im suffering from.
Its simply a plan to avoid a long, slow painful and humilating slide into old age..
Who wants to have ass wiped by kids?
Who wants yo be abused by care staff?
Who wants to hand over all control of themselves to people only interested in dollarpounds?
Not fucking me, thats who..
The way out should be taken under my own steam not some otger fucker who doesnt know a thing about me.

Through what?

They gonna grieve eitherway, leave a message that it was your decision to go out of this life taken at your timings.

They will understand and grief will pass.

GET SOME PERSONAL RESPONISBILITY AND DIE OF OLD AGE

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