Here is my female character. Her name is Pathetic Submissive Baby. She was raped every day since she was a baby. She has a bomb in her vagina and if she doesn't wear a slutty bikini every day it will explode and kill her. If you think this is retarded you should be ashamed.
Itt: we write like Kojima
Owen Flores
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Robert Sullivan
But something happened on the day they put a bomb in her vagina. In a fit of sexy submissiveness, all the men attacking her village died horribly. They say she's been demure and conventionally attractive ever since.
>Drebin, why are you telling me this?
Because, Snake, I really don't know how to cover my ass without Fukushima picking up the slack.
Wyatt Cox
Okay but this is Kojima turned up 100%, not very accurate.
Gabriel Morgan
???
wouldnt 100% be accurate?
Easton King
I meant x100
Kayden Perez
thats because its a joke dumbass
Xavier Brown
>ITT we write like a seething roastie
Asian women don't even look good who wants a young looking wife that has a sense of humor and no tattoos and comes from a long line of tradition why wouldn't you want a REAL woman who has had lots of ADVENTURES and traveled to MOROCCO like me i mean just look at me i have awesome BUDDHIST TATTOOS to show how SPIRITUAL BUT NOT RELIGIOUS i am clearly IM the better choice even my ex boyfriend Tyrone said so.
Leo Lewis
nigga what
Dylan Carter
Based
Jacob Bailey
did you have a seizure
Cooper Ward
Your company is doomed. Your public image is getting worse every day. Kojima is FREE now and you have absolutely zero way of controlling him. You're boiling with anger and there's nothing you can do about it. Delicious.
Oliver Gomez
>I love my dog. I LOVE my dog. I don't think you're understanding me. I L O V E my dog. And he loves peanut butter.
Cooper Bailey
Drebin bedtime story parodies are my favourite kind of MGS4 joke.
Levi Gutierrez
NOOOO BRADU
Colton Lopez
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youtube.com
Also VIDEOGAMES
Brody Diaz
>Pathetic Submissive Baby
based
Jason Russell
>write like Kojima
Coming from my background wasn't an easy thing, but I somehow managed to keep my innards where they belong, Snake. You listening to me? There's nothing you can do to stop the rumors from spreading, but you'll be damn sure you can stop the people from making them in the first place. It's not an easy task being the one who everyone relies on: you choose a side and only about 20% of the people will follow up right behind you.. the rest? They will question and create their own agendas, new fractions getting made right there on the spot, just because they didn't like the idea of following someone else's ideas. Even if those are just the ideals of someone far greater than any of us, Snake. Her will. Samantha America Strand Violent Raging Bull. You need to finish what she started. Go west and carry out her legacy! Now go! Return as the Grand Strand, Snake! Become the doorway for all of us!
Jason Jones
>turned up 100%
so.. wait, from zero to a hundred it means it's a hundred percent Kojima then?
David Carter
Jacob Long
he took a cigarette and smoked it like joint
Hunter Cox
are you implying women put peanut butter in their vaginas?
that seems unsanitary
Daniel Wilson
>we write like Kojima
>proceeds to write like a snarky feminist cunt
Is this foreshadowing?
Elijah Diaz
>OP will never be a famous videogame director
>his videogame franchise will never be hailed as a masterpiece
>he will never have his own studio
How will OP cope next?
Hunter Gutierrez
>t. roastie OR roastie lover OR some poor wagie who got stuck with some roastie for life
LMFAO
Alexander Reed
Submissive pathetic women still beat feminist propaganda like bayonetta
Adrian Perez
>haha I bet you have sex!
Jaxon Collins
>oh boy I love having sex with the same woman every time SHE wants!
Brayden Ortiz
Feminists have hated him since forever lol.
Ryder Robinson
I LOVE cats! I absolutely L O V E cats! I have a tattoo that says "cat mom" and I wear tshirts and hats that say I'm a crazy cat lady! Ironically, of course!
Jordan Gray
>linking a video made by one of the most biased youtube channels in existence
Are we just going to forget the tripe that was their Tomm Huelett two parter, where they decried people for shifting all the blame to one guy (who was proven to be a liar and an asshole) and attacking him, and then shifted all the blame and attacked some other people at the end? In addition to becoming butt buddies with Fungo, a guy caught on stream for abusing his gf and Tomm's excuse is "We're friends now so it doesn't matter."
Colton Mitchell
>n-no stop making fun of daddy Kojima!
>daddy Kojima is perfect in every way!
Christopher Allen
citation needed
Evan Richardson
How old were you when you discovered Kojima is kinda retarded?
Camden Moore
strawman
>ITS JUST JOKES LOL
Joseph Jackson
*PSTKSSSSsssssss* mmmm nothing like a cold White Monster Energy Ultra, zero sugar, lighter-tasting, zero calories, but with a full load of Monster energy blend. Sure, white is the new black. Monster Energy Zero Ultra. Unleash The Ultra Beast!
James Rogers
All I see is soul
James Harris
Owen Wright
nigger do you know what a hyperbole is
Justin Long
Why is the psychiatrist a ghetto n*gger?
Brandon Torres
lmao
Leo Green
/thread
Jack Foster
President America Strand
Ryan Ward
see
Christian Hughes
Fat Skinnyman
Chase Russell
uhm... I have few names for you Mr. Kojima
Strong, Emancipated, Fearless, Jew's Agenda
Kayden Moore
see
Joseph Cooper
By foreshadowing I meant that now Kojimbo is rubbing shoulders with western Pedowood celebrities and will probably end up as a snarky feminism cunt himself.
Jacob Gray
Reminder that these are the people behind every seething "Hackjima" thread.
Michael Richardson
noooooooo dont criticize Kojima noooooo hes my daddy
kojima let me suck your diiiick
Aaron Russell
u okay buddy?
Hunter Richardson
There's some anons that will enter any Kojima related threads and pretend to be a fan to make anyone that likes Kojima seem crazy. It must be some sort of mental illness.
Gabriel Adams
Damn that's fucking terrible. Nothing beats the source himself.
Bentley Wilson
Truly the wort war orphan to have ever lived
Parker Gutierrez
did you rike it?
Gabriel Fisher
Nukes are bad and war is bad. Also, the plot and characters are basically plagiarized from whatever Hollywood blockbusters and/or TV shows that I've been recently watching, only modified with my japanese autism. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go masturbate into a pair margaret qualley's panties.
Eli Ortiz
I dunno but now we know why he isn't doing a very good job
Michael Reed
Kojima is the epitome of a based retard and he is one hundred percent correct here.
Bentley Johnson
>Character
Fresh Staleman
>Backstory
Raised by hackers on the run from a tyrannical global IT company that runs the world. Knows a hell of a lot about computers and how to procure illegal tech (made illegal by the global IT empire/company which will now be called C.O.P.E meaning Consensual Operations Promoting Equity.
>Twist
While imprisoned by COPE in a top secret prison he is interrogated for information about his elusive parents who are deemed among the biggest terrorists in the world. Over the course of the interrogation it turns out that he's not even captured. He is in a VR AI program to test his loyalty to the outlaws whom we will now call Venti Rabbia (the twenty angers because there are twenty members). He is relieved but form that moment a rift grows between him and Venti Rabbia and he begins to yearn to join COPE. Over the course of his development he learns that COPE are actually the good guys while Venti Rabbia are super tech terrorists. However at the end of the game he finds out that neither group are good or bad because he discovers that he's inside a video game and the rest of the story is him trying to escape the video game but he can't. Credits roll and play Starsailor.