Yea Forums forms a party and goes on a grand adventure over vast fantasy lands

I can smoke a mad bowl

A laughably small penis

....rincewind?

I can cum almost immediately to zoo porn.

cynicism and sarcasm And I can brew beer from scratch

I'm the guy who's half-blind, tone-deaf, has no knowledge of ancient tomes or useful engineering, and really can't talk that well to a crowd either.

But when it comes down to finding the best price for a piece of loot, you'll bet I'll haggle to the last copper penny.

I can through some good punches

I bring social justice, i am the white knight
I seek those who are against my beliefs
I hunt these witches, put up posters and spread their unjust beliefs to their neighbors, lords and communities
I will tell others of their violent hatred, to raise mobs and pogroms against them and their livelyhoods, their families
We will beat, maim, torture and kill the believers to purge them of their violent hatred
I will not allow hateful words being spread, i will not allow offensive humour based in bigotry to be spoken
I have led a long campaign against the orange men, the most vile of bigots
I will help my fellow adventurers by reminding them of their privileged ways
Urging them to give alms to those ethnicities that deserve them
By listening to them speak, always seeking the bigot and the heretic and will attack them and turn them in if they dare to be intolerant and hateful, or show any sign of such beliefs
I will gatekeep them from associating, speaking, and cooperating with bigots
I will strike out at any autocratic, facist, or racist ethnicities that seek to dominate others or have done so in the past
My associates are everywhere, in every guild, every company, every fiefdom
They whisper the names of those who harbor bigotry and intolerance, and any of certain ethnicities that are known to harbour prejudice
I will uplift the downtrodden, i will advocate women and those of discriminated and fringe sexualities
At even a hint or a whisper bigots will be ruthlessly destroyed, their reputations annihilated, their livelyhoods smashed, and any who advocate or stand in our way will have been proven to be bigoted as well, and will face similar treatment
I will not suffer the bigoted, the heretic, the non believer, racists, sexists, and the foul orange men.

I will suck and fuck the adventurers. Take it in the mouth, pussy and ass.

For morale

Well you can just fuck off right now, Never gonna be picked unless we need someone to feed to nigger canabils

you're in even if you look like boxxy the team likes your spirit

I have found a heretic! He speaks the hateful speech! He does not wish for cannibals to immigrate into peaceful lands! He is a rapist! A sexist! A bigot! A racist! A foul orange man!

RISE MY NPCS!

Yay!
*hops around merrily while scantily clad*
Im also good at making distractions

I can tavern with a fight in a beer.

Attached: guinness-pint-glass.jpg (1000x1000, 53K)

Cleric tank

You will walk the path of light or you will walk no path at all.

Attached: clb5x9nauaj21.jpg (640x637, 63K)

Attached: 1508335276659.jpg (600x400, 56K)

I collect flammable liquids and give unhelpful advice

Attached: 1544088930121.png (790x837, 242K)

I bring quality

Medic and gun dude

I can cum and hold my dick at about 0.8 stiffness after, that's enough to fuck

i brong borger

I have a weapon that magically at my will spits fire. I call it "The portable dragon". Also, I got a helmet

Attached: imagesDZS13P83.jpg (166x200, 8K)

you do the cock block

i can give hugs uwu

So, you're white

TL;DR

Attached: 1397978189734.gif (427x240, 1.67M)

Laghack-cable pulling

Me? Heh. A failure like me has nothing to offer but my skill with the sword alone. In a fight, I am peerless, for I have followed the way of the sword for as long as I remember.

so current members of the party:
the guy who knows that feel
some colorblind dude
a lucky motherfucker
knuckles the wall-eyed ugandan navigator
an anti-semite with the rage ability
Rincewind the lucky mage, champion of the gods
a wavy eyebrow man
Ricky from trailer park boys
the man who smokes large quantities of insanity inducing herbs for fun
some guy with a micropenis
an unabashed zoophile
a sarcastic, skeptical beer brewer
a handicapped haggling expert. the anti-semite barbarian is suspicious of him
a monk named john cena
some guy the party will TK at the first opportunity
an expert of distraction, the team thot
a drunken master
an overweight, priestly tank
sean bean with an anime sized sword
a dude laden with lantern oil, petrol, and alchemists fire that will not help when decision making
a scholarly healer wielding an arquebus
a guy who unintentionally cockblocks the other members of the party, as he emanates that big dick energy and is known for his sexual stamina. gets along well with the party thot
a reporter for pew news
a grizzled artificer with a mechanized firespell device, and a sturdy helm
a cute huggy androgynous fellow
a guy who can break the laws of physics
a swordsmaster

so with the current members, what could we do Yea Forums?

I look white. I'm mostly white. I'm 25% Polish (No Jewish blood from that, lucky me). I also have some Melungeon ancestry, and they're well known for evasion, passing as Native Americans or Portuguese. I'm mostly of English decent though, with a lot of pagan ancestors.

We're good to go.

I accept my role

>what could we do Yea Forums?

We wouldn't make it past the edge of the starting village.

Attached: 1534968270014.jpg (786x528, 87K)

Would could enter peacefully, then everything gets rekt?

World domination. ONWARDS, HO!

bring booze, and hired muscle

Attached: 1551354523156.png (348x355, 175K)

Im a shifter who can be a Human, Anvil, or Cambodian Cane Frog.

Attached: 1549974415216.gif (250x250, 755K)

Attached: 1549892374646.jpg (698x942, 95K)

in the starting village. all is peaceful
>the thot begins flirting with the wavy eyebrow man
>gets cockblocked by the man radiating big dick energy
>the lucky guy finds a golden key in the mud
>knuckles the navigator begins looking over his maps, finding routes to other villages
>the herbalist begins smoking herbs
>the micropenis guy stares at the cockblocker with envy
>the zoophile notices some nearby livestock, gets a boner and salivates
>the beer brewer and the handicapped haggler go to the market to get a good deal on some yeast
>the drunken master drinks from his wine skin
>the priestly tank is called a pedophile by the SJW white knight, an argument ensues
>sean bean with the anime sized sword dies
>the arsonist notices every building in twn is flammable
>the healer cleans his arquebus, observing the argument between the cleric and the white knight
>the swordmaster also watches while cleaning and sharpening his blade
>the artificer with the flamesprayer watches as well, shares trail rations with the healer and swordmaster
>the huggy androgynous fellow tries to break up the argument with hugs, white knight condemns him for hugging cleric
>guy who can break the laws of physics suddenly has multiple of his expensive items, moves to the market to sell shit
>the antisemite barbarian notices the handicapped haggler, squeezes the handle of his axe angrily
> a man of questionable ethnicity approaches, asks the swordmaster, artificer, and the healer what the argument is about
> not long later, a frog wearing aviators and smoking a cigar steps out of the town hall with some thugs
>a can frog ribbits
> pepis the tender notices the countenance of the zoophile, becomes concerned
> someone suggests a route to world domination to knuckles
>knuckles says "i know de wey"

I can resupply the flamethrower user, and now people down with an M60

Attached: T4loHcxO.jpg (724x724, 74K)

No filthy trickster elves will get anywhere near my frens, I can smell them miles away and my weapons all have +50 knife ear damage

Attached: 1452087651155.jpg (1024x768, 132K)

Well if I wasnt injured and was in normal form.
Srength, Endurance, Survival training, Trained in hand to hand combat, fantastic accuracy with melee weapons due to labor working with hammers and such. Wild edible foods, trapping, hunting, fishing, also have knowledge.

Attached: 1550298678574.jpg (1834x2047, 536K)

DM here, should i keep going?

I need to know what happens between chonky priest tank and white knight

Attached: skele-pepe.jpg (1171x1181, 219K)

Narcissistic sociopath, so...
1. Maxed persuasion
2. Maxed charisma
3. Ability to do bad shit without feeling remorse

/out/-guy here AND I can pick up stuff neatly with my toes

yes

I can do a backflip

the village is not so peaceful anymore
>the wavy eyebrow man walks over to the micropenis guy, moral support guy consoles them and says hes knows that feel
>the lucky guy with the golden key examines it, it appears to be dwarven in make
>Knuckles the navigator finds a path to a dwarven ruin that contains powerful artifacts that could be used for conquest
>the zoophile moves to the fence, leans on it and begins trying to catch the attention of a goat
>pepis the tender approaches him with questions
>the beer brewer and the handicapped haggler are getting in an argument with a merchant, the haggler keeps replying with "what?"
>the SJW white knight yells loudly while pointing at the cleric, stating that he and the huggy androgynous fellow are racists, rapists and pedophiles
>everyone stares at the three awkwardly
>the swordmaster, healer and artificer tell the man of questionable ethnicity that the argument is over "some bullshit"
>a man with a strange looking arquebus and a sturdy helm approaches the Artificer, swordmaster, and healer
>the artificer greets him, they have similar helms
>the healer looks at his arquebus, and at his own, flabbergasted
>they all eat trail rations and watch the drama unfold
>the arsonist begins walking through town, looking for a secluded location
>the guy who can break the laws of physics takes dead sean bean anime sword, and already has the best gear in the game and millions of gold
>the antisemite barbarian approaches the haggler and the brewer angrily
>the frog with the cigar and thugs begins approaching the SJW white knight
a knight appears, and sees the SJW white knight. an 'elf lover' he thinks. and spurs his horse forwards, telling his squire to keep close and have a lance at the ready
a man walks into town wearing armour he made himself, with game and pelts slung over his shoulder from the woods, notices the commotion around the cleric and white knight

I can speak sand-nigger if y'all get in trouble with them

charisma

I'm a coward who can't fight on open fields, but I can hold a high wall as long as I have my crossbow and long spear

Attached: 1534852410186.png (900x1344, 876K)

Im a good leader, have a tendencey to organize things, and maintain morale.

Also really easy to get along with, and i genuinely like almost everyone i meet

Also, i have a deep seated sadistic streak and a blood fetish, and years of repressed homicidal rage.

Gimme a spear/sword and a board, ill be the tank.

Attached: Whitestrake.png (318x395, 79K)

chaos ensues

a man with cold, unfeeling eyes steps out of the town hall, drawn by the commotion. he sees his frog boss and the thugs approach the SJW white knight
a local jester troupe one doing backflips and the other picking up objects with his toes loses his audience to the commotion
>the Thot begins making out with big dick energy guy, alot of groping. some peasant tells them to "get a room" and big gick energy guy suggest renting a room at the tavern
>the consolation guy, the micropenis guy, and wavy eyebrow guy overhear this, and decide to go to the tavern as well, but to drink instead.
>the drunken master notices them heading to the tavern and moves unsteadily in that direction, wanting to drink with some friends
>the hurbalist loads another bowl and chuckles at the argument ensuing
>the barbarian asks the handicapped haggler "if he's a fucking kike"
>the haggler says "what?"
>the frog with thugs asks what the problem is here
>the cleric begins to speak but the white knight screams, REEEEs and lays accusations on the cleric and huggy fellow
>the hunter in self made armor moves to the market to trade his furs and game for metal, notices the barbarian, haggler and brewer arguing
>the frog with thugs sees the mounted knight approach the SJW white knight, and says "fren of yours?"
>the artificers, healer, and swordmaster agree that the drama is gettin gud
>some random guy starts throwing insults in sand nigger at the white knight

>Hushed tone
>Good day to you. I beg your pardon and mean no harm swordmaster, healer, & artificer. Might I inquire what this argument is about?

Attached: ricky_tpb3.jpg (480x640, 33K)

Yes please!

the best character from the best tv show

all hell breaks loose
>at the tavern, the thot and big dick energy guy are at the tavern, renting a room from the barkeep
>the thot becomes distracted by a charismatic fellow sitting at the bar, he ofeers to buy them drinks, thot urges big dick energy to stay and have a drink
>one of the local guards is watching the commotion in the center of town, gulps
another knight enters town on horseback, sees his comrade approaching a white knight SJW elf lover and many able looking men in the town square, as well as a wall eyed fellow with many maps and another fellow with a large golden key
> "Hold, white knight" yells the mounted knight
>"art thou a member of the order of social justice?!"
>the white knight finally shuts up, stutters
>the frog and his thugs step back, the frog chuckling and smoking his cigar
>the cold eyed man joins the frog boss "this should be good" the frog agrees and says "if the white knight survives take him to the dungeon. we dont need his type in Yea Forums town."
>they reply, stating that its "some bullocks, started by the white knight"
>they offer ricky some trail rations
>the barbarian keeps asking the haggler is hes a kike, the haggler keeps saying "what?" the barbarian gets angry
> the jesters close up shop and move towards the white knight, angry that he stole their audience
>the crowd that has formed around the arguement parts like the red sea, an open lane between the white and mounted knight

My penis

>the drunken master, micropenis guy, wavy eyebrow dude, and consolation fellow get a table, and chuckle at the big dick energy guy getting cockblocked by a charismatic fellow
> the cleric speaks to the mounted knight "this man is a liar and a fool! and has spoken ill of the church!"
>the cleric grips his warhammer
>the mounted knights squire rides up alongside him and prepares a lance
> the mounted knight asks the white knight "what say you in your defense!?"
>the knight captain approaches knuckles and the lucky fellow, "what is it you have their scholar?"
>ricky, the swordmaster, and the two artificers and the man of questionable ethnicity eat and watch
>ricky produces some pepperoni and vodka, and shares it with his newfound friends, and asks "should we help the guy?"
>"nah" they others reply
>ricky notices the man of questionable ethnicity "hey you got some smokes pal?"
>pepis the tender asks what the zophile is doing
>the zoophile responds "that a sexy chicken you got there"
>the arsonist lights one of the thatched roof in town on fire, the fire begins to spread slowly
>he returns to knuckles, the lucky guy and the knight captain, and notices the commotion in the center of town he says "we should help that white knight guy"
another guy approaches the thot and her two suitors, also radiating big dick energy
>the cane frog hops over to the boss frog "boss we got a fire on the far side of town"
>the guy who can break physics disappears

the cat whisperer. My family owned two cats and they seemed to like me more than anyone else

>now there are three men around the thot, and she is loving the attention
>the micropenis, wavy eyebrow, consolation fellow and drunken master order several pitchers and begin to binge drink
> the white knight SJW speaks "how dare you question me and my order! what we stand for is pure, this cleric associates with pedophiles, and therefore is a pedophile! and you sir are a racist and a bigot! i can tell by your heraldry!"
>the mounted knight grabs the lance from his squire "you have insulted my honour, sir! steel yourself, for i shall show no mercy!"
>the cleric draws his warhammer
>the knight charges, levelling his lance at the white knight
>the white knight turns and runs
>the frog boss says, hold on, to the cane frog "this is getting interesting"
>the local guard says "oh shit" and begins running down to stop the fight
>the lucky guy says to the knight captain "this key i found unlock some dwarven ruin"
>knuckles looks up at the knight captain and says "i know de wey"

Fat reserves so I won't starve to death.

I drink a lot of alcohol.

this thread shouldn't die you fucking faggots

>the sjw knight turns and throws himself through a doorway
>the door caves in, and crushes a cat
>the owner of the house screams as all the other cats cry out in terror
>the sjw knight gets up and runs out the back of the house
>the cleric looks dwn an alleyway and sees him fleeing, level his warhammer and casts hold person on the white knight
>the white knight freezes in place as the mounted knight rides arounf the end of the block and appears the the end of the road
>the mounted knight charges, and although the white knight tries his hardest to will himself to run, he cannot
-the crowd, including the artificers, healer, man of questionable ethnicity, the swordsmaster, and ricky all move to get a good view
-ricky sees the guard coming yelling to halt the violence, and trips him casually
>the guard falls into the mud face first
>the cane frog hops up on the frog bosses shoulder
>"go get im boys, bring him to the dungeon when theyre done" the boss saysto his thugs, and they move into the crowd
>"get to the dungeon and prepare it for our guest" the frog boss says to the cold eyed man "id like to get some word out of him before he expires"
>the psychotic man nod and leaves, his mind full of what he will do to the white knight
>meanwhile in the tavern
>wavy eyebrow guy, the drunken master, micropenis guy, and consolation fellow
>are joined by a fat guy
>and the town drunk
>the three men cocblocking each other over the thot have drank some as well, and their competition becomes quarrelsome
>the wavy eyebrow guy shows what he can do with his eyebrows to a wench, she laughs and says hes cute
>micropenis guy chugs a pint

Archery, vast herbal knowledge, keen survival instincts, stealth.

Intensely fast crawling. Running on all fours

a hunter who lives by himself in the forest.

I'll set off the traps (and I don't mean guys dressed as girls)

Attached: whitey gets pissed on.gif (500x335, 2M)

I have donned my armor and am ready for battle!

Attached: cat.jpg (640x813, 205K)

didn't you fucking hear?

bump for interest

getting much to attached to this storyline

>3 Berserkers appear

Attached: 1522759091819.jpg (1920x1080, 341K)

Nice art. Where did you get it from?

Yea Forums

Attached: 1522757502491.jpg (1264x632, 143K)