What happened to stunt his emotional growth and make him a permanent manchild?

>wall of funko pops behind him
>handmade WWF ice cream bar with him on it
>Paper plate for kids birthday parties
>says "Birthday Boy"

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People with arrested development have often been abused before, sexually. Gargano may have literally been raped.

Why are you guys shocked?
The normies of today want nothing more but to be kids again. Star Wars? Superhero films? Disney reboots? Funko pops? Comics?

That's just how it was. The moment that people saw money in "nerd" culture, was when most of these hobbies lost its soul. ow it's just a, "never grow up" simulator.

>They're called (you)s
unironically a bigger geek than Johnny could ever be

Absolutely embarrassing

Why yes, I do believe this is a case of jealousy on you part, dear OP. You see, Johnny Gargano has reached the philosophical idea of the "Ubermensch".
He has killed kayfabe (GOD) and despite being a man of short stature his elects to pursue professional wrestling, the sport of giants.
Gargano rejects the popular premise that assumes one must be above 6ft in order to be a good wrestler.
And he does this while maintaining a calm, cool and collected demeanor. It truly is a sight to behold.

As Friedrich Nietzsche himself put it:
“Man's maturity: to have regained the seriousness that he had as a child at play.”
Gargano personifies this idea.

As one observes Jonathan Garganowitz, they see a man who is physically fit and has love in his life.
He is successful in his endeavours and is strong in spirit. It should be noted, that often times, his detractors do not possess the aforementioned qualities.

It is for this reason, OP, that I must disavow your entire thread. A gentleman and a scholar like myself, can not endorse a post so factually incorrect in nature.

Good Day.

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OH NO NO NO NO NO

He was fat when he was a kid. He lost the weight but he still has that fat attitude.

100% that Candice is taking dick on the side.

>32 years old
>Married
>No children

That's a Yikes from me dawg. This generation is so fucked.

I wish I had a loving wife

Sucked a few cocks today bros. No homo.

sounds to me that OP is jealous his wife doesn’t make him custom ice cream bars

>Cleveland shirt
Are there really people out there who are proud to be from Ohio? I know Sami Callihan does it, but I always assumed it was just part of the gimmick.

>having kids
uh-oh, retard alert!

During the blazing summer of 92?

>Yeah goy, do not perpetuate your genes. Buy some funkos! That is the best thing in life!

never thought I would unironically hate a wrestler

I know he looks like a fucking dork and that we do this mostly to make fun of him but i'm gonna try to be serious for a minute

Really shitty parenting or childhood trauma/abuse. He was fat af as kid and probably got bullied a lot therefore he had a difficult childhood, now as an adult he unconsciously wants to revisit that part of his life and make it better.

Like i said it all comes to something that happened during his childhood (obviously), maybe he grew up poor and his parents couldn't afford to buy him those super cool toys and doing it now that he is an adult is his way to cope? Maybe an absent dad? As someone who was raised by a single mom let me tell you that women are pretty bad at rising men, they're way too fucking sentimental to rise real men which wheter you like it or not is something that has to be done by a man.

Whatever the case might be, i think it should be taken seriously and be treated as a psychological disorder affecting millions of men worldwide that requires psiquiatric therapy. It should even get it's own name, maybe "The Michael Jackson Syndrome"?

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>everything is jewish propaganda
paranoia

>real men
>as definied by an user on the fake fighting section of a Mongolian hentai trading imageboard
o i am laffin

>reddit opinion
>doesn't want kids
Cringe

I think part of the problem is that his wife treats him like a kid instead of a husband, she probably has a sick fetish about this shit.

he's white. it's in his blood to be pathetic.

>everything is reddit
>then proceeds to use a surrogate downvote
go pay your child support

Bruh this nigga still gettin laid lmao
Go hotglue a funko pop

you probably owe in the thousands by now, Tyrone. You should probably get to paying it.

He was already that way when she met him so i don't think it's her fault. If anything she's part of the problem but not the one to blame for the problem itself. She seems like a cool wife tho, she met him that way and she's not trying to change him and does those things because she sees how happy he is with his childish hobbies. Johnny R*ddit is a grown man and if he wants change (which he doesn't it seems) it's all up to him.

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Just leave already no one likes you here and you aren't funny.

VINCE

STRAP
NOW

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My son brings more joy, meaning and love into my life than any childish bullshit I could buy myself in a desperate attempt to regress to my childhood.

Nothing in the world can compare to the feeling of being a parent. But why am I wasting my time talking to someone who has never even felt the touch of a woman who loves him, much less had to actually think about the decision to bring another life into this world.

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A good wife/partner would still push you to be a better person though. Letting him stay in this weird/pathetic fantasy world is just kind of sad. I mean if they love each other I'm very happy for them both but I'm sure they would both be genuinely more fulfilled if he could mature and become a real man.

Your wife is probably bored of you and having secret conversations with an old fling behind your back. It's only a matter of time before she divorce rapes you and leaves with your child.

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he gets to fuck a 10/10 woman,hes winning in life

My wife and I just had the day off work together started out with a lovely brunch at a local breakfast place where we did a little chatting about our vacation plans and some ideas we both have to work on the house.

Then we went to go see a movie together and then went home and I fucked her in the ass before we went to go pick up our son from daycare. We're in love and happy and if we ever did get divorced it would be amicable and civilized and I'd end up getting paid alimony since I make less than her.

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The fact you immediately got defensive about it proves him right.

werked

it could also explain dating a woman as old as his mom.

tl;dr

his wife is older than him? damn, isn't he like 32? there goes any hope for johnny to have healthy children...