Give me your stupid headcanons, Yea Forums. The dumber, the better

The CEO of Falcom self-inserts himself into the role of every male protagonist he creates, which is why even long running series have crossovers which degenerate into harem scenarios.

Teemo and Kennen are boyfriends!

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Remy is totally Charlie or Guile's GI baby.

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Mario fucks. Hard.

Yea Forums actually like videogames

Hamsters are the best
I like you user

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I always thought it would be cool if the half life "spoilers" about a Dyson sphere were real and the game series ends for good with Gordon finding the portal gun which can open portals by using moon rocks to portal the moon or some other cdlestial body into the sphere itself with Gordon watching from an extreme distance as the sphere collapses from all that mass instantly hitting the star the sphere surrounds. Were it the moon I think it would be really cool if the games ended with earth totally devastated without even a moon for tides and gordon and the others having no idea what to do and having possibly doomed themselves in their flailing desperation to destroy the combine. Sort of a destroy the game rather than lose to it moment like macready from the thing.

Prototype and infamous are in the same universe but years apart

Literally one of the most garbage pets you can have. I've had several growing up and they just do jack shit and die in two years.

Sakura was a Terminator from 2999 with orders to kill and rape all the humans/demons/jews in the world.

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All the bad futures in Sonic CD are made by Robotnik, but so are the good futures. At some point Sonic convinces him to give up evil and he uses his technology for the benefit of others. Stardust Speedway is the primary attraction at Eggman Land.

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Elisa Cassan hacked into Adam's robot bits and the two had mindsex

spike from ape escape and kat from gravity rush are a couple

Nuclear Throne is Hotline Miami 3, taking place in the wasteland left after the nuclear holocaust that wiped out most of the world at the end of of Hotline Miami 2.

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Guild Wars 2 was a joke taken too far.

Duke Nukem never killed a single alien. His father was a space explorer with mild combat experience, but because he went spelunking a lot, he managed to acquire a debt for his son. Duke Nukem 3D is the pitifully disillusioned fantasy of a trust fund baby hopped on drugs thinking the world owes him shit, when he's just a loser living in a studio in LA off of his father's inheritance. Duke Nukem Forever's intro is important because it shows him in his dad's house using that money to hone in on this fantasy, before delving back into psychedelics and convincing himself he's a hero, when not even his dead father was anyone to write home about.

Other miscellaneous ones:
>DoomGuy's was an incel and was forced to stay back for fear he'd hurt another one of his crew; imagines alien soldiers as his crewmates out of spite
>Ranger (Quake guy) is canonically able to rocket jump, and has used it as a party trick to get women to fuck him back home
>Postal Dude, James from Manhunt, and the guy from Hatred are all siblings
>Gordon Freeman was literally a mute, and because he kept quiet on Black Mesa's bigger tech, he earned respect from his peers (Stole this from OneyPlays actually)
>All female FPS characters wield guns that are designed to have zero recoil, or else they would be winded after two shots
>Every Call of Duty game occurs in the same one-year span, and Soap and Ghost are the only recurring factors to support this
>CS:GO is a modern-day equivalent to the WWI Christmas Truce story, replacing soccer balls with video games

Highly underrated post

the Nu in chrono trigger are actually the little battle pets from the minigame in the DS version, just sent into the wild and allowed to mature

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All inkling ink is produced upon orgasm
Every time there's a match, inklings have to spend time masturbating in the locker rooms to fill up tubs of ink, or if the team is closely bonded, they may even masturbate each other, or have sex to help their orgasms produce more ink. When the teams are shown at the beginning of the game, I like to imagine how they orgasmed before the match. It makes it more fun to think some of them might be more introverted and fap alone in a cubicle, and others might be more bonded and have cute sex.

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You are actually autistic, please see a doctor

Then how do they replenish it immediately by diving into it?

ye- uh... you know uh-... one thing I-...

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People in the Mega Man universe keep making robots despite the fact that it's almost always gone wrong because they're all really stupid

that's not really even just a headcanon at this point

I like to think that a version of me is successful with a well adjusted life in a parallel word and i feel good about my otherself

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In the Smash Mansion, Rosalina acts as a mother figure to all of the young characters. Kirby, Lucas, Young Link, etc.

does she fuck them?