Can't fuckign sleep

Can't fuckign sleep.

Awesome DM here, ask me anything.

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why does my brother in law keep saying he will start a game i can join and learn for the first time then doesn't?

Because preparing a game can be really difficult and time-consuming. DM's usually love to DM, and have general ideas about what to DM, but they end up not doing so because getting the details together + adminisstrating the sessions is hard work and time consuming.

what makes you an awesome DM?

what makes you different from a regular DM that thinks he's awesome?

Why is D&D only fun with attractive girls in the group?

Several things. Mostly the fact that When I DM people haves a great time and everyone tries to get into my games, even when they have other games available wich they ignore. I have 8 people waiting at the momment to have a spot at my table.

This is false, at least, if you play 3.5

To go around this, I made a "Giant" group of players who can play games of 1-2 sessions, mini adventures, to call them something that I DM like once every two months.

They are part of this Resistance agains an evil empire and they are all low-levels. Every time the heroes of my main game end up in prison, enslaved or missing. (If they don't end up TPK) They are sent to rescue them since they are really important and this characters are really spendable to the resistance. So the ones available come to the sessions and play games in wich a lot of characters die, But those who do a good job and play interesting character may end up in the proper game when one of the main characters die.

No more questions? I guess I'll try to sleep then.

NO

where are you from?

Spain

trips confirm drummers get laid

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Ok, heading to the bed. Good night Yea Forums!

if grandma's packin' heat, I'mma pop a bitch

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1. how do you keep old players from other more tactical game systems from playing their character against the DM because they suspect everything is some kind of trap and not a carefully crafted plot point.

2. how do you get new, shy, "well I can't think of anything" players to participate when it's game on?

Anal

What do I do if all my players are boring as fuck.

1- Making them get themselves in trouble for that kind of paranoid/exceptic attitude. Make their own actions precipitate their demise.

2- Make them create a backstory and then use said backstory to compell them to do stuff or get involved. Give them alone scenes so they get comfy about playing.
Look for new players.

not OP, but I'd say:
find new players

--but easier said than done if you don't really have any friends, or don't have many that are into tabletop gaming.

I'd say, if they really do want to play, but they just suck at your campaigns, ditch the campaign, and build a new one tailored around their interest. modify the world if you have to. get them nice and comphy, and once the dice are really rolling, you've got them right where you want them, hopefully they'll fight for their characters with anything you throw at them, then on.

Kill them and take their stuff

what do you do if your players constantly make the NPCs carry the scene and talk to each other?

like seriously.. half the time I'm inventing dialog between two of my own characters. like "will you fuckers play the fucking game? I'm not Robin fucking Williams over here doing voices to entertain you all."

Do not introduce them to several npcs at once.

is it a cheap move to have an event happen in front of the player characters, and when they try to interact, ad a DM you say "your controls are locked.."

like it's a cut-scene.

It is, from my point of view.

I usually let them do whatever they want, but sometimes they can be to far way or it can be impossible for them to react in time, and this is ok too. Like, for example, if an assasin makes an attack to another npc, that takes one round, he can make such attack and then run, and then, only then, they can act.