Every day I realize more and more how little I really have in common with other people. I feel like a complete outcast...

Every day I realize more and more how little I really have in common with other people. I feel like a complete outcast. I unconditionally hate almost every person I meet, I don't know why and I can't really control it. I can't really relate to anyone. I've never really cared about another person in a meaningful way. I don't think I've had a single interesting life experience that I would like to share with others. I've never been able to hold a conversation, and I have no clue what the fuck normal people talk about. I used to have some hobbies but by now I've lost interest in all of them. Nothing makes me laugh and nothing makes me cry, I don't remember the last time I've genuinely done either. I really don't remember the last time I've felt anything. I used to have friends in high school but I haven't kept in touch with any of them and I haven't made any new friends since then. The only romantic relationship I've ever had lasted for a whole 4 days. I've been addicted to.porn since fucking elementary school (no I am not joking). And it probably doesn't help that I've spent the past three years poisoning my brain here.
As much as I want to blame how I feel on the toxic environment I grew up in and the incompetence of my parents, I can't really will myself to believe that those are the only things that make me the loser that I am today.

I feel like other people just have something that I don't, something that is just beyond my comprehension.

I've been trying to fap more in moderation recently but I want to kill myself right now so I'll go watch Asian porn until I feel better.

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tl;dr

underage b&

are you m3

I literally said I'm a college student
>we're even both named anonymous
Holy shit we must be the same person

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Humans aren't as different as you think. We all basically want the same things, and like the same things.

UH OH LOOK OUT ANONS WE GOT A MISANTHROPIC SCHIZO OUT HERE

No I feel the same I fucking hate everyone and really think we as a society need a reset of some kind. People are so dumb and full of themselves. I feel like an outcast because aswell, like nobody wants me around. Planning to peace out in about 2 years. The loneliness has gotten so bad, nothing upsets me more then seeing my family reject me and my classmates, past friends etc, all talking without me and not looking at me once. I don't feel like I belong anywhere in this world.

I want nothing and I like nothing, which in turn makes me nobody.

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This is some self indulgent, narcissistic shit.
You aren't unique, or special.
You're in college, so you're too young to know anything about anyone else, or the world, or how people are internally.
I'm sorry, but you're diatribe is just another way of saying "I'm special".

Other people have shit to do, that's what they have that you don't. They have goals and peruse them, and along the way bond with people who are similarly inclined.
You don't have anyone because you are just wandering through life with no aim.
You're putting the cart before the horse. It isn't Social life - Romance - Work, it's work - Social life - Romance.

Focus on bettering yourself, mentally, physically, and financially, THEN think about social shit. By then you won't need to be thinking about it, because you'll have accumulated people along the way.
Real people like people with purpose and competence, and are generally repulsed by those who have neither.

>is obviously a narcisist
>woa is me im so unique
>everyone else is full of themselves

You're literally a cliche

yeah and im 200 years old

/thread

count the amount of times you wrote "I" in that statement, while also speaking about "people are so ... full of themselves"

hypocrisy is a neat :)

So what do you fucking want from me user?
Cogito fucking ergo sum bitch, if you do think and feel, even sadness, that means you are someone and a fully capable of turning his fate around.
Motivation comes from around you, not that much from your inside, so you better find the way to do the peace with your parents or you will perish from the disgust of having to see them every day.
Also, have you tried a therapist, gym, hooker, extracurricular activities? Something?

if you don't mind me asking, how old are you? are you a neet? how many relationships are you holding right now (family/friends)?

he said since high school which means he's out, you turn 18 before you leave

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> you turn 18 before you leave

not if you graduate early
also, he's still way too old to be talking about "me me me me me me OMG EVERYONE IS SO FULL OF THEMSELVES by the way me me me me me I I I I I I I I I I I i i i i i I I i i i iI I I i i i i me me me me me me OMG EVERY IS SO FUCKING NARCISSISTIC but me me me mem em e i i i I I I i i i m mem"

he needs to realize how sheltered he is and then he needs to kill himself for thinking like a teen girl

alternatively, he can take hormone replacement shit and become a femanon

this world needs more sissies

What a shame. I'm so sorry this is your life. You could seek help.

the future of the human race is made up of men and sex slaves (of varying flavors)

>I unconditionally hate almost every person I meet
You dont unconditionally hate anyone but yourself. Because you are a loser faggot. Stop being so proud of your loser thoughts and you'll be fine. EVERYONE is better than you because YOU suck. When you realize that you will be better for it.

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19 in less than a month. Nobody that i really consider a friend anymore. There's this one girl I occasionally talk to on snap but that's it. On very rare occasions I might play video games with people I used to know in high school but that's it.
I've tried gym and extracurricular activities. I like the endorphin rush from the gym but that's about it. I had to drop most of my extracurricular activities because I don't have time because I need to focus on schoolwork. But when I tried going to events and clubs and whatnot I still couldn't connect with anyone.
Schoolwork has always been my foremost priority and nothing I said has contradicted that. I don't think I'm unique and special I think I'm pathetic. I've been steadily working towards self improvement for several months now and it hasn't yielded me even the tiniest shred of happiness or feeling of humanity.
>Real people like people with purpose and competence, and are generally repulsed by those who have neither.
Yes, and because of this I find myself repulsive, hence why I'm here in the first place
I don't understand this retarded narrative that I'm self centered. I came here to vent about how I hate the person I've become so of course I'm going to talk about myself. When in OP did I say anything about people being full of themselves. Also I don't even consider myself to narcissistic.
>You dont unconditionally hate anyone but yourself.
Well I do hate myself but every time I try to be friends with someone my brain just finds a reason to hate them no matter how small
>Because you are a loser faggot.
Yes that is why I'm here venting on Yea Forums
>Stop being so proud of your loser thoughts and you'll be fine.
Who said I was proud?
>EVERYONE is better than you because YOU suck.
Again, I am aware of this, it's why I'm here making a thread about how much I hate myself
>When you realize that you will be better for it.
If only it were that easy.

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>I've been steadily working towards self improvement for several months now and it hasn't yielded me even the tiniest shred of happiness or feeling of humanity.
Because "several months" is nothing. You dont notice any real progress at that age until the year mark. And that's only if you committed to change. Just stop being a whiny faggot and drop the attitude and try to see things from other people's perspective you meet. What you hear will be retarded, but guess what, you just dont realize the things YOU think are retarded because you're a dumb faggot loser.

ok i forfeit, mocked the wrong person

but if you're 19, just give it like 3-4 years and find some truth to life

for me it helped to lose my job due to recklessness, blow all my money and realize who i rely on, then crush myself with guilt and finally look at everything abstractly

i.e. looking at my family not as individual members with a history and such, but as a unit where each member has certain characteristics (supportive, needy, etc.)

then looking at what NEEDS to be done vs. what can be done
i.e. dishes, laundry, cooking, etc.

while looking for all abstraction, I found stoicism and specifically 2 books: Meditations (Aurelius) and On The Shortness of Life (Seneca)

by these, look at your past then to your present and realize how fleeting time is
youtube.com/watch?v=d5E2AQKuCyU
youtube.com/watch?v=ABRN0E_mI0U
reflect on how you've changed physically and mentally within your span of life time
and (not required) set a time limit on your life. For me, 50 years is how long I plan to live (currently 22)
children/relationships, I'll look to that when I'm 25. For now, I'm focusing on perfecting myself as much as possible (and not by others' standards, but by what direction I want my personality/life to go)

and since I was 11, I swore to do what I've always done: disregard others' feelings, disregard relationships.
If they come/if people stay in my life, so be it. If no one is there, so be it.
(it helped not needing anyone for schoolwork and only needing my parents to provide sustenance and shelter)

what do you need and what can you improve within your daily life

there's more I can say, but I feel like this is enough, as it's the core of what got me going

forgot to mention: just listening to Meditations while sleeping and just in the background helped me
also, being forced to give up smoking weed (god bless the justice system, jk still fuck it)

what you're going through, that lack of connection/feeling for others, it's fine
doesn't matter

think practically and abstractly
observe others and learn how to interact with them
feeling is unnecessary, and you should be thankful not to feel
feeling influences action, and without feeling you act by your willpower and decisions alone

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This guy is a MAJOR fag OP. Dont listen to him except for the "dishes, laundry, cooking, etc." part.

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your mom's a fag, but you got a point

and you can't deny he should focus on practicality and thinking abstractly alongside improving on his weak points (if it's social interaction, then observe and imitate)

and if you think he shouldn't be practical and he shouldn't think abstractly, then you should kys for being a disgusting faggot

Heyy...nice Elon...

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i think about killing myself at least once per day.