Girl of a year broke up with me. I'm only 23 and it literally only lasted a year but I can't deal with it. I've been in so many relationships in my life but this was the one, I can tell it was.
All my future plans were with her. Every single thing I think about I either don't want to do, or don't want to do without her. I'm lost. It was so sudden. We were all ok and she dumped it on me she hasn't been wanting this for the two weeks without any warning.
We could've talked it out if she just wanted to. I could change, but she doesn't want it, she doesn't want me. Right about now I sound like a fuckin bitch.
What the fuck do I do anons? How do I stop feeling this way? It's only been a few days and I can feel myself craving the opiates I had got clean from because of her help. It's going to drive me to suicide and I don't know what to do. Right now, I'm weak, and I can admit it. I really thought she was the one.
Sorry user it’s going to hurt and you’re going to feel sick every time you think about her. It’s going to last for years.
Aiden Walker
Find a good hobby distract yourself that way, fuck that girl. She didn't deserve you anyway user.
Jaxon Turner
Shit.. I wish I was 23 again with girl problems. Im 29 with recent health issues and hadnt been with a chick since 2011. You just take it a day at a time, take up something productive and you will meet another. It may get better for you. In my case, it got worse. My time is up and I'm going to off myself next month.
23 there will still be hope for you. Just keep on. Take it from me, you never know what the future brings. Maybe good or bad but at 23, lot of good can happen to you. You dont want to be me. Close to 30, still at home while my little sister moved, broke, in pain and discomfort, no friends no love. What little life I had, plans for the better, activities have been all shot down and I have been in doors for a year. Comes next month, I'm leaving.
Don't give up so soon dude, not for a chick. There are others dude. Just keep looking, you have a better shot than most of us. Have a safe and good day, bro.. Hope things end up in your favor..
Cameron Rivera
Forgot to mention, I have a bed bug problem and I now sleep in a room in bad shape, I sleep in the bottom bunk and its full of junk.. This is my life now.. Take care OP
Joshua Jones
That's what I'm afraid of. I don't want to feel this, not for any longer than I need to.
I've been trying, it's hard to enjoy anything but I'm hoping it'll get better.
You're right. Equal chances I end up like that though man. Hope things get better before you end it too.
Oliver Long
29 y/o user back.
When I was 23, my dreams fell right after finishing college due to burning out and high expectations, my ex moved on. Was broke and my dog I had since 12 had to be put down due to cancer and old age. 2013 was a bad year but I got up, didnt wanna mope anymore.
I revisited my old dreams to try to get to it all the while. Searching for a job. I had my health and decided to go hard. Well, met a chick 5 years ago but she wasnt into me but I kept going. Found a job and worked there for almost a year but got laid off. I wish it were a better story, one of triumph but my life literally got ruined last year due to health issues that came.
The only threads I had were cut. All I did was struggle I barely got to live. Im not going to preach but I did get up that time from something similar to your situation and you know, you have had more success at getting women than me.
We are different people. Our experiences are different. Now that I am in the shit hole even more, I miss 2013 because at least I had my health. OP, I'm just tired.. I have tried too hard.
If I can do one thing before I off myself, before I devistate those that care about me: Don't be like me, OP. Stay positive. Stay away from bad shit, don't let a chick dictate your life. Plenty others out there. And furthermore, don't come back here to Yea Forums or Yea Forums.
Caleb Torres
That definitely puts it into perspective. It can turn out bad but you're right, I can't give up, not this early anyway. Likely or not, I hope you meet someone worth staying around for until then stranger.
Aaron Rodriguez
Went through something similar, OP. I went to a therapist about it, and it helped a little, but what helps the most is time. You're 23. You have plenty of time to meet someone new that could be your forever.
Gabriel Hall
girls don't want bitches learn to adapt
Nicholas Morales
Hey user, usually don't post around here but since it's a topic close to my heart and you seem like you could use some words of support, I'll write something (and nice pic choice btw).
I'm almost 22 and had been with a girl for 4 years, we were together through a lot of ups and downs in each others lives that truly made me believe we would last through thick and thin. We got through high school and into our first college years together. Of course we had our issues during the relationship, but all the good things made those seem irrelevant to me at the time.
Eventually those at first small issues turned bigger and so much got accumulated (also from a lot of personal problems I wasn't dealing with the right way) and eventually she snaped, in a time where I thought things were going great, I should add.
One night she was staying with me and we talked about my problems, which were making me drink heavily. She said she would always be there for me. I believed her because at that moment she seemed really convincing. We hugged, kissed and had sex. Some weeks later she broke up with me.
Adam Garcia
You have a rough road ahead of you but I'd encourage you to block her from all social media and do not undo it you'll cyber stalk her if you felt that much about her and it will only rip you apart more. Time heals all wounds, the scars may remain but this CAN get better. Smoke some weed dude don't touch the poison again.
Michael Garcia
i know it's gonna hurt ,but you'll get over it ,trust me :) ,try not to think abt it ,idk go out ,play games, idk what your hobbies are ...
everything happens for a reason ,and i'm a hundred purcent that meet the 'one' :) ,until them stranger.
Charles Hernandez
Since you posted with new Polyphia I'll give you my best advice ever. Listen to more music dude, look up Hail The Sun, Vis, Sianvar, A Lot Like Birds, Dance Gavin Dance, Night Verses, Royal Coda, Stolas, Body Thief, Icarus The Owl, plus any other swancore bands out there, it'll def take your mind off of her plus blow your mind if you ever take psychedelics, which will also help you out if you think you're up for that route of healing
I got desloated, suicidal and just didn't see a light, all this added to my previously mentioned undealt issues. In the meantime she was posting pictures of herself living the life with her college friends, even flirting on the comments section, without a single care in the world. I asked myself how could that be the same person I had spent 4 years of my life with? She changed so suddenly. I lost a lot of weight, was having panic attacks in the middle of my college exams, I couldn't sleep. Even in dreams she was there. I was losing my mind thinking and rethinking about it. Rejection is a bitch.
After 2 months of that hell I was lying in bed, ready to end it all, everything seemed so pointless to me now, specially while knowing she just didn't care anymore. Eventually I just snapped and I knew I couldn't just wallow in the pain anymore. I had to turn it around somehow.
So I started changing small things and being patient with myself, I failed and questioned myself and self worth a lot of times, but I didn't want to stop, I had a goal and I had nothing to lose, my logic was: if I was going to end it all, why not try something I'd never have before?
Brayden Adams
This guy is right.
Jace Reed
agreed aat least op will be sad with good music
Sebastian Baker
Ain't that the fuckin truth. The more I care about it the less she's going to want me. Learn to adapt is right.
That's kinda how I feel man. Just so out of the blue it's like my life hit a halt. Your situation is so similar to mine. I keep having dreams of her texting me saying she wants to get back together. It's been four days and 100% of my diet's consisted of pain and sleeping pills. I hope I hit that point of just finding the strength to do something, anything soon.
Which I've been doing so blocking her may be a good idea. Especially after reading this guy's story.
I've been doing nothing but playing games and sleeping. I gotta do something else with my days haha.
Never have, was planning to take it for the first time with her. I'll give those a listen.
Definitely true, music's getting me through about as much as anything right now.
No, it's what I need to hear. I'd rather have been an idiot and been played and have her change as much on me as she did. It's almost like she's a completely different person. Hearing that helps move on so much.
Isaiah Murphy
pt.3 (continuing)
I started working out at first (so I could have some of my appetite and weight back), started seeing a lot of improvements to my image (even started recieving looks from other girls and compliments from guys, which was certainly helping my self esteem), started learning a martial art (something I've always wanted to try but was just "afraid" of), started meditating to deal with a lot of the thoughts of self worth and rejection and panic attacks I was having and just "reprogramming" my brain into new good habits. Spent a lot of time with good friends and also just doing things I've always loved, rediscovering old passions and hobbies I'd lost throughout the relationship. Also reconnected with some old friends, tried my hand at lending a hand at food charities too. Just wanted to be the best I could be and better than my previous self, while trying to make the world a less shittier place.
A lot of this stemed from wanting her to see the new me (especially the working out part), but eventually all the good and positive things I was gaining from all of this change just weighed more than some petty excuse for "revenge".
You should start with De-Loused in the Comatorium by The Mars Volta, and whenever you do take (either lsd or shrooms) watch them play live, I promise you it'll change your entire perspective on life youtu.be/DngK5rPI9QY
Oh no doubt. I've already lost quite a bit of weight from a week of not eating and the first thing I'm going to do when I get out of this mindset is exercise. Right now I want other women just to make her jealous, but I'm hoping by then I'd be doing it for myself anyway.
You know, this girl really was my life. I haven't even masturbated ever since she left. It's almost like I don't find other girls attractive. I really was hooked on her. Weirdly enough, seeing an ass that nice helps me realize all hope is not lost.
An hour worth of music, I'm two minutes in and I already like it. Thanks user.
And eventually with that newfound outlook on things, I came to terms with it and am just learning to accept it for what it was. Of course it still hurts from time to time, but I see it as a lesson and something to remind myself that sometimes people aren't who they seem to be and that happiness has to come from within, I had put all my eggs in the same basket that I just started almost depending on her.
What I want to say to you, OP, is to give yourself some time to process it all and to just let yourself feel the pain, the first months are the worst, but you have to pick yourself up afterwards and carry on. Just get it all out of your system during those first months. You'll probably feel really helpless and alone during these times, so spend that initial time doing things with friends if you can, it will help you to get out of your own head and to see things a bit differently and that you aren't as alone as you think you are.
At first you won't even have the will to do anything and won't even see the point in it. Everything will suck. Music stings, food doesn't even have a taste and every thought you have throughout the day is somehow connected to a memory of her. But if you start small and keep going, being patient with yourself, it all eventually falls into place as it snowballs into a positive thing.
You'll want to fall into old habits, and you'll try to justify to yourself the reasons why you should do opiates again, I know, because I also struggled to not fall into drinking again (meditation helped me a lot with this), just remember that you owe it to yourself to not do it, you're stronger than that OP.
Also I should add, if you really need to vent or talk shit about her and things you didn't like about the relationship, etc. talk to the 1 or 2 closest persons you have to yourself at most. As you recover your strength and distance yourself from all of this, you'll be glad you didn't go around talking to "everyone" about it.
I never thought I'd get to this place in my mind, or even heal from this, let alone help someone with all of my experience, but now I look back and while it was certainly a hell of a ride, I'm glad I got through it, I grew into a better version of me in every way possible.
Remember, OP, the power to make this whole situation a good or a bad one is all in your hands, it's not your fault it happened, but it's your damn responsibility how you deal with it, surround yourself with good people and work on yourself, be the best version you can be, good things will come out of your labour if you're willing to put in the time and effort. Can't stress this enough, be patient with yourself as change doesn't come easily nor quickly. Stay strong!
