Can crush stone with a single punch

>can crush stone with a single punch
>breathes fire
>super jumping skills
>really smart and has a huge kingdom behind him
>super rich with all the shit he pulls off
>probably hung as fuck
Why won't peach fuck him lads?

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He smells weird

>Probably hung as fuck
Turtles have massive penises relative to their body, so yeah.
He should try hitting on Daisy for once. She'd probably go for him.

>Why won't peach fuck him lads?
Who cares, i'll do it instead

based

You forgot good father.

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Because he won't just walk up to her and fucking ask probably

Because, user, the chase is ALWAYS better than the catch. She gets off on it, he gets off on it, all at mario's expense. It's no fun giving in willingly because the race is run. All that's left is monotony after the thrill is gone.

>Why won't peach fuck him lads?
better question is why does he even bother?

This
Rosalina probably would have been cool with him had he not broken into her house and stole her lights. Bowser is legitimately a good guy when he's not listening to his dick.