/lift/ - Shoplifting General

Tips tricks and stories

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I knew you all were a bunch of ding-dong diddly bulbasaurs

necrobump

Didn’t realize lifting was an alt sport. I think I did it once in my entire life. Stole a t-shirt by hiding it in the pocket of a pair of JNCO jeans. YEP

a couple of burnouts at the trap house I used to hang around made a competition of it, seeing who could get away with the most stuff from the gas station. One finally got caught stuffing 4 12 packs of hamburger buns into his jacket. We didn’t even have anything to put in the buns.

niggers

I walk in store with bag then fill with stuff and just walk out.

Shoplifting is so easy

Any anons here work loss prevention

Seething

Back when I worked in a grocery store meat department I used to take handfuls of shrimp from the seafood case and hide em in my pockets

Yikes

Did u get arrested?

Really nice of them to give a job to someone with special needs

These poo in loos got caught stealing at my work. Undercover detained them but police never showed up oh no no no no no

YOU FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT FUCK YOU!

Whats ya fucking problem?

t. Target manager

NIGER SCUUUUM LIKE YOU ARE RUINING OUR SOCIETY!

mmmmm...shoplifting... that's a serious offence... see you at wrestler's court

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I only steal from da big companies like Walmart and Zellers

BASED

If you steal food most of time emplorees dont care but if you go fro electronics then thats when shit oea down

Crinfe and bluepilled

>Our society
>Lives in a trailer

>Zellers
BASED

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None of you are smart enough to steal

Is it true stores have ultra high tech facial scanning recognition software.

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Ya it's like Bourne Identity don't even try it ya gonna get ding-dong diddly lock up

I always wanted to rob a Toys r us

Why so ya could steal funko pop ya weeb

YOU'RE THE REASON WE DON'T HAVE $20 MINIMUM WAGE!

Yikes

Kek

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Im ding-dong diddly wait till it gets dark then go steal sone skittlea from dollar store ohhh yah ding-dong diddly

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ummmmm no sweatie. its because of trump and the other capitalist pigs

Crime of the century

For legos and weebs don't collect Funko pops dumbfuck

I hope Zimmerman kills you.

How do stores with no security catch shopliftsrs

Jesus christ wats with the hostility honkey

What items did you take the most? Meat?

Lads what candy is easiest to steal. I spent my last $10 on WWE network sub

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I would steal more often but i have autism and think every person is under cover security

Pretty much everything senpai. I still use all the high end wine stuff I took

Based

Ok lads im gonna try it and will post my results here, if i dont post it means i got arrested.

There's nothing stopping you from going to self serve during a busy period and not scanning some expensive items.

Back in Christmas of '04 my buddy and I stole a Kill Em All copy from Best Buy. This was during my Metallica phase that every angsty teenager has. It was packed af so no one stopped us when the alarm things went off. Many years later I bought a 60 dollar phone card the but the girl scanned it wrong or something so it wouldnt work and those do not have refunds. So they got their money back. The Lord does not forget lads. He will avenge Himself sevenfold.

I do dat erryday

My store has self serve attendant that has monitor over all the self checkouts to make sure everything is scanned...

>be me
>be five
>go to hobby lobby with mommy
>look around in a isle
>shes paying attention to some fake flower shit
>i see this pencil
>sort of like pic related
>stick in pocket
>leave with mommy and go home
>happy i got my pencil
>but i start to feel bad about taking something that wasnt mine
>fastfoward 20 years
>i still feel bad about
why the fuck do i feel bad about stealing a fucking 99 cent pencil like 20 years ago.

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based morals working the smarks

You're one of the good ones

It's okay, Hobby Lobby stole Babylonian artifacts

Yikes

I used to just pick up what I wanted and walk out the front with it in plain view in my hands, straight passed the security guard. They wouldn't look twice as they'd just assume you had paid.

Another one we used to do was

>go into Big W
>get a pick and mix bag
>fill it with whatever items you like
>twist the top so the contents aren't visible
>go and pay for it
>cashier would never have reason to open or look into the bag
>the price is based on the weight of the (Supposedly) sweets in the bag
>get expensive items for the price of their weight