100 anons are suddenly transported to Toad Town

I'm just gonna move to Koopa Village and chill with this guy

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All you'd have to do is hold him down and tear his eggshell off. The real problem is the Shy Guy army.

>50 user sit down and achieve nothing
>30 anons simp for the first female toad
>10 anons die to the first enemy
>Of the remaining anons 2 get lost and never found 5 die through combat and 3 make it to the end of the game.
>1 dies to Bowser
>1 rapes Peach while reciting fucking McRide songs.
>and the last one slutsquats for Bowsers big bara cock.
So no, they couldn't.

local boo population terrified out of woods by coomer squad after laying waste to toad town
no word from Koopa Village

No, sorry, I don't know about timed hits.

I just hang out with that opera singer because I like her jingle. Also I cum inside Bombette.

most of them would try to have sex with bowser

>implying everyone wouldn't join Bowser's army

Fuck you fags, I’m joining Bowser, who’s with me?

>He doesn't know about timed hits
This pleases the Goomba.

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Serving Bowser seems like one of the worst career choices anyone could ever make

I don't know, you just have to make sure you avoid Mario, and keep yourself safe from townspeople that remember any warcrimes you committed during Bowser's reign once he's inevitably defeated

We get 100 turns collectively, we could theoretically stomp any boss in the game through sheer volume.

If Mario does 1 damage or 2 with his hammer, how much do you think those puny arms are going to do? You're made of paper, too.

We could just grab some tree branches or rocks and club everything to death like cavemen before anything even gets a single turn.

Why wouldn't I join the side with the flying double decker castle?

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>That one Yea Forums Saga where we had multiple threads over the span of days on whether anons would be able to beat Mario 64
>Just anons with no special abilities
>excel sheets were made and mathfags in discussion trying to analyze the optimal Star routes
>One user timed his mile and is able to beat koopa quick
Kino I wish I could experience it again.

But Jumping might work if you consider combined weight, literally this scene, until we find a spikey dude
youtube.com/watch?v=9geMLWusnx0

>One user timed his mile and is able to beat koopa quick
I hope he wasn't doing it on flats, lots of hills to climb on the bob-omb battlefield race.
Were we allowed to bring in aqualungs etc, or any items, or was it just what you had in your home

>that user who tried to tackle forever forest on his own
Boo pussy can drive a man to do stupid things. I can still hear his screams...

Mario is also also made out of paper. An actual person would just pick up Bowser and crumple him up

Original OP for those threads here. I tried making something like that for Sunshine a couple of nights ago, but I fucked up by throwing too many rules at it right out of the gate and it died quickly.
Those threads were some of the most fun I've ever had on Yea Forums.

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Sunshine would be much harder as you have to get through the first 7 shines for each level. Plus lots of breath-holding needing, and even close containment to lava

Yeah, the format makes it tricky. I also had trouble deciding on how to handle FLUDD while also having realistic physics.
>lava
I wish I still had the picture, but someone theorized building a Mr. Blizzard into a suit and using that to tackle Lethal Lava Land. I don't think Sunshine has any snow enemies though.

Have you done one of Banjo Kazooie, it's harder because you need more jiggies but the platforming is mostly easier, except where you need to fly, or double jump

>Paying for food

Here's the plan. We restrain this faglord, tie him up in a cellar and just beat the fucking shit out of him every time we need more food.

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I haven't, but that's an interesting idea. I never beat BK but I could do some research on that.
Sorry OP for hijacking your thread

He's just trying to enjoying the sunshine, Peach, Mario and Bowser can go fuck themselves but I will die to protect Whacka and his smile

At least thirty toadettes are about to be violently impregnated and 70 anons are going to continue being introverted virgins. Bowser wins.

I'd hate to imagine the amount of brain damage he'd suffer from in the time it takes us to beat Bowser.

>Anons create a hybrid army that'll defeat Bowser in 20 years

Items don't scale so all 100 anons would need is time to cook the fire flower + eggs. Then we'd just run through the game grenading our problems.

>no reason to go back to goomba village
>shooting star hill or whatever it's called should be easy but we have to convince the star spirits to lend us their power
>first roadblock might be the fuzzies in koopa village
We're assuming Mario died from the fall at the beginning, right? Is he a factor in our run? Can we visit Luigi?

I kind of have a real important job at the office tomorrow so I really can't, sorry

I hope your boss can accept your excuse of getting sucked into the mushroom kingdom

It's not for my boss, if I finish it in time I'll double my salary

>tfw just imagining an user long jumping, diving and kick jumping to get up hills while yelling YA YA WA YAHOO
kek

are we 3d? 3d beings or objects hold immense power in paper mario

>Were we allowed to bring in aqualungs etc, or any items, or was it just what you had in your home
You could just bring the clothes on your back, but you could build tools (hammers, ladders, etc) and manipulate resources in ways Mario couldn't, like cutting down trees or moving water between levels.

Not OP, but I'd imagine we're paper as well for balancing purposes. Otherwise we could just have the fattest anons sit on Bowser and wrench the star rod out of his hand.

Everything is made out of paper still, if you can make fire you become the King

didn't this actually happen with a multiplayer mod but everyone kept fucking everyone else over so we never got past the basement levels?

But if the fire is also paper...

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my man

We just need one user to make fire and we'll run this town

>anons establish camp right outside of toad town
>organize nightly raids into town to steal stuff while mugging people and threatening them with fire

>I'm gonna go spurge all my money on Li'l Oinks.
what if there's an underground Li'l Oink black market and we smuggle the rare ones out through the Toad Town sewers?

>Attempt to make a primitive camp fire
>the paper is thin and noodly and doesn't produce sparks
>the rocks and metals are also thin noodly paper and this throws into question how the entire world evolved from anything more than stone
How do you metallurgy in a world where metal is like sodium

Yeah with items we should be able to vaporize most of the game even with only a handful of people. It would just take some time to raise the money and some anons would surely get impatient and get killed in the meantime.

Could you not just draw some fire on the paper?

>Yea Forumsidyagaymers become Yea Forumsikings

The next obvious question is whether you can fuck the characters. Given that they are 2D, wouldn't they give your peehole a papercut if you tried to penetrate them? We're going to have 100 men who want some pussy and at least one of them will have to provide bussy before we become bloodthirsty.

im going to roll toce.t up and shove her down my urethra

Considering we probably wouldn't have the star spirits on our side, I'd try my best to get a few people and hightail it over to Goomba Village (or whatever it's called) to take the route Mario did for the most part.

Make that 99 men then

>Given that they are 2D
That's never stopped an user before.

>McRide

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