Yea Forums how did you lose your virginity? *I want to see the most fucked up/funny stories you got

ouch, this one hurt me

i tried taking this one girls virginity and i couldnt break her hymen, long story short blood was everywhere and she was crying begging me to get her a maxipad

was it when Wall-E was splurging all over eve in space? If so,kek.

this is actually legendary, i need to try fucking to a pixar movie now

If it were me I would try fucking to Bambi and see if I can make her cum when the mother dies. that would be funny af.

Yeah me too,broke hers next time,still didn't nut,but now the pumps (I guess) have increased from like 4 the first time to the whopping 6

I mean I dated her for 3 years but honestly she was fucking awful in bed. that night I came quick as fuck because i think it was the first time i ever got my dick sucked as well. ever met a girl that doesn't like getting head?

She was just there,legs barely open,I could even put my dick into her properly,I always heard that the first time for women sucks but I think mine too wasn't great,not like the following times were any better

haha, noted. ima do this record it and put it on Yea Forums with a timestamp. tell me i'm not down

this girl i used to talk to HATED giving head, like she hated it; always gagging, hell I had to put her finger in my mouth to show her how to suck it (no homo) long story short i just fucked her in her little ass lol

>Be me
>19
>I wanted to be cool so I hung out with the stoners
>Stoners start doing Adderall
>I start doing Adderall
>Stoners turn into tweakers
>I turn into tweaker
>I start buying in bulk and selling to friends
>Get edgy girls to do meth
>They get hooked on it
>Some can't afford it so I start out making them strip for it
>Do a couple lines with them, they leave I jerk off
>Running low on Ice
>One of girls who would strip calls me
>"Hey user can I have a bumb I'm having withdrawals"
>I'm really horny and I ask her to strip
>I keep staring at her methed out body
>Pull out my stunted stim dick and ask If she minds
>Let's me for last bit of stash
>We fuck hard, its way better than jerking off
>MFW I get tested and find out I lost my virginity and got chlymidia

Attached: 20216-842.jpg (831x841, 76K)

not gunna lie we finished when Wall-E used the fire extinguisher

We've done it to several movies, Infinity war, Wall-E, deadpool, Toystory1-3.

this thread has me horny af ngl

this chick didnt even like GETTING head. really fucked up mentally as she was molested by her father and uncle so she didn't really like sex. after I broke up with her I found a literal nympho so that worked out

Friends sis wakes me up in the night, go to basement and she sucks me, then rides me, eyes are finally adjusting and she asks me to do doggy. I can make out a pic on the wall, old family pic, I’m ramming my toothpick into this girl as she starts crying. I put it together that she’s crying because I’m railing her in front of family portrait of her fam. Parents divorced recently and the cause for the sex was most likely attempts at attention due to divorce. I cum buckets after I realize she’s embarrassed, regretful, upset her family is ruined, and she’s getting her back blown out in front of a literal painting of her (formerly) happy mother, brother, sister, dad and two dogs.

I learned I was a sadist that day. I would pay $200 to confirm the painting anons.

oooooof

i went through my tweaker phase not fun, and fuck i can't imagine how it felt to have chlamydia honestly

Pussies smell like fish when multiple guys have nutted in them.

i "raped" this 15 year old girl when i was 17 at a graduation party

story??

It was like pink eye of the dick, doctor gave me a come to Jesus meeting. We talked for about an hour helped me get into NA. Honestly that doctor played a huge role in my sobriety, so in a way Chlyamidia saved my life. Don't do meth anons, it doesn't seem bad but it fucks up your morals, dopamine receptors, and makes you rationalize every decision.

how badly does it fuck you over after doing it once? I wanna just do it once and that's it. Should I just pass on it?

As in statutory or she withdrew conscent

>be me 16
>lesbian femanon
>dating this nb person
>shitty leftie but not important
>invited me over to their house
>ohnice.png
>for fucking
>OHNICE.png
>set date and go over when it's time
>just me and them
>watched disney movies
>touched her waist
>they instantly get wet and tells me so
>uhok.mov
>finger them for a while
>they come
>i go home

it counts >:(

>be me
>dont have sex ever

Shit was cash

>be 26
>find cute fat 18 year old on tinder
>get coffee with her, make an ass of myself
>she's on her phone the whole time
>awkward hug goodbye
>few days go by
>getting drunk with a friend on my roof
>text her to come over
>she actually says yes
>tell my friend to leave
>i'm pretty drunk, she's distressed
>boyfriend made her mad
>kiss her
>go back to my bed
>she texts her boyfriend it's over
>she sucks my dick
>she says i don't need to use a condom
>came in probably 15 seconds

counts

not much of a story since she was a drunk whore that was getting passed around the party
the next day she covered in cum and tl,d her father that she was an raped
but apparently someone had pictures and a video of her asking for her to be gang banged, which is how i got involved

withdrew consent after the fact and after having multiple guys in her

I would suggest you just do acid. It's a clean stimulant that's not addictive. Some people really do get addicted after one line. It won't damage you permanently, but you'll keep longing for it like pussy. Please take my advice just do some Acid it's much more fun

Fucked a fat bitch in the room above her living room where her parents were, made hella noise rocking the bed into the wall and proceeded to leave the used condom on her bin which her mum found the next day lmao

these two drugs are not similar at all wtf are you talking about

lol for real acid isnt to be fucked with either, a bad experience can be literal hell for 12 hours

I've done acid before, shit was cash. but my best friend's father told us once he did like 4 tabs of it and then didnt want to share the rest of the story. Is one tab enough or should I do two??

You're right but they both are uppers in my opinion. I can't think of another upper I would suggest someone try without feeling morally conflicted.

i did two tabs my first time to make sure i got the full experience. it was fantastic. i've done acid 8 times now - never more than 2 tabs. most important is just having good company.

coke??

>Be me
>15 at the moment
>Older sis asks me to clean her pc
>She lives in her own house (She's 23)
>Start deleting random shit
>I found an anime folder
>"So you watch this stuff too, huh?"
>"Sometimes; yeah"
>Find a manga folder.
>It's full of hentai about older sisters seducing younger brothers
>"user, it's getting late, why don't you stay here?"
>"Nah, the Couch is very little."
>"We both fit in My bed"

>mfw my sis wanted fuck me
>mfw I did stay there
>mfw she touched my pee pee in the middle of the night

I would say take 1 wait an hour then take another, make sure you aren't anywhere near people or dangerous stuff like a ledge or a pitbull

Coke today is so shitty. It's not worth it. Might as well snorted arm and Hammer and jerk off in the mirror

I'll give you that, lsd is an amazing stimulant without physical side effects. but the mental effects that come from it are not exactly what someone who just wants a stimulant might want to feel. coke and meth are easy, like alcohol, lsd can throw you for a loop at any time