CTR: NITRO

I know we sometimes joke about bandicoots, but a potoroo isn't even a real animal.

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How the hell do you do the 'kamikzae' challenge without 2 controllers? Tried doing it through online battle and private match with a friend but it didn't work or respond, so it seems the only way is to actually do it against bots, who even on easy never fucking stay still or do anything to let you get close.

The campaign AI rubber bands worse than any Mario Kart
>In first by a stretch when I look at the map
>Tiny appears directly behind me when I look back
Absolute fucking shit.

anyone else feel like everybody gangs up on you with items?

I did it in a private match no problem

So you did an online lobby with two friends?
Then you one at a time put a tnt on your head next to each other?

They only fire weapons at the player when you're super fucking close and it needs to be changed. The original game gave you time to dodge their attacks.

one sat still. I dropped a tnt near them, drove into it and drove right next to them.

First for "Why the fuck are they doing sorceress over Elora"

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>Finish the 3rd lap in reverse
>Hit 15 missles in a row without missing

So this is how grand prix events will be huh, just make a private match and fucking grind for nitro?

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user...

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PS4 is trying to download version 1.05 but keeps getting errors. What do?

I think you guys need to retry the Thunder Struck shortcut. It's definitely been tampered with in some form. It's not as easy to pull off, and at one point I was in the middle of it and the game suddenly pushed me into 8th place as if it knew I was cheating, and this wasn't even online.

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Yup. The nitro system is trash.

>Had almost 5K coins
>they're all gone
WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT

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twitter.com/CrashBandicoot/status/1146600295905914880
5x WOMB COINS
>5x WOMB COINS
5x WOMB COINS
>5x WOMB COINS

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Ay lobby bros, Guy here
Going for 4th

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Mex, Tight, I fucked up

No idea which place I'm missing

oh dear.

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>Unable to Connect to Server
BEENOX FIX THIS SHIT

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Anybody else getting unable to connect to servers on Switch?

Yep also no coins

>They added Bandicoot to Crunch's name
Autism: Relieved

Yes, for the second fucking time tonight. They really fucked something up.

Are the switch servers down right now? I can't connect to the pitstop immediately after I got enough coins for the Megumi bundle

>All those comments of people bitching
I want out of this timeline

reinvite, hold on lads

Mex here, I've got 3rd, 4th, and 5th left. I'm taking one of those.

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Same thing happened to me.

Yeah same. Game keeps crashing too. Just end me lads.

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Consider this your final warning

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land shark from ctr 2010 when

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They still need to add potoroo to pinstripe’s name

Guy here
I'll take 5th

fuck it, will just try them all, going for... 5th, cos here

I think Beenox got overambitious with the Grand Prix, because this is a buggy nightmare. It would've been a lot simpler and smoother for all this to just be free DLC packs later down the road. Instead, they had to make a big event out of the new content and make getting it all a total grindfest that doesn't even benefit them financially (because lets be real, they aren't gonna put in micro transactions for one big reason; it's obvious that micro transactions were the original plan but the legal battle in the US courts made them take it out late into development and this is just a bandaid to put over the original plans, and now it'd be too late to go back to the micro transaction model plan). We're fucked either way.

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take 5th, i'll take 6th, (cos)

When does the game crash for you? I want to do time trials when I get back from my wage cuckery

My game crashes when I try to play while the servers are down. Can someone let me know when they're working again?

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YES BEENOX I'M HAVING A BLAST PLAYING BATTLE MODE AGAINST MYSELF FOR NITRO YOU FUCKING TWATS

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Round 2 Switch friends

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As great as the remake is, the Grand Prix is a textbook example of how NOT to extend the longevity of a game

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I've heard that game was turned in to dreamworks racing

>The Switch servers are down again.
Please N.Tropy, I'm trynna do my challenges

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ok, NOW i'll take 5th, holy fuck that is harder then it looks. npcs fucking fighting for it (cos)

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On the menu.

>booted out of lobby for "patch available"
>try to force update and nothing
did I miss something?

(guy) I think 6th is all I need

>Small Norm took my 3rd place
FUCKING MIMES

Knew it'd be tricky. At least now I only got 2 spots left.

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Holy shit, it's a fucking necromorph

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>bought the game yesterday
>almost at Silver tier
i'm doing okay, I just need to beat Oxide once before I start diving hard online to try and get everything in the prix.
Currently maining N. Gin, not because he's acceleration but it doesn't hurt

>play crash team racing
>finally megumi is in the pit stop!
>go to pitstop
>...wait
>ooohhh nononononooo
>0 wumpa coins
>had like 5k
>WHAT IS GOING ON
>suddenly
>at the door from my room
>i hear a ticking sound
>open the door
>its fucking N Tropy
>he looks me straight in the eyes and says: "Now you're on my time faggot"
>he corrupts my save data
>then he breaks my switch in half just for good measure
>he runs away, while yelling "Time Fliiiieeeesss!"
>goddamnit N tropy

How are the switch servers down if I'm still playing games with some guy?

switch servers are coming back up soon

i cant fucking find any races online on switch

I like the idea of the GP but yeah they went a little overboard. The community is hyped as hell though so they got that right. It's only the first one so maybe they'll get the next ones right.

Tropy woke up from his nap and just logged in to play again

See:

Okay what the fuck?

I just finished a race clearly in first, was first on the leaderboard, race ended as normal.
Then like halfway through the "Race Ending" Time, The game put me at 4th??? and gave me rewards as if I was 4th??? Beenox what the fuck??

(cos here) lads

I can't find it... I think It might be 7th? if it isn't 7th, it's 4th, it isn't 4th

I reenter that woah like hate state

going for fourth

GOT IT
Cos got rekd and I almost ruined the order lmao

First Norm, now Fake Crash. These CPUs are cheeky fucks.

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well done dude

fuck, last one is fucking me over lel

Does 8th to 1st challenge work in a private lobby?

here's a pic

what the fuck beenox

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I like the idea of a daily challenge board and metagame unlocks but it needs to be grand, not grind.
I'd be down with them keeping the challenges around as coin supplements but they need to be tweaked to be things that you can generally work towards without cheesing instead of needing to bullshit the system.
Encourage us to beat certain time trial challenges, do relic races, play in mirror mode, play battle mode with bots. There's a whole lot of game that players simply ignore because there's no carrot-on-a-stick for it. Having coins distributed this way also helps alleviate the offline coin drought by giving them an alternative to online grinding and it gives them a way for their skill to directly correlate with payouts.

I hope this never gets fixed

Lmao git gud, scrub.

How the fuck did Beenox make online WORSE? The item spam just increased with the changes they’ve made which only worsened the things people complained about before. I’m still really enjoying the game but they absolutely have to undo this change.

fucking got it lads (cos)

what you need?

This is a friendly reminder that the Xbox is next

>second time this evening a lobby picked clockwork wumpa over tiny arena
FUCKING STOP IT

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Tight/Mex when you're done with cove, we should do >last place, to first on final lap

Nice one, man. Mex just needs 5th and that'll be it for me.

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(guy) I just need the last place challenge but I don't know if it works here

i got fuckin tropy'd online

Good, well done.

Hmm, what's a good map for it?

Oh shit right, that's a thing. Hell, we can start doing it now. My 5th place doesn't affect you two. I'll just go after you two.

5th for Mex it is

Oh god oh fuck. What’s gonna happen on their turn?

>everyone uses that fence shortcut

For the switch bros who can’t get megumi yet

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Are the pro challenges bugged? I can't get the backwards one or the 25 perfect boosts one even though I'm counting them as I do them in a 1v1 race with 2 players.

that's Out of Time, not Clockwork Wumpa (unless Clockwork has one too)

>yfw N. Tropy brings back the red ring of death

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Thanks

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Oh FUCK Mex, my bad. Fucked that up royally, this time, just sticking to the back

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Cos, what the hell?

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for perfect boosts it needs to be at race-start, you need to rev your engine a few times before you can actually get the boost meter into the "perfect" zone

I guess it's broken then, I was wondering about the 25 perfect boosts too and was beginning to question if I've been doing them wrong this entire time

Do you guys know the Thunderstruck skip? Where you jump off to the right at the finish line?
We can wait for the ai there and have someone in 8th do the skip to see if it works.

Red ring scares, and coins will be deleted permanently for a start.

(cos here) i'm not even going to drive, it's yours. I'm a naughty bandicoot , GENIUNE mistake

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Look, just one of you two do the last to first thing on the final lap while I do my thing. Capisce?

Did we fuck up? Going again.

you can't do it on this map, don't worry. I tried it, that's how I fucked it up. just let mex get 5th, don't worry

do not go for beating last to first on cove, trust me

>Hit 15 missles in a row without missing
I was actually pretty close to this one without cheesing
I forgot how I botched it, but was busy focusing on other ones.

Yeah too many of these objectives are me just playing single player on easy mode. I feel like there's just too many of them to try to do them legitimately in the time given. Instead of these overally specific objectives like "Capture 5 flags as Coco in Nitro Court" it should just be something simple like "Play 5 battle mode games online"

Fuck fuck too fast I'm sorry

FINALLY

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The missile one isn't so bad, you can do it against AI. Just make sure you're close enough to them so the missile can't possibly miss

There we go. Thanks for ending that shit early.

Shit, you're right. It needs to be a long one. Alright, who's first?

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>Make it easy as fuck to make coins in the first few weeks to reel people in
>People are swimming in Wumpa Coins
>Change the system to give out a whole lot less coins during your big event
>Nobody can earn coins to buy all the racers they want
>Once the event is over Activision will put in a cash shop where you can buy racers from past events you have missed
Mark my words

any updates on switch fuckery?

Okay, a good map for >last to first I imagine, is something like....Eletric Avenue, maybe?

Ami > Isabella = Tawna > Liz > Megumi

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oh shit, which map did you do it on??

Is Isabella available yet?

I just learned about SF and USF today. Ended up beating 5 N. Tropy times and 1 oxide time so far.

Noticed a large improvement in my performance online, especially on tracks im familiar with.

Feels good man.

Aw crap, what happened?

Expect round 3 in the morning

>grand prix going on
>coins have been increased across the board
Your words are fucking worthless.

pc wen

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>Just played against a Weegee on Hot Air Skyway
Shit, are you here? Are you the same Weegee from Mario Kart 7 Yea Forumseekends?

Sounds good as long as you can get the u turn shortcut and keep blue flame for at least most of the last lap.

Mex, Cos
I gotta go on an errand. Thank you guys for the help. I'll be back in an hour.

do what?

Oh, okay. Actually, that sort of works out for me, I got some shit to do for probably 30-40 minutes. Mex out, we'll meet back in hopefully soon.

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Based.
You're on my time now faggot.

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>coins increased across the board

this is false.

>fuck up the fence shortcut every time and spend 10 seconds trying to turn around

Somehow everyone pulls off the fence shortcut but no attempts the the 2nd shortcut on that map after the small jump and I always make my comeback there

The last place to first place challenge

Oh... okay, was fun lads.

Megumi's voice is weird. What is that accent?

I really wish the Nitro challenges would give coins too. I literally can't get into a fucking online race because of my shitty internet and offline is such a grind.

Oh and my ps plus runs out tomorrow. FUCKING MAGNIFICENT!

I kinda like that they are giving us a checklist of stuff to do for points, but I've never been one to like doing this sort of stuff in games. Daily and weekly challenges are just not my thing. I'll play at least one a day to get some points or whatever, but I don't see myself going all out and dedicating hours doing challenges.

I got gud

how the fuck do you get perfect starts?

What's this about Switchbros not being able to buy Megumi? I bought Megumi just fine earlier today.

They have though you fucking retard.

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...nani

mash X at the start

Poorfag here, it's gonna be a while until i get a Switch (not gonna get a Ps4 with Ps5 on the way either and online is pricey)

But anyway, will these trophy girls still be in the Pitstop after the grand prix ends or will i have to wait several more months?

Getting my switch likely in August
But anyway,

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Wtf it's only day 2.
How are you already on the third tier?

Rev 3 times, third rev on green light. The meter should be full on the third rev.

It sounds a bit like an English as a Second Language type foreign accent.
If they are trying to be faithful to the real Megumi Hosoya, it's a Japanese-English accent.

Don’t listen to this half assed explanation. user, you should know better. You want to pump three times or something like that before getting the meter to full at the green light.

It's not hard, man. I haven't even done all of the themed/pro challenges and I'm in the gold tier as well.

>so many downs on this list

lol nice research retard

Joined a online lobby game randomly, guess which course I got?

Crash Cove.

I've entered that woah like state again.

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I think they removed the online multiplier. The daily 5x bonus is still there, but I think the general one is gone now.

Used to be getting like 360 in 5th place sometimes, now in 1st I'm getting like 160 most of the time. Then once it wears off I'm at around 40-60 in first.

It's clearly Japanese

>1 more themed to go
>2 more pro to go
LET'S FUCKING DO THIS

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I'm still mad Tawna doesn't have a thick Ozzie slant.

>not saving them till the end
user, what if they introduce more Nitro percentage boosters?

I always used to do this in the PS1 game. In this one I've been lazy and just pushed X once before the green light, I thought I was still getting the full boost but guess not. Neat

Not the same user, but if your talking about the reverse lap challenge, I did it on Coco Park. Set to 7 laps, easy, overlap everyone twice.

they went for the Ellen Ripley/Sarah Connor action heroine slant, but I'd still also like to have an ozzie tawna

take what you can get, I guess

lmao I just mash and get perfect starts everytime.
You need rhythm

>And a Chris
It is you guys, isn't it

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>so much good skins and characters for sale
>need two different karts to complete a challenge though
FUCK

I'm glad I don't have to fucking worry about this Wumpa Coin shit since all I need to do is run the Skull Rock farming method while I'm at work and have more than enough coins for shit I want when I get home.

Yeah I think the three times is necessary to get the full boost. I’ve heard this somewhere but not sure if it’s actually confirmed, so my explanation is pretty half assed too.

explain

Meant to reply to not to 225

The "new tracks are characters for free" thing is still pretty cool, though.

Here's your waifu bros

youtube.com/watch?v=o9bi1h2PcW0

>crystal challenge
>skull rock
>hard mode
>start challenge
>afk
>challenge ends in 55 seconds, gives you 15 wumpa coins as a consolation prize
>mash continue every minute
>about 900 coins an hour
>about 7200 coins in one work day

I know it's gay as fuck to "ship" characters, but does anyone else pair Ami with Crunch?
Just think of the flexing. Every day is gains.

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tawna's redesign in this game sucks

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ah fuck I can't do that on ps4

should have given megumi a japanese accent

I disagree, I greatly prefer NST / CTRNF Tawna over OG Tawna.

fucking glitches holy shit

woosh

How the FUCK do you squash puny karts on Crash Cove? I land on them but they di not squash.

Please post more glitched models they are making my day

>hit enemies with 15 missiles in a row without missing
What's the easiest way to do this?

>Console battery is on 5%
>Pick Electron Avenue
I'm playing with fire here, aren't I

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You need boost item and run into someone

>Have the money for Crash dummy N. Gin
>But I also wanna save up for Megumi since im 2000 wumpa coins short
What do I do lads?

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>just unlocked Tawna
So what am I missing bois?
I don't have reasons to get more nitro I don't give a shit about skins and customization.

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>another update
What could it be?

Oh, shit, I didn't see the picture. I'm a retard.

She does have a Japanese accent, it's not just totally ching ching rice field tier

Guys, I ended up buying the Crikey instead of Megumi, and now my day bonus has run out. How awful will it be to grind for 1100 Wumpa coins, or should I just say fuck it?

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Can you squash with drift boost?

it didn't fix thunderstruck lmfao

>900 coins an hour
you can earn more by just playing online and being good

>"friend" wants to trade achievements
>let him win
>next match he proceeds to autism rsce and deny you 1st place as tawna on twilight tour
>is a cunty little bitch about it

This is why both friends and shitty grinding challenges are a mistake

Jiggling tits

really? sounds more like french or some shit.

Enjoy fun gameplay

Is there a Japanese dub for this game? I’d consider that as her canon voice

Battle mode, rockets only, final destination

Maybe your flag of choice? I’m not an amerilard so I’m going with Nigeria or Ethiopia

900 coins an hour while AFK though

You get about 50 coins per race so that's like 22 races

Sick of these bitches...

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this shit is impossible

Pro tip, you can do all of the challenges that do not specify being online in offline modes, including splitscreen with no ai

I've barely seen any Isabelle players

Read the post, dipshit. That's 900 coins an hour while I am at work. It's a hell of a lot better than not getting any at work and then obsessing over their shitty broken online mode all night.

Cocofags BTFO

FUUUUCK
FUUUUUUUUUUCK
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK
I FUCKED UP
I FUCKING FUCKED IT THE FUCK UP
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK I HAD IT

1100 ain't shit

Isabella's not on sale yet

Has she even been available? I've seen Liz, Ami, and Megumi since the event started.

What are some tracks that are fun in time trials/singleplayer but shit in multiplayer?
>Roo's Tubes
>Coco Park
>Dingo Canyon

Trophy girls will still be in Pit Stop. it's only Tawna that will be available again at a later date

told you not to race him user

ha ha

This.I hate theres no ranks or anything to indicate skill.

I just raced an Isabella

Good to know, thank you!

you raced a npc, not a player

N. Tropy always gets his due.

>have woman characters
>sell them in a shop
Wow, I can’t believe beknocks objectifies women like this. I’m boycotting this game and everyone who supports it are misogynistic scum

>22 races
Well, guess I'll just race like fucking crazy tomorrow

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still would
nice juggs

Git got fag

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Based Beenox putting women in their place.

There isn't, as far as I can tell.

I can't believe Coco is fucking dead

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>thinking i've won my first ever online race by a mile
>the game actually glitched and i was playing with bots instead
>still got the challenge done
Fuck it i'll take it

I need pictures

pictures of Megumi

Pictured: Aftermath of me beating cocofags 20 seconds ahead of them

She's fine.

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>forced into using the other bandicoochies for the 10% nitro increase
>feel ashamed every race

She'll be back in the spotlight after the GP

WHERE THE HELL IS PARKER WHEN YOU NEED HIM?

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>getting a mask in first place
I feel dirty

Next time make him give you the win first.
Or stop being friends. He sounds like a cunt.

But it feels good, right?

Is 1:30ing on Jungle Boogie really the best way to grind offline? I hit the coin cap and I can't be assed to play anymore wonky online today.

Protection against orb.

ATTENTION ALL TROPY MAINS OR UH NIGGERS AS I LIKE TO CALL THEM

>grind offline
never gonna make it

Thunderstruck is still the best if you do the exploit.

I think that this chart though is accurate:

>sweaty coco pit

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git gud

Why is Megumi so fucking happy? I love her.

My cat is put into a trance everytime Crash pops up

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What does the new update do? The small one.

We all do user

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cute

Hey guys what if Coco loved and cherished you as your girlfriend like as a joke haha

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>After ten minutes of playing online

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Wait, shit, the trophy girls are available in the pitstop now? Or is it over already?

Who the fuck hosts a tournament and has it end right before 4th of july weekend?

Aren't we all? Just that title screen alone is filled to the brim with soul.

Cute.

>even the AI routinely fucks this jump up

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They're in for the month user

Look.

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They're available in the pitstop, but the Grand Prix is going on all month. Tawna can only be won in the GP though.

Learn to read retard.

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What do we think of Twilight Tour compared to other tracks?

>homestuck
based

decent track

Its alright. Its like Crash Cove or Volcano Island on steroids. Its got that "first track of the cup" feel.

i forgot Biker Crash is coming at some point

i really want Biker Crash

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The blur on it is what kills me the most

I was a big fan of Mario kart 8. will I enjoy this game? Really considering buying but a few things about it are turning me off

Pinstripe is a MOTHERFUCKER. Can't wait to play as him

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Good.

Easy track to hold USF on for a shitter like me so I like it.

JUST ADD MICROTRANSACTIOSN ALREADY. GRINDING FOR COINS IS ANNOYING AS FUCK

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Holy fucking shit

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What's turning you off?

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I like it since I do pretty decent on it.

Fuck yeah time to autistically grind.

fuck you you fucking faggot gay ass homo digits posting loser I don't need to hear any of that crap from your dick sucking lips smacking while you chew on gay gum in your grease soaked shirt I just wanted to ask my friends on Yea Forums if the trophy girls were still available and save myself a few cents of electricity booting up my PS4 and MOST posters were nice about it so how about you stop fucking posting god you're so fucking annoying don't ever reply to me again.

>JUST ADD MICROTRANSACTIONS ALREADY
This is the exact sentiment Activision wants you to have. That's why they've made grinding for coins annoying as fuck.
People like you are why Activision does this.

>no motorcycle

Do you like Mario Kart because of random item party mode shit or actually driving?

No you won't. CTR has a high skill ceiling.

Bros wtf... I though I wasn’t a furry... what are all these bandicootchies doing to me?

DON'T GIVE IN TO ACTIVI$ION. THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT THEY FUCKING WANT.

Clockwork Wumpa has one before U turn

My cat (RIP) would be entranced watching polar bears on TV screens. She never cared about TVs until one day a David Attenborough thing about polar bears was on and for some reason their roars made her go right up to the TV and stand on her back legs to watch them. I’d put YouTube footage of polar bears on and it got the same result. No other bears did the trick, only polar bears. She’d do the same thing watching me play Crash 2 when the Bearminator was on screen, but she didn’t seem to recognise Polar as one.

Is their a relation between cats and polar bears I’m unaware of? Is that why Polar and Pura are friends? How deep does the rabbit hole go?

>time to autistically grind
My man. We'll make it bro.

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It’s quite good. I like the guy riding the carpet with the wumpa crates in it. Pretty cute touch imo. It’s a bit basic but I’m sure they put out an easier stage as the first for a reason

Have you played Diddy Kong Racing? Have you played F-Zero GX? This is somehow like both of those.

is he about to fucking shoot her?

I was a high level player and interested in the competitive side of the game

load times, drifting looks weird

this is what interests me, how so?

It’s pretty simple but well designed. There are parts designed for each class to excel at and to suffer at, so it’s one that keeps you on your toes at different points no matter who you pick. Pretty solid overall, makes me optimistic for the rest of Beenox’s original tracks.

>I'm at the bottom of the 5% bracket for Nitro and I'm fucking shit
>Can't do pro challenges cause not pro
>Can't do themed because also not pro
>No friends
I'M SINKING HELP ME

How am I supposed to hit everyone with an item?

>Item clusterfuck in every race's beginning act to jew over those who boost start.
>Just like, land the TNT ackbar and get 4 nitro award related things
ez

>Twilight Tour finally comes up
>"Fuck yes, it's my time"
>switch to Tawna
>dominate entire race
>Orb'd right at the end of the 3rd lap
>guy in second steals the race
>this has happened twice now

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Hope you get a clock when you’re at 8th and nobody has protection

If I had all the time in the world to grind I would, but I can't play vidya as much as I'd like to and grinding isn't something I want to do.

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>High level Mario Kart player
>Competitive side of the game

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BRO AS LONG AS YOU DONT HAVE A FURSONA AND DRESS UP IN FUR SHIT YOURE GOOD ...right guys?

It starts as a kart racer but once you get good at boosting it becomes something else entirely. Load times are longer but they aren't frequent enough to get mad at.

I swear on God if I hear another person call Isabella uninteresting/bland again heads are gonna start rolling.

I SWEAR the Crash fanbase is slowly morphing into the Splatoon fanbase.

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>tfw not part of the 5%

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ha ha, nice reaction meme lad tip of the fedora to you

And again, Activision is exploiting you and people like you who don't have the time to grind and would rather unlock everything quickly. That's their game plan.

>when you've played so much you're at the point where you're doing worse and worse
>holding boosts too long
>accidentally hopping because you let go of the other boost button too soon

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from what I can't tell, the percentage thing only has to really do with how many races you do. obviously getting a decent position helps but still.

clock or fully juiced orb hit everyone.

After the race he's going to shoot her womb full of rat jizz

No user, they don't rubber band at all. As a matter of fact if you aren't shit at the game you can even lap them.

>Mash A
>At work
Huh? How?

how much is the 5%

It's 30 second load times on Switch. Its just barely enough time to shit post on Yea Forums. Drifting isn't as hard as people make it out to be. It will take a day at most to understand how to do it and a lifetime to perfect it.

Fuck off, faggot. Just give them feedback asking for coin and kart/skin/paint distribution to be more balanced.

>you turn around and see the nitro girls in the top 5% bent over in front of you
>WWWHHHHRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

GLOCK GLOCK I'M THE ASSHOLE WITH A CLOCK

>>when you've played so much you're at the point where you're doing worse and worse
This isn't a real thing, you're just getting worse at the game. Stop being greedy and just race.

>just got papu pyramid platinum relic
I HATE THESE FUCKING FLOATING BOXES FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK

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Ok, well, you gotta have the kind of job where it's low profile and shit. I just watch disabled people snap easter eggs at a sheltered workshop all day, so I just have my Switch on in my desk drawer and hold a Joy-Con in my hand, mash A every minute.

Kinda looks like Lanky Kong

Fucking worth it

>never get to the podium
>see others ragequit because of it even though the coins you gain make it worth it
Why

Just got it
Never thought I'd have to lose on purpose

Isabella is bland.
Isabella is uninteresting.
And, worst of all, Isabella has the smallest tits.

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pretty sure most people are just disconnecting from shitty internet

Unless they can farm it, it's basically a matter of
>Hey I can't win and the game demands me win 10x online
>Fuck it I'm leaving/exploiting to turn everyone into AI on my end.

I feel you. It's a real fucking grind. But you DON"T WANT microtransactions. You want Beenox to raise the coin output/lower the shop prices. Especially for offline.

Based Stew putting waifufags in their place

Based as fuck

>mfw I haven't won a single online race since the game came out.

There's always the one dude who basically gets so much of a lead that he is unreachable. Saw I a guy getting closed 4 times but he was so far away it didn't even mattered. Not even orbs would get to him.

I never got bullied to much by items but I do fucking hate that items can be placed in the air and that missiles kinda suck ass now. Some of them even miss point blank. Yeah some of them are ass, shit like hitting every box in coco Park timer trial was pretty boring. Then again a lot of people already have a shit load of item from the Grand prix and we still have a month to do these so I ain't too worried about them. I only want the second free kart.

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How do you get back into top 3 when you get knocked into last? Because my last 3 races have gone more or less the same:

>get hit by orb/clock
>immediately get hit by homing weapon out of stun
>rest of the pack unload their items on me as they pass
>End up fighting with 5-7th place for the rest of the race

VROOM VROOM!

>There's always the one dude who basically gets so much of a lead that he is unreachable
I've had matches like that and close matches. Basically depends on the person in 3rd and if they want to be an asshole

Why is Isabella such a chestlet?
I mean Ami and Liz are both fucking huge

I won my first race online since release today. I won by 2 seconds and a fucking clock used by someone who ragequit immediately after. I haven't won until I played Megumi. Won 3 games in a row and got a mass explosion of Nitro from it. Got me Tawna I WAS LATE TO THE PARTY and into Silver a chunk.

Damn dude I usually come first in like 95% of my games that I started giving wins to other players instead by waiting at the finish line.

WOOOOO BABY I JUST BROKE I TO THE GOLD TIER REWARDS

Does anyone else has been fucked by the tiny temple bug? Got hit twice in a row by it in a race.

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>Hit 15 opponents in a row using a missile without missing once

Can I do this in battle mode and if not, does it at least carry over to different races?

Are my lobby bros in here? Mex, Cos?
I need to try that last to first challenge if you guys haven't done it yet.

>your mum's an armadillo
What?

>Isabella has the smallest tits
Bullshit, have you seen her model ingame? She actually has some breasts.

Also, the bland and uninteresting arguments could also apply to the other three.

Liz is the stereotypical "Sexy" one, that's it.
Ami is the fighter, that's it.
Megumi the hyperactive clutz, that's it.

I'm sure i'll get fucking assblasted for saying that about them. The same thing happens in the Splatoon fanbase when someone DARES to criticize Marie in any form.

You can do it in battle mode. In fact, I just plugged in a second controller and removed the AI so I had a free shooting range for that very challenge in battle mode.

>made coin grinding worse
>race car was only on the pit stop for a day
figures...

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Who the fuck at Beenox got the idea in their head that people enjoy getting like 5 Warp Orbs and 3 Clocks each race? Why won't they just make the skill-based matchmaking fucking work so that DNFing isn't an issue? Why do they have to make the most unfun items the ones that show up the most?
I could at the very least accept Activision's bullshit with pushing online play if the online was at least acceptable. But this is just fucking abysmal.

NANI the fuck

Got anything else that needs doing?

Nice timing, I just got back. Not sure if Cos is around but I'm game.

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Except Megumi has the smallest tits

Hate us for being Cocofags, but her podium animations are unbelievably adorable. I'll gladly be a tryhard USFer just so I can see her smile.

Sheeeet Wagebro, wish that was me.

Yeah, if first gets a break away there's no way to catch up to them, especially if they're a TT master. Race is usually decided in the first 20 seconds of the race.

>all these posters complaining about grinding
>tfw you own the PS4 and Switch version and have to grind on both

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Honestly most of my matches have been one dude getting the lead and staying there. All I ever got was second place. It is infuriating to not get a decent item to hit the first player.

Yeah, I need to come first to get me some nitro boost.

>Liz is the stereotypical "Sexy" one, that's it.
>Ami is the fighter, that's it.
>Megumi the hyperactive clutz, that's it.
That's still more than what Isabella has.

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I'm in (cos)

I just need the final lap one lad

Let's attempt it then
I'll start a lobby
What track?

why?

Fat faced yellow rat

Can you guys take your namefqgging to /vg/ or would you rather the mods delete CTR threads on sight?

Cortex all day everyday.

Are the switch servers down or something?

Where we going?
Almost done, my bad

>miss the track select vote everytime because my dumbass forgets to skip the podium cutscene

BEEENOOOOOXXXXX

we're just talking so we know who it is online user, nobody is avatar fagging, stop being silly

Over-invested waifufag detected. Isabella was always the bottom girl even in the original CTR.

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Not our fault that the game is rigged so shittily that you have to buddy up to get Nitro

muh portable (even though you don't get coins on the go)

Alright, let's do it. Something long, I suppose. Tiny Arena, Electron Avenue, Polar Pass. Whatever works, I guess.

>hit someone directly with a beaker during our Crash Cove grind
>didn't get the Alchemist trophy
This game is fucked.

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I see the Ami Chads are all on xbox tonight.

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hm.... electric avenue?

No

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Don't blame me when we can't have these threads anymore.
We're already pushing it with the constant threads.

>Event turns the game into a soulless grindfest

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If they gave everyone the Aussie cunt accent, this would turn into Ty Team Racing.

So is the PSN save thing fixed?

I didn't get it lads, weird

alright sorry dude, we're almost done

Jesus they were unsettling in the original games.
The trophy girls never kickstarted my puberty or anything, they just freaked me out and made me wish they wouldn't stare at me like that.

i want to whiff

Did it work?

Play more to get enough for both, duh

I've been playing Pinstripe, but I might change it up and play his woman a bit.

>Hit 3 opponents with a red beaker while in 5th place going backwards as Dingodile on Tiny Temple while holding 6 wumpa fruit on the 2nd lap

Git gud faggot this is all skill based

Hows Team Sonic Racing's online compared to this? Easy to find a match?

It didn't, odd. however, that is a good map for it

Maybe it doesn't work in private

Megumi clearly has a japanese accent, I don't know what you guys are talking about.

>playing with Yea Forums is against DA RURS now
Get fucked.

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Isabella has just as much as personality as the other three do, she is the gentle and loving one that loves having fun doing what she loves.

But I forgot, defending her is like defending Callie, it's apparently a crime against humanity.

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>only complete quick and daily challenges
>maybe some weekly challenges
>just have ami’s skin for decked out outfit
>in the top 1.2%

lads, getting the kart isnt as bad as I hoped

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HOW DO I GET KAMIKAZE TO WORK

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Look at their actual models sitting in their cars in their default outfit now. You don't even need to have them unlocked to check. Megumi has the smallest tits.

You should know that mods don't give a fuck about the rules

I already completed all the challenges, win online 1st all the time and I'm still in the 5000s
There's nothing skill based about this shitty event.

>Callie
Who?

I had a job interview that went poorly but at least I now have more time to get into the top 5%

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You need to be in top 5k
So in other words, you need to be a the shittiest faggot not to be in 5000 top

>Over-invested waifufag
Ami, Liz and Megumi fans are literally no different.

and I'm still falling

youtu.be/B7yg1eAb6pc

You guys need to make sure you start the third lap in 8th. Wait for everyone to pass.

Less typing more fapping user, those bandiho's aren't gonna take your semen alone.

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I was waiting for Mex, Mex, did you get it?

Ha ha ha, right. Good one that I'm not shittier faggot, ha ha ha...

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>GP has been out for 2 days
>just about everyone is halfway done

Safe to say that as long as you do the daily and quick challenges every day, everyone should easily get the Tawna skin.

>Be in the top 0.3% for Nitro
>Top 1% for championship
It's insane how quickly you can do it with just one or two days off.

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isabella is literally just hotter tawna and you cant change my mind

Okay yeah, I didn't get it either. What gives?

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Nobody cares about that, everyone wants the 5% kart but only cheaters and no life neets will get it because they keep grinding 24/7

Huh....

Is it because it's private?

I want to complete Mashed Potato change on Crash Cove.
2 more to go. Got my first hate mail in CTR because of that.

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I'll try this time (guy)

Does anybody know how to get the last lap to first place challenge? How in the fuck do you do that in a actual game?

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It's possible, but the challenge doesn't specify online matchmaking. Has anyone else in this thread gotten the Last to First challenge in a friends lobby?

Go for it.

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We're trying to figure it out in a lobby.

Fucking drop dead cunt.

by cheating, like everyone else did

You need go be in top 5000 (and number still growing). There's nothing "tryhard" in it.
I'm in top 500 and I've been playing only 12 hours

I think you're projecting grievances for video game chicks way too much dude. Take a break from the internet for a while.

Kill yourself faggot.

Cheese it with friends or just get insanely lucky. You can also disconnect so you get AI instead of real players

Pick Coco Park. Set 7 laps and easy AI. Go full speed on first 6 laps. On 7 lap go reverse. If you get hit or even slightly stop going reverse, it won't count.

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Explain how without getting booted from the match for no opponents.

love you user

how quick is this game gonna go on sale? want a couch co op game for the switch but pretty broke rn, plus theres no point in getting it until next semester starts.

I'm in top 3% for nitro currently but maybe 11% for championship. I just don't have the time to grind grind grind grind grind FUCK just increase the FUCKING coins

FUCK YOU TROPY

Guy here
It doesn't work in a private lobby. The dream is dead.

Remember when they made a worse collection of Mini-games than Bash?

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I'm just gonna have to find a lobby full of children online.

>get fifth place within six seconds of first place onlkine
fucking faggots

Look at those snouts!

ok, one last thing. Do you think it's because I didn't finish the race, maybe? did that counter it???

Fuck us sideways, I guess we're just gonna have to git gud or pray we get a game where all the other players drop. Thanks for the nitro, you guys.

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I just don't get it, people complained about the grinding but they made it worse? Are they just listening to the wrong people or do they actually hate us?

Nah, I don't think it matters
Just gotta get lucky now

Yeah it is really grindy and it's really not convenient for everyone. Good thing you only need to be in Top 5% for one of them to get the cart if that's what you're after.

Oh fuck me, it DOES say Online Matchmaking. We were screwed from the beginning.

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I just got Update 1.05 on ps4. Any idea what it's for?

On Switch in handheld do a normal online race. Halfway through the first lap or whenever during the race turn on airplane mode for a second or two and then turn it back off. All players will be replaced with easy AI and it will still count as an online race. I'm not sure how you would do this on PS4. Maybe just turn your wifi off for a second.

The switch servers are not working!!!

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Yeah they are

Is megumi only for certain regions or something? She appeared today for me when I checked and she came with in a bundle like ami but I dont see anyone playing her online. which is fine by me because I get to keep her all to myself

*reverses, coming to a screeching halt*

What the fuck did you just say? What the fuck did you just say to me? No, fuck-- no fuck you. What the FUCK did you just say to me you turning little bitch whore bitch? I will fuck you, I will actually fuck you on the street you disgusting blonde bimbo bitch, do not even think about-- don't look at my kart, don't look at my fucking kart when I'm talking to you, fuck you, I'll see you on the track you cunt, you stupid bimbo cunt bitch god I hate you, what the FUCK did you just say? DON'T WALK AWAY

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Can't find a fucking online match.

I disconnect my lab cable for a second.

Why are these the best posts in these threads

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Maybe on ps4 setting the mtu to 750 would lag everyone else out, like for getting GTAV solo public lobbies? CTR does have p2p servers right?

Could be your region

>made top 100 on Switch
ayy, this might be easier than I thought

BASED what the fuck did you just say? poster

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>top three every race are trophy girls
>1st place finishes a lap before anyone else

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Finally found one after 1 hour.

Every game I play online I start out in first for a lap or so then I get hit once and end in like 5th-8th

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Well you're competing against a lot of Mario Kart fans that may have difficulties with some of the basic challenges.

>if you get hit
So that is why it fucked for me

Perhaps, though i'm just honestly sick of seeing characters I love get trashed for reasons that make no sense or are just flat-out wrong (Mainly the latter).

>He doesn't start in 8th so he can get a free mask and wreck shit back into 1st place

user, nothing is worse than MK64 rubberbanding.

She reminds me of lifeline from apex legends. She needed to be fully Japanese or gotten a thicker accent

>getting mad over people making fun of a fictional character

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Its balance.You guys act like this doesn't happen in any other kart racer.Its just more punishing in ctr.

wtf does squash 3 times in crash cove mean

>the game still isn't registering my Nitro Court wins for limit battle
I'M NOT GETTING HIT, what else does the game want? I've done it with bots, I've done it with players, I've even done it online. What the fuck is happening?

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>Start Your Engine - Perform 25 perfect boosts at the start of a race
How do I do this?
I always have the boost at the start, so why is it stuck at 0/25?

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mash X

How so? do I just go in full mario party mode and spam it or just long enough to get the black smoke?

press X and hold it,
it will go WHEEW WHEEEEEW WHEEEEEW and you will see the meter actually filling up properly isntead of 60%

Imagine if they went Kaori from SSX levels.

I can hear her say this

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>“Megumi” speaks french
Why?

Turbo squast it does happen.Use the item that allows you to hit a turbo and land in top of the opponents.It'll crush them.It happen to me once and is extremely hard

I keep getting asked about a survey asking if i'm having fun. Anyone else?

Why does Megumi sound like a grandma? She should sound all young and genki.

Paris Syndrome

Why does the game keep removing my fucking decal?

Well? Are you having fun?

They are now.It weren't working before but now they are.

Hell yeah

Anyone have a screenshot of the pit stop for today?

>Coco is evolving to match her Bandicoot peers in stature
>it goes horribly wrong

Okay I got it now, thanks

>realize nobody boost starts so they get better crate items
>copy them
>still not boost starting or going hard and am still in first place for the first set of crates

People are literally not even driving for the first 3-5 seconds of the race just to make sure they get a decent item. It's pretty fucking stupid

>Magumi's extended air stunt
Guys I'm in love

It looks like raphael is in the back on the right

How exactly do you get further up on the championship leaderboard? Just winning games?

This
Fuck off Stew. Apologize to mommy right this instant.

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PLEASE FUCKING HELP ME MASTER USF BOOSTING, I CANT FUCKING MAINTAIN IT, I AM NOT HITTING WALLS OR FAILING DRIFTS WHY DOES IT GRADUALLY DISSAPEAR?

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You need the following conditions:

>Autism
>NEET
>Cheater

it keeps getting worse
youtube.com/watch?v=B7yg1eAb6pc

Back in the Race is fucking impossible. Why does the last guy I'm waiting on have to be 1 minute away from 7th who's already 1 minute away from 1st?

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Reserves user. You need 'perfect' powerslides.

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Land perfects or perish

You sound a bit salty there, git gud.

Disconnect and then reconnect at the start of the race and just play against AI.

>git gud at grinding virtual points non-stop 24/7
I'd rather git gud at the game

Welp, time to grind some Wumpa.

>sneed the tawna
get fucked

Doble tap a trigger.

Show the class

I played yesterday for like 5 hours and I'm still in top 5%. Try winning some races for once, git gud.

I win all the races online and completed all the challenges yet I'm still 7000 something.
What do you suggest I git gud at then?

Who is the artist? This is like the 2nd of 3rd pic of this style I've seen today.

this looks like you could get yourself banned doing it

I'm not sure how to do that on ps4 with wifi

How the fuck do you not get nuked at the first set of items every race?

Except Lifeline is a hideous mongrel that is unironically less attractive than cartoon animal women. Commit sudoku for even mentioning that shitty game.

I try but damn these items.

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Turn off your router?

I'm too stupid to into webms. Just pick Electron Avenue and see for yourself.

I did it wired but you could try a connection test.

Stay behind

Bullshit.
I haven't even completed all challenges and i'm in the top 1%. You're talking absolute shit.

>It's an autistic Tawnafag DNFing the bottom half and discouraging the entire lobby from playing because theres no chance at winning episode

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user, try this

get hit. I'm not joking, for some odd reason, when I was doing that challenge, it went up when I got hit multiple times

Check the championship leaderboard

I would but I am not at home and I don't have her.

Based

also if it matters I did it with bots, in arcade

I like his style but Coco isn't a complete washboard and he seems intent on drawing her that way

You Must have ALL items enabled. I did it in 2p battle just fine on lives with no timer