Enjoying a relaxing gaming session

>enjoying a relaxing gaming session
>suddenly remember an embarrassing thing I did 5 years ago

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Well go on then, user, tell us what you did

My whole life is an embarrassing thing I'm doing right now

spill the beans so we can laugh

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I shat in the urinal

Same, I remembered all the bad things I did to my classmates and friends that made me lose motivation to play today.

Nagatoro

Why the fuck did you shit in the urinal?

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What's so embarrassing about that?

I used to get very touchy-feely with one of my shy coworkers
He was older than me by like three years

But that's based and not embarrassing at all

I said 'america BEEP yeah' when I was a little kid (technically more than 5 years ago). Not even an onomonopia- I said the word 'beep' out loud.

Fucking Nagaretard, that's it? I peed in my friend's fucking fridge when I was drunk. I told my friend it was lemonade that spilled when we woke up.

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I jerked off next to one of my sister's friends when she was sleeping during a sleepover.
To this day I'm not sure if she noticed or not.

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Why are you embarassed about being a gigachad?

Why are you gay?

Niggertoro

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used to jerk off with my friend to hentai

That's not that bad, relatively

Ah, an ERP thread.

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Nothing gay about helping your coworker relieve stress during a bad deployment, user.

A little embarrassment builds character, you've gotten up to this point didn't you?

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even though im 31 sometimes i remember some of the truly degenerate things 13~ year old me did
i was the worst, wish i could go back in time and beat the shit out of my self

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When I was like 9, my mom would sometimes sleep with me when I had a nervous breakdown. I remember waiting till she fell asleep, then quietly jerking off next to her and cumming in my underwear. I don't know why I did that, she was never hot or anything.

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I hate this crap. Whenever I'm trying to read something I remember something dumb I did as a kid and tense up like mad.

Fuck no im not looking to ERP i regret it every night i go to bed

Oh fuck you just reminded me again

>6th grade
>join Lacrosse team
>actually kinda good
>ultra hot 10th grade JV girl is like assigned to watch us on the bus to games
>I usually try to sleep on the bus
>comes up to me and asks if I want a gummy worm
>holds it in her fingers, dangling down
>spaghetti.gif
>rather than take it like a normal person, bite it out of her hands with my mouth like a dog
>go back to sleep

Luckily she's cool as shit and still hung out with me but even typing this out I want to set myself on fire.

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If it makes you feel better, try to remember an embarrasing thing a friend or family member did 5 years ago. I am guessing you can't because it was so insignificant and long ago. Now realize its the same situation for you.

12 year old me knows the taste of his best friend's feet.
Said best friend didn't know I knew the taste of his feet.

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I know that feel
>be playing timesplitters, jerk off to horror level chick
>both of us are jerking ourselves off
>I cum and post-nut clarity hits
>immediate shame of having jerked off with another boy jerking off in the same room

i remember a kid in middle school wipe his shit over the bathroom wall and left his underwear in the urinal

>first time going to a friends house
>he's kind of weird but whatever so am i
>go to his room in his mom's shitty apartment
>he immediately puts on porn and just sits there and watches it
>after a couple mins ask him if he wants to uhhh play video games or something
>he says sure and throws on shadow of the colossus since i had been wanting to see it in person

>senior year of high school
>no friends
>want to do something memorable
>try to think of something deviant but ultimately socially acceptable
>"I'll shit in the urinal"
>Eat a lot of fiber that morning to try to make the process quick
>lunch period
>no one is in the bathroom, win
>pull down pants and start at my task
>taking longer than expected
>the fiber is pushing things along nicely, but my asshole hairs are in the way
>didn't consider this
>suddenly, footsteps
>the log is half way out of my asshole, pull up pants anyway, turn around and try to make it look like I was pissing
>it's the fucking principal
>at a (very) small town school.
>he's a family friend
>"Hello user, how's school been treating ya?" he asks me, trying to force out urine with a half deployed log of shit in my pants
>just give him a silent, pained grin
>he washes his face and enters the stall
>take my oppurtunity
>let out a mighty "HRRRRNG!" and force out the (huge) shit, which lands with a "PLOP"
>flee and pray he doesn't notice
>5 years later
>he still hasn't made eye contact with me at any of our family gatherings since then

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>tfw lay awake at night remembering the times girls in my highschool classes actually dropped hints at me
Sometimes I watch those anime about a really dense harem MC and call it unrealistic but don't realize that I was actually that guy.

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I didn't know I was supposed to wash my ass until around the age of 15.
No one ever said anything, maybe I had a protective layer built up or something

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I was house sitting with my mom when I was young and I stole some of the girl who lived there's underwear and wore it in the bathroom while jerking off looking at myself in the mirror and my drunk mother walked in on me and then left without saying a word

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Do you think it's FUNNY to take a deuce in the urinal, m'kay?

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the idea of sitting and watching porn like a movie is alien
some people do it though i guess
makes no sense

>First day of 6th grade
>Homeschooled 5th
>Missed kids aging rapidly mentally somewhat
>Sit down in first class of the day
>Teacher says to introduce yourself to your neighbor
>Do the Hamtaro "Heke" as response to her hello
>She treated me like a tard for the rest of the year

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My ex brought over Bible Black to watch and make fun of and we ended up not only marathoning it that night but torrenting the sequel, prequel and game and finishing all of it over the weekend.

That shit has no business being as interesting as it actually is.

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>be in a tf2 all-talk lobby
>have a casual talk with people
>i suddenly accidentally moan pretty loudly in voice chat
>no one says anything for a little bit
>i get added by a few people from the lobby
>they want to erp
and it's as easy as that folks

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I'm in my 40s and happily married with kids but sometimes I still get really embarrassed and feel like a retard when I think about how much of certain moments from when I was a teenager. Guess it never goes away

The funny part is this is the most videogame post in the thread.

i have these thoughts all day every day, I'm autistic af and embarrassed myself dozens of times throughout my life

>be me
>I was gonna fight some random retard in 5th grade
>he start beating the shit out of me
>sperg mode initiates and start screaming like fucking goku when turning into a SS for the first time
>get stopped by older kids
>be called Super Sayain for the rest of school
it do be like that sometimes.

>go to japan with jap friend at 13 as a turbo autist weeb in 2002 for a couple weeks
>he has a 13 year old japanese cousin who lives next door
>i write her a note in horribly poor japanese translated english that included "aishiteru" on the day i left (i interacted with her like twice where she called me fat)
>also left her my unwashed hat
>this was on their family doorstep
almost 20 years later and it still makes me put my face in my hands

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You jacked off at age 9?

why would you moan accidently
post vocaroo
I moan really fucking girly when I have the opportunity and I wonder if anons would like it but I'm just too intimidated by male voices to actually go all the way with that

My girlfriend started masturbating at 6 by sitting on the clothes dryer. 9 really isnt that weird.

not him but I might have been jerking off even earlier than that
there was a long time where I cummed before I could even make semen

many such cases when you get touched by your uncle as a kid. or maybe just a zoomer.

You deserve the shame for broke poor nipperinas hearts user

I hope this is true

more like swimming by a jet in the pool and realizing having the water hit your shota penis feels absolutely incredible
it took a long time before I realized I could replicate that feeling with my hands

i think i nutted when i was 9 as well. grandparents had a lewd postcard from hawaii under their bed. my pp moved so i was like pp what you doin and then it felt good so i rubbed the top of my jeans until big feel good came.
this also is what caused me to not understand how to masturbate and i "jerked off" this way until i was 13

>why would you moan accidently
so that i can trick people into erping with me
vocaroo.com/1ag2pP1hVxof
if only you could hear me when i'm edging

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Reminder

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ummm, hello add me?? tag??
that's actually similar to what I sound like

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nice

>vocaroo.com/1ag2pP1hVxof

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What stops you from coming to terms with it?

i know this is going to sound weird, but i don't even have a discord. if this thread doesn't get deleted i might have the time to make one just for you bby

>its a gay thread
fuck you guys my most embarrassing moment has to be back in 7th grade i used to recreate moves from god hand and 1 time i knocked out a chick i liked

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I held up a heavy boulder above a kid's head while my friend restrained him because I was annoyed at the little shit harrasing him.
Nothing happened, but I still shudder at that memory.

At least you learned your lesson that fiction doesn't IRL and didn't end up like those retarded redditors that traveled to Ukraine to get killed by russians because they thought it would just be like their Avengers movies

friend please just tell me how to contact you because good lord

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I will never not get upset at guro

in my first ever real fight i taunted him by doing the pennywise dance then he ran over and choked me out until i fell unconscious

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>real girls will never post vocaroos in this thread
sad

>Freshman highschool
>Walking home with girl I used to hang out with
>At some point as we were walking she wanted me to come to her house since "nobody was home"
>"Ah no sorry can't do that new game (kid Icarus uprising) just came out and wants to pass by game stop sorry maybe another day"
>Went home to play 3ds kino
I sort of repress the memory by the fact that uprising is one of my favorite games, on the bright side we were still friends after

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chad

Reading that I thought preemptively "I would bite it out of her hand". Sure enough, that's what you did.
I'm a chad. If you had the same reaction as me, you are one too.

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If you wait long enough, every thread on Yea Forums becomes a gay thread. All it takes is one homosexual.

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Same, but someone walked in on me and I had to waddle to the stall to wipe
Same but he was like 40 something
Same but to horror flicks
Same but it was my friend's (who was fat) parent's (who were fat) swamp hut next to the lake during family nudity day
Same but I kept it up the whole year
Same but age 8

games before bitches, bro
you did the chaddest move

I hope this actually happened

yeah you're a dumbass this is cool guy behavior and she wanted you to do that

I've seen this happen repeatedly ever since the days of IRC
If you don't tell the literal faggots to fuck off it will become a gay chat

>Do the Hamtaro "Heke" as response to her hello
What?

ok i did it, i set up a discord account Illuminee#8660

i can assure you it did

Teenage girls are hornier than you can imagine. I had a couple relationships in high school and the girls were always the first to initiate the sex stuff. I have a lot of moments where I could have fucked girls in high school but was too stupid to understand what was really happening

Hamtaro leans his head to the side and said "Heke"

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In my teenage years I was NEVER the one to initiate, it was always the girls. I've actually never made the first move and have been with like 5 girls. 3 of them were in teenage years

>something embarassing/uncomfortable happens
>whisper "ざわ‥" to myself out loud

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I used to lick the feet of all the girls that slept over my house when I was a kid
whether they were or awake or not I did it
I still think about it to this day so fucking weird

I hate all of you so much
why am I a fucking 24 year old handholdless virgin

i piss down a slide at a public park