KFC Dating Sim

you forgot the step
>actually get licensed to do it

If there's no ending where the colonel makes the brown one a slave I'll drop it. I will do it

LOL SO RANDUM XD

99% of these shitheaps are just "dude what if we made a romance VN but the girl you were romancing was actually a plane LMAO" or some shit

and not even like an anime girl plane before you get on your gijinka shit with those kantai collections and whatnot

yeah, but 99% of them aren't official parodies licensed and published by a fast food franchise.

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that just makes it infinitely worse

Ok, yes, can't argue with you there because it's guaranteed to be cringey shit that had to be okayed by corporate suits and focus testers.

Do you play as colonel sanders trying to seduceor are you trying to seduce colonel sanders?

The Yo! Noid 2 devs almost got a deal with dominoes to make it official.

youtu.be/ZBaxOEr7qbI?t=988

The totinos thing with strafe.

Doritoes dash of destruction was a thing: youtube.com/watch?v=Zqc4W199PLc

Weird advertising/marketing works quite well in some circumstances.

Well, KFC is really good. I usually order once a month from there.

you try to seduce sanders

Ok I wanna just say to everybody, she's my wife, I already claimed her, sorry guys

>Publisher: KFC
>Developer: Psyop
Is this some kind of elaborate ruse

KFC smells delicious, but I remember it tasting like greasy, slick garbage

So is this worth getting?

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I wish I had a KFC in my town.

No

I know brainless porn beasts are gonna see those thighs and think they're hot but they don't even look remotely proportionate to the rest of the body. Hell they barely look attached to the body.

And don't get me wrong I enjoy a good thick thigh or two but some basic fucking anatomy goes a long way.

Listen man if I'm getting my jollies to anime women I've already given up on proper facial structure. As long as the form is humanoid I can appreciate the exaggerations of specific attributes such as meaty legs.

>chick in kfc game
>has over emphasised thighs and breasts
yeah...

this is like saying it's okay for a game's story to be an inconsistent mess because "who cares it's just a made up video game world anyway"

Damn, I'm weak to girls with very long, big, fat ponytails.

I'll break it down for you
It's a chicken joke about boiler chickens. Pull your head out of your ass.

NO NO NO NOT AGAIN

I'M GONNA

I'M GONNA

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Not every meal needs to be 5 stars. Let a man eat some greasy fast food chicken to indulge in the absurd every now and then

you're chicken a shit

yes

Can we get a switch port?

Otherwise its trash.

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Finger lickin' good

It's an ad dummy

BASED
Hope she got best girl.

So......Porn when?

Back to with you.

those thighs are outrageous

Is KFC better than Popeyes?

the only thing worse than this game is all the ironic weebs that are praising it just for existing and calling it wacky (and you know, not a totally calculated marketing stunt aimed at a specific demographic)

I even saw one dude saying this was the next pepsiman and it made me want to fucking neck myself

>kfc videogame
>theres 2 niggers on it
lmao based.

Why are there so many ironic “self-aware” VNs now? These guys probably don’t even play VNs.

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Because they're notoriously easy to make

of course they don't, why are you even implying they might? just one glance at any of them should tell they have no knowledge or care for the genre.

these things are made because the actual dev work is far simpler (just get renpy or something to that effect) compared to having to test any kind of action-based game and these are all made by shitty wannabe idea guys that know some artist or musician they found on tumblr four years ago to do the actual work for them.

>easy to make
>ironic weebs will buy them
>free advertising from "quirky" youtubers

maybe

Imagine how fat the ugly triggered autist who made this must be

>they have no knowledge or care for the genre.
Why would anybody care about a genre that is literally just a relationship supplement for mentally ill incels? Thank god you ugly freaks are being publicly mocked, hopefully you all kill yourselves

>VNs are purely romance sims
thanks for proving my point

no

I don't know

Why do people like this come to Yea Forums? There must be a thought process behind normies coming to places full of things they don't like and complaining about them and the people who dwell there.

>dating sim
>no nudity
What's the point?
Even the chicken thighs are covered.

Honestly these kinds of games annoy me but it's not something I really get worked up over usually. It's more that I just think this "always ironic " mindset is a goddamn disease and these ironic VNs are the most distilled version of that out there. This one in particular though I think crosses the line to push me into a borderline rage because it's all that same trash except now it's being used to sell you fast food, and people will eat it up solely because they think it's better to treat everything like a joke to the point that they would rather play a visual novel based on colonel sanders telling you how good his shitty chicken is instead of just enjoying something genuinely because that might lead to them being mocked for being "cringe."

This unironically looks really good. Way better than that shitty gamegrumps Dream Daddy game at least.

So can you fuck the dog?

can you repeat the question?

Was just about to say this

Weird timeline we're in

LIL 'TARD!
LIL 'TARD!

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The ritual is complete

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>developer: Psyop
>This is their logo

Hmmmm...

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HOLY FUCK DIDN'T NOTICE THOSE THIGHS.

KFC knows their audience.

>We are iconic, visual storytellers that blur the lines between advertising and entertainment. Our mission is to Persuade, Change, and Influence.
I honestly can't tell just how many levels these guys are working on.

WTF I love KFC now

>What's wrong Ronald-kun? Could it be you're craving my original recipe??

I'm glad the actual colonel isn't alive to see this

To make my dick hard, that's why

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Just like the outrageous thighs available at your local Kentucky fried chicken.

because japan, KFC is basicly a meme over there where everyone orders chicken for christmas.

I can’t believe that the family agreed to this.

KFC in Japan fucking sucks. $5 for a SINGLE portion of chicken with some pastries and a coke. Seriously, fuck food in Japan.

Dominos in Japan is also expensive af, like bro it's just pizza they treat it like some luxury food

Why the hell would you go to KFC in Japan? Surely there's better places to get fried chicken.

I actually do really hate this age where everything needs to be steeped in layers of irony to shield yourself from ridicule. The term ironic weeb gets thrown around a lot, but I personally know a bunch of people that were like "dude check out this hatoful boyfriend thing it's so funny and weird haha I love this" and play all the latest meme VNs but then if I try to recommend even the most basic bitch entry level VNs they go "wtf I don't like that weird shit lol."

fun fact: KFC invented black people

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>KFC fucking sucks
FTFY. Last time I went there the chicken was fucking soggy as shit to the point where the breading was falling off the chicken, and apparently our store removed potato wedges as a side.

learn to cook yourself and you'll save money and eat better tasting food

Colonel Sanders looks disgusted having to stand so close to a NIGGER

Please enlighten me.
I fucking know, right? Last time I had pizza here it as $8 for a 7" and it was absolute shit. The cheese and the ham didn't even stick to the bread and for some reason they thought olive oil would be a good addition.

>guy from kentucky doesn't want to stand next to a negro
SHOCKER

he'd be out of business if he didn't

This user knows

>learn to cook yourself
I would but I'm terrified of flame and hot surfaces in general. I can't even boil water without shaking uncontrolably.

Wendy’s vn when?

KFC did two shockingly good DC Comics crossovers about the KFC multiverse, including an Evil Colonel.
Could storytime if anyone's interested.

Excuse me sir, can i see your N-Pass please?

Did a stovetop touch your butthole when you were young or something?

>get banned from the discussions for making an inappropriate "finger licking good" joke

oh my god it's neil degrassi mike tyson the science guy

>Sanders remained critical of Kentucky Fried Chicken's food. In the late 1970s he told the Louisville Courier-Journal:
>My God, that gravy is horrible. They buy tap water for 15 to 20 cents a thousand gallons and then they mix it with flour and starch and end up with pure wallpaper paste. And I know wallpaper paste, by God, because I've seen my mother make it. ... There's no nutrition in it and they ought not to be allowed to sell it. ... crispy recipe is nothing in the world but a damn fried doughball stuck on some chicken.

Actually a third one came out already
And yes please on the storytime

well the only solution according to science is to throw yourself into a pan of boiling hot water
you'll find out it's perfectly harmless and it can't hurt you and your phobia will be fixed almost instantly

Do it

Burned myself on a clothes iron. The skin stuck to the metal I also had boiling oil jump straight into my eye. The fear is engraved in me.

i mean, it's no sneak king

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>game has waifus
>only one romance path available

Awful.

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nigga looks like a jojo character

Because you get the simplicity of a VN meaning not much to develop, but also get to not have to know how to write a VN because you just say "It's ironic!" and deflect all criticism.
Because these guys don't have any respect for the real shit, but they're more than happy to capitalize on the same meta jokes every ironic VN makes.

I thought Yea Forums said every single big corporation was ultra woke and hated hot/big tittied females? How does that titty monster chicken thot pie exist then?

Good God, man

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Wait, do you play as the Colonel?

Don't call her a thot, she's my wife.

Can't believe a jojo character is in a KFC dating sim

My dad just lost an erection

Fast food companies tend to avoid directly and openly siding with one side or the other, because you risk pissing off the people who you don't side with. Remember the whole chic-fil-a fiasco?
And at the end of the day, everyone knows that the people running the companies are obviously republicans hoping to get tax breaks anyways so why bother?

You play as a faceless character trying to date the Colonel. It is assumed that your character is female and that the Colonel path is the only option available to you, so it is a quick playthrough with some basic choices (probably a choice of "I take it easy/I work hard" and "I can keep secrets/I will tell everyone how you made that chicken") and then at the end you're told to go to KFC. So everyone nutting to the thicc bitch will be out of luck, she'll just be a villain who you have to stop with Colonel Sanders after she steals his secret herbs and spices.

Are you free for dinner tonight?

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If this is made using Ren'Py, someone could just edit the game and make the MC a futa and can rape the rival bitch

never had kfc before but want it after my black roommate came back with a bucket, is it any good

You might have misunderstood her figure, there's nothing wrong with her proportions as far as ecchi anime shit goes.
Maybe it's the black thing on the side of her shirt or just the skirt.

Seriously, your roommate just brought back some KFC and you're asking US if it's any good?

his opinion might be biased

Depends on the store, but in a lot of areas it's really expensive for what it is. I used to be able to get a full meal there for like 5 bucks and now in recent years it's like 9 or 10. For that price you could get better quality chicken elsewhere.

Go get the cheeto sandwich, it’s a gateway food to see if you’ll like kfc in general

>For that price you could get better quality chicken elsewhere
WHEREEEEEEE
I'm in Japan and I'm starved for some good, cheap chicken. The best I've done so far is 14 fried chicken pieces (~450g) for 1000 yen.

>they stopped serving it in my area
My cheat days got sadder

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That's honestly better than KFC prices in the states. Here an 8 piece bucket from KFC with no sides or anything is $15.

How much is family mart selling their chicken for?

>developer:psyop

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Not gonna lie, that's a pretty good trailer and Sanders looks hot. Don't even have KFC anywhere near where I live though so I don't even know if KFC is any good.

>Cheeto sandwich
That shit's gross.

> That's honestly better than KFC prices in the states.
Sure, but I wish I could pay half price for half the chicken. 1000yen is way too much for a meal.
Sorry, I barely ever visit Family Mart. I go to Lawson.

wendy's BTFO?

>She has thighs like that presumably because she eats so much fried chicken
KFC wants my attention, and they have it.

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the character designs are tumblr tier

How? Those designs are like the most basic bitch safe anime style you can get. Most of the tumblr art I've had to unfortunately witness looks more like steven universe shit.

That's literally the point

I'm kind of in the mood for some chicken thighs.

Broly loves chicken!

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And yeah Flash had a really retarded costume at this time

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>KFC officially publishes this game
>this character is in it
>cum-bums foam and demand porn
>fotm Twitter porn artists draw the shit out of her
>catches normie attention and they run it into the ground
>this was KFC’s intention all along
Calling it now

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Chicken places in general tend to be based. See Chick Fil A

This is my second favorite story featuring superpeople working at fast food joints

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>everyone: I want to fap more than get chicken
>Colonel: I'm coming

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Are these all of her references?

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Seems like it. Got something planned, user?

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Unintentionally racist

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[X] tug ponytail

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I doubt I'll have it done in time before this thread's over, but I'm gonna draw her sharing a dildo with Pizza thot.

Shots fired at McDonk

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didn't arbys do that like a month ago

Wow, i sure do love ironic dating sims! Sure the writing is literally the same shit over and over with added "UUUUGGGUUUUUU KAIWAI DESU COLONEL-SAN!" but at least i can know what it's like playing with literal maggot infested shit.

I believe in you. Good luck.

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>Are we supposed to believe this is a, MAGIC Colonel of some sort? Boy, I sure hope someone got fired for that

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I dunno, I don't really care. I'm just amused by the fact that KFC published a dating simulator at all. It's probably going to be shit but I don't even see why anyone would waste energy being angry about a game where you can date Sanders exists. Everyone knows it's just soulless corporate marketing so might as well just have fun with it.

You’re assuming literally all of this

>gravy pen
Where do I get one

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>KFC dating sim
Meanwhile KFC USA can't even get a mobile app.
Generally restaurant quality has been gone downhill for past 5-10 years as well.

only go for crispy, the original recipe is doughy slimey garbage

Why hasnt wendy's made a porn game yet bros?
I wanna eat her roast beef!

Looks much better than that cringy ass gamegrumps Dream Daddy

>Pizza thot.
Way to ruin it

Cover after Kevin Maguire, the oft-referenced "elevator cover" for Justice League #1, aka Justice League International.

I don't really get why someone would want a fast food app taking up space on their phone

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>I wanna eat her roast beef!
But Wendys doesn't serve roast beef
You can frosty her face though.

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Except it backfired with their waifu because twitter trannies were upset she was drawn in a chibi style that made her look like a loli

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Uh this should be Earth-0, again I sure hope someone got fired for that mistake!

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Surely femColonel will be a DLC route, right?

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They're from Earth-22, btw, the Rule 63 universe

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From Gotham by Gaslight

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Based!

>cosmic treadmill

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I have a few installed because they give free shit and discounts pretty often.

Wait sorry, Earth-11 is Rule 63, 22 is Kingdom Come

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Yes, it's a Flash staple for time traveling that also is used for multiversal travel. Was a big plotpoint when it was in the Flash Museum in Central City and was used by the Reverse-Flash.

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Kamandi Earth, btw

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Looks like they got Red Son Colonel, Justice Riders Colonel, and I'm not sure who All-Star Colonel is unless he's from the pulp Earth

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I can see how it'd be useful, a treadmill able to handle super speed allowing for time travel without actually moving from a location, but it's still fucking stupid, it's up there with the hot tub time machine

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Comics ARE stupid, which is why I love them

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please tell me this has some cheesy as fuck J-Pop playing

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It's less the treadmill and more The Flash. Speedforce shenanigans.

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Well I mean they're honest. It is advertising. Aren't ads psyops in essence?

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Is that a fang? Good lord.

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This isn't even the first game they've made.
Before this was a VR game where you learned to make chicken in an ominous room where the Colonel demands you make the chicken to escape.

After Green Lantern/Green Arrow, where Arrow takes Lantern on a cross country trip to learn all about various sociopolitical issues of the 70's

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Yes. And her shirt is tight enough to show off her navel.

it's a harmless joke comic, sperg

Colonel Sanders is a fucking dork.

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great

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>KFC funds a fictional 80s wrestling promotion created by WWE
>KFC funds a VN
Their advertising choices certainly are unique.

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Comics have gone too far.

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>We live in a timeline where fast food restaurants can jump into any medium they want and do a better job than indie groups
We just need a non-MUGEN crossover fighting game, and this timeline will be the best.

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I like how this implies he made tiny, squirrel sized sandwiches

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>Granny Goodness wants to bang the Colonel

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O shit

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>Corporate actually approved the funding of this

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WOOO CRISPY

>KFC chan gets a shit ton of lewds
>KFC starts actually retweeting their favorites
imagine if they did that

I'd unironically buy more chicken desu

You think they will allow us to date the Pressure Fryer?

I mean, why not?

Someday a major brand will delve deep into porn for advertising.

>mfw I have classes for the next 6hrs
Different drawfag, I'd do something as well Post in the drawthread so I wouldn't forget

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watch this webm listening to youtu.be/XrTfBMW3o1c?t=13
mfw

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OH MY GOD BROS, IM GONNA FUCKING CUM!!!
HNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG!!!

Now if only her belly matched those plump thighs

she still has to be attractive for normies user, sorry.

yeah imagine if people came to the videogame board to complain about videogames, that'd be crazy.

>care for the genre
lol @ these people thinking the VN industry has any standards when fateshit is the most popular one by far and there's hundreds of thousands of cheap porn vns out there.

Not true, see: Wendy's taking advantage of lewd artists.

My father just lost an erection

When a little bit wouldn't hurt. Normies have no taste

Japan did it first

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>Normies have no taste
Truer words have never been spoken.

Doesn't KFC have the VR training thing for employees?

>7 hours later
>Not even 1 image of this thigh demon

Fuck yeah, Adam Strange

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yes and last year they did that robocop advertisements with peter weller even though nothing was going on with Robocop.

>KFC quality plummiting by the minute
>zero variety, prices shit compared to literally any other chain
>KFC has a new scandal every other day, pr is terrible
>so desperate to stay relevant they start doing wildly autistic shit
>form esports team, please buy our food
>make video games, please buy our food
>make comics, please buy our food
>steal Old Spice commercials, make them about chicken please god buy our food
>rebrand the colonel a dozen times in the last few years
>each one more autistic than the last to the point where he's a sassy transbian millennial
>now they're coming for the weebs because it's the only bastion they haven't tried to choke out in their desperate scramble for money
>release ironic meme dating sim game, very original idea
>instead of lambasting them, semen cerebrums are hooting and hollering because mspaint quality female character is visible on screen
>people will unironically download and ingest corporate brainwashing
MMM YES PLEASE MEGALOCORP GIVE ME YOUR COCK YUMMY YUMMY ME LOVE THE YUMMY FOOD POST MAI WAIFU AGAIN OH GOD SO GOOD YES I LOVE THE COLONEL I NEED HIS 11 HERBS AND SPLOOGES SO AMAZING OH GOD YES

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user, look at her navel, her belly is pushing against the shirt.

I'm not downloading this shit. VNs suck and I haven't eaten at KFC in my life. I just want people to make content of the girl with the aggressive thigh meat while she's halfway-relevant so I can store it away for a rainy day.

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Tell that the American KFC, over here in Europe the quality is fine and commercials aren't batshit insane.

>Get free game
>Laugh at absurdity
>Fap to porn of absolutely stupid thick girl
And I didn't even have to buy any chicken

KFC is fine in Canada tbqh.

It is literally the same, just that Canadians have no taste.

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>Literally traced Mako from KLK

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>Literally the same

I dunno about in the US, but KFC Canada donates remainin chicken to charity so it doesn't go to waste, buy from Canadian farmers and a buncha other things. Different products too, like KFC poutine.

hey user, can you romance the thigh girl and the jojo guy?

Gender-bent FFC nip version when?

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I don't know what you're trying to prove? You can order poutine at US KFC, and they donate their food through the KFC Foundation. I guess the only difference is that they locally source poultry which is basically the same quality.

Their nuggets and processed chicken is good, but if I want a drumstick or breast I'd rather go to Popeyes.

why are you posting a panel from toriko

>dude japan and anime are so WEIRD LMFAO look at this game based on FAST FOOD

why are western indie devs so racist towards japan that they constantly treat their scene as a joke when they also constantly rip them off?

seething weeb

Tried it, even from your timestamp, just doesn't work for me.

>Tfw this might become a reality in our lifetime
What a time to be alive

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what's more weeb then drawing western stuff in a generic anime style? this fucking game looks like a how to draw manga book for fuck sake.

a dating sim with kfc could've been kind of funny if it was the actual kfc style instead of "generic anime man who kind of looks like the colonel" but then that wouldn't catch the ironic weeb audience

G-d i wanna fuck Wendy

it's a marketing ploy, obviously

They actually put Chad in the game.

I heard about this earlier today because people said steam had too much shovelware
>was expecting some shit tier shovelware meme game
>it actually looks like it has decent production values
fuck the haters

KFC was always a little bit fucked up. Colonel Sanders used to fund grind house exploration films in the sixties to promote the brand and he'd even do cameos in them.

sauce?
if lolicon don't bother

the difference being that fateshit and all of those porno vn's are made by people who genuinely like what they're making and think its cool

this is made by a fucking advertising company. it's just more ironic bullshit for people who are too cowardly to be honest with themselves about what they're into

>are made by people who genuinely like what they're making and think its cool

Imagine being this much of a retarded weeb that you think this is true.

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It's just corporate meme bait, what's the big deal? Have you guys not seen twitter?

where's this from? I want a tell all documentary on fast food.

Yeah it's straight shota and yuri loli.

you don't write 40 hours of fake mythology and magic rules in fate stay night as a joke, the devs are just into that stupid shit

yikes
thanks for the warning

Nasu hates fate and most circles just pump vn and vn hoping one takes off.
Very small circles actually do passion projects and guess what, you don't play those because they are untranslated due to being shit.

Wikipedia

>yikes
Big homo. It's one of the hottest kemono/furry comics I've read in a while and I'm not a furry.

Cringe

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Superb taste

having a mobile app is the best call to action you can have
>hey here' this discount
>hey here's this new item on the menu
etc. etc.

I don't have any apps because I live in the middle of nowhere but I can see why people would

>Nasu hates fate
which is why he wrote so much stuff for it that it didn't even make it all into the game? we're talking about vn's, not stuff like fgo

>you don't write 40 hours of fake mythology and magic rules in fate stay night as a joke

Yeah, you do it for money. Same as every other dev.

Stephen King hated the Shining movie, but still worked as an advisor when it was made. Money is money user

sauce

Honey mustard

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Yeah because fate is his cash cow. im pretty sure he stopped caring after hollow ataraxia. And the anime was the final nail on its coffin. I'm talking about the DEEN anime.

when writing tsukihime nasu was a goddamn neet who was being fed money by his partner because he thought his stories were really interesting and needed to be shared, with f/sn being wrote only a couple years later

why is the concept of an true indie game being made with a vision behind it so hard for western retards to understand? is it because they're all a bunch of frauds who only got into this scene because they want to be the next undertale and that's why they bitch about stuff like steam not putting their game above the others?

>Yeah because fate is his cash cow. im pretty sure he stopped caring after hollow ataraxia.
which is the last VISUAL NOVEL for fate, in this thread about VISUAL NOVELS why the fuck would you talk about anything else. do you have a disability?

Vietnamese KFC is down right decent

And then he was told to add in a bunch of sex scenes and other shit because otherwise it would not sell.

this shit is a bad meme. if he was "forced" to add them kagetsu tohya wouldn't have one of the loading screen text crawls be gloating about how they added a really "moe moe" threeway sex scene

Sanders was almost kinda cute in his own way, gotta say.
>t.oyajifag

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Is this the opposite of MILF?

You just have daddy issues you skank.

It's obvious that they're hoping a streamer will read it ironically and cause it to start getting attention. It's all just a marketing stunt to get publicity with the weeb and ironic weeb crowd. They probably want it to break out like Katawa Shoujo and DDLC did.

>if he was "forced" to add them kagetsu tohya wouldn't have one of the loading screen text crawls be gloating about how they added a really "moe moe" threeway sex scene

You're so naive it's adorable. I bet you think that when someone resigns in Japan it's because they really wanted to and not because they were forced to do so.

Yes, but instead of mommy milkies its daddy milkies.

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>Church's Chicken just opened up across the street

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And you are so stupid is sad.

don't worry the artist primarily does shota

I'm gonna need some gravy and sauce for that.

based KFC

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Is The Colonel the real life Grandma from Cookie Clicker?

somebody doesn't like when her favorite overrated trash VN gets mocked online!
DDLC was shit kid, now C O P E

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so how much porn are we expecting now

Well, two anons in here said they were making pics. Beyond that, thick girl will probably get a lot of pictures, the best friend will get a few, but both will definitely be getting pictures of them being fucked by Col. Sanders and the dog.

That's pretty funny, still not gonna buy any KFC, it's shit in my country

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i ate kfc once

Tumblr tier art with the bulbous noses and the fucked up anatomy and marfan syndrome fingers to boot. Fuck I hate the art style but at least it serves as a litmus test for whether or not I'll hate someone right off the bat.

As a black weeb I feel amazing about this turn if events

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>blacks

and out

Who do you think eats fried chicken?

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supreme gentlemen ofcourse!

Supporting this will enable more companies to use this strategy. Money makes culture. Soon more companies will pander to weebs, and being a weeb will become more comparable to what happens in japan. And this will attract more anti-tranny sentiment that is being spammed nowadays, quite obvious the discord tranny spam you disgusting abominations have tried in the past weeks.