Hi. I would like a sword that compensates for my small penis

>thinking about dicks when you see a weapon
gamer

Hello I would like a sword resembling my circumcised penis

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>hi I would like... wow a poleaxe! how could you tell?

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>average white male

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be the 40%

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Imagine the shame if this was your son

FE
FI
FO
FUM
I SMELL THE BLOOD OF
CASUL SCUM

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>Why yes I am a boring rank and file peasant, how could you tell

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*Japanese drum sounds*
YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

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Why East Asia can't into double-bladed swords?

Why is it that claw weapon users will be either the best player you've ever seen, or the worst scrub you've ever seen.

There are no average clawfags.

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What is the point of claw weapons when any other weapon has a reach advantage over it, not to mention you can't block anything with them?

Why would you compensate for somerhing that's inherently superior?

>hi. I would like a sword that represents my small penis.

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this except spelt properly with two ll's

In video games, claws are usually good at disarming your enemy or parrying their attacks.

Also, there's an inherent style factor.

>he doesn't know how to block with claws

Let's be honest: Who DOESN'T like penises? Humanity literally worships the phallus. Why do you think every nation tries to build the tallest phallic-shaped building?

You can climb trees.

to be seen for miles, to reach the heavens, to emulate big trees? there are plenty of other explanations other than your cock worship fetish, user

>lol dude tall things are inherently phallic
you've spent too much time in sociology classes

What's the point of double edged swords?

>hi I would llike... wow a polleaxe! how coulld you tell?

>WHAT'S GOOD NIGGA?

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Based blacks purifying the white genepool

For me? It's the kanabo

Could you imagine doing a low horizontal swing and getting that spike in between someones ribs.
I bet it would feel good to do.

>hi. I would like a sword that complements my large penis

Balanced weight distribution
Better thrusting/stabbing
Either edge can be used

It’s a counterweight.

thrusting. the truth is ancient Japan was pretty retarded, pure traditionalism. even the closest thing to katanas the west ever made had double-sided tips

>tell

mordhau gives you the option to hold it like this

tell already has two lls

>hi. I want a sword that's going to tell the man im gonna fuck his wife after i kill him

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>weebs getting dunked on constantly by anyone with actual weapon knowledge

one of the things that happens constantly on the internet that still entertains me to this day.

Hell even in sekiro the western dude in full plate is completely immune to your katana, and its hilarious.

I fucking hate games that involve finding a magical weapon. Strength should lie within the person wielding the weapon, not the weapon itself.

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penis envy filled idiot females interpret literally anything with one dimension longer than its others as 'phallic'. they've pushed this meme out to their crypto-female faggots/male-feminists. females, not even once.

then doublle it

to be fair curved swords themselves aren't as dumb as katanas

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The truly retarded thing about the katana is.
>two handed grip
>but with only the blade length of a one handed arming sword.

They can, Japanese have the tsurugi and Chinese have the jian.

Nobody with a small dick could wield that heavy ass thing and swing it.

zweihänder are peak masculinity you dex sympathising bastard

Is the double bladed two handed axe the only non-faggy two-hander invented?

I think most katanas in media that people end up liking are actually nodachi length, but they never learn the difference.

personally i feel all curved blades are retarded because your removing the ability to do the only attack that matters in actual combat.

My favorite part of the whole katana mythos is that in reality the were flimsy pieces of shit that couldnt cut through anything thicker that poorly treated leather, so in fantasy they are super sharp and can cut anything because folded 1000000000 times

the 2nd blade is useless weight

That's not the rapier, in fact zweihander is the most based sword and you can't fight with a zweihander then you are a massive faggot.

Japanese invented police batons and flyswatters?

Seething Pike fag
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zweihänder
>Application

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Double headed axes were ceremonial.

>you don't have to worry about openings if you just kill everyone in a 5 meter radius

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Maybe for baby men

>flail

someone tell him

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Whatever dude, why don't you go back to fairyland.

are all zweifags giantdad memers? Zweihander in DaS1 was a pve weapon, you'd get fucking parried for days using it in pvp

no one ever used two-headed axes for anything other than chopping down trees

Something like the Kilij can still thrust though

>mfw I got into Smithing and watched lots of videos and shit about it
>learned that hitting the sword with the hammer compresses the metal
>that makes it less flexible and more rigid
>katans were folded so many times they were (in comparison to an ELS or a ZH) like glass and would shatter instantly after extended use (r. more than 10 swings)

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The Kriegmesser is the most powerful form of the Katana.

Longsword in every DaS game is the true top tier

You could also dead angle scrubs in PvP, sure it was not top tier in PvP but one could manage.

>>katans were folded so many times they were (in comparison to an ELS or a ZH) like glass and would shatter instantly after extended use (r. more than 10 swings)
You retards are just as bad as the weebs

>rapierwimps still seething

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>why yes, my penis is 15 inches long, what gave it away?

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Now it's up to you to make a katana that actually lives up to the reputation.

Their access to iron was absolute dogshit and they had to make due with it.

>I would like to get paid double the normal fee by breaking pikeman formations and inspiring the troops being an absolute chad
fixed that or you OP

Wrong

This entire thread proves my point that HEMAfaggots are just idiot contrarian children who watch youtubers and pretend to know "real swordsmanship"

>flails

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while true, makes no excuse for the fact jap military tactics were borderline retarded.

they didnt even use shields for fucks sake.

but you cant parry UGS attacks

imagine not being a Zweichad

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Bro
It's not difficult to understand
>hit metal
>it gets smaller but weighs the same
>it's denser
>it becomes more rigid
>the more rigid the blade, the easier it is to shatter
>thousand-folded swords got hammered like 1000000 times
>they are super rigid and brittle

implying maulchad would touch a poleaxe

>thousand-folded swords
well that's just laughably wrong.

>"swordsmanship"
Nigger I have never attacked someone with a sword in my life
I watched like 20+ hours of forging and listened to the guys explaining the process
I'm a fucking smithing retard and I can tell you that folding the metal 1000 or even 100 times will make the blade very very brittle and rigid

thisbut also you have more follow up options and attack options because you don't need to take the time to rotate the blade completely to get an edge on strike. because there are two edges you only need to rotate partially, or sometimes not at all, to do a followup strike.

you could argue that double bladed swords are quicker in terms of followup and successive blows because of this.

In DaS1 you could, in DaS3 you could just reaction roll every UGS

REAL chads go into battle with ceremonial weapons

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>I'm a fucking smithing retard and I can tell you that folding the metal 1000 or even 100 times will make the blade very very brittle and rigid
Which is expressly why no one, ever, actually did that.

>convienient censorship pillar

>not the joyeuse

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Are you saying they didn't heat treat the sword after forging it?

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Oh my god
Excuse me while I go kill myself for thinking that weebs were being literal about the 1000 folds
Jesus christ i'm a fucking retard

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dilate

>Which is expressly why no one, ever, actually did that.

the japanese absolutely did and still do. the reason for doing so is to pound out impurities however, because they had shit quality steel.

if you already have a high quality steel to begin with then folding is not necesarry.

Not really

Rotating a blade takes zero effort or even thought, it's you natural and I have seen most people do it unconsciously even with double bladed weapons

The actual amount people meme about is still pretty exaggerated.

>the japanese absolutely did and still do.
The actual number of times was in the range of 8 to 16 you retard.

seething dex fags and int builds are already btfo because low HP means they get 1HKO'd

I was under the impression that he was implying no folding was done at all. but yeah its over exaggerated

Folding isn't even what defines katanas. What's different about them is using using two types of metals.

Katanas are basically just very sharp hotdogs. No wonder americans love them so much.

kek

>yes I chose the tetsubo how could you tell?

The horns and the red skin gave it away.

Silence dagger nigger

Weren't they also typically used as a backup or for a duel anyways? IMO swords in general are a bit overrated.

Swords are the handguns of pre-modern warfare.

Whatcha mean?

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Because with claws, either they stun lock / combo you to death, or they get fucked because they don't know how to close the game.

It's not fair bros this person looks good as a man and a women.

love these medieval threads

Be gone Daniel

Everyone owns one and acts tough, or they're civilian-tier? To my understanding spears and axes were more readily available, cheaper to make, and typically given to your average grunt. Swords were sort of a backup, or in some countries a ceremonial thing. Vikings especially treated swords as status symbols.

>Not being a noble lancer.
Shiggy

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>yes I'm an archer how could you tell?

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Watch this.

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>What's best for just absolutely murdering the FUCK out of whatever's in front of me.
>No I don't care for tact or style
>Yeah this works!
Name a more Chad weapon than anything from the club family

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>no hand guard

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Why yes i like to make Westerner faggots seethe how did you found out?

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During actual warring periods though your average Katana was much longer than it was later on. The Katana people think of was just a status weapon during a relative time of peace.

>that makes it less flexible and more rigid
>katans were folded so many times they were (in comparison to an ELS or a ZH) like glass and would shatter instantly after extended use (r. more than 10 swings)
but that's wrong you faggot.
The point of folding is to remove impurities, without folding you have a bunch of iron and other minerals inside your steel. Folding is the only way the Japanese had of removing those impurities.
Also hitting it more doesn't cause it to be less flexible and rigid just because you're hitting it more. Its because of oxidation.

tachi's were cool, bring em back.

based

>knigga

Don't mind me, just single handedly changing the course of war for thousands of years.

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what type of pollaxe is best, one with an axe and hammer, or a hammer and hook, etc

>Kill a person
>Go to prison like a dumb nigger.
You never stomp the face, go for the stomach it'll keep them down longer.

sike

I have that exact morningstar, it was very poorly made
shaft, and head are completely hollow, and all of the spikes are screw-on

GUESS I NEED TO MAKE MY OWN

That's a boar spear.
It's for hunting, you know, wild boars.

drill bit > oyster

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>charges into spike wall trap

Pole axe chads, where we at?

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Kanabo master race

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>Hi i would like a sword that allows me to cleave assholes apart

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"Properly"

It's one way to hold it out of a couple it was designed for

for me it goes Pollaxe>Grosse/Kriegsmesser>Warhammer>Literally everything else.

but that's not a person

>STRfags think they're like Guts
>they dont realise that Guts is actually a cheat build with everything maxed

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Guts is a quality build, it's not cheats just pure erectness.

Not really.

If it were dark souls.

Max hardcap str
enough end to fast roll on heavy armor ( maybe rings to compensate this)
High poise
High vit
enough dex to wield ranged weapons
enough attunement for power within move

Nothing broken about this.

>rolls straight 18s across the board
>thinks he's a str build

well realistically speaking you don't need much to cleave assholes apart because assholes are a very soft and vulnerable piece of flesh.

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>gif
why

He was out spreading the word of Jesus. Go church erry sunday need more money for dem programs.

meme aside,why stab a man ass ? like if he wanted to kill him stab him in the back or in the neck,why the ass and why infront of his child?

See

Perfect rogue weapon, blunt for when you just want to knock them out but not cause anything permanent, pointy bit for backstabs and crippling, and if he's smart he can always have better leverage holding it than who ever had been holding it first.

Swords aren't very good for that purpose.
You generally use either a "medicinal dildo" or some absolutely hopeless beta orbiter from hell.

God I love the Kanabo. It's just a straight u[ beatstick.

China did, Japanese warfare evolved in a way that made them unnecessary.

You forgot the part where he has attack speed hacks and can swing the dragon slayer around like its a regular sword

The face is well protected though, real weak points are neck and ribs

Ekuchads rise up.

That Furi boss that used it was kino

I like how literally half the weapons is like farm/hunting or industral/artisanal equipment of the time and then the other half is military grade weapons of the time.

That's just an oar, Musashi. Quit playing around.

Yeah, it's an oar, and for me, nothing could be better.

>personally i feel all curved blades are retarded because your removing the ability to do the only attack that matters in actual combat.
Curved blades were able to get around shields better and also they were less likely to get stuck in something as you slashed people or horses as opposed to a straight blade.

Is it weird that I know that's a coloured in version of the weapons section in the D&D 3.5 edition players handbook?

user, that's not how real life works.
A hammer like that with such a small contact area is going to cause serious injury if you hit someone with it, and even weapons specifically designed to knock the victim out like a blackjack are still more than capable of causing permanent brain damage.

>The face is well protected though
>lose consciousness, sinus fill up with blood
>drown
>temples gets smashed
>die of aneurysm
>heads gets stomped
>base of the skull gets detached from the spine
>technical decapitation
>gets stomped in the back of the head
>brain stem gets crushed
The head is one of the most vulnerable part of the human body. Its the biggest weak point any martial arts instructor or medical expert would point out.

2% of white males and 5% of black males are homosexual.

imagine just going about your day and some nigger stabs you in your fucking colon

Ye if the guy is unconscious and cant move, but if he isnt then his reflexes will make him show the harder part of the face towards danger like the forehead and the cheekbones

So, pick for backstabs, hammer for crippling, and blackjack at the pub?

Swords are for retards. Real chads use spears or poleaxes.

That's why it gets sandwiched in a softer steel sheath.

t. seething pikenigger

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Best polearm coming through

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>Cold Steel

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Does this better suit your taste, user?

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When white boys transition they are legally female and considered straight

He's a nigger.

Trannies get send to male prison so apparently not.

You all make me sick

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The only viable weapon in mordhau is the hoe, pickaxe is for when you want to get your shit pushed in because no reach.

What's mordhau?

>not using a dagger to get used to an underpowered weapon then switch to a normal weapon to decimate anyone easily

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Based and redpilled

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ideal sword length is to stand the blade on the ground and have the hilt reach your upper chest.