I can't wait to have edgy, retarded children with CTS-kun~

In wish I could say the same.

No offense but most of your pain is imagined or forced. You need to actually be in pain to realize you want to be happy and feel good. You're just getting off on feeling sorry and lonely.

Get better.

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Why do you think I'm so funny?

Pain.

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You're 18 and have never been in a relationship, how much pain have you realistically endured?

It was my birthday 3 days ago.

I haven't celebrated a birthday since I was 17

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I haven't celebrated a birthday since I was 12

when you're at my age a birthday is generally only thrown for you by friends, except my friends are junkies and freaks much like me so I can't expect much

I haven't since I was like 13 or so. And you don't have to be in a relationship to feel pain. Loneliness can do just as much. All I ever wanted was someone to love and rely on.

That's your problem. You want someone just so you don't feel lonely. It's selfish and it's why nobody wants to be with you.

It's a mutual thing. Stop looking for someone to fix you. Fix yourself.

Don't you think i would've done that already if I knew how?

do NOT impregnate the CTS

Not really, you seem to enjoy feeling sorry for yourself despite saying other wise.

I apologize if you think I'm being mean to you, but consider I actually like you which is why I'm giving myself carte blanche to say what I will.

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I already knocked up his brain.

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It's true that I often try to make people feel pity towards me but that's just so I can get them to talk to me and (hopefully) get them to love me. And I don't see that as being selfish. I want their love and in exchange I love them just as much maybe even more and try to be as reliable as possible.

That may work but that is not a basis to begin a relationship. In fact I find it rather a roundabout way to like blackmail into people liking you. You did it to me.

You're setting yourself up for failure by doing this because you're painting yourself into a corner. Do you know why CTS likes me and not you? Because I make him laugh, I don't cry and complain when he goes to play vidya or doesn't talk to me constantly.

Nobody likes needy.

So now hopefully you realize relationships are a mutual thing, and generally they form when you like somebody and that's all.

Go in with ulterior motives and watch it crumble.

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He told me.. He told me that I also made him laugh and smile all the time. He did. I don't have my account anymore to show you proof but I know he did say that. I wasn't being very needy with him. I understood that he wanted his free time and I usually almost never messaged him until he did. And yea maybe I was annoying him when I told him to get a job and work out but I did that because I cared and I didn't want him to regret that later on in life. I really did care. And I still do.

Then you ruined it.

I know.

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>Nobody likes needy.
Some people love needy/clingy/obsessive/yandere types and while his way of meeting someone may not be ideal (as you said) it could theoretically work if a compatible person bumps into him and genuine feelings develop on both sides or sometin.

I don't feel bad because CTS deserves me.

He was actually surprised I wanted to call him because apparently he's just used to guys saying "I love you" just to get pics out of him. I think he was thrown off by someone who genuinely likes him for more than some sultry pictures.

Now he calls me an alpha and I make him cum every night lol

That's true but it's tricky, and I'm not very motherly so me and Vlad didn't click.

I'm sure years ago I'd find the yandere type endearing, but now that I'm an adult and have a few scars I just see a burden.

Haha... That's really funny.
When I wanted to voice chat with him he told me he didn't have a microphone and his parents were around. I told him that I don't want him for sex and pictures of him. I wanted to hug and cuddle with him. I even told him to stop posting pictures of himself naked online. This is all very funny. But all and all I'm happy that he's okay now because I felt really guilty about what I did and how I made him feel.

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I guess I'm growing up.

I want an equal. I may be a dom but I don't want a "lesser"

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Internet relationships are bad news anyway. For years I've said it, I didn't even use discord until like 6 months ago.

He is worth a shot to me.

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Hope it all goes well.
Thank you for talking to me. It made me feel a bit better.

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You'll be alright.
Don't think you're the only one who has gone through this shit or dealt with the pain of unrequited love.
You will be ok.

Cardi b music tears my ears