CRASH NITRO FUELED THREAD

Join me in the new trend; Dabbing on Motorsport Tawna's

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>leave lobby because of shit votes
>get put back in same lobby but somehow a decent map was chosen

I beat a crunchfag with Liz today. Feels good

I see a ton of people judging Digital Tropies but I'm able to play normal Tropy without seeming like I'm flexing right?
I just like him and Trance since N. Tranced was my first crash game.

Damn, care to explain whats going on here? I dont think we ever did anything like that among my friends in original CTR.

It worked in CTR, they just altered it to not kill your boost, which is one of the few things CNK did that was cool

I like this hair way more

Play Digital Tropy and don't act like a bitch because you're tropy, thats why people turned on him.

Angle the jump and air brake, super easy guy.

im not gonna make it.... i cant believe im not gonna make it.... go on without me you guys......

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Ocelot Liz is GOAT. Only reason you hate her is because you're a meta cuck

As long as you're not a ragequitting pussy, you can use whatever character you want. Who cares anyway?

Crunch is literally as bad though?

Dude, didn't Beenox say that the skin and Tawna would be available from the pit stop at a later date? Chill Frog boi

My wife hates Mondays!

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Who are the "Based" characters in this game anyway?

this

she's one of the best

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FUCK Cortex Castle's platinum relic. Motherfucking N Gin Labs which you all hype up to be impossible was easier than this

Not so much characters, but certain skins

Anything with an arrogant as fuck podium animation or in-race dialogue

Woah

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Whoever you like to play as, fag

I disagree only because I beat Cortex Castle
I can't even come close to beating N Gin Labs

N Gin, Oxide, Papu Papu, and Pinstripe respectively.

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>beating anyone with a speed character
>taking skill
Use turning characters

This None of these And this right fucking here. Speed and Accel are the fucking easy characters to win with.

lol no

You CANNOT dispute this

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Give me a second and i will.

she looks like that twisted steve edit

>Skunk Crash
>bad
Coldsteel Crash is actually refreshing

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She has mom energy

Honestly better.

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*ahem*

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I dont know what I was thinking, he shouldn't have been F, B-C tier

Wasnt the new update supposed to come out today?

Why did you put four Ami's in Sapphire and any Coco above FFF? Thanks for the template btw.

>start to get decent at powersliding
>play tracks that need u-turning to keep the speed
>fat finger the inputs every time and lose reserves
I suck

Inbred goblin isnt wife material.

He's gonna say it

To be fair, most of Coco is in F tier

Only one I agree on

Threadly reminder that Dingodile is best boy
Followed closely by Ripper Roo

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It is, and maybe even Ami being in Sapphire I could accept if I didn't see a million of her.

She's cute!

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>Oxide Station
>get shit on by items in the first half of the lap and fall back to 6th
>literally 3 warp orbs going off every other second
>get a clock
>make my way up to 4th-3rd
>watch for 1st place
>activate clock when they hit the long space jump
>they fall
>steal first
>they rage quite immediately
That's how it starts Beenox. The rage, the fever, the feeling of powerlessness that turns good men... cruel.

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God damn I hate getting clocked at the exact worst point in the track

Makes it feel like a water lap desu

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Nah.

FUCK THE ACCELERATION CLASS AND WAIFU FAGS

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She was unlucky in being the first character unlocked, so all the shitters play as her, by the time the next one rolls around, everyone will be baby coco or whatever.

Barafags get the guillotine.

Based Roo chad

>Playing Adventure on Hard
>CPUs get fucking Warp Orbs
I thought they weren't supposed to? It's happened twice now

characters I don't lose against
i.e non-Speed characters or papu papu

>he doesn't main ami

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>finally getting around to doing time trials
>smoke most of the N Tropy ones no problem, but struggle big time on a few tracks
>despite handily beating Tropy on most of the tracks, the majority of my times came nowhere close to Oxide's times
>finally realize that I wasn't completely optimizing all of my speed boosts
>end up smoking Oxide on the first seven tracks so far

is this what it feels like to git gud?

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I'm not a bottom of the barrel faggot

Is it me or are her thighs thicker here?

>not saving it for the big drop after the space jump so they are sent backwards through the lap
weak shit, desu. be more mean

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I love when Ripper Roo turns round and laughs at the start of the race

Best girl.

Big Norm

only in hard mode, have fun

impossible!

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I don't know how to make webms
twitter.com/BangeSnuskuk/status/1150927450626502657

I nearly woke up my neighbors laughing out loud at 2am in the night when this happened

I miss his insane laughter from the original, but it’s actually kinda cute in this one so it’s not too bad a trade off.

Yeah, I think this GP is wearing me thin a bit.

I'm maining her for the time trials only because I don't like the other speed characters, but otherwise I'm a Crash main all the way

>tfw no Sly Cooper game starring Ami

Football Tiny is Tiny's best skin, people just haven't realized yet

Oh god

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Majestic.

Upload that shit to tier maker I ain't spending an hour in paint. Here's mine, but just for the legendary skins

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Same, I think at first I was worried I wouldn't be in the top 5%, so I ended up playing a couple of hours a night to make sure I wasn't getting left behind, but in reality it's not that hard to maintain as long as you check up every couple of days or so. like the idea of an exclusive item for top players, but this GP was mostly about grinding rather than skill. I know thats because they want people to keep playing their game, but I would have much rather a skill based goal over a play everyday kind of thing

post loadouts

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>*Turns around and looks at Megumi
>*Laughs
Roo is such a based ass character

Holy shit

I tried, the website just crashes my browser each time

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Is Crash an attractive guy for the bandicoot ladies?

fuck you stupid bimbo

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Good feeling right?

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>dnf everyone on tiger temple with the new exploit
>megumifag adds me and calls me a scrub

lmao

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Anyone looking to complete the friend nitro challenge on Switch? Add me.

SW-6056-6014-4824

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They just find his optimism endearing

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>Grand Prix
You think the name would imply a race or two. Hopefully they change how they do things on the next one, people were either getting burnt out or using that stupid controller to farm for nitro. Wasn't handled well to say the least, but keep up on the leaderboard. I plan on shitposting more than actually using that dumb ass cart.

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kek

>get blue orb and uka mask 3 times in a row on oxide station
>throw the orb away the moment I get hit to be a good sport about it but it keeps happening
I'm sorry what the fuck

Congrats user!

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I think he's the only one. I mean there is fake Crash and Crunch, but he seems like he's more into gym dudes. Guess it's
good being the hero.
Got called a tryhard once. I think it's silly. Like that's gonna ruin my day or something?

ye

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This is unironically killing the game. There is too large of a gap among players within any given race lobby. When even second place is unable to finish the race due to time cutoff, people are going to start dropping the game.

pretty cathartic considering I didn't think I'd be able to do it. only hard part imp is maintaining SF/USF on certain tracks, but I'm feeling motivated now

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Fact: anyone who hates Ami is a contrarian faggot

pcshitter here

jelly as fuck, not gonna lie

Or they'll consider the next option with the money they spent: playing Time Trial and getting good like everyone else.

YUHHHHHH GUHHH HOO WAAAAUWWWOOOOHHOOO

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FUCK RED BEAKERS
U
C
K

R
E
D

B
E
A
K
E
R
S

>platinum relics
eat my shit naughty dog fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuckyo uf fuack you fuck uo

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tawna have something to say

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It is until you realize Oxide is a fucking scrub and a lot of his times can be blown the fuck out with even mediocre play. The real challenge is the platinum relics

>That Megumi
WE

You know that won't happen. Only a handful of autists care enough to learn these weird tricks

There's nothing that can be done about that besides people getting better at the game
The problem is that they refuse to do that

Part of it is people not learning the mechanics or tracks, another part is how players use items. Fight your instincts to fuck over people in your immediate vicinity, try to fuck over first place.

>Not getting any matches on Switch
w0w

This.

What's the point of Fake Crash now that the real Crash is a retard?

>Get Crash Cove online
>Have to come in 8th as one of my placements for the challenge
>Decide to go backwards and start hitting people with an Uka Uka mask
Holy shit this is the most fun I've had with this game in two weeks

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I'll leave any lobby with a digital tropy in it unless I'm planning to disconnect farm for money. I won't leave for regular tropy players though.

Crash is the good, kindhearted retard whose kept in line by Coco and reminded to do the right thing by Aku Aku
Fake Crash is the unmoderated retard left to run wild and cause chaos in the world

Based Tawna poster

That's bullshit..

Any drawfags around?

youtube.com/watch?v=wpmFEk9qMd4
Just like the old days

People are dropping the game already just look how easy it is to be 5% no one is bothering to build up Nitro or trophies save for a small group. Activision were legit retards for adding grinding to a kart game and even worse adding cups that require you to grind out repetitive tasks to "keep the game alive" shit people would already be playing if it was good, only a bad game needs stuff like that to keep it alive.

At this point, I want Yaya Panda and Visicount in just for completions sake.

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Being 2nd and having USF speed means nothing if the player in 1st has USF speed and gets even a bit of distance between them. None of the weapons that 2nd place gets can realistically ensnare 1st place other than leaving a trap for the next lap and hoping some retard doesn't drive into it and also hoping that 1st is retarded enough to drive into it.
Orbs do nothing but fuck everyone on their way to 1st if they ever catch 1st. And 1st has enough time to break a ton of boxes and hope for a powershield or mask to get away without punishment.
Clocks just fuck everyone and that doesn't help unless the idiot that got one actually times it to fuck over 1st place specifically.
The mechanics simply favor a rich-get-richer style of approach and unfortunately there aren't nearly good enough catchup mechanics when your max speed isn't even able to close the gap unless 1st just fucks up a turn or jump.

GOOOOOD MORNING Yea Forums! just wanted to remind that Ami (yes, THE Ami from CTR on the PS1) will contenue to dominate online lobbys!
>"B-but the month is almost over, she will be gone soon!

"No."

Considering the next grand prix is babies, and Ami has her sex appeal and her speed, and no sign of a pretty newcomer in sight, you won't have to say goodbye anytime soon!

I really think this game needs a tutorial on boost reserves/air braking and other mechanics needed to beat N. Oxide times
I already platinumed the game but too many people struggle because the game doesn't explain the mechanics

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all versions of cococ are bad

You realize not everyone playing the game is playing it online right

I just had this shit with a Penta and the fucking tongue animation ended me

I remember trying to do a MK7 Yea Forumseekend a couple of weeks back to see if people would join, but in the end no one showed up. Guess everyone sold their copy already. Sadly.

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Of course but the game is specifically angled to online and the nitro leaderboard contains all players while the trophy leaderboard is online only with Nitro being the easiest to 5%. The drop off has been pretty large already and it's going to get bigger with the next cup because no one wants to do this shit again unless Activision really changes how coins and nitro are earned or at least how much of it you get.

28473/42000
there's no way I'm going to be able to unlock Motorsport Tawna in time is there?

Boost reserves are simple enough to understand and you can get used to powersliding fast but air braking and u-turning are hell.

I still have mine

>The mechanics simply favor a rich-get-richer style of approach and unfortunately there aren't nearly good enough catchup mechanics when your max speed isn't even able to close the gap unless 1st just fucks up a turn or jump.
Yeah, in a nutshell the mechanics are fun for time trials, but hopelessly broken for online play. I don't know how one would even try to make online work better, without just removing infinite boosts. And no, matchmaking doesn't fix the inherent issues either, one lucky guy will still always get away when he doesn't get hit by something

This game won't have long term appeal to anybody who doesn't enjoy practicing the advanced mechanics (which are never explained in the game anyway) for their own sake

You definitely have time to unlock her. It took me 9 days to unlock her.

considering you'll get 1000-1400 Nitro Points per day, it's going to be close i think

>Being 2nd and having USF speed means nothing if the player in 1st has USF speed and gets even a bit of distance between them
It means everything. Start driving better than them and start actually racing, at speeds where margin for error is actually a thing.

USF is much easier to fuck up because this game is harder to control than the original. Every second an optimal line is not being taken is massive. I've won a SHITLOAD of races because I overtook 1st with USF after they fucked up.

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Do you like my little beach?

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You got about two weeks left, doing all of the Dailies and Quick challenges nets you roughly 1500 a day or almost 2000 if you max out the potential of Nitro from using the boosting items (characters, karts, wheels, etc)
You can make it

>This game won't have long term appeal to anybody who doesn't enjoy practicing the advanced mechanics (which are never explained in the game anyway) for their own sake
Keep coping, the original held most of us here for 20 years and this plays largely the same.

If you don't want the pleasure of constantly setting new times with new characters and learning new things, then a racing game is not for you. CTR actually does that part just as well as any racing game if not better.

This

My point was moreover that in 2nd place in that position, literally the only thing you can do is take an optimal line and HOPE that 1st place fucks up so you can close the gap.
The reality is that 3rd and 4th are usually close enough to 2nd that the three of them are caught in an item hell where none of them are able to break away from the melee and all the meanwhile 1st place is just making his lead even stronger so that even if he gets conga combo'd by a warp ball from literally every other racer he's still got a comfortable lead.
Being slowed even a little is a death sentence in a close race because once you've fucked that up, that's it. And there are far more things gunning for 2nd place than there are gunning for 1st. The Warp Orb is the most disgusting because it'll incidentally hit 2nd place instead of intentionally, and the distance made between 2nd and 1st becomes insurmountable because 1st place is still cruising along just fine (and this gets exacerbated when USF speeds are involved). Unlike 1st place, 2nd place also has to deal with 1st place putting hazards in the optimal lines so your sentiment of "just drive better" doesn't even work provided that 1st place is also driving well.

Living in a foreign country and my import just came, how long do I have to unlock everything in this GP

ADD ME NIGGERS

SW-6056-6014-4824

You pretty much said exactly what I just said. No, normal people have not been doing time trials for 20 years. People who enjoy that will keep playing, but people who are just looking for some fun kart racing will stop playing soon. We'll see this next month since this basically has a player counter in the nitro leaderboard. This months there's been almost a million people who played this on PS4, in a month that number will be significantly lower

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Are you okay

Why?

Play on a few weekends and you should have enough coin to unlock most of the GP items in the store

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What the fuck is happening, coco park gets voted and it plays another map and pinstripe instantly wins after everyone disconnects, what the hell is going on!?

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I really enjoy seeing shit like this. I want to play with people better than me so I can learn something and beat their ass with it.

>tfw have been grinding on a pirated copy since release
>when I'm finally decent and get the game I'm gonna be unable to get all the content that's being pushed now
I hope some of them stays on the shop.

>Come in 1st on Hyper Spaceway
>Turns out the host left the race midway
o-oh

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HOW DO YOU DO THAT SHIT

Whaaat? The race isn't rigged

That's ridiculous though.

And even if that's true, those people shouldn't be paired with those who can do those tricks in online lobbies.

This game has a skill floor that is super low while also having a skill ceiling that is super high (for a kart racer).

This creates a huge disparity among the people that play the game. And having shitty online lobbies that mix these skill levels highlights the problems.

If people were matches properly, it would be less of a deal. But the grinding would still fuck people over. No way is your average player going to be in the top 5% of anything.

SO FAST

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>You pretty much said exactly what I just said. No, normal people have not been doing time trials for 20 years.
No I actually put things pretty clearly. The only reason you wouldn't enjoy practicing deep mechanics is because you don't enjoy racing games. That's actually the only decider here if there was one. You can cut the bad faith argument shit.

>Finally got Motorsports Tawna
>Don't have to give a shit about nitro grinding anymore
I don't care about the babies coming out next month

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>Being slowed even a little is a death sentence in a close race because once you've fucked that up, that's it
Especially in this game, because of the dependency on blue fire boosting. If you get thrown out of it for any reason, you're essentially stuck in second gear until you get to a specific spot of the track. You can't catch up to somebody going full speed, because you can't even get to full speed

Baby T is gonna be the same as Tawna

>And having shitty online lobbies that mix these skill levels highlights the problems
This. Today I was put into a lobby with 3 fucking Tropys. It was so fun knowing that not only was the race going to be over before I finish my last lap but that 2nd and 3rd place were instantly lost to me and I wasn't wrong, that's exactly how it went except everyone unloaded their weapons on me on the last lap because I was 4th and the closest they could get to so I finished 6th. I hate online.

when tho

This. The fact that they state NOTHING about what reserves are is ridiculous. You see people in these threads all the time asking what USF is and how to get it and how to hold it. And this is on Yea Forums, imagine any 14 year old booting up this game because it was his dad's favourite and getting BTFO and having no idea what to do to improve.

You learn how to powerslide, great. You can do it three times in a row. Great. That's the extent that you really know.

And no, people won't just magically figure out USF on their own or how to keep it.

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I hope they add those vehicles the CNK bosses drove whenever they add Cool Velo

cute

I was literally 11 when I mastered sacred fire.

Come the fuck on.

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>tfw I wont get motor sport tawna because I have job that sends me off to remote locations for days at a time
At least knowing this releases me from the grind.

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>Getting beat by AI fuhggetaboutit
You don't deserve to wear that skin.

You can always buy it later

>Best girl isn't even in the game yet

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Aku/Uka explain it to you during Adventure mode. As well as the loading screens having tips. I figured this shit out as an 11 year old with the original. Get good or get lost.

>boost
>boost disappear

>boost a lot
>boost doesn't disappear

WOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWW

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This is totally different from other racing games. Kart racers are inherently different from normal racing, and CTR stand out from other kart racers. If somebody likes sim racers, it doesn't mean they will spend time learning esoteric techniques and skips in this. I do enjoy that stuff, but I know I'm an outlier

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they did? prove it then

>I figured this shit out as an 11 year old with the original
The original didn't have the same system, you lost USF instantly if you did any other kinds of boosts in CTR

Hold down when you start braking, it's like u-turns in the air except you're on the ground

Feels good to lose 3 races in a row by getting hit by invisible poison bottles, I love it.

strawpoll.me/18319527
every thread

forward throwing seems to be homing towards nearby players for now

Maybe your just bad?

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She just wanted Crash's bandicock, that was her entire character

Second place was far behind

I just LOVE being hit by bombs that I thought I fucking dodged

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then how the hell did he catches up with you

This guys knows the truth

Now you's on MY time!

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After every race in Adventure mode either of the masks pops up and gives you tips. You have to physically push triangle twice to make them stop.

>remote detonates in your path

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>implying it wasn't rigged from the start

Lost usf, and fell in the void

i know that, just give me the time they specifically explains about USF and reserves

Hey retard, they never explain airbrakes, reserves, and pivot turns. Only the core mechanics of how to play the fucking game.

Playing with a group of players where everyone knows what they're doing and are on point. Top 3 places areess than a second apart.
This is new

ah yes the green beaker-turbo pad camouflage combo, my favourite kind of trap

Not him, but I was trying to figure this out as well, you need to let go of acceleration if you couldn't figure that out Like me

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>people seriously think invisible items and walls screwing you over mean you're "bad"

or maybe the game's just broken and needs to be fixed

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???
It wasn't even on a pad, it's never on the fucking pad, it's always in the middle of the road, completely invisible or else I wouldn't complain.

You know what TIME it is!

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Fixing the racism is more important than fixing the game.

oh hey im playing against you

alright i thought you're in a middle of a jump and got destroyed by it, now that might just be lag

is there any reason to take the Twilight Tour second shortcut?

With the upcoming patches fixing the whole "get first place, then the game puts you in third place shenanigans", will he finally fuck off?

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What's your name?

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jigsaw

Exactly. Your given the core mechanics and are expected to master them yourself. Doing the time trials will quickly show you where you need to improve.

Dabbing on casuals?

Human Isabella

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>Twilight Tour
>in first place
>place item on the ramp to the fastest boost pad
>win race, because second place can't go as fast as you
Some of these track designs are a bit questionable. It would be different if there was a chance that you can hit something and lose your boost, but the track is very easy to drive. I hope the other new tracks aren't like this

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i'd rather take the U turn below if that's the case, besides, most casuals took the shortcut instead while in down below farming reserves

Ah yeah I see you in my races almost every day I think

Abomination.

is there a feeling worse than getting assraped by your own ghost in time trials?

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what are you doing at 4 am playing ctr user?

so it wasn't explained, got it, thanks for agreeing

Stay bad zoomer.

you should feel proud for that one, you taught it well

It's not 4am where I live but I'm just chilling, enjoying my days off and playing all day/night long

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H-he's fast!

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>z-zoomer
the fact that i got good because of this thread and youtube vids is the proof that this game explains jack shit to you

For me it's finally mantaining USF during the entire race and never do it again.

i thought it was region locked?

Then why are you crying that there wasn't a 10 hour tutorial.

(you)

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>then why are you crying about not having a balanced game
i dunno man? why would i cry when the online is literally equivalent of time trial for me? hell why would i even play online in the first place if most people never visits these threads?

>Tfw lag makes bombs zig zag all over the place
Trying to manuver around those fucking things made me more tense than I had been in any race so far. At least with beakers and masks, you don't see them coming.

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Not the same user but you must be stupid or intentionally arrogant not to understand the point he was making.

I don't think so? might explain why I always see everyone teleporting and shit, other players are probably far away from my location

what the hell are you saying? first you said
>Hey there's a tutorial! you're just bad
now it's
>Mind your own business whether there's a tutorial or not is none of your concern
can you even keep up with a discussion?

You're not making any sense. You just play the game and learn as you go along. Why have so many people forgotten this these days?

I have a bit of video on ny switch where I seem to have somehow jumped over one

Hopefully I can get a cheap PS4 to play this soon.

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I would have never discovered u-turns if I hadn't seen that stuff in these threads

Has anyone figured out the science behind Sewer Speedway's shortcut to hit it 100 percent yet

learn what? do you honestly believe someone could get an idea to stop holding X and push right-down and square to pull a sharp turn without anyone telling them? holy shit
>inb4 B-BUT I CAN...!
Do you really think everyone's a special snowflake like you?

get a SF, pull a 90 degree turn, try to get a momentum at the slide and jump at the edge, i think i mastered it now, i can do it 70% of the time

Stop Arguing and post Bubb

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You just press jump at exactly the right moment, which seems to be right at the edge of the ramp. Barely makes a difference how fast you're going. If anything, going fast makes it more difficult because there's less time to press the button

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Don't bother anons. The dude's delusional or such a fanboy any criticism is flat out wrong.

>tfw got each girl and don't really care for the skins or cart bodies
I guess I'm done with the game until the next grand prix?

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Bandibabes are great

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>I was literally 11 when I mastered sacred fire.
Arent you a little young to be surfing Yea Forums sport?

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Nothing wrong with that, Crash is a chad.

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>Less than 1000 nitro to racer tawna
>almost totally burned myself out because I've played so much during this cup

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>1999
>2019
user he's 30

>user was walking down the hallway.
>"Ohhh...where could N. Tropy be?" user said to himself as he tripped and fell on his PS4.
>Lying there, the front door opened.
>"N. Tropy!" user said lifting up his head.
>"What do you want?" N. Tropy said in a rather pissy tone.
>"Emmm...fallow me." user said as he got up and started to quick walk....

BUFF BALANCED

BUFF MISSILES BECAUSE THEY'RE COMPLETELY USELESS UNLESS SOMEONE IS RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU IN A STRAIGHT LINE

BUFF ORBS BECAUSE WITH MISSILES BEING SHIT 1ST PLACE CAN JUST RUN AWAY SINCE THEY DON'T DEAL WITH ITEMS

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friendly reminder

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A-user? what are you typing?

So he is jewish?

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>BUFF MISSILES BECAUSE THEY'RE COMPLETELY USELESS UNLESS SOMEONE IS RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU IN A STRAIGHT LINE
if you can't maintain 10 wumpa so your weapons aren't useless, just stop playing

2 relics to go
Fucking N. Gin Labs is impossible and Hot Air Skyway might be doable
I just can't get my time lower on the lab

Not to mention that even getting to USF in second place doesn't matter because EACH KART'S TOP SPEED IS THE SAME.

Theres always one.

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Im probably gonna get the switch version. does the 30FPS make that big of a difference?

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Wtf?

>EACH KART'S TOP SPEED IS THE SAME.
Accel vs Balance user where are you?

It's 30 on all platforms.

Every version is 30fps

You need to USF a good portion of the map, I'm not even joking. Especially if you're playing on medium.

It all makes sense now.

*still crashes into a wall*

I think he means top speed with USF.

>"Dammit, user!" N. Tropy said as he started to quick walk, hoping to catch user in a vulnerable position.
>Back in the bedroom, Dr. N_____Cortex and the Rillagang were talking until user came back to the room.
>They looked as door opened.
>N. Tropy was standing behind user, mere inches away and about to give him the corruption of a lifetime
>N. Tropy gave them a nasty look.
>"Hello, Rillagang...Hmmm..." N. Tropy said, ignoring Cortex.
>"Now why did you bring me in here, rats?" Tropy said in his British accent.
>"Oh, you'll see..." user said.

I think top speed means blue fire there. As far as I know, blue boost is the same for everyone

yeah, that user also tested Pinstripe and Joe with the USF item from the battle mode and Joe is still slower than Pinstripe even with USF

Italian.

What kind of fan fic is this.

>we want the tatsumaki audience

user NO

whoops my bad

youtu.be/BB9kZG2TQug
youtu.be/eidEDH3ukOE

Now let's hope it's uncapped when it inevitably comes to PC.

Tatsumaki?

Thanks for the tip
This is gonna take a while

They aren't boosting there though

Best ass

test 3

Are you grabbing all the cluster of 3 boxes at the end of your first lap? It's what I did and it gave me a good 4/5 seconds increase.

Why haven't you given up this bullshit unbalanced game and decided to play Mario Kart 8 Deluxe yet?

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because I dont like a kusoge mario game and want to move on from it

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(You)
now fuck off

I played enough of MK8 on Wii U.
How a out making a 9 instead?

Cause the only good Mario game is on the DS.

Bandicuties

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Oh my bad. But in any case most people seem to pick between Speed or Acceleration, I don't know how close they are speed wise. But I guess maybe a slightly slower speed can be good sometimes if the track has a lot of difficult turns

>say MK is better
>free (You)'s every single time

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>picks balanced or turn character
>literally no chance of winning

>"Come a little closer." user said wiggling his finger.
>N. Tropy came closer. Out of no where, user jumped and pinned Tropy to the bed, inches away from the Rillagang.
>user had a USB in his hand
>"Good riddance, user say. This ends tonight".
>user begins to unbutton the bottom of Tropy's coat
>"Owwwww..." N. Tropy said while sitting up with his hand on his head before he noticed what user was doing...

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that might be the case but it's easily ignored if you can U-turn properly which will completely negates speed class' weakness

I am
I'm just not doing everything fast enough
My best time is a 53 something but everything after has been like 1:05 or something

STOP

>join a lobby
>full of trophy girls
>one of them farts

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Why are gays so degenerate?

>Suck dicks at relic racing, getting mostly sapphires with the occasional gold once in a while
>Plat both Turbo Track and Slide Colosseum

Did they purposely set the time requirement for those extra high as a joke or something?

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>tnts are useless they said
>barely win a neck and neck race cus dude lost his turbos having to jump a tnt off

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those tracks are literally a joke, even on oxide time trial

Skyway is easier though I ended up doing Labs quicker as I'm alot more comfortable with it. For skyway there are 3 annoying boxes in mid-air at the USF boost so make sure you hit them at the right speed and jump. Once you've got that it's easy.

>tnts are useless they said
nobody ever said that, it's just people thought it's an avoidable threat but never considered how it drains reserves

what the fuck?

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haha what if they were driving all day and didn't get a bathroom stop

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This. I ain't shelling out so much for the same tracks I played for countless hours.

What do you guys think of the smaller maps like Crash Cove or Dingo Canyon? I like that they play more like Mario Kart because of how close everyone is and the item proximity for a change of pace

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>"You know your in big trouble, you sneaky skunk." N. Tropy said to user in his British accent.
>"*Giggles* Am I?" user giggled maniacally while unbuttoning the lab pants
>"Little smartass...." N. Tropy said in his mind.
>N. Tropy did not notice user's rope cuff's that he held in his other hand
>"Now wait just a moment...." user said as he just got done tying Tropy up.
>N. Tropy did not resist, but he watch the USB....

>Auto
That was somehow how her original hair was.

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I was going to say the same thing. They're a nice change of pace, because it's more like an actual kart racer. Nobody can get a massive lead just like that, because everyone is going the same speed and you're not safe from items. It's not just about reserves and super boosts and all this other nonsense

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it's one of the more balanced maps, too bad turbo autists hates it as they can't DNF anyone there

Can I play Time Trials on PS4 without worrying my save will corrupt?

Come on, pick up the pace. This anticipation is killin me!

You can back up your save data. I put mine on a usb drive.

GAY_LAD_UK_1987
NUFCMike
LadOnTour
HarrietX94

I fucking hate UK names on PSN.

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I would grind coins for this skin

>tfw finally learning how to maintain USF on deep sea driving.
That track has haunted me since 2005, now that shit is my bitch.

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I think it's fun seeing what kinds of names people use where I live. I always assume most tags don't mean anything, but I guess everybody is stringing together words in their own languages. I see all kinds of funny names

i get the feeling i shouldn't have bought the switch version of this game but i really did not want to pay for PS+

does anyone else play on switch?

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Have you ever seen an image with such power before?

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>there are 'people' that won't use Rebecca Cunningham 'Bella

admittedly a stretch but she was the first character I thought of.

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based

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>
if you time it just right you avoid an orb

Is this achievable natty?

Your girlfriends bull going to town on her.

oh yeah, orbs doesn't travel on shortcuts, good one user, thanks

>user had taken Tropy pants off and left his cold blue skin exposed along with his [censor]
>"Oh Tropy, are you ready?" user said while pushing the USB against Tropy's blue butthole
>"Shit..." Tropy said.
>user didnt hesitate and shoved it in. Within seconds the patch began to upload while user moaned.
>"Ah...owwwww...." Tropy painfully whimpered.
>"I hope Tropy's ok..." The Rillagang said to Cortex as they watched Tropy get patched.
>"Now here's what we're gonna do..." user said as Tropy began screaming
>The door opened and Dingotard walked in
>BEEEENOX
>Tropy was traumtized and began to self-harm post patch

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Obsessed.

I don't get people complaining about difference in skills in lobbies when everyone knew this would happen if you look at how people played the original CTR, you had more normal people who didn't do anything crazy in the game then you had people who would basically skip half of the map and go insanely fast, only difference is that not having online made you not realize it

>The door opened and Dingotard walked in
>BEEEENOX
Where is he now i wonder?

You cannot deny that it is impossible to catch a player coming first if you are in second if first can hold turbos consistently. Unless you really luck out and get a clock or hold one from a lower rank. Blue orbs are too slow and if one is coming from behind you could also be in the firing line.

WTF
Did he really deserve this?!

duh

The thing is, the original didn't had online and now the remake does, that's all about it, if the original had online it would have been the same thing, CTR was always about getting good then curbstomping everything.

Dilate.

No doubt, I've played 4 player CTR on the original and yes the same problem existed. However something that irks me in the remake is that AI in online can get Warp Orbs/Clocks as well, which again do nothing to help players in 2nd onwards. AI in the original could NEVER get these items. Even on hard.

The game does need some kind of catch up system. I win majority of my games due to being able to pull ahead in the first section so long as I don't get rekt by items. The items in 6th-2nd don't help anyone catch up outside of the Gas Canister at 10 Wumpa Fruit which can give you SF outside of turbo pads. Not even masks can put you into SF/USF.

Thats not entirely accurate as i've kinda seen them occasionally go through a few shortcuts but the one on twilight is the only one i can think of on the top of my head that i've never seen an orb go onto

oh fuck stop trying to make me a fury i can only take so much

they should honestly buff the speed boost item, make it USF at 10 wumpa instead of mere SF and distribute it to 2-4th place rather than 5-th place

WHERE
IS
THE
UPDATE
?
WHERE
?

Make first place unable to get the Mask, only Shields, Beakers and Crates.

Make 2nd to 4th get more Masks or Boosts items and less Crates and Beakers.

Make 5th to 7th get Blue Orbs and Clocks a bit more often but not by much and have Clocks affect people on the first positions more than it affecting everyone equally.

and lastly make Blue orbs and make it more detrimental for the 1st place than the rest of the racers

>make blue orbs faster

Problem with Blue Orb is that you don't really know when will hit you if you're not first place and when will it not, because sometimes it would just go past me without affecting me while other times it does.

Outside of that I think it works well enough, maybe make it go a bit faster so it catches on the first place easier but still make it affect everyone so the one that launches it can get ahead.

yeah, i noticed when sometimes i fucked up a turn and crashed into a wall, the orbs just fucked off and made one more lap to reach me

More beta Ami

Attached: beta.png (498x474, 155K)

>Make 5th to 7th get Blue Orbs and Clocks a bit more often
They just updated it so that people get those less

Uh, how do you invite a friend to online matchmaking?

getting real sick of these tryhard crunch fags....

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I'm going fucking insane, can someone friend on PS4? I just want to complete the fucking Friend or For? challenge, AND THESE NIGGER NEVER PICK TWILIGHT TOUR. HELP ME

Have you tried going faster?

>B-BUT ALL CRUNCHTARDS ARE BAD AT THE GAME I-I SWEAR!!

Turning is OP in tiny arena

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So these skins all based off animals but who is Megumi supposed to be. Some lab animal used for make up?

>playing online
>get to the point where I'm not earning coin bonuses
Guess I'm going to sleep faggots

That's just 30 minutes worth of racing.

Should've asked earlier, msn. I was doing my dailies and since I already got motorsport Tawna I'd gladly help out. Bro's doing his nitro challenges, though, so I ain't getting in the way of that.

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>Switch

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Top ten reasons I love Ripper Roo

1. I love him
2. He is a very good boy
3.If you scratch under his left ear, he likes it, and purrs, it's weird but I like him
4.I like him for who he is no matter what, he is very cute
5. He is a very good boy
6. I need to tighten his jacket (that's my job, he can't do it on his own) and he doesn't like to be let out of it
7. He needs walkies
8. He blows himself up with Nitro boxes all the time, he is very funny
9. N.gin sometimes bully him, so I beat him up and protect him
10. He is a very good boy and I love him

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I actually agree

I wish they would hurry up and fix the damn collision already
I keep hitting invisible walls on the jumps on Hot Air Skyway
I take the shortcut? WALL
I go the normal way? WALL

>a human wrote this

It's pretty based don't you think? prevents you from being faster than the 1st place

He's playing against kids, no shit he's winning

there are more kids on ps4 than switch

I'm not even racing against anyone

Stop using the same shit that i invented.
Fucking Fags

time trial or plat race it is then, i can't stress enough how many times i randomly crashed into an oxygen whenever i'm near an edge of a jump

>The software was closed because an error occured.
WHY

if you dont unlock everything during the grand prix, everything will eventually go to the pit shop

Do you know what time it is?

12:30

then it's time to sleep! consider this a warning shot to your save file

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This is better than current Ami, I love the classic hairstyle.
also she shouldn't wear that stupid pants in nitro fueled.

>his hat, his torso and his hand read 12:30
based
Also WHAT is N. Tropy? is he an alien or just a guy that got fucked up by time travel?

crash is a cutie

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>Crash Cove is part of the track select
>5 people immediately pick it
WHY ARE YOU PEOPLE LIKE THIS

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They probably want to clear the challenge

just another scientist acquaintance of aku aku that fucks up time based on the wiki

'Cause Mario Kart 8 doesn't have Pauline yet.

see

neat

I can’t wait to see purple worms in out of time again.

did they imply anything about that?

>platinum relic paint job digital N. Tropy joins the lobby
>almost laps me on electron avenue
I'll never be this good.

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give me the egg

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>A tropycuck that bites as good as his barks
now that's rare

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"Retro Ami" skin when?

Could it be that turn characters are good for battling? Or the crystal challenges, or maybe even hitting the boxes in relic races easier?

I just witnessed a race where literally every single racer got DNF. The 30 second timer started going as soon as lap 3 started.

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yeah

lemme guess, Hyper USFway?

Right on the nose.

*Puts Nitro crate on the edge of turbo pad*
Pssh... nothin personnel kid...

I gave them a feedback so they will add them with this patch.

I want to date megumi.

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That track's shortcut is insane if you took it constantly, you can end the race before anyone reaches lap two with USF

No, I don't mean first place DNF'd everyone. I mean literally no one even got to finish the last lap. I DNF on it all the time, I know it's ridiculous. Doesn't compare to what I just saw, though.

as long as they're not a bitch to implement, i hope that doesn't fuck up the second shortcut

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Really wish the camera would save if you set it to the more zoomed out view.

She's "Lemonade Megumi", just like "Watermelon Tawna" before the change of name

Why is he blue though

do we have any idea how much this update is going to change the load times? do you think we're looking at a ten seconds reduction? or just something tiny like 3 seconds?
how much will boost mode boost the loading on switch? 35 seconds per race is ridiculous, but getting it down to 20 would be great. wishful thinking or possibility?

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wheres the full i know its an edit but please

travelling on cold and vacuum space time turns you blue apparently

>in first on mystery caves
>someone launches blue orb
>it passes me on the fork
>just keeps going past me, doesn't even bother trying to get me
is that supposed to happen

>putting the abomination from the first game in

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>doesn't have dancing Megumi
You're not a real

You can break the tracking in certain areas of each track.

hdporncomics.com/rimi-sex-comic/

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Oh right. I cleared it with Yea Forums on like day 4, I forgot it was a thing.

I can't really say I agree with that. I like CTR because it isn't like other kart racers. What's so wrong with wanting to go fast? If I wanted to play like another kart racing, I'd just pop Mario Kart back in.

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Saved

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Why did Cortex make so many female Bandicoots? Is he based?

it was brio, not cortex

This is probably a stupid question: How can you tell if you are in the top 5%? Is is the number on the left divided by the total number of players on the bottom? I'm like 64.000 out of 393.061 players for Championship Leaderboard (~16%)and 33,000 out of 1.009.261 for Nitro Leaderboard (~3%). Guessing I'm in due to Nitro Leaderboard?

>What's so wrong with wanting to go fast?
as annoying as the item shitstorm is, it's still fun and satisfying throwing a bowling ball at the teams and avoiding missiles, partying with the team rather than being a loner, etc

Fuck off Cortex. Brio is the one that made all the animals. Cortex just stuck them in the vortex to make them into soldiers and failed.

Fuck off, Cortex. You're not taking credit for Brio's creations.

.05 x whatever number is the at the bottom of the leaderboard, if you're below that, you're in the 5%

Yeah I think I genuinely have more fun on those tracks now. It's more intense than either boosting around alone or trying to hopelessly catch first place. Trying to get those perfect laps is fun in time trial though

What's a velo mask

do you have to be in top 5% for champion, or nitro to get the kart, and what's the difference

youtu.be/i0aOkSylBYc

both count, either one you get both kart/decal

uka/aku mask for CNK characters

that's what you get poorfag

sick, currently top 3.2% for Nitro

WHY ISN'T HE APPEARING IN THE SHOP, FUCK.

he was only in the summertime set, you'll probably have to wait until the GP is over. I just barely got him.

I hope the champion kart's engine sound will be good.

papuchads holding the chad fort for rillachad reinforcements

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people are already using it, so you can see for yourself

>people are already using it
With what sorcery

glitchy customization button

Shit
What, how?

Switch niggas be different
hackers and cheaters

>youtube.com/watch?v=sGDMb627NTg
Well I guess it sounds alright, I can't wait to get it.

>entire lobby trounced by motorsport tawna
fucking

>he doesn't honk

I NEED TO HEAR THE HORN

It really is

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its nice seeing liz have so much fun

thanks doc

I'm sticking with the La Chaux for sure now.

but what's the differnece

Actually those other posters are wrong as fuck. He air braked but let go of brake mid air and pressed X for that immediate burst of movement forward.

>next grand prix you have to win 1st on prehistoric playground with Baby T who is Turn

lmfao speedseethers gonna shit themselves

A-are you ok?

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NITRO points are what you earn from races and challenges, champion points are the points uoiu get from the trophy appearing next to your wumpa coins after every online race. you can only get champ points from online races

do we know that yet

I-is this the new strain of deformation virus...???

ah, thanks user

No, but how else do we shitpost that this game sucks?

I thought this was cool when an user posted webms of him doing this but when I tried it I didn't like it as much. It eats up way more reserves than normal U turning.

>watermelon tawna and nigger zem unpatched on switch

BASED

I hope he says "RILLA ROO WINS" when he comes 1st.

I genuinely wish they'd change the stat system so that you can pick whatever class you want for any character. I've been trying to play Turn characters recently but they just don't feel as good to use. So a lot of the characters just don't get used by me

There are always players on Switch, official grand prix rankings have PS4 > Switch > Xbox in terms of overall players online.

Upcoming update will also patch load times by making use of Switch's Boost Mode

BASED ZEMASU, SJWKEKS BTFO

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Game is abandonware tier on switch, still not update.

>Zemasu
Please tell me there's an edit I haven't been in these threads for a minute

I'm gonna complete that challenge within the first day and go right back to Digital N. Tropy and there's nothing you can do about it :^)

>Game is abandonware tier on switch, still not update.
Actually with the latest patch notes I think they've been stalling on Switch updates because they were prioritizing fixing the load times above all else as opposed to immediate gratuitous kilobyte updates just for changing nigger Zem's name or whatever--which will undoubtedly come with the load time patch, but I digress.

not yet, but you can ask drawfags if they are here

Why are they already selling decals for the champion kart before it's even out

I hope they use boost mode to fix the fucking frame drops too, this is unacceptable for a $50 game on a $300 console.

what did we do in 2017 besides Soul Vs Souless and Coco posting?

I'm sure that'll just be for loading levels and not for in game play

i am THIS close
i am THIS FUCKING CLOSE
TO TAKING MY FUCKING SWITCH
AND SMASHING IT INTO PIECES WITH MY FUCKING FOREHEAD
AND THROWING THE FUCKING PIECES ONTO THE ROAD
AND RUNNING THEM OVER WITH MY FUCKING CAR
OH MY FUCKING JESUS CHRIST
I AM GOING TO HAVE A FUCKING HEART ATTAAAAAAAAAAACCKKK

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Thats the true kart racing experience user - blinding rage.

Should I buy it on Switch?
I was burned hard on how little content Sonic had and I want a pallet cleaner from almost 5 years of MK8

it is significantly better than both, when you learn how to play properly

for no reason?

git gud :3

Kill yourself, scumbag.

Got a $10 gift card. Is it too late to get into it? 100%'ed as a kid

not at all

What do you mean

>polar pass
>get clocked before the shortcut
TWICE
Why does this shit only happens to me?

This is likely to happen, a lot of people pushing for it it seems. We'll see, would be great.

Been putting this idea to Beenox, let us see if they answer our prayers.

I'm interested because it will show which character people just like the best overall

because someone actually uses their brain and not randomly clocks for no reason now

HOW IN THE FUCK AM I SUPPOSED TO GIT GUD WITH THESE ABSOLUTE FUCKING MONSTROSITIES DETERMINING THE OUTCOME OF EVERY FUCKING LINE I TAKE YOU SMARMY FUCKING WORM
I WILL SHOVE MY JOYCONS IN YOUR FESTERING FUCKING HALF-COLON-HALF-GENITAL STOMA BETWEEN YOUR GHOUL-PALE STUBBLE-COATED LEGS SINCE YOU APPARENTLY REFUSE TO DILATE YOURSELF

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what are you even trying to do, user?

call PEEnox

GET A PLATINUM RELIC YOU SIMPERING FUCKING DOWNIE

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Finally got 42k nitro
Time for digital n.tropy spam again

Nigger you're only on Mystery Caves. You're never gonna make it with that attitude.

>C shaped platinum relic

>platinum relic
>in a normal race

nice user. I've only got one more unlock until motorsport tawna

Yeah because that random 6th place shitter will think about that

>HURLFGLURPFUDURRFFFFF I CANT FIGURE OUT THAT user IS USING RANDOM SCREENCAPS OF MYSTERY CAVES FROM GOOGLE IMAGES OH MY GOD SOMEONE HELP ME HOLD ALL THESE CHROMOSOMES

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kek

Nash, N. Gin, Pinstripe, N. Trance, Big Norm, Tiny and Ripper Roo

SIZEABLE FEE

>second ramp shortcut
since when

just git gud you stupid bitch

So how does the online multiplier work anyway? I know it lasts for a while, and then comes back after a while. what are the times on that?

have you done any other races other than myster caves?

if you find mystery caves hard, stop now, you're literally fucked and will actually pop a blood vessel, if you're this mad now, wait until it actually gets hard

No amount of air beaking will get me to this level, he's far beyond me!

It lasts for 30 minutes of race total race time every day.
It resets at 8pm in Eastern Standard Time US (figure out what that means wherever you live).

You get a x5 multiplier for your first 30 minutes of online racing. 30 minutes of actual gameplay, not just half an hour after you first start. It's pretty nice, you can start some races early in a day and finish your multiplier later. It resets daily at the same time as the pit stop.

>somebody picks anything but twilight tour
>host leaves, kicks everybody, re match making
>somebody picks anything but twiligyt tour
>host leaves, kicks everybody, rematch making
>twilight tour is mpicked 4 times, everybody stays

OHHHHHHHHHHHH I'MMMM A SPECIAL BOY WHO LOVES TWILIGHT TOURRR, YOU'REEWEEEEE A SPECIAL BOY WHO LOVES TWILIGHT TOUR, WEEEEE'REEE ALL SPECIAL BOYS WHO LOVE TWILIGHT TOUR

TWY

LUT

TOUR.

You're a cringy gay cunt that's what you are.

t.wilight tour

that was cringe as fuck user but you are right. fuck that stupid map

Twilight Tour is getting boring but that doesn't stop you from being a faggot.

NO MORE PLEASE GOD NO NO NO BEENOXPLEASE NO MORE TWILIGHT TOUR NO PLEASE GOD STOP, I'M BEGGING YOU PLEASE GOD NO, PLEASE GOD NO I;LL DO IT I'LL DO IT I'LL SING THE TOUR PLEASE N-- PLEASE DON'T MAKE ME RACE IT AGAIN PLEASE-- NO-- PLEASE-- I'LL SING SING I'LL

I'MMM A SPECIAL BOY WHO LOVES TWILIGHT, YOUUU'RE A SPECIAL BOY WHO LOVES TWILGIHT TOUR!~~ WE'RE ALL SPECIAL BOYS WHO LOVE TWILIGHT TOUR, TWY LUT TOUR ALLLL DAYYYY~~!!!

PLEASE GOD JUST-- NO I'VE DONE IT, I'VE DON-- I SANG IT, I SANG IT LOUD, THEY HEARD IT, PLEASE GOD NO, NOT AGAIN, NOT AGAIN! PLEASE BEENOX NO, NOOOOOOOOO NOOOOOOOO PLEASE. PLEASE. PLEASE NOT AGAIN OH MY GOD PAPU PAU PYRAMID YEESS HOLY FUCK SOMETHIGN DIFFERENT AN--*host disconnects*

*Twilight Tour appears 5 votes*

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH PLEASEEEEEEEE GOD NO

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How much you betting by the next 5 threads we'll have people singing unironically I'm a Special boy who loves twilight tour song??

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What's wrong with the fov? it's so jarring on the starting line.

Is he literally a 10 year old or something? I know I came here when I was young but I never partook in such blatant homosexuality.

i unironically love Twilight Tour though, the feeling of getting the Second USF is satisfying

stop, do not meme this
blocked. don't @ me
probably

I finally got all the platinum relics
Now to back up my saves and call it a night

I like the track but I'm sick to death of it getting 5 votes every single time. Not to mention when it shows up twice on the list for no fucking reason.

>shows up twice on the list for no fucking reason
never happened to me so i can't relate

Ok, now WHAT? Why is my game haunted, why does the weird shit only happens to me?

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Any switch players down for a "friendly meeting" challenge?

sw 4817 4075 6894

Mystery Caves is just fucked in the remake. The original turtles were much better and basically always bounced you off of them in the original.

they're actually ahead of you, but latency doesn't show it

This wasn't as fun to try as I thought it would be, im gonna be stuck at dragon mine oxide for a while.

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I literally just jumped around the corner to beat oxide

>the feeling of getting the Second USF is satisfying
>tfw the feeling losing the second USF

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yeah, that, i still have trouble managing the second usf, i got it sometimes tho

Yeah you don't really need to do that to beat Oxide, it's just a neat trick

>going ham with second USF
>clock goes off right before the first ramp of next lap
TROPYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

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That's why I fucking hate those time limited events. You feel forced to play.
Next GP, I'll definitely buy a turbo controller and let it grind by itself.

thinking about this too. what's the verdict? set a 1 human vs 1 human player in a 3 minute timed battle mode all day?