Play vidya with childhood friend

>transparent pillows

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>be that kid
>tell everyone at school completing majoras mask in one cycle with all the masks lets you become majora

>He doesn't have homemade transparent pillows made with feather's from his imported Transparent birds

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That's exactly what the sign means.
Appears to be some type of aquarium shop.

It’s a double entendre

You are correct, the guy being literal is just retarded.

Otherwise it'd say 'do not stir up my tank' or the like.

Sucked my dick

Or inflated clear balloons. Shit, I don't know. I'm at least thinking here and making suggestions for this retarded fish's health.

I went to sleepover at a rich classmates house when I was a kid and he offered me a bunch of Yu-Gi-Oh cards and video games if I sucked his dick. I said no, but looking back I should have done it for the vidya.

I remember this one time I was playing super smash bros 64 at a friends house and beat him (we were 8). While playing, he had a hamster who was running on a wheel that was making noise. He got so mad, he got his hamster out of it's cage and threw it at the wall full force. Hamster died and I didn't hang out with him anymore.

not mine:
>that retarded furry autist who claimed he was a vampire-werewolf-zombie-ghost hybrid in Primary school, split some kid's head open by ramming his skull into the concrete, moved to the town with the most drug users in the region in High School, and almost had his jaw ripped off (a video literally showed the dude with his hand rammed right inside the autist's mouth) by a roided-up junkie who gave him 300 ausbucks to buy weed and meth for them to share, but bought zoomer clothes and vidya instead.
>that landwhale who fell on the grass in PE and screamed in agony for 30 minutes straight, had to get the ambulance called and was carried off the field on a stretcher, and came to school the next day with a neck brace (never had the neck brace on the day after lmao)
>that same landwhale who came out as transgender in 12th grade
>that brand new /pol/ kid who was hunted down by all the aboriginals and africans on his first day at school because he called them all niggers, only to get expelled 3 weeks later because he got caught fucking a chick with millions of STDs in the bathroom at the nearby shopping centre (both had school uniforms on).
>that autistic kid who loved Sonic and would throw chairs through windows if he got told to stop drawing Sonic or Ben 10 in class
>that teacher from Canada who rode a Harley-Davidson but was a pedo
>that substitute teacher who let everyone fuck around in ICT and warned us not to play WoW because he was addicted to it and played it every day since it first came out
>that kid who crushed up an Ecstasy pill and snorted it right as a teacher walked in front of his desk and somehow never got caught
>that kid who Sieg Heil'd during the ANZAC Day presentation at assembly and got screamed at by a modern history teacher for hours
>that kid who lost his sides in the middle of a presentation from Daniel Morcombe's parents (Ausfags will know), and almost got expelled.
Education in my country is a wild ride

Your country is a wild ride in general. I sometimes wish I was an Australian shitposter.

>used to play Melee a lot
>one time I played as Pichu vs Falco
>friend beats me with his last stock
>yells and rips his shirt off
>runs out the door into the street
>doesn't return
>his parents file a missing persons report

what the fuck that's hilarious

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So he won and just fucked off to nowhere, did they ever find him?

>be me
>m8 and I are playing MK3 on SNES
>brother comes in and asks to join
>my m8 wins and my brother snaps and starts throwing shit and telling him to leave because he's too good at the game and ots unfair
>only found out about the game 30 minutes ago
>realize my brother is retarded.
>friends parents have to pick him up
>we never speak again.
This happened in the year of our lord 2000 when I was 9

>beat little brother at CTR
>he breaks the disc

>invite friend to play RE3
>saves over my save

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what game?

not mine:
>playing game
>another player finds out I'm American
>calls me a fat American pig when I kill him
>tell him to leave the internet cafe and go back to his favela because his tranny "mother" needs help making the sopa de macaco
>he screenshots it and complains to admins that somehow I'm the bad guy

>sleepover at friend house, we are both 12
>play some vidya at 3am
>I need to pee but can't pause the game, after few minutes I get a boner
>my friends notices and starts grabbing and squishing it
>after few minutes we both get naked and do random poses
>later he sucks my dick
>13 years later he's gay and I'm still straight
this proves the theory that there's nothing gay with having your dick sucked by a man

LIGHT UP THE NIGHT

>that high school teacher who had over 3,000 hours in DOTA 2

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I had a friend whose house I would often visit as a 7-8 years old (before me moved to another time and we lost touch). We played vidya a lot and it was comfy most of the time, but the friend had weird attitude towards violent video games. He took them dead seriously to a point that felt just weird. Prime example is Carmageddon. I remember one time when we were playing it while taking turns, and he got seriously angry when me and another friend laughed at how funny and silly it is.
The same friend also once threw a fit in the school when he found out that he and his big brother aren't the only people in the world who know Tomb Raider cheat codes.

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Holy shit I wish that was my teacher.

Shoulda called CPS on his dad for fucking up your night.

These threads used to be good before zoomers started lurking now they are just mostly made up stories

You need to be 18 to post here. Fuck off.

>wish
why

Honestly, one time my friend asked me to bet my girlfriend on a game of Soul Calibur. he won. But he was nice enough to finish up quickly with her.

Not really my friend, but friend's little brother. We were at his place and weren't playing games, we watching a movie. His little brother was playing Counter Strike. There was a power blackout and the little guy went berserk, demanding his dad to "call somewhere" to find out how long it lasts and crying in rage. Me and my friend went outside and could hear his continued autistic screeching all the way there.

Funky Kong wouldn't say that, don't disgrace his name.

>beat my friend at a rts for the first time in over 100 matches after practicing to the point that i had it down to a science
>he proceeds to throw his pc of a second story balcony

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Fuck off Paul, you nonce. Take the nametag off, you look like a right dick.
Also your story is shit and nobody believes it

Me and a buddy hung with this rich kid, he acted like a faggot sometimes, but he had every console on the market, so we let it slide. This one time we played Mario 64, he wanted to play strip punishment game, he always came last, and he was done on his undies, suddenly, that retard started wrestle us, no fucking way man. I was fast and just sneaked away to the bathroom, came back he started to hump my friend. Friend called me to push that faggot away, which I did, and we just picked our shit and left.

My friend told me last year that the guy came out as bisexual on facebook last year.

we had a hardcore muslim guy in class
when some people called each other retard he started laughing and slapped his face
when we asked him why he did this he said you're not supposed to make fun of the disabled

he also always dodged everyone carrying sandwiches because he feared pork

but alcohol was a-ok

I lost all my friends in middle school because they thought I was gay. I don't play multiplayer games locally. My area of the state isn't even small and there's only one Smash local, which costs $15 to enter.
So I play JRPGs alone.

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If goats didn't want to be raped then they should stop being so sexy.

Pretty much all the mutts.

Americans are fucking retards and tap on cages or tanks to get the animal's attention. Anyone who does this needs to be executed.
t. Amerimutt

Nobody's impressed by you denigrating your own people, have a fucking backbone, mate.

Reminds me of when I was stationed in Naples. I met these two smoking hot italian chicks, and we find ourselves at their place. It was a fucking wreck, leaks everywhere, cracks in their cinderblock walls. So I go into the bathroom with one of them and she tries to tell me in broken english to fuck her in the ass. You see they were both religious, and they didnt believe in sex before marriage, so I guess buttfucking didnt count. Meanwhile the other chick was waiting for us to be done (remember religious so threesomes are a nono). While buttfucking the other chick, she said something like I love you in italian.

So yeah other than that the food in Naples was bomb.

Are you autistic? I can 100% say, with many accounts of first hand experience, americans are retarded and most have no decency when dealing with animals. Especially small ones like these. They treat them like toys or decoration.

I think it's funny the self-loathing types don't realize that complete mongs exist everywhere.

He sounds pretty based

I've been to Japan where I'd say the exact same. They treat animals fucking awfully.
I'm pretty sure the middle east are similar. The zoos in Germany aren't exactly fantastic conditions.
Everybody is arguably retarded and has no decency, you'd know that if you left your star-spangled blimp station once in a while.
Stop shitting on your own people, it's fucking gay.

Naples is an absolute shithole. Worst city in Italy by far. Still fun though I like shitholes.

It's not that bad nowadays, ever since the army started being on every street corner, at least you don't get robbed immediately on arrival at the train station.
There used to be cases the full length of the fuckin' street outside, strewn with clock radios, burst-into suitcases and knock-off designer shoes. Absolute fucking animals, neopolitans.

More than one people can be shit you fucking retard. Go back to /pol/, I can be for my people while disliking a thing they do.
Japs are fucking awful too. The middle east are fucking disgusting.

Good lad, user, that's more like it.

>and starts punching himself in the head until his knuckles are blue
Isn't that a symptom of abuse?

It's low functioning autism

It's never too late user

I went over to my friends house and he told me to come into the backyard. Him and his older brother were playing catch because they had baseball gloves on. What I only realized a bit later was instead of a baseball they were using a small kitten they'd found hiding under their house.

>parents never hit me

Get back to fort nite, zoomer

Man shit like this depresses me, even as a child I never had the inclination to harm any animal in any way. How the hell do parents raise evil fucks like that?

>play video game with childhood friend
>he wins
>he begins bouncing up and down in the sofa right next to me
>lands ontop of my lap
>we go queit
>he starts moving his ass
>we dont say anything
>i plant a kiss on his cheek and place my arms around his torso
>*Hyaa*
>my hand is massaging his shorts
>push my hand down under the shorts into his boxers
>start feeling around
>i start to peel his foreskin
>he ejaculates and turns around,he places his arms around my neck and places a kiss on my lips.
>we kiss for a few minutes
>he says ”i love you so much..”
>i love you too

>they thought I was gay.
>I play jrpg
Looks like they were spot on

yo wtf

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Ivan!?