I had a dream

I have a planet fitness shirt because I'm VERY ironic

dubs neat

man theres juts too much dog to hug

youtu.be/pzGimN2H2oQ

Your fortune: Average Luck

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11,5 kg

xd my fbi agent is such a sweetheart

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40% off too xd

my agent never calls
they are too shy to make contact

aww ever tried to leave some cookies and milk 4 them?

i tried to use keyword to buzz their surveillance system to notice but i think they are just playing hard to get
*sigh* maybe i should just become a criminal, that way they would have to notice me right? but then again with life of crime comes responsibility and commitment and i'm not too keen on that, imagine having to spend years in jail and only seeing your agent on interrogation visits on your past cases, what a bore
"where did you bury the bodies" "who did you work with" blaa blaa, why talk about the old when you can talk about other things "hey how you've been, well apart from being anally violated in the showers and shanked in the cafeteria things have been nice, i read half a book today, someone tore off the rest of the book so i have to wait until bob returns his book to the library"

god damn my asshole is tight

not surprising, look at all the mass around it

oh please I get enough fat jokes from the faggot

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which one GIMME NAMES

kids and their vr problems nigga i just want a multiplayer choice of game that doesnt suffer from mass effect effect

ugh just made a floater wtf thats not good had to use a trick to flush it down

ive made a fool of myself so many times that ill only be a fully respectable person after most of my family dies
no wait some of them will outlive me wont they
oh well time to move planets

btw if you think about it alcohol is a great thing if you wanna solve your bullshit problems
obv if youre in debt or jobless or recently widowed it wont help you one bit
by bullshit problems i mean those that are in your head the ones you made a tumblr blog about
like for example you messed up a handshake once back in 1983 and you cant sleep at night because of it
try going to a club while already blackout drunk
youll mess up some but who cares you dont know those people do you
plus you dont even remember a thing
suddenly that handshake wasnt even in this life

eww

dubs nice nice wall of text also what are you stephen king

unsubbed

>cant buy beer until 8:30

stupid arbitrary laws

SHUT UP NIGGERFISH AND DIE IDIOT FUCKING NIGGERS

Oh hi mark

archive.4plebs.org/s4s/thread/7203037/#7225110 my bf read it

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*slowly backs away*

>archive.4plebs.org/s4s/thread/7203037/#7225110
excuse me sir but what is this load of garbaggio

just got my flu shot (coudnt get it earlier cause sick all the time) wen do i get the autisomo

so my aunt visited and i was eating dinner (shes vegetarian now apparently rip holy fuk) and she looks at my dog and shes like you are going to give him some real meat on a SUNDAY right
and im like hes not religious
and shes like
HOW DO YOU KNOW???

dr mike is an elbow sneezer
my fucking man

dubs checkem

fuggin captcha is2g

correct me if im wronj but popmundo doesnt have a character creator anymore :^(

83.popmundo.com/World/Popmundo.aspx/Artist
anyways any1 wanna join me band

bump

youtube.com/watch?v=F_sFafClcUk

SO COME ON PRETTY BABY
SUCK MY BALLS ALL NIGHT
THE DRIVER SAYS WE'RE LEAVING
COME MORNING LIGHT
SPIT OUT THAT RETAINER AND DO ME RIGHT
OOOH, COME ON PRETTY BABY, SUCK MY BALLS ALL NIGHT

nipplel

holographic chase cards

First thought:
fucking, daughter
Second thought:
sucking, dog

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i wanna play scribblio with sandra bullock and nicole kidman one day

My money's on Kidman

doesnt matter my goal is to feed them sandwiches when they dont expect it

just ate my red pen pls spank me HARD

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i cant work without it right RIGHT

youtube.com/watch?v=H9uXm0-tZ1g&list=RDUw1sivwNE7g&index=5

cat fookin wait till summer when my coworkers r gona moshhhhhhhhhhhhh oto horrible horrible moosic n i get to shyate a room n judge them with my bestie

its all incusive too so brace for them whiskey shitposts fam

hahe

eating pizza

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my hero

hehehe

lokl

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h t t p s ://d i s c o r d .gg/ERvRaw

blacked out big time it seems wtf

thats no way to start a week you know it

why am i like this

goddammit literally cant remember shit what am i twelve

cant identify what i ate and i went to sleep in my day clothes which never happens no matter how drunk i am holy shit are my lenses out or not i cant tell

they are
stay hecking hydrated

its not that late how come there arent any normal people left

i should have a dora the explora/ blues clues show in which id just deduce things from the night before with a lil help from my audience

it would air at like 10 am when respectable people are at work and its just stoners and gibsmen in front of the tv

wew la

what did i eat and why
the fuck is with my right knee
why did my feiend just call me banana princess
did fatfish post ass
we may never kno