Got in a fist fight with my dad AMA. I have blood on my chothes. I'm not bleeding

fuck how don't your remember? I remember my fist fights..

Hes not a drunk but he's verbally and emotionally abusive. About who got the best - his face was bleeding and he wasn't able to land one punch on me but at one time put mi i guillotine choke and shit was bad for me. The he got the emotional best - he was yelling absolute shit and I was afraid. I don't want to squash the beef he has always shown hate towards me -why should I feel love and respect for him?

It happaned few hours ago. We've not spoken wince I got out of the house.

I remember some part but throwing my first punch I was very emotional and I did it very fast -it's my first fist fight out of a gym.

Well he was dominating with stature and weight but I have more accurate and fast punches. Things god bad for me when we got on the ground.

Yes and no. He got really angry and my anger fell to the floor and that's why he was trembling with blood on his face but not out of fear but trembling with anger.

you should love and respect him because he's your dad. doesn't mean you have to like him. he's still there and still in your life and has more than likely worked hard to provide for you. a lot of the bullshit that happens between kids and their parents is due to the kids getting around that age where they think they know everything and are incredibly disrespectful w/o even realizing it really. my stepdad and I got along when I was young then again when I grew up. had some real rocky years in between but we're good to go now. mind you this is just my experience with that kind of thing. i don't know the situation obviously. what kind of shit does he do? him and your mom still together and get along?

Thanks for the Pepe I hope things go well for ya

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A similar situation happened to me too, didnt end up in blood but we exchanged a couple bows.
Id suggest u to go and apologize for what happened, for ur own sake. U dont want that shit to haunt at night when u get older. Its not about whos right its about being able to look urself in the mirror and know for sure that ur not a violent person which it sounds like ur not.
Unfortunately some aspects of some parents are just toxic shit, cant do anything but turtle and run as soon as u can

that's what happens when you talk now look X)

was alkohol involved?

I don't share your opinion -toxinc people don't deserve love even if they're your parents. But if it's needed let's agree to disagree. What does he do? He yells hatefull thing and makes you feel hated,scared and so many other things that I can't figure out how to describe. He yells ,he bangs on furniture ,he trows things out the window ,he breaks stuff ,he bangs doors ,he insults ,he threatens with suicide (I was 5 when he first told me I'm the reason and he's going out to do it). My mom left him loong ago. My bro's mom told him to leave her apartment and tried protecting her kid by suing my dad. I was going to speak up infront of the judge but I was afraid of being looked down on by the rest of the world for disrespecting my dad(for me he's my abuser)

Fuck his wife user

>why should I feel love and respect for him?
For your own sake. Half of him is in you so he will still be a part of your life after he's long dead, whether you like it or not. People that put this shit aside don't do too well later in life, it may be best to try and separate yourself and your brother from him for the time being however. How old are you OP?

I've had problems respecting myself because of the opposite - not saying anything. I'm actually proud of myself for beating my fear and doing what I've always wanted.

No. He's just a bad person.

He doesn't have one.No sane woman wants to stay with him for too long.

You are right about him being half of me. But I'm tired of forgivig him and not giving him what he deserves.

Also I cant't do much for my bro. He lives with his mom and sees our dad once a week. I think I can talk to child protection services.

its good that ur able to defend urself and ur little brother, and its good that u were able to beat ur fears.
U shouldnt be the one thinking about giving him what he deserves, its not ur role u should think about urself and how to get out of that dreadful environment. Why dont u live with ur little brothers mom?
Also how old are u OP?

She's not my mom so we can't live together. I'll be living with my older sis. I'll have to go to his apartement again tomorrow to get my things and I hope he doesn't start anything. I'm a university student that'll tell you my age. I don't feel good about not living on my own but no one can afford it at my age in eastern europe.

I can understand that, it may not be the right time for forgiveness if you are locked in a struggle right now. A period of separation may be necessary, but it will come back with a vengeance if you don't deal with it in due time. Anger is a sign of weakness and emotional immaturity, don't let it take hold of you as it has taken hold of him.

Yea, not even in western europe im afraid. Living by ur sister seems like a legit solution for now, just be sure not to give him any pretext for further discussion

Damn, he sees his son once a week and acts like a retard when he's there? He's got to have some sort of trauma to be that weak, or could it be he's on drugs and you don't know about it? Not that that excuses anything, but it may help you understand why this is happening

I've thought about what you said alot ALOT and I agree absolutely. I've always wanted to get him out of my life and never see him again and that's what I'm thinking of doing now. I think it's best -that way I'll avoid further confrontations.

Thank you for the support and the advice is good and I will talk to him only what is minimally needed.

Did you guys kiss afterwards?

Probably trauma- I've never met my grandpa because he died aged 50 long before I was born. It's problematic because he's good one moment and rages in the next - Other people think he's a really nice guy but they don't know him. Also he's a pilot so it's definetly not drugs - check ups and so on.

no

Sir, could you please make a habit of typing the "yo-" before the "u"? Your posts are painful to read and it would be very little effort on your part.

Sincerely,
Autists everywhere.

Sorry I'm typing from my phone and my english is not that good either, expecially written.
Hope you won't need the extra dose of meds tonight

It's natural to feel this way, although I would suggest not actually leaving for good. You'll need to come to terms with him eventually so maybe check up on him in a year or two, as circumstances permit. I assume this will be difficult for you to consider right now, but there's something in human psychology that if you shut the door completely then they just say "why should I bother trying to get better". If you signal to him, even very subtly, that he may one day be forgiven even though it will be a long and difficult process, he may get his shit together in due time. It'll probably take more than a year or two though, so just try to live your life as best as you can and just ask him how he's been doing every once in a while, even if it's just to make sure he isn't mistreating your bro.

You have every right to be outraged, but it will take real strength of character not to be, and that's the challenge you face if you want to move on with your life. Since conquering his anger is something your father was never capable of doing, you will only be able to outgrow him this way

Thanks user. I wish I had meds man

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how old are you op?

Thank you. Well last year he told me that because he's my father he'll never give up on me and now he told me that from now on I don't have a father. His support was condition and only if I listened and kept my eyes closed for his shit. That's why I don't trust parents anymore when they talk about how much they love their children. Also I've grown up wanting to get away from him and I gave up on this dream once and look where it got me. I agree about challenge of conquering anger - it's tought but it's very important.

I've heard it's not good to mention real age on Yea Forums si I'll just say I'm in university.

See
OP seems shy about telling us