HE WAS A CONSOLE OF ROME
roman vidya thread
HE WAS A CONSOLE OF ROME
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is there any actual good newish roman vidya, r2tw and imperator both are meh
>True faggot threads, for true faggots
FLAAAAVIO
WOULD YOU PLEASE SHUT THE DOOOOOOR
>Roman consolefagging
Best character in the show
>Imagine being a hippodromeme
Newish? No.
have you guys every played the game with the hero bofades in it
Any games that let me BTFO Ga*lic savages?
Rome: Total War is still pretty much the only good one.
Caesar was such a fucking chad
>got captured by pirates
>told them to keep quiet while he was sleeping and applaud his shitty poetry when he read it to them
>was such a badass he ended up practically becoming their leader
>promised he would still crucify the lot of them for ever fucking with him
>they laughed thinking it was a joke
>he gets released, then immediately crucifies the lot of them
>fucked senators wives and openly teased them about it in public
>bribed everyone and openly exposed how corrupt the senators were
>utterly raped half of europe into submission despite being heavily outnumbered simply because he was bored
>scared the germans with his bridge building skillz so badly they didnt leave their forests for 200 years
>first roman to set foot on the british isles, which he then conquered
>just wanted a land reform, never wanted a civil war
>forgave everyone who fought against him
>got absolutley furious that some egyptian manlet killed his rival, personally executed the assassins
>was planning to rape and subjugate the parthian empire just before his untimely demise
The chaddest chad to ever chad
1st or 2nd one?
First. Second is ok but the abysmal launch soured me on it.
What would be his favorite vidya?
Okay, thanks.
Yeah you forgot
>lost his virginity to an Eastern king
GODS
Ah yes Suetonius, he also claimed caesar was a femboy who dressed up as a girl and plucked his anus hairs
Reliable source
johndclare.net
What exactly makes Plutarch so reliable?
He is generally considered more reliable because he wasn't just writing court gossip
Suetonius said a lot of shit about lots of people, its likely that most of it was just rumors or slander thrown around. The fucking an eastern king thing came from Caesars enemies in the senate who thought it would piss him off if they implied the guy who was having affairs with their wives was actually a fag taking it in the ass from a foreigner. Its highly unlikely that actually happened.
Although I think the hair plucking bit is accurate, he used to pluck his ENTIRE body
Not that user, but Seutonius isn't considered a reliable author because almost everything he wrote down was an actual shitpost of events that happened hundreds of years before he was even born. Plutarch at least avoids grossly exaggerated gossip.
N-No he wasn't, La-penis was the true reason Caesar did so well!
I haven't watched him in a while does he hate Caesar now? He used to love him
Much truth is said in jest. I'm not saying he's more reliable, but if you believe Plutarch, it's not a stretch to use Suetonius as an historical source.
Your dates are wrong. And Plutarch and Suetonius are roughly contemporary. They had the same information dumb dumb.
ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGH
CRASSUS
YOU SAID THEY WOULD RUN OUT OF ARROWS TWO HOURS AGO
CRASSUUUUUUUUUUUUS
THEY'RE NOT RUNNING OUT OF ARROWS, CRASSUS
you think a hardened war hero and roman patriot who famously fucked dozens of women was actually a bottom for a foreign king
cmon lad, its such obvious trash talk
Oh lol you fell for the macho man propaganda meme. Never mind then I'm done here.
In his latest video he says something like
>for all of its flaws Republican rome was a better system then basing the government around the life of one man which Caesar whether he would admit it or not was in fact doing
And often brought up Caesars throne that wasn't a throne just a special chair in the Senate solely for Caesar to preside over Rome in
But I also recall him often exclaiming Caesars military genius at Alesia and he also called Cato an idiot for ruining peace talks before the civil war so I'd say he sides moreso with Cicero.
It is possible to be both y'know
>sullas daughter
>pompeys wife
>brutus' mom
>cleopatra
>all confirmed
and rumors of pretty much every senators wife
if you believe the gay rumors then why do you dismiss both objective fact and other rumors
>tfw shadow of rome will never get a new installment
>dates are wrong
>roughly contemporary
Seutonius was born in 69 AD. That's over a hundred years after Caesar died in 44 BC.
Possible but highly unlikely considering the many enemies he had and the countless other rumors out there about him
Believe what you want lol
Based channel
Can you not be accused of possibly falling for propaganda, yourself? No one knows the truth of it
Why yes, I think Emperor Aurelian was the greatest Roman who ever lived, how could you tell?
He's pointing out that Julius was an egomaniac who didn't give two fucks about Rome, which is true. And VERY IMPORTANT for people to understand why Augustus was such a big deal despite being a poor general.
He means Plutarch was born around the same period which is true, however Plutarch is obviously more reliable because his sources are corroborated whereas Suetonius was just writing gossip and scandals, basically ancient celeb magazines
1 is good and all, but it's age is really starting to show, especially in battle. Plus TWR2 has a campaign that is specifically about Ceasar utterly humiliating g*uls.
Yeah him specifically bottoming specifically for the king of Bythinia is unlikely. I'm just saying historical figures are multi-faceted.
>He's pointing out that Julius was an egomaniac who didn't give two fucks about Rome, which is true.
That is ridiculously untrue and I'm sorry but I'll take the word of actual historians who study this shit for a living over some e-celeb
You should check out The History of Rome podcast
Listened through all of it in a week. You know it's true.
I wish The Legion in New Vegas wasn't cut so bad because then we might actually sympathize with them.
>didnt give two fucks about rome
Aside from that land reform bill where he wanted to take land from the rich and give it to the poor to become farm land and fix the unemployment problem
Yeah totally didnt care about rome lol
Populism.
Caesar's dialogue is so jarring compared to what the Legion is actually like
I loved his character but the tech autism and slavery was a bit much
The argument is already muddled because he's using whataboutism with Plutarch
>people can only be populist for cynical reasons
ok libtard
>Populism.
AND?
I wish they were more roman in general. We never really see a big impact on their culture. They supposedly speak only latin, have intricate bureaucratic institutions, temples and shit but it's never shown, just written on the fucking guide.
They could have reused the neoclassical elements of the buildings from 3's assets and made a patchwork faux roman civillian town.
Its the biggest missed opportunity in vidya
I remember him getting upset at Caesar chopping hands off but desu they ambushed and slaughtered a whole legion, killing Caesars friend, so I can sympathise with his rage
But in another video about Germanicus I think he says "my boy Caesar wouldnt fuck up like this" or something to that effect
Idk how he feels but I still like his videos
Caesar >>>>>>>> Cicero > Cato
>Doing what the people want in a democracy is populism
I feel as if i'm listening to tv news
Did you skip the whole Gracchi debaccle? You need to know your history if you're going to discuss the Caesars.
He only did it to be popular, not because it was good for Rome. Once he became unchallenged ruler of Rome he started making unpopular reforms.
Why is the art of making gestures to accentuate your speech so utterly lost in 2019?
This is blatantly a Yea Forums thread, fuck off you dumb Trojan-cunny-poster.
Go to italy
Caesar got fucked by the king of Bithynia, forever becoming a little bitch. Rome never forgot.
BIGGUS
Fascism.
Or New York
I know my history you autist, how is the land reform bill a sinister thing? Do you have any clue how bad shit was in the late republic? Thousands of umeployed were dying in the streets while the senators were up on their hill having orgies and LARPing as republicans while they secretly bribed every election
Caesar grew up in the slums of Rome is it so hard to imagine he genuinely sympathised with their plight and had a vendetta against the nobles who tried to fuck his family into the dirt?
Paranoia about populism doesnt imply morality whatsoever, Rome NEEDED change and you could have done a lot worse than Caesar. Like the Gracchi or Marius.
*builds a fort around u*
Troy was about 1000 years before Caesar you stupid faggot
Shut the fuck up, technocrat
Heh, nothing personnel, Gaulic savages
This is low key the true power of the Romans. Every soldier an engineer.
i-its not like i want to circumvallate your city or anything, baka!
>Caesar grew up in the slums of Rome
You mean part of a legendary dynasty in the best city in the world? He was annointed Flamen Dialis at age 16; don't pretend he wasn't born with a diamond spoon in his mouth and saw the poor as expendable numbers. If nothing else, his constant warring and triumphant cheer at the death of his own countrymen prove you wrong.
The sad truth about Julius is that he painted himself into a corner pretty early on in his career by being impatient and not playing by the rules, and spent the entire rest of his life getting into a position where he could rewrite the rules to benefit himself. How anyone with half a brain could misinterpret this very obvious sequence of events is beyond me. Go fuck yourselves.
Go fuck yourselves.
its not like i want to destroy you or anything, baka!
carthagodelendaest~
Did they fix imperator rome?
Imagine them making a testudo formation with riot shields or bulletproof ones, NCR would be even more fucked
What's your dream Rome game, brehs?
>Set during the late republic How original, i know
>Witcher/Fallout like rpg
>Generic, pleb shopowner protag
>Wealthy family member gets killed during Sulla's dictatorship and the protag investigates, getting in all shorts of dangerous situations and uncovering conspiracies
>Basically a film noir set in Rome
>You mean part of a legendary dynasty in the best city in the world? He was annointed Flamen Dialis at age 16; don't pretend he wasn't born with a diamond spoon in his mouth and saw the poor as expendable numbers.
Holy shit I cant believe you are this historically illiterate.
He was born into a middle class family, his parents only had money because Marius married into his family for Patrician status and left a dowry for him.
He grew up in a literal tenant house in the suburba, which was a shithole. He was raised almost entirely by his mother and the plebs living in the tenant house, many of the women there breast fed him.
He was proscribed by Sulla when he was about 8 and had to flee Rome, then Caesars mum convinced Sulla to let him return and as a peace gesture gave him his daughter in marriage and a preist position that conveniently forbade him from leading troops or ever leaving the city. It wasnt a privilege to be flamen dialis it was to keep him under control.
>If nothing else, his constant warring and triumphant cheer at the death of his own countrymen prove you wrong.
You have such an utterly basic grasp of the Civil War I'm not even going to respond. Read a book on it or something.
>The sad truth about Julius is that he painted himself into a corner pretty early on in his career by being impatient and not playing by the rules, and spent the entire rest of his life getting into a position where he could rewrite the rules to benefit himself.
He was fucked by the senate at every step of the way, even going as far as making EVERY DAY until the end of his consulship a fucking public holiday so he couldnt pass the land reform bill that would unfortunately take their land where they had their holiday villas.
I cant believe you are unironically defending these fucking pricks lmao.
>How anyone with half a brain could misinterpret this very obvious sequence of events is beyond me. Go fuck yourselves.
The irony
Don't forget that he basically raised his own clone with Augustus who proceeded to be just as based as his uncle.
*dabs on you from atop elephants surfing down a river*
No. They're in the process of removing mana which is idiotic and pointless. Kind of like making a game based on the renaissance but set in the classical era was in the first place.
I said "go fuck yourself", not "waste everyone's time with your 5th grade knowledge of history and non-arguments." Saying that "they started it!" (which they didn't BTW) doesn't automatically justify his actions.
*blocks your path*
>how is the land reform bill a sinister thing
Who said anything about sinister? Have you never done a "good" thing simply because you wanted the positive attention gotten from it? Benevolent acts can have selfish reasons
I'll take that as your concession of defeat, go be butthurt about ebul dictators on /his/
Caesar objectively did absolutley nothing wrong other than sparing the lives of his ungrateful enemies
The historychad
The virgin shit for brains
So you admit he was a fool, then? No wonder you idolize him.
Yeah a fool for thinking men had honour
You sit here and call Julius Caesar a fool? What does that make you and I, buddy?
That is pretty dumb I suppose.
I didn't; he did. I think Julius was a brilliant man. Who ultimately cared more about himself than Rome, unlike his successor.
octavian was a good administrator, but had none of caesar's military prowess, though he was intelligent enough to delegate those tasks to people who were good at it.
Its quite literally the other way around kek
Augustus drowned Caesars legitimate son in the Nile
*Thot audits*
See, this is why I told you all to go fuck yourselves. On what basis do you propose Cesarian would have been better for Rome than Augustus? I want an explanation for this bullshit but you never give me one because you're dumb.