>be me
>living with parents
>no efficient way to dispose of cum without being caught
>just cum into trash can most days
>finishing up a round
>obnoxiously thirsty
>grab wendy's drink out of trash
>just melted ice but whatever
>drink
>
>oh god
>some of my cum got into the drink
>throw it on the ground
Well, it's been fun. Looks like I'm finally one of you fags now
Have some self fucking respect and buy some tissues or something.
Think they're going to be all "Oh no, user you're masturbating! How could you?"
Could never use tissues. Cum always shoots out past the tissue and I end up with more of a mess than just nutting into a trash can and cleaning up my cock and hands with a rag
Wank into a sock you filthy animal
Act like an adult, and cum in your hand and slurp it down
cum inside mother
there now your problem is solved
Why would you waste the lives of trees for this? Just jack off outside or in the shower.
gatorades are supposed to be good because of all the minerals they include. your piss has even more minerals.
use the info above wisely if you're still thirsty
Don't do this ^
It gives socks a discolored stain and makes them hard.
Just use paper towels and wrap/fold it infront of wherever you're about to splooge mate. Tissues get shot through and look suspicious anyways, but a paper towel you just toss in the trash and it blends in with the rest of the dumb shit. Just cumming in the can like a complete retard would probably get you caught as well because all the surface area has got to be the smelliest shit ever to someone who doesn't sleep in your room. You probably don't even notice how fucking gross your room would smell with a buildup like that. Be more self aware you weird fuck
you're not supposed to wear the designated quiet wife after you cum in it
Anything to get OP to stop jizzing all over the trash cans in his house. The lorax will forgive us.
I hope you haven't gone your entire life complaining about paper towels, tissues, and toilet paper because your dumb ass thinks they're made out of trees. It's made from cotton, one of the worlds most renewable resources.
OP doesn't want to get caught by parents and cums in a fucking trash can, you think he does his own laundry?
Why don't you just cum into a couple kleenex and flush it? Or if you're under some sort of constant observation, just put the cum kleenex in the trash folded up so you know what it is, then flush it later?
i used to cum/pee in mineral water bottles, then rinsed, washed, and repeated to avoid waking up parents.
cum bottles would eventually become foggy. pee bottles started growing shit that looked like tiny yellow sugar crystals. My mom found them once, but it looked/smalled to gross to even know what it was
i don't use tissues to fap but i worry that having tissues right next to me on my desk makes my parents think i'm using them to masturbate when i'm honest to god just using them to clean my nose or for an emergency napkin or some shit
Gotcha motherfucker. I'm looking at a bag of Member's Mark Less Lint Ultra Premium brap rags RIGHT NOW and it says they're made from sustainably managed forests.
>drinks old melted ice out of fast food cup from trash
>drinks own cum
>lives with parents
user, you were ALWAYS one of us.
implying cotton doesn't grow in forests
Drink your own cum, like the rest of us do. No evidence is left after you cum.
If you're afraid to be called a faggot then you should go back to
A work around for this is to grab a paper towel or two from the kitchen when you get food, when food arrives, etc. Then keep one folded and stored when you decide you want to jack off