Parents watching big bang theory in the living room

thank god for that

>parents tell me to watch some show about a severely autistic kid
>"he reminds me of you"

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>Mother walks in room
>”user, why are doing nothing with your life?”
>M-mom, it’s my day off from work, and I’m currently in college trying to better my futur-
>”Why can’t you be more like your cousins? Successful and a good paying job? Why don’t you have a girlfriend? Are you gay? Don’t you want kids? You’re wasting your life away.”

Why try when you’re brought down everyday?

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this
try to enjoy the little things as much as you can, I wish I did

hey here to explain the joke you see I was making a joke that this thread isn't at all video game related and is getting annoying at this point seeing the same meme posted for the billionth time it's old as shit at this point we get it you hate your parents for liking cringy shit go change your diaper faggot thank you.

Yes, I am, indeed quite homosexual.

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Why do people not realize that isn't a compliment?

Sheldor is based and redpilled

youtube.com/watch?v=ODWnkrUAKhQ

>look handsome in a similar way
No. Fuck that. Fuck them.

>Parents gave up on me a long time ago and never asked these sorts of questions
feels good

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>you will never be this autistic

>Hate my parents
>Have hated both of them since my childhood
>Tried mending things because I know they won't be around forever, and I'll regret it
>Somehow finding my hate growing each and every time I try

Fuck, man. I think they've still got a solid 10 years left at the least so I guess I got time, but nothing I try is working. At this point I think it's honestly more of a me issue.

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>wasted my late teens
>bouncing back in my early twenties
It's amazing what a consistent sleep schedule and working out can do

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bazinga XD

>parents and extended family streaming Watamote
>haha user, that's just like you

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Well yeah. Actual nerds are desperate lonely faggots who need reassurance that getting a GF will make them truly happy.

Not much more you can do, fuck her

>In college and have a job
>REEE WHERE'S MY GRANDCHILDREN
top kek, sorry to hear, user.

I'm rubber and youre autistc get fucked nerd

>was a fucking hyper turbo fat (42 BMI) for most of my life
>hit 25
>realise I need to fix that shit and if it's not now when the fuck is it
>currently pretty healthy, doctor outright said I don't need lose more weight, I'm 5'9, 155lbs (23 BMI)
>turning 27 in a week
>still KHV and can't hold a job and sat on a worthless degree in a subject that sounds good but is too vague to be useful

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Woah......
This personal anecdote really made me thingk I was on /r9k/..........
Thanks op.........

Same except I haven't hit the bouncing back part yet

Stop watching anime faggot

>parents, high school friends: "You're amazing user, you're gonna kill it in post-secondary"
>years later, lonely and bored with only art and vidya keeping me going

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>you're just like sheldon
I heard this no less than 4 times from FOUR SEPARATE PEOPLE with no knowledge of each other.
>HAHAHA! SEE? Just like something Sheldon would say!

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theirs only one thing for it kill yourself leave a note in painstaking detail why this is what pushed you over the edge it's the only way they'll learn your sacrifice may save your siblings / cousins gods speed

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Don't make me use real jutsu on your ass.

>he doesn't get stoned with his mom
Come on, user.

>aqua poster
sounds about right

Pull up

>having retarded parents

>Big Onions Show

Now i wonder how it would be if all of the show's casts were replaced with Yea Forumsirgins

I got my degree but not a job, now I'm sad and bitter. If only people didn't encourage me.

I watch BIg Bang with my parents. Spend time with them, they love you user.

Also the show does actually have some good jokes from time to time (Almost always from Howard.)

If you really hate your parents then there's no reason to reach out to them, family like that is just """"toxic"""".

Only person I know who likes that show is everyone's least favorite aunt.

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much better
>that episode where Sheldon SWATs his own roommate

And his joke was that he presented a video game about the anime in retort. Funny.

fuck you for even suggesting that

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I honestly do want to kill myself but the main reason would be to see the aftermath, and since that isn't possible I can't be motivated to do it

Why do they do this?

Failure doesn't hurt
Having people to disappoint does

Call mum out on her shit user

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>leave note simply saying, "Bazinga"
Now your suffering is over and you've ruined something they enjoyed, something that may have reminded them of you
Take that, parents

BAZINGA

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*Laugh track plays*

fuck you for being a bad son

>mom keeps asking me if i have a GF yet
>she asked me if i was gay

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Start doing it to her user.

Wrong, you just go "Oh, is that so." in a not-at-all interested kind of way. If it's a woman pointing it out they'll usually start talking about the similarities between you, at which point you can tune out and just go "Yeah all right." by the end.

She's trying to be supportive of your alternative lifestyle, faggot

I feel your pain.

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Literally watching it with them now I love my family

>mother literally torturing the household and extended family with her substance abuse and cuntery, ruined my childhood and upbringing and fucked me irreparably as an adult
>YOU'RE A BAD SON LOL
swallow a bucket of nails

i'm just a fat fuck and poor but i refuse to lower my standards, that's my problem.

>"It's okay if you are gay, too! A boyfriend, I don't mind, as long as you are happy!"

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You lashing out at faggots on an anonymous image board certainly won't fix the way your mother behaves or your relationship with her. The best thing to do would be to find a nice girl who isn't like your mom and start a family with her. Be the person your parents couldn't be, that's a reward within itself

Bros. I'm in my last year of high school and I'm so goddamn lonely. How do you make friends this late in the game?

she said she wants one of her kids to get married before she dies

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Just be yourself

it doesn't

>high school
>late in the game
your life hasn't even started yet and you're already calling it quits, cut that shit out

If you go to college, go to orientation holy fuck. Don't forget that.

"The blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb."

You can't pick your family, but you can pick your friends. Choose wisely.

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Fucking goddamn this shit.
I thought that maybe people would leave me alone when I came out at gay, but now my whole family with this shit every time I see them.
No one loves me despite the fact that I like dick, just give it a rest.

agreed
>that last season finale episode where sheldon shoots up the school

ZIMBABWE

I remember it was hard for me too, just stop worrying about loneliness and work on yourself. Its prime time to get swole, friends aren't necessary

Don't quit your day job.

it's because of her that I hate women and never want to get married

This. Listen to this user, he knows what he's talking about. I didn't go to orientation, I skipped out on all of those icebreaker events thinking they were gonna be some corny, cheesy shit that I was too cool for, thinking that I was gonna make friends and a gf elsewhere, and look how that turned out. Ended up not having any friends during college, there were periods of time where I didn't talk to anyone for 4-5 months at a time. It hurt real bad my freshmen year having to live in the dorms, watching everyone break off into friend groups and hearing constant mirth and laughter around without being able to join in. I tried at some point going around to talk to people but by that point it was too late and I already had that reputation as "that quiet kid who ghosted everyone the first few weeks and is probably fucked in the head"

how do I make friends who don't freak out and try to lecture me if I call something gay

You have to move out.

>adults with kids
>watching anime
it doesn't even have a dub, why would (most likely) normalfags watch subbed anime
but,
>watch watamote
>"are there autists i japan why does she think exactly like me"

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What subject...

How did you turn your situation around?

>literally just started hitting myself in frustration because of my incessant OCD
do I just kill myself at this point

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>IF [CURRENT YEAR] >= 2010
>THAN [FUN] = 0

Cringe
Based

>Here my mum and my aunt talking one day
>Aunt asks if I'm gay and why I don't have a gf yet
>Mum says she doesn't know if I'm gay or straight since I never talk to anyone
How do I get a gf lads, the only people I talk to are people I've known since I was a kid and my boss/lecturers. I break into a sweat at the idea of having to order food, how am I ment to strike up a meaningful conversation with a stranger

That's exactly my point and I knew you would say that. Find a woman who actually cares for and about you, not what you can provide. I was in a hateful relationship the past 4 years, finally met a young woman who has the right ideals and goals and who cares about me as a person. They exist, user, they're just not the ones posting on social media. If you're Christian, try meeting girls through a youth group. If not, look for friends or relatives of people you know and trust. You think I'm stupid, but I'm just trying to look out for other canons. They deserve it, and you do too

I went to all those events
I even became a president of a club and STILL didn't make ANY friends

How do you make friends as an adult, particularly as a NEET? Real, actual, genuine friends? Is it even possible? I don't have any currently and never learned how to make them and I'm too shy and self-conscious to use social media. The only things I've got going for me are that I'm not dumb and that I'm okay at playing the guitar. I'm going to start learning martial arts soon but I seriously doubt I could make actual friends with anyone there.

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>Be me during my spring semester for sophomore year at uni
>Had worked a summer job at a home depot as a lot associate
>Also live in Florida where it can get into the 90s
>Was on leave for work so I could study more
>Last couple of weeks
>Get told by my parents that they called my place and work and told them I was available on weekends
>Get fucking pissed that I don’t have weekends where I could do homework and shit
>Also at that time, had an important exam in one of my classes that I thought was the week after
>I also couldn’t tell my employers I had a test, even if I knew, because it would look bad with them
>Had to skip that class because of work
>Get a 0 on the Exam
>Had to do an extra long assignment to get half credit on the test
>I could of gotten an easy B anyways if it wasn’t for parents being assholes and not letting me relax for the weekend
Wtf.

Just talk to people like you do on Yea Forums.

Ill be your friend. Please im lonely

Oh boy, its much worse than that for me.
>Parents watch some hotline miami shit or something.
>The antagonist is a hacker/gamer that finds private information on a female detective
>He forces her via blackmail to show her tits, through a webcam and that she should meet up with him so he can get more of her
>Detective does as she's told meets up with him, beats him senseless and then starts preaching about social justice and empowered wiimiin
>Mother gives me the death stare
>Father shakes his head in disappointment and disapproval
>Meanwhile I literally din' dun nuthin'

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>people you know and trust
haha, funny joke user
almost as funny as assuming I've ever even held a girl's hand before or even know how to properly socialize

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God i wish i could smell aquas butt

I never once thought I would ever laugh at that word, but the idea of a suicide note saying nothing but bazinga made me laugh way to fucking hard.

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>walk up to some kid out on the street
>"H-hey, is that a Nintendo 3ds? H-ha ha, you're a real autistic fucking nigger, aren't you?"
Somehow I don't think that would work very well

better to be lonely then tormented by schizophrenic delusions and tinnitus fueled hallucinations in tandem. I want to die so badly.

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>being this optimistic
oh user...
I didn't. I graduated and left college friendless, entered the workforce doing engineering work, now a few years later I'm making $200k a year but I have nothing to show for it socially, lonely as fuck and it hurts to say that money means absolute dick when you have no meaningful relationships in your life. Don't fuck it up, go to orientation, go to ALL the shitty icebreaker events your RAs plan out, talk to as many people as you can, if someone invites you out somewhere your first week don't pass up on the chance even if you don't think that you'd be that great of friends with them (people go out in big groups first few weeks of freshman year and that could be a chance to meet someone else in that group), and make sure to occasionally invite people out yourself so it doesn't feel too onesided for them.

General Mathematics

It's too vague to be useful for anything besides teaching. It's always better to specialise.

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Honestly? Go to the bar. Go at weird times, also, and often. You'll start to know the other regulars and then you just sorta blend in with the group. Don't go to a bar that has much older people or younger people than you, try to find people in your age group or people who went to the same college as you. You can sometimes make friends with 40 and 50 something year olds, but only if you're in your 30s to begin with.

Rent free

What country you from, fren?

what if I hate alcohol

Most unrealistic part of the series, especially sheldon. That asexual twat would never be able to mate in real life.

At least with walowitz it was a relief. Dude was annoying as hell when he was single.

>family is so normalfag they literally cannot fathom someone who's never had a girlfriend
>they continue to think I am gay in denial so much I have just gone along with it

>the characters all get gfs
I see you there Shinzo Abe

Have you tried every single kind of alcoholic beverage? Stop lying.

Stop doing that and drink it

>parents ask all through college if I'm dating anyone
>hit 25ish
>don't bother asking anymore
It's depressing and comforting to know that everyone around you has accepted your perpetual singularity, even yourself.

>tfw you're not attractive at all and have zero game but your relatives keep saying you are and ask why you don't have a gf

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Actually this

Why do parents refuse to accept if you're an eternal KV?

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I don't know man, I'm imagining myself doing that and just not making any friends, just losing a lot of money on the beer. Have you done this, do you have experience in this being effective at all?

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I went to orientation and didn't talk to anyone the entire time. I'm too autistic to really start conversations. It's okay because I've convinced myself that I'm happier alone.

I really wish I knew the date of this pic, because this guy really could be rich right now.

l-leave me alone! let me escape my sad, ronery life!

One thing that you have to watch for is telling others to fuck off via body language. I suffered from that really badly, I thought that everyone around me instinctively knew I was bad news and stayed away from me, but after talking to them years later it turned out that like half believed I wanted nothing to do with them and the other half just didn't notice me. I attribute the first to the tense body language and behavior I developed to get some family members to leave me alone (which, funnily enough, I never thought worked because they denied the existence of all of my boundaries no matter what, but they did lay off enough for it to be worthwhile) and the second to the distant, detached behavior I developed to get people in general to leave me alone.

It turns out I do get on fine with people, not outstandingly but as good as anyone, but that didn't show up for years because I believed people were threats and basically flexed on them with years of experience in avoidant behavior.

If this is your problem you might be surprised, most friendships aren't developed consciously, they're the result of frequent contact and compatibility.

I wouldn't recommend that he drinks, that might force him to use alcohol as a crutch. If his problem is detachment and avoidance he needs to face that head on.

>sister: user youre just like Sheldon..
*I stop Fortnite dancing with my nephews and turn towards her*
*dab on her*
>Me: I am going to say the N word
>Sister: Dont you fucking dare
>Me: Nigger nigger
*start highspeed dabbing, nephews follow suit*
>Nigger nigger nigger

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Not him but my family was full of alcoholics all my life, made me hate the stuff

Canada. You?

Incel alert

>tfw a girl likes you

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fuck you alcohol and drugs destroyed my family and I refuse to ever touch them or be around them

mazionga

>You need to drink to make friends and indulge in bad habits.
Not him but im good thanks.
I don't want to be around people who need to drink to relax and have a good time. Everyone seems push the stuff onto you because they become self-conscious around sobriety.

now tell me exactly what he said that was wrong here

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I tend to get compared to the arab character. Apparently he's some sort of cynic.

Sell all your belongings. Move to a poor tropic Island. Live on the beach. Be happy.

He's a volcel, brainlet.

>implying I know that feel

Why the fuck would you not tell your employer you had an exam that you need to study for, are you a special type of autistic retard.
Would you rather work and get extra pay only to have to retake a subject which will be 10x as much as the pay for the work you did.

Ireland. I used to know someone who moved to Canada, she was cute.

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It's fine to a beer or whatever but I agree to avoid anyone that says that they need alcohol to have fun

Based.

You responding to me shows you have enough hope for it to change. You're holding a conversation now, and there are girls out there who feel the same way you do. Holding a hand isn't the hard part, holding onto a good one for life is. You decide your own life, user, just know that there are girls out there who will look past your flaws if you look past theirs. People choose to go to the grave alone. It's better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all. Just give it a shot, user. Believe in the me that believes in you

I was afraid you’d say that... I need to switch to comp sci ASAP then...

Please Ill let you read all my manga if you dont crinkle the pages

>girl likes you
>don't realize it until after the fact

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>attractive
>friends actually think I have sex
>I can never say anything right around girls so I just stopped talking to ones that aren't family or friend
This is a special kind of hell. I have the tools, supposedly, but I don't know what to do.

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>you're a smart guy
>you're a good looking guy
No matter how many times you tell them you know you're not either of those things they just don't stop. I guess they think I'll kill myself, maybe they're right.

>tfw the last time you talked to a girl your age was a year ago and she pulled the 'ol "my BF is in the army" card on you

Are you cute tho? Ill listen to all your problems even if you arent

Titty baby.
Titty baby.

>complains about big bang theory
>posts the big bang theory of anime

Lol a chick dating an army guy is the biggest whore going.

>parents keep asking if i have a bf yet

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This

>get a girlfriend
>nobody fucking cares now
or
>they constantly harass you like youre a 14 year old girl feeling puppy love for the popular boy
fuck off you goddamn leeches i just wanna play vidya with my gf and cuddle

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i met my gf a few months ago and she is insanely into me for whatever reason even though I've been coldly rejected by girls who are way less attractive than her. it honestly feels surreal having a girl act this way towards me. she even jokingly hid a middle school style notebook paper love note in my dresser after she stayed this past weekend for V-day, and took me out for a steak dinner and a hockey game for my birthday a few weeks ago.

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Why did you think telling them you're gay was a good idea?

I think she was insinuating that he could beat me up for trying to ask her out

The way you sound, you wouldn’t have made any in orientation either

L O N D O N
O
N
D
O
N

>in group call
>one of my friends calls me the Starscream of the group
>know about Transformers but haven't dug into any specific installment so I look him up
>our personalities are almost directly the same

Oh boy

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all this vague advice doesn't make me less autistic or like women in general any more
I'm not going to compromise on anything for someone's attention and I'm not going to pretend to like things or force myself to be uncomfortable for it either
the only reason I even leave my house anymore is to play one video game with a handful of people I don't even like or talk to willingly outside of discussing the game itself

Do you even want one?

>too old to go back to college and have the college experience(tm)
>ywn never have a fun fling with the cutie in your art class
>everyone around you is looking for serious relationships while you've never had your first kiss

It gets so, so much worse every year

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>if i'm gay then why don't i have a boyfriend either?
checkmate

I mean you can always just buy a dead pig, put it in the drivers seat and park your car in front of some train tracks or something

I'll pass, all my problems would be too boring for you to read and too boring for me to write out.

>fat fuck in high school, not used to girls giving me attention
>meet girl in computer lab one day
>short thick brunette, very cute and bubbly
>talking about conspiracy theories
>hang out with her once or twice
>she wants to wear my hat
>she makes me put it on her head and put her ponytail though the hat hole
>totally into this girl but know she has a bf so don't attempt anything
>friends call me a retard for not making an advance
>meet her boyfriend at graduation, he's a manlet
>seeing her bf depresses me
>ghost her
>a few weeks later she breaks up with her bf
>she messages me on facebook months later asking why we don't talk anymore, why did i remove her etc
>add her back and try to hang out but she backs out of plans at the last minute
literally the only girl that has ever given me attention
haven't spoken to her in years
i fucked up bad

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I love you

Intelligent, nihilistic and with a wicked sense of betrayal?

What kind of friend calls another treacherous coward?

shes gonna murder you if you ever cheat on her
watch out m8

tfw what keeps me going is that there's people that have it much worse than me and they're still trying
and the fact that I'm not Anthony Burch

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t-thanks

That or he's rich/promised her marriage.

>parents watching tinfoil hat retard shit on youtube for 3 days straight
>tell them its literal mind poison
>waaaah stop ruining everything
fuck sakes

she's trying to keep you as an orbiter/backup plan. do not engage. you don't have to be a dick but don't start conversations with her, and simply politely entertain her to the bare minimum if she comes to you. absolutely do not hang out with her, she knows what she is doing and that is being manipulative. don't let her manipulate you. talk to other girls.

>and the fact that I'm not Anthony Burch
DELETE THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

so.... you're saying it's the best of both worlds?

She probably wanted to fuck

m8 even if I wanted to cheat on a girlfriend I wouldn't even be able to.

:O

No. 3d pig are disgusting

i haven't spoken to her in YEARS. it's not an issue anymore.

>only girl i've ever really liked was an e-girl that was a carbon copy of Lord Dominator
>shat on everything and everyone all the time with her
>stopped talking to her after she bailed on her boyfriend, who i was also friends with, during his birthday to go fuck her ex

Even though she was a piece of shit I still miss her

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Based
Fuck 3dpd

FUCKING JANNIE BITCH

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>ghost her
smart move considering she was already taken
>add her back and try to hang out but she backs out of plans at the last minute
her fault only, you did what you could

The only thing I don't have in common with him is the betrayer part and the coward part, everything else is 1:1

Welcome, everyone *dabs on you*

>Yea Forums
FUCK YOU JANNIES

BAZINGA

It would've been better to have been deleted. such an ignoble end to a nice thread

If you hate janitors so much, why aren’t you applying to be one?

good. fuck girls like that. I used to be a orbiting simp when I was young because my boomer parents raised me that way. there needs to be more support for young men to learn about this stuff, I wasted a good year or two of my life being a oneitis infested orbiter to some manipulative bitch.

Fucking finally this shit is out of Yea Forums 2.0. Thanks mods.

They are right, though. You are exactly like Sheldon.

I am at peace, now. I'm probably never going to be in a relationship. I've come to the age where most women are with long term boyfriends or looking for "the one", and I understand that I am not a suitable mate. And that's OK. Not everyone gets to live that lifestyle, and if anything, I'm glad I can have a unique perspective on life by being single. It will never not be sad, knowing I'll never be on a girl's thoughts. A girl will never be excited to see me, never look into my eyes and smile. I'll never buy a girl flowers on Valentines day or open gifts with my kids on Christmas. The pain will always be there, but I can live with it.

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>Putting autists on a red board somehow stops them getting even more autistic...

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>tfw my own ex-wife told me this

Worries of a 12 year old.

haha. no

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>3 years ago
>manage to get a girlfriend
>just one week before 1 year anniversary she breaks up with me
>present
>she became a lesbian

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I can't afford myself to work for free

same tbqh

Thank you mods!

> he's watched enough bbt to have opinions on characters or, moreover, know the names of anyone but Sheldon

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Apparently you're ugly and brown

Haha
>fail

>be ugly NEET male
>couldn't get a date to save my life
>transition
>still pretty ugly but whatever
>gotten more tinder matches in one night than ever as a guy
>tons of sex, threesomes, lesbians hitting on me
>in first real relationship, happy as could be

you're missing out

Who is silverman!?

>me

By "you're" you mean the general population or just the Germans?

this thread you poopy butt

pretty, pretty autistic

im a nerd and you sir are far off!

>faggots
so they still can get a special someone unlike you?

MODS=FAGS

>having a retarded offspring

MODS=GODS

>think this thread was moved from r9k
>it was fucking Yea Forums
wut

Yes

My ex turned gay after we broke up. Still cracks me up

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She was sent from the future to pacify you and prevent you from becoming the next hitler

Same here. My parents are absolute fucking assholes. Edgy teenager I hear you say? I’m 52.

wat...
WAT?!

Honk Honk

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I was diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia a decade ago. It's actually taken a 180 turn and I almost feel completely normal.

They say it tones down at the age of 26. I had one of the worst cases and it's almost completely gone away @ 28 (diagnosed at 19)

it's been hell and no one would blame you for taking the easy way out, but it does get easier.