Has anyone ever had hemorrhoids? What was it like?

Has anyone ever had hemorrhoids? What was it like?

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Like a pain in the ass

>have giant hemorrhoids
>can't push all my stinky doo doo out my ass
>have to roll up a ball of my extra soft 4-ply toilet paper and pour some water over it so it slides up my asshole and i can swab around in there for shit

feels like being married

Try to push it up inside, avoid spicy food and acids, apply cold damped toilet paper/towels, get medical attention soon or it will get worse and will require to be surgically removed

put some rubber bands on it

I have hemmorrhoids
Only bad when they flare up, usually due to m3 not eating well or being exhausted or eating something way too spicy
Itchy/burny anus plus when you poop the toilet paper feels like sand paper and you it feels like you can never get all of the shit wiped. By the time you do, there's all these bright spots of blood on the toilet paper

when they don't flare up its all gucci

God fucking damnit i deal with these fuckers every fucking day i hate them im always shoving supositories in my asshole to helo the pain....for me its a combo of eating lots if spicy food which i do everyday and also forcing my shits while neing constopating. Also i have a really dirty asshole so i wipe a million times and that makes it worse because i bleed and it feels like sand paper cutting my dirty asshole up fuck this shit i hate it i need to see a doctor but i domt wanna spread my cheeks for some rando who hasnt even taken me out ya know what il saying baby

>Gays can't go to space in fear of destroying Uranus

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I've had small ones that didn't hurt at all and would only occasionally itch a bit.

Pretty benign overall, in my experience.

They are forever

You tell me

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Alec?

Yeah, mine never made it to my external anus. They were just inside and felt like little hard bumps.

Just drink Metamucil its a orange fiber powder taste great and makes your poo silp out saved my life use to take 45mins dump now i sit on the toilet and donr in 2 mins and wont make you poop unless you have to best thing ever plz bois it will save you from getting any kind of rectal cancer no more pushing or heaving

good job you stupid faggot, thats the joke.

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got one once from forcing a greasy shit, you have to wipe a lot and it hurts a little to wipe and shit. you'll think it's all gone then you go and take a shit again and BAM it's back again with a vengeance. sooner or later it will go away though in my experience.

internal hemmorhoids cause your bowels to feel "full" like you aren't fully shitting everything out, and will bleed. External hemmorhoids look like small flaps of skin that hang off your asshole and also bleed. I think I had internal hemmorhoids at one point because of all the abdominal pressure I had to deal with during my job. Used some prep H and they eventually went away. Comes back occasionally but it's mild so whatever.

Would get a small one on the very rare occasion. Just once every several years. They were nothing to fret over since it just felt like a bump. One day I got a pretty bad one and it was not fun at all. Just try to avoid them at all costs.

NDT is not a part of that system. He's actively destroying science for political reasons.

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lmao

Having mine removed next month

fuck this stupid world

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i've only had them maybe 3 times in my life, they generally only seem to show up when i'm in a really stressful time of my life, when i'm eating a shit diet and so on.
first time was when I was 21 or 22 years old doing my prac teaching to get my teaching license. Shit was painful, uncomfortable and awkward when trying to lessons and observations at a highschool. Thats when they were the worst, like fleshy lumps hanging out of your butthole that you can feel pulsate with pain every time your heart pumps the blood through your body. Kind of interesting the 1/4 second lag between when your heart beats and then you feel fire in your butthole. Shitting was impossible, wiping clean even more impossible.
I didnt use any medication and no internet back then to look up advice. Being a typical early 20's male going to the doctor for what I assumed was deadly Ass Cancer was embarassing and out of the question.
I just stayed hydrated, stuck to liquid food like soups jelly pudding etc for a bit to make my shits easier and they eventually went away after a couple of weeks.

The couple of times I've had them since they were nowhere near as bad. Just burning/itchy, uncomfortable and hard to keep the butt clean.

If your toilet has a bidet or a bum-washer it's a godsend. If you get hemorrhoids regularly definitely drop a few $100 and import a toilet seat from Japan.