This is incomplete, but:

Gal Gadot is twice the woman Brie Larson is.

this

Better looking check
Better actress check
More class check

Facts check out.

You’re a fucking retard aren’t you???

>Hahah wow dude toxic femininity is not a thing, you must be really hateful of women.

ZA WARUDO

>Hahah wow chick toxic masculinity is not a thing, you must be really hateful of men.

>Gal Gadot
I would lick her asshole.

you sat there with a fucking stopwatch and notepad so you could complain about how a movie was mean to you? how sad is your fucking life?

poo in the loo, back to english dicksucking

Notice their pattern, they use a lot of DUDE

You're retarded if you hate this movie because it's vaguely feminist. Having a few jokes and themes fall flat isn't the end of the world. It's not a mind-blowingly good movie, but it was fine.
But you're ALSO RETARDED if you're a feminist and think this is a powerful woke feminist movie because it's the most lukewarm stereotypical '90s portrayal of feminism they could possibly have gone with.
>Girl power is dated and ableist
>The evil man pilot is the most caricatured portrayal of what sexual harassment looks like I've seen in film this decade
>She has a fucking black sidekick in 2019, major loss of intersectionality points there
>She's a member and supporter of the imperialist colonialist transphobic homophobic islamophobic racist fascist United States military, even more intersectionality points down the drain
This is a comfortably dated vaguely feminist movie aimed at housewives who want to still call themselves feminists and 20-30 something performative allies who don't really get feminism but were told by their gender studies major friends it's important so they go out to see it.

7/10, I liked the cat

I watched it online, you fucking retard, lol.

That's not what a Mary Sue is you fucking 11 year old retard.

Stop bein a picky cunt and just enjoy the movie user

The movie is unenjoyable, you fucking dingus

I made this post for dudes who got called misogynists for disliking the film

Dude who cares. You're such a little bitch lol

Thanks for warning me, I was going to go see it. Now I’ll just look it up because all I cared about was the endgame shit

good post

Well that's probably because you're an incel dweeb. I have a daughter, this was hr first Marvel film, she loved it, lots of positive modelling for her. I want my kid growing up strong with a fuck off attitude, not having to live in a world with shithead women haters like you.

I've seen all the Marvels, Agents of Shield, read the comics from the 1970's, and there's nothing wrong with this movie, enjoyed it. You're just an asshole.

Wow, obvious samefag is obvious. You didn't even try, OP.

Im gonna watch it. After downloading. Mcu wont make any money if off me haha

Damn dude you are going to blow a hole in Hollywood's billions turnover. You are the death of the film industry, yada yada. I've pirated the shit out of the internet for the last ten years and Hollywood is still doing fine.

I actually saw this at the cinema with my kid though, first time I've been out in years. It's OK, enjoyable enough. You certainly won't regret seeing it if you've torrented it.

Missing Kickass here.

>incel dweed
Hey, nice originality.

>wants to raise daughter to be a man hater
How retarded are you exactly?

Obvious shill is obvious, gtfo X)

actually, no X)

this is me

this is Not me; thanks for the appreciation, peeps :3

you're missing the fact that the only white man, is the bad guy (jude law). The good men are black, and alien (green). Then Lawson woman savior of poor helpless refugees, Danvers is a "so awesome" chick from the 90's who apparently wasn't even interested in men because none ever come about in her memories, her bff is a minority woman as well, her admirer is a minority girl.....

Its so formulaic and obvious its embarrassing. They should have at least tried to cover up some of the blatant tropes of the movie.

Wow you really are a retard. No, I want to raise my daughter to recognise, avoid, or ultimately be able to kick the shit out of men like you. She's doing pretty well, could probably take you out already, you spineless piece of shit.

Well coulson but he was barely in it
And having the black women and aliens of color looking up to their literal glowing white savior is downright racist by 2019 standards

>The good men are black, and alien (green).

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I always thought it was Gary Stu not Marty Stu

You're sensational. Really. :)

Almost as much as you're retarded for assuming anti-misandry = misogyny. X) smfh

both are accepted

not if she is a woman

Yes yes yes, how many times must you spam this pasta?

Or seeing misandry where it doesn't exist =/= misogyny? Check yourself dude, I've no time for rabid men haters but there was nothing wrong with how this movie was pitched.

Anyway, I thought all this shilling finished soon after the movie was released? Does the studio need a bit more interest as it comes to the end of its run?

Gal Gadot sucks

I bought tickets to see it because of this

wow, using " X) " unironically
did i fall through a wormhole and is this fucking myspace cca 2002 or is the op just a 14 year old faggot

cute samefag is cute; this is only the second posting LOL

Try again. :)

It's a Marvel film, it's over-engineered pap for the masses. None of them are cinematic greats, they'll do whatever ticks the boxes to get people in the cinema, and they've had a fuckton of practice at fine-tuning the formula.

Each film has a special tuning to a certain audience, this one is feminists. The idea is to hook demographics in one by one. This one is not aimed at you.

It's blatant pandering and fan service, but that's what ALL Marvel films are. Stop being a whiny bitch because this particular one didn't pander specifically to your greasy swamp ass.

And yet your impotent nerdrage only has the effect of amplifying interest in the film. "This film is so woke it made the incels are mad" drives sales too.

Not only did you pay to see it, you're doing the Marvel PR teams job for them. You got played. Or you work for Marvel, wouldn't surprise me in the least if they are driving this shit on purpose.

So misandrists are a worthy demographic to pander to. Very nice. :)

I made this post for dudes who got called misogynists for disliking the film so they could articulate their defenses, and I watched it online.

putlocker9.ru/film/captain-marvel-2019-1080p.29677/watching.html

Do you think Marvel give the tiniest iota of a fuck who they need to pander to if they can get sales?

Even the Hydra stuff is finely tuned to not turn off literal Nazis so they can get their cash.

And what would "articulating a defense" on fucking Yea Forums achieve? You wanted to have a moan about your feels, and get some validation, don't pretend otherwise.

Expecting moral or cinematic greatness from a multi billion franchise is just begging to be disappointed.

>Stop being a whiny bitch because this particular one didn't pander specifically to your greasy swamp ass.

>So misandrists are a worthy demographic to pander to. Very nice. :)

>Do you think Marvel give the tiniest iota of a fuck who they need to pander to if they can get sales?

I know they don't, dumbass. You missed my point completely X) smh

> X) smh
Begone, back to Facebook with you.

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easy way to not get offended by what you label as feminist and misandry. Don't watch the fucking movie. There's movies geared for all types of people, why shouldn't feminists get their own? You sound like a whiny white boi incel from Yea Forums, o wait.

Oh wow, you're so wise. Except you're a fucking dumbass. X)

I actually had two feminists (one male, one female) stop being friends with me over a Facebook post that read:

ITV A female intellectual waxes lyrical critiquing Captain Marvel

tl;dw Captain Marvel is to MCU as The Principal and the Pauper is to The Simpsons

youtube.com/watch?v=cuvuwe3YxgA

It's like watching Saw if you don't like blood. Whining about it afterwards just makes you look like a spaz.

>be 28
>going to a restaurant
>ordering a pizza pie
>i said no ansjovis wtf
>girl says sorry i say is ok
>eat pizza pie while lying
>go outside wait till restaurant closes
>walk up to girl call her a bitch
>yelling I SAID NO ANSJOVIS CUNT
>punch her repeatedly in the left eye
>shit stars bleeding she yells "whyyyy whyyyyy"
>take her head and place it above my cock
>let blood pour on cock
>shove it in her mouth NOW SUCK IT
>manager comes out yells WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING
>grab my pistol and blast him twice
>then blast girl in skull with my cock inside her mouth
>let blood pour all over my cock
>feels good man
>escape and go home
>masturbate with her blood still on my cock

Sure, have a feminist movie. Even have misandry in it if you want to. But don't inject the shit into established franchises, changing important details about said victimized franchise *cough*Ghostbusters*cough*

p.s. Xena: Warrior Princess, the Kill Bill series, Wonder Woman, Alita: Battle Angel.. All of those are good.

btw, I made that FB post with next to no investment in this whatsoever; I'm not entirely sure I'd ever even watch an MCU flick

> A female intellectual waxes lyrical critiquing...
Cringe. On every word there.
> The Simpsons
Are you actually the comic book guy?

Stop being butthurt over people on Facebook (lol) being butthurt by you posting a video of people being butthurt. That's all this is, and it's just a bit sad.

Great! Now do literally every comic that was drawn from the 40s until the 00s and the sexism that existed and every other superhero movie where no matter how capable a woman is (Gamora) she still needs a man to save her (Starlord)

You're obviously a shill to ignore the fact that people I know IRL labeled me a misogynist and stopped being my friend because I made that post in passing

Try. Harder. :)

It’s their (marvel and Disney) franchise they can do what they want. Why do you faggot incels think that because you like something you get a say in what happens with it? If you don’t like the direction it’s going don’t watch it. I was a big Star Wars fan and now I refuse to watch them because they are terrible. My life goes on. I don’t feel betrayed because this thing that I loved is now ruined(can’t even get the original cuts of the original trilogy anymore). I just go on with my life and try and find something else to enjoy.

You don't own the franchise. You are a consumer pleb, and if they calculate they stand to make more money selling out to feminists/black people/nazis/communists/cat owners/autofellators/whatever, they'll do it in a heartbeat.

Don't like it? Tough shit, that's how capitalism works and Marvel are fucking good at it. They make more money that ever before almost every single fucking time, and by excluding salty neckbeards, they make even more, as everyone else feels more included, even while the incel tears drive clicks and sales by implication ("if the incels hate it, it must be good").

If one person calls you an asshole THEY are having a bad day

If two people call you an asshole YOU are having a bad day

If three people call you an asshole you are probably an asshole

Beat you to it but yea

I wouldn't say it is as bad as the Last Jedi, but it is pretty bad.

The worst part is how boring it is. So the last third of the movie, she gets her full power and the big last battle sequences start. At that point I found myself actively wishing the movie would end. I was that bored with it.

The first few minutes of the movie were pretty good I thought. I'd would like to see a movie about her Kree SF team running around doing scifi special ops shit. That looked cool.

Rest of the movie was as bad, or worse, than OP describes.

I hope you have learned that "Facebook friend" means literally nothing. Stop complaining on Yea Forums because someone, ZOMG, unfriended you. What, are you 12?

>be samefag
>continue to ignore the point I was making

Of course they can do what they want with their franchise, retard. :) To quote Carol's first word in the Captain Marvel 2012 run:

Duh.

What i wanna know is how she got the pants off that fuckin mannequin since it was still on its stand. I don't care if she can lift the planet with her clit. Those things are a bitch to dress and undress if you don't have a table set up.

They stopped being my friend IRL over the passing anti-Captain Marvel movie post, you Stupid. Fucking. Twit. :)

Clit pushups you say.
I feel like there should be porn of this.

lol good point X)

Good friends you have there.
Have you considered that you're a toxic incel and they were never your friend?

>t. Seething feminist cunt

I Thought they were friends, and I was unpleasantly surprised.

-yawn- As for being a toxic incel...

No u

you watched a comic book movie
it was garbage
hopefully youve learned something today

$5 says your Facebook feed is full of fedora tipping, cringe, nice guy salt and "intellectual" posts "critiquing" popular culture.

You know he hasn't and he'll be slurping down Infinity War 2: Literally Everyone Fighting For Like An Hour Without A Plot like a starving hooker in a bukkake shoot.

16416 Dodson Branch Hwy.
Cookeville, TN 38501

Waiting on my $5, sweetheart... :)

Not the same fag since two people can disagree with you. Your point is that you are bitching that they inserted something you don’t like into their own IP. So what?

I was I impressed it didn’t have a lot of feminism in it. You fucked up in the head bro. Fucking incel obviously.

Oh you are going to get so much gay porn delivered to you

What, are you fucking Illiterate? I already said I had next to no investment in this when I made the Facebook post, and that I'd never even seen an MCU movie. Retard. X)

You had no investment in it yet made a FB post that was cringeworthy enough for people to stop being your friend? Sad

Awfully salty for someone without investment.

Still missing the point. What a 'tard. No more time for you :)

you realize you sound like a complete retard and you are just as triggered about irrelevant shit as the feminists you criticize?

Delbert Young, huh...

I'm gonna go out on a limb and say you're not 89.

So what’s the point? Enlighten me

this

Send Delbert $5. He is probably a war hero

Yeah, sorry, if you live here, I'm gonna have to add "has a nazi flag, an AR15 with more than 3 "tactical" attachments and weigh >300lb" to my bet.

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Nothing left in the pond but baited hooks now. Think I'll take my leave :)

G'day, r'tards :v

No can do. He died in 2014.

Everyone, can we have a moment of silence for our resident white knight neckbeard? He passed away 5 years ago.

That’s all there ever was. This thread was one giant baited hook

No shit.

My bad, typo; 16461

Wait he died and no one moved into that house for 5 years? Must be a shithole

So why point out that’s all that’s left implying there was ever anything else?

looking forward for next year oscars

bwasnevergood.jpg

Did you know Delbert?

God i hope it wins a load of Oscars. Just for the hilarious nerdrage.

you'll be sorely disappointed, chump

HIs widow (Lula Mae) still lives there. She's 91.

I mean, unless she's the one on here. But i'm gonna go out on a limb and say it's not her.

I mean, I don't give the tiniest fuck about the Oscars unless something lulzy happens.

No, you got it right. It's 38501. 38501-9554 to be precise.

funny because the movie was actually really good if you don't have down syndrome

Why are you an academy member?

Black Panther won some shit, this one will as well

The 38501 part was right; the 16416 part was wrong; it was 16461

Hey I have Down syndrome and I liked it

One of the Kree also calls Earth a "shithole", and they also do an immigrant/islam parallel with the Skrulls which comes across as subtle as a brick to the face.

Kree call them "terrorists" but then they pull the "oh no they're actually peaceful refugees, the Kree are actually the bad guys who've always been instigating and oppressing us"

The oscars don’t mean shit. The good movies never win

but Black Panther was actually good

So?

oh wait you meant the street address.

So it's the Haney's and the Hootins. What a hillbilly name for a hillbilly town. But you're quite progressive and feminist for a guy who fucks his sister.

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Subjectively

>Sr.
>Jr.
>All of them
>Tennessee

fucking kek

>No u
What are you OP, 10?

short answer: no

movie was brainless fun like avengers 2, there were a couple of cringy moments but sam motherfucking jackson makes it worth it

>joe teddy

Having two nicknames as your name is white trash as hell

better than Captain Marvel

What are you user, a newfag?

Tellem Steve Dave

So are you Joe Teddy or Ronda Lynn?

Or Jasper Joe Bob or Toothless Cletus

Subjective as well. I thought both were ok. Nothing to get all worked up over

Obviously

I don’t even care if his legal name is Joseph Theodore, whether he chooses to call him self Joe Teddy or not is white trash as fuck

How the fuck is he getting internet? A bunch of raccoon and possums running to and from the ISP with notes taped to them?

"Aw dangit one of the coons dun gots themselves run over by a pickup truck. I hate packet loss."

Maybe when I go to see a movie about super heroes, i'd like to enjoy and be immersed in the fictional world the film is creating. When the movie feels the need to pull me out of that immersion and beat me over the head with thinly veiled stances on modern political topics, it ends up feeling like a worse movie because of it.

real best of youtube.com/watch?v=qkuqNH8txUk

Ok so don’t see Marvel movies anymore. Simple. Plenty of movies are not to my liking. If you didn’t know that Captain Marvel was going to be what it was that’s on you though.

LOL are you faggots having fun burning my effigy? X)

>or is the op just a 14 year old faggot
>What, are you 12
>What are you OP, 10?

Estimates of OP's age dropping post by post.

Is that supposed to be a metaphor? Because if so it’s poorly executed

blew my whole theory fuck

That's not very woke of you. She's not THERE to make 40 year old white dudes feel better. She's there to raise awareness and give girls a brave, powerful message: They can be cosmic superheroes that are retroactively stronger than every other character in your universe because it's currently a hot-button political issue and a nearly trillion dollar media conglomerate genuinely cares and "wants to start a conversation", as every company seems to. Lots of conversations being had. But buy their product first.

Grow a few brain cells. It'll come to you.

tfw you're laughing so hard you're sweating X)

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Is your effigy a fat cross eyed inbred retard in a rascal scooter shopping bulk at costco for gallons of Mountain Dew Code Red and a 2 ton crate of funyuns?

disney bought tickets to inflate sales numbers. multiple accounts of empty theatres around america, China bashing the shit out of it and massive negative reviews

My effigy is whatever you make of it... X)

tits or gtfo

Well, generally it tends to resemble the target.

Hahah wow chick toxic masculinity is not a thing, you must be really hateful of men.

>"You Do know why they call it a Cockpit.. Don't you? -smirk-"

It wasn't a sexual reference. It was referring to the fact that women aren't allowed to fly in combat, hence "cock"pit. You need a penis to fly. Derp

>She's so pompous and sassy, though. X) She's an ill-mannered Mary Sue; She's Totally a spoiled brat. X)

A Mary Sue is a character that conveniently has all of the tools needed to resolve the plots issues with no effort made. Carol Danvers isn't that. She is an educated, military trained pilot who got empowered (somehow) by the Space Stone. Now Rey, from The Force Awakens, on the other hand, is a Mary Sue. She finds out she has Force powers and beats Kylo, a highly trained force user, all within a few hours.

>A heaping wad of toxic femininity, loaded with misandry and misandrist triggers

I honestly feel bad for a person who cannot enjoy a comic book movie because they are so deluded in their own insecurities. Sure, it had a message to women that when a man tells you that you can't do something because you're a woman, you get back up and prove them wrong. That's a fine message, unless you are so insecure about masculinity that it triggers your fragile ego.

Dr. Strange literally had a more ridiculous "Marty Stu" situation. You're telling me a neurosurgeon, who is the bestest in the world, then proceeds to go to a temple and become the bestest wizard in the world, even though his training was about as a long as Rocky's workout montage? That's just silly.

You're picking apart specifics in a movie universe with a talking space raccoon, stones that control aspects of the universe, and AI that miraculously lives in 1940s computers. That's just some silly bitch bullshit.

Like when I gave you an address that was implied to be mine. Wow, Fucking stupid :)

tits or GTFO

>Maybe when I go to see a movie about super heroes, i'd like to enjoy and be immersed in the fictional world the film is creating. When the movie feels the need to pull me out of that immersion and beat me over the head with thinly veiled stances on modern political topics, it ends up feeling like a worse movie because of it.

Just want to say that there was a comic that introduced general fury as black, and the author of said comic admitted to modelling it on Samuel. So it is actually kinda cool that they got Samuel to portray a version of a character modeled off of himself. I would say which comic it was, but I don't know, you can always just Google it though.

someone wasted their life on a liberal arts degree

no kidding

I've noticed that anyone making a 7/10 review is arguing lefty talking points as well. All other reviews are Much lower.

Yeah. Just like real life when there is actual physical conflict.

You've got a point, for the vast majority of cases

Probably a fair point. I'd say it scraped a 7 but that is as you say because my kid was all over it. That aside, 6.8 maybe. I'd still recommend it, it's not bad by any means.

I was just listing the names of the people registered to the address you gave. You're the one who said it was yours.

>ties in with the franchise's #1 series: The Avengers
there are rumors that Disney pre-buys tickets to boost sales, I think it was something around 40 of the bought tickets where the "costumer" never showed up

Wow, dude. You're continuing to make yourself look dumb, but okay.

>used Substitute.
>was super effective.

I hate how people who typically rip into games and movies if they're bad, never say anything negative about movies or games with in your face political agendas and pussyfoot around the fact that the media in question is objectively bad because they don't wanna seem like "misogynists" or something

Me too, that's why I didn't X)

Whatever you say Cletus.

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You took the time to look "me" up X)

Ya'll sure are baitable! [crying laughing emoji][crying laughing emoji]

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