Alright.. it's time to listen up, Faggots.
Me? I'm the Equalizer. Some of you are going to hate what I'm here to tell you, but in the end, you'll thank me.
Ever had your fancy car deliberately scratched with a key? Or sugar poured in the gas tank? Or something else done deliberately to it, so as to partially destroy your overpriced vehicle in some way? It was probably me. And the reason? FUCK YOU. You don't NEED it.
Now some of you assholes are probably sitting there thinking, "why would some jerk de-value my ultra-expensive car that I worked very long and hard, for?" See the above reason, dickhead. You only need a REGULAR car. Oh, and two other reasons. One, I'm levelling the playing-field. Do you NEED something with fancy gadgets and unnecessary comfort, while you drive around being a poncy, pantomime, pillow-biting prick and a cunt on the road?
No
Do you NEED something that travels so far and beyond just about every speed limit in the world, unnecessarily endangering the lives of pedestrians young and old, tall and short?
NO
I'M the guy that brings everyone back to their senses.
I'M the guy who pours paint-stripper down that little gap where the hood meets the windows, and fucks your engine big-time.
I'M the guy who uses pre-planned routes to slip in and out of wealthy areas like a fucking ghost, using soft shoes, gloves and other items of clothing that will never be traced back to me, finding expensive vehicles that patrons park on the side of the road at night instead of in a garage.
I'M the guy who gets away with it. Every. TIME. Deal with it, bitchmade.
I'm the guy who makes you think TWICE before purchasing stupid shit you don't NEED.
Downgrade your stupid death machine to something that gets you around, Retards
