Why Is Samus So Perfect?

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I would eat her ass while I fuck my sister

She looks like she crushes testicles

go to bed spacejin

because she is an enduring icon despite the endless fanservice

Because she loves you, user. She’s out there hunting those bounties to support her family: you and your two darling children. You miss her when she’s away fighting space pirates, but it’s worth it for the time you get to share as a family.

Samus? You mean the power suit wielding galactic savior with badass armor? She's perfect because she knows how to keep her cool when fighting villainous alien monsters, and she's got a variety of kickass moves, and she's starred in many fun games that are almost peak metroid game design.

I don't know what that disgusting piece of shit is in your image though. Some slutty fanart maybe?

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I can imagine

based AChad

Don't care Roid Rage Redfag. Just stay the fuck away from me and my family.

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>Roid Rage Redfag
I don’t get it

>Why yes, I've never played a single samus game and only knew about samus from playing smash bros. I also fap to offmodel images of her. How could you tell?

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Speaking of Metroid, take a look at this. You'll probably have to view the image in a new tab to see the details in full

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Because she was remodeled

chykka larva looks like a dick

You know that if I didn’t post her in zero suit this thread wouldn’t have gotten nearly this many replies

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So you made the image board equivalent of clickbait.

>>>/kotaku/

Probably BECAUSE IT IS A DICK.
Also, for people looking for Meta Ridley, he's under Quadraxis

Looks like mods stopped this thread in their quest for jannies

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She is blonde, she has blue eyes, she has big tits, she has a surprisingly fat backside and her games are really good.

Don't forget the most important thing: she keeps her mouth shut.

Based

Will we ever get a good Metroid game again?

While that is also important, I would argue that Zero Mission revealing to the whole world that Samus had a fat arse was more important. It was such a surprise too, coming from Super Metroid.

Because she's not real, she can remain pure eternally.

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>surprisingly fat backside
Is this just you trying to be edgy or does she actually have a fat ass?

She may have a fat backside, but she'll never have a Dan Backslide

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based

You tell me.

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I always thought she was a man who could summon a lady when I was young.

cause why not have a perfect woman?

Meme not reckognized.

>posts "proof"
>uses modded image

Why do Yea Forums always do this? This an anime fanart that has nothing to do with how she looks officially.

That's an in game screenshot from the Wii U Smash game

Am I being trolled?

Nope

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Don't listen to this idiot, both these images are doctored and it's the same sick fuck who keeps doing it.

Mating press Samus

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Show me the fanfics

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>“Oh, hello Samus, how are you today?, I hope that you’re ready because soon I’ll be there with you again”

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>fanfics
>not the ERP

>being Samus
>your ass is so fat that people don't believe actual screenshots are real

I wonder how she feels. :-(

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Because she is not real.

It's the bird DNA

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Did Zero Mission go too far with the butt size?

strawpoll.me/18568945/

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Samus mating presses YOU

i don't think that she's perfect, op. she's almost there, but her shithole still needs to be remodeled

Literally designed for BBC

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>uses incel terms like mating press
>posts horrible jap drawing
Two for two

Her arse folds more than my jeans after laundry

Burd DNA