Hey Yea Forums. Kinda a weird request. How can I make a discreet makeshift dildo...

Honestly this

Op here.

They don't search me or my room, but
1. Don't have good hiding places
And
2. It's still kinda a what if situation. Don't want that confrontation.

You have your entire room, dumbass.

Learn how to sculpt with a knife, buy carrots, make dildo, use it, cut it up into tiny pieces and eat/flush it down the toilet

Use the handle of a hairbrush. If you want to make it seem more casual just leave that fuckin brush hanging out in the open (clean obviously). It's a regular thing to have and the handles tend to be a good size n length.

I own a multitude to toys and have roommates. Ive got my room and not many hiding spots. I literally use a black duffle bag that just sits in the corner of my room.

Right, easy enough. All you need an appropriately sized phallic object that you have a good reason to have that doesn't involve your ass.

kek

lmfao

Vagina with timestamp or gtfo

Use the sharp bit just before the bristles you snapped off, without lubricant or protection. You'll get....ANAL CAVITIES! AHAHAHA

>Use the handle of a hairbrush. If you want to make it seem more casual just leave that fuckin brush hanging out in the open (dirty, obviously). It's a regular thing to have and the handles tend to be a good size n length.

FTFY

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kek

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I've seen this image so many times, I'm pretty sure I've even saved it... but I have never noticed the FUCKING GARDEN GNOME BEFORE

For me, it was the cornholer or whatever they call the corn dildo. I didn't notice it or the hand/fister toy at first glance.

Attached: some random anon's collection.jpg (3264x1836, 1.11M)

Lost

just buy a dildo and put it in a drawer or something, and then tell your roommates not to look in that drawer cuz thats where you keep all your sex toys, and then laugh. they'll think its just some awkward joke and never bother you about it

shove a pickle up your ass and film it so you can post it and we may kek

had same dilemma, bough dildo & keep it in sock in the back of my drawer. just think of something

Wow a real life gae man

can't you put two fingers up your ass and call it a day?

i've had a multitude of roommates and none have ever found any of my sex toys, just throw em in a drawer and don't act suspicious and they'll have no reason to suspect anything. and if they do find them tell them to eat penis, it ain't their business what you shove in your ass

You must be straight here

Is everybody on this Christian anime board gay?

Just go to a sex shop and buy a dildo man. Or order one off Amazon or whatever. They dont open your mail, do they?

gay kids all over the world can tell you that you dont need to "make" one

go buy a fucking toilet plunger and stick it up your ass

same size as most dicks

Are bi boys just lazy these days? When I was a teenager I just asked a girl who was over 18 to buy me a dildo.

How’s your asshole holding up all these years later?

I haven't done anal in a long time actually. Last time was maybe a year ago when I got pegged.

Saucy

It was... different, for sure.

>three foot long dick
>1 inch thick
kek

>implying his entire room consists of more than a mattress in the middle of the floor

I see you’re a man of culture as well as a gentleman and a scholar

Not really. Used to be the case but it eventually stopped as more and more users became women.

So is this thread gonna end in tits or what

It's definitely hot. Hard to describe. I think my favorite part was just being able to feel pleasure without like... performing. All I had to do was arch my back and take it while she fucked me.

She even came first... which was really hot.

That sounds hot in an “every day we stray farther from god” kind of way.

Kek
But true

Buy these. They're called bottle preforms, they're used in molds for bottles. They're put in a machine and air is blown into them under high pressure so they expand into plastic bottles.

A standard bottle cap fits on them. A lot of hobby stores sell small items inside these preforms, like shit for crafting bracelets or w/e. Just put a bunch of thumbtacks inside them or something so it doesn't look suspicious.

When you wanna use it, remove items from inside, fill with warm water and insert in pooper. Feels really gud when it's all hot/warm from water.

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Well, it was definitely hedonistic. There was a bottle of wine and a peach involved. We made each other feel good in a lot of ways. Here's where I act like a fag and admit that we were dear friends who have since lost touch.

just use candles

look up 1 man 1 jar

This is made from plastic, it doesn't crack.

im sexually active since im 12, start with just a finger now i can take 2" girth and 12" long without a problem im 22 and i dont have any problem at all never shit myself by mistake if thats what you wanna hear lol, stop watching porn and reading myths on the internet and live a little, if you stop doing anal sex in 1 or 2 weeks is like you never did it, if you wanna have a gapping ass you need to trainning daily.

Buy some Legos and build one

Buy some rubber gloves and fuck yourself with your fingers.

no, you retard. Plastic isn't fragile like glass

Depends on the plastic and how structurely weak the lattace is. Could very well splinter or crack and cut your anus or colon open. Same reason you don't buy things with pointed ends. You're shoving shit up your anus and prodding into your internal organs. Be smart about it, because you tear/perforate your colon.

Your anus is a muscle. It CAN get worn out over MANY years and repeatedly using large objects.

That's why OP should do what you said and use a finger, sharpie, makeup tube, lotion dispenser, or other small household objects such as toilet plunger handles.