I just got this (refreshed) piece of shit of a console yesterday. It has disappointed me in almost every aspect and I am confused as fuck how this isn't another flop like the Wii U.
You pay $299 for a console that has less power than a chink tablet that is going to gouge you for any decent experience at all.
The wifi radio is beyond fucking garbage. Maxing out at 30mbps on fiber right next to the router (all other devices, even the cheap ones get 300+)
The controller is borderline unusable. Playing Tetris (which is the only thing this thing can run without dropping frames) is a fucking nightmare due to the mushy buttons as a replacement from the Road
The screen is a goddamn joke, I've legit bought $99 tablets from AliExpress with fully fine 1080P IPS screens with good colors, this is significantly worse than that
Then let's start about the rucking online "service". Still using God damn friends codes in 2019 with no possible way to message friends. It's ridiculous for a free service, but this isn't a free service. This shit costs too.
You literally have to pay mid range PC prices just to get a decent experience playing fucking Mario. Launch titles are still $60, a viable controller is $80, an adapter for a decent connection is at least $30 with the Nintendo online for $30.
This is the worst fucking thing ive bought in a long damn time.
TL:DR. You're a snoy or Xblock bitch boy who is triggered that Nintendo is still doing Nintendo shit.
>Waaah Nintendo is releasing controllers that don't fit in my manlet hands >Waaah Mario or Zelda is better than my stuff
Go drink some bleach.
Tyler Gutierrez
I like it for the games What all can you do with it when it's hacked?
Parker Mitchell
Post receipt
Nathan Thomas
piracy, custom back-rounds, emulators up to 5th gen, standard stuff also has a Half Life port and android emulation which is more valuable than it sounds
Aiden Adams
Did they ever fix the d-pad on that puppy or should I just buy an adapter to use my Wii U controller?
Gavin Perry
Can I still hack my switch if I updated it and it has an older serial number?
Noah Lopez
You're honestly right about everything but it has games so I don't really mind the shitty hardware.
Owen Cruz
If your switch is an older and unpatched model the firmware doesnt matter
Blake Miller
Why do you keep comparing this to tablets that don't need to run modern games, need smaller batteries and don't need cooling?
Aaron Ross
Because the only way for me to play Doom Eternal at launch without the Devuno meme is through this piece of shit and it grinds my gears
Cooper Gonzalez
>has less power than a chink tablet that is going to gouge you for any decent experience at all.
What are you comparing it to? You realize it's more powerful than almost every tablet right? It didn't flop because you can play it anywhere unlike the Pii U.
>Playing Tetris (which is the only thing this thing can run without dropping frames
Try playing actual first party games like Mario Odyssey and Smash which are locked at 60 aside from stress tests. I won't bring up your other point since you can't help your gorilla nigger hands.
>The wifi radio is beyond fucking garbage. Maxing out at 30mbps on fiber right next to the router (all other devices, even the cheap ones get 300+)
Who the fuck uses this radio on their console? You're nitpicking at this point.
>The screen is a goddamn joke, I've legit bought $99 tablets from AliExpress with fully fine 1080P IPS screens with good colors, this is significantly worse than that
It is a joke but not for the reason you gave. It's 720p because that's the ideal target resolution for playing it in handheld. The plastic screen is shitty but you never brought that up. It's also an IPS screen too and the only real issue with it is the low brightness.
>You literally have to pay mid range PC prices just to get a decent experience playing fucking Mario. Launch titles are still $60, a viable controller is $80, an adapter for a decent connection is at least $30 with the Nintendo online for $30.
Wow... so this is the power of a Pii U owner's buyers remorse. All of this is cheaper than a modern midrange pc which goes for at least $800. The games are also triple A games running on a home console and Smash Bros was literally the best selling fighting game of all time on this hardware. Thanks for beta testing!
Joseph Turner
>bought a Nintendo console for non-indie ports
Your own fault for being a retard. Doom runs at a stable 30 fps too last I checked so if you didn't buy this for portable gaming then I don't know what to tell you.
Ian Smith
>underpowered >gimmick >supposedly a handheld but too large and performs better docked >dock scratches screen >cheap, flimsy joycons >library consisting of rehashes, shovelware, the worst versions of multiplats and kiddie games. >insufferable, delusional community >manchildren love it >system of choice for trannies and the morbidly obese. >smash tournaments known for being comprised of people with no concept of personal hygiene >an embarrassment to be seen playing in public >horrible online, overpriced. >console is overpriced, very low value in general >often referred to as several derogatory names, some examples include “cucktendo shitch” or just “shitch”, “Fischer price tablet” or more rarely the “NINtENDO SWItCH” (the lowercase t’s representing the low testosterone of the typical Nintendo console owner) I could go on but I think we’ve all seen enough to agree that owning a Nintendo Switch is undesirable.
Landon Perez
>double space Didn't read. You're retarded and a fag.
Eli Davis
hey moron, if you don't fucking like the product then fucking get rid of it. go return it to whatever shitty store you bought it from and get your money back.
i swear this board is full of fucking subhuman retards. why would you spend 300+ dollars on anything without doing even the smallest amount of research on what it can do and what features are available? literally everything you've bitched about is freely available knowledge with a quick google search and yet here you are, whining that you bought something that doesn't meet your standards.
i'm aware this is likely yet another shitpost thread, but holy fuck i am so sick and tired of seeing this exact same shitty thread every fucking day. develop higher functioning brain cells and fuck off
Gabriel Perez
>Thanks for beta testing! >the "beta test" was better than the "final product" oh dear, switchfags really didn't think this narrative through.
How can you be this retarded? All of the things you mentioned are well known and people bitch about them all the time on Yea Forums and everywhere else.
Jayden Rodriguez
>why would you spend 300+ dollars on anything without doing even the smallest amount of research on what it can do and what features are available? Simple. So you can bitch about it here and fit in. I mean, do you need any other reason?
Eli Diaz
The best part is how he said it's the only console he can play a triple A multiplat on now. Like literally just keep your PS4? Actual caveman mode.
Christopher Allen
>caring about denuvo So your a retard, got it
Grayson Clark
Why would anyone want to keep around a console with no games
Not even that. Selling consoles is generally a poor way of moving money anyway, as you're always taking a loss (unless you get lucky like with the Wii U at its launch or collector's editions). Even more so if you offload your shit to places like Gamestop.
Jordan Miller
Why do nincels get so fucking angry if you criticize the shitch? Its undeniable how underpowered it is and how bad the controllers are
Juan Cox
Should have done more research before buying then, dummy. Complain more while we enjoy games.
As a nintenfag myself, yeah the joycons suck dick and pro controller is ridiculously overpriced. The Switch is underpowered compared to Xbox One and PS4 but it still gets the job done. It's a small tablet, I think they did the best they could. I only have it for first party exclusives and indie games though. Planning on getting an Xbox One or PS4 for stuff like Doom and other big third party titles. Leaning more towards Xbox because of gamepass. I just wish I had the money for a gaming PC since that'd be ideal.
Jace Moore
It hasn't flopped because Nintendo remembered to market it, and it had a good first year.
Isaiah Scott
>expects to be taken seriously >hyperbole in every point
When is the last time Yea Forums did one of those giant cards? MGSV?
Luke Roberts
it would be nice to see Nintendo actually try for a change in the graphics department, like if they made a console that could actually compete with Microsoft and Sony instead of being the designated kid brother's watered down port machine console.
Jack Lewis
They tried. The Nintendo 64 and the Gamecube got creamed in the marketplace because of it. Never again.
Carter Thomas
Didn't the N64 sell a shitload? Everyone I knew had one. And the gamecube was Nintendo committing to toddlercore, look at that cheap little plastic box. Mario Sunshine and Wind Waker were cartoons for babies.
Adam Murphy
the n64 and gamecube got creamed for retarded decisions that had nothing to do with the graphics. nintendo just wants people to think it was the graphics that made them lose so they can keep cheaping out on hardware.
Aaron Long
Nice blog, bro. I too hate video games and jerk off to my PC specs.
Christopher Harris
I like my Switch and currently playing Dark Souls comfy in bed is a fucking dream.
But OP has it right that the technical state of the console is a travesty >battery life that makes you wonder how this got approved >wifi range is abysmal >some models can hear fan static through headphones, others zap users when connected to power >joycons have wiggle room when attached and aren't locked >HD rumble is noisy as hell >missing basic online functions like friend messaging or sharing screenshots This whole thing feels like a chinese knock-off. If it wasn't Nintendo but Nvidia or AMD stuff, people would trash it to the moon.
