"user, as a member of the opposite sex, I sense no charm from you. Your generic speech pattern...

>9 hours later
>You're still not finished?
>Futaba: Nope. Not even half way there. Now! Speed up.
Futa Futaba is kind of funny so I'd play along for a while.

"You are not wrong, my beloved Futaba. But, you too is also a NPC. I am the only player controlled character in this game."

Then Futaba achieves chim and becomes a god capable of living the 2D dimension and being together with me forever!

haha yeah, imagine if it Futaba was ACTUALLY a futa lol haha

Smile. Like, really big smile.

Slowly open mouth, making a noise of pain or fear that slowly rises in volume.

Scream incoherently and start spinning in place.

This signals the four friends, clad in samson like attire from Cho Aniki, to barge into the room, lit roman candles taped to the underside of their groins.

Commence fiery bukkake, shooting at everything in her room and screaming all the while.

After all shots are fired (with screaming and pelvic thrusting, no less), all of us present adopt a solemn line up. I clear my throat.

Then we sing, to the tune of "Rudolph the Red-nosed reindeer"...

"Stimpy the still born stunt man,
very early met his dooooom,
the umbilical cord got tangled,
around his neck in the womb."

"His parents were unhappy,
life for them was unfair,
his father had just broken his spine,
doing motor stunts in midair!"

"Then his mom got a great idea,
on that tragic daaaaaaay..."

"Why not have him do the stunts instead?
You can't kill what's already dead!"

"Then how the sponsors loved him,
and they did a happy dance,
because Stimpy the Stillborn Stuntman,
didn't need health insuraaaaance!"

The group steps to the side to allow a final member dressed as Featherman Yaiba to aim and fire a potato launcher loaded with an fireworks-laded aborted fetus into Futaba's computer. As the cornupica of blackcats, m-80s, sparklers, and other assorted flammables go off, we make our escape.

We never contact Futaba again, leaving her and her therapist to try and figure out why, why oh why this sort of thing happened.

It's in her name, man.

She's right tbqh. I go to work, I come back home, I spend the rest of the day shitposting on Yea Forums. I'm like the hollow from Dark Souls, an empty husk of a person that was supposed to be filled with personality, but it never came.
Same goes for the rest of you faggots.

Vomit. She probably smells like shit.

But you're soooooo smart for realizing this yourself, right? Because no one ever thinks about it, right? You're totally special

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mad

lol don't get flank flustered

Have you heard of the high elves?

Welcome to Coneria!

Basically.

I mean, realistically if she was an absolute shut-in she'd probably have terrible to non-existent hygiene. Shit socks and snapple bottles filled with piss etc.

Not really, I bath every day and I don't go anywhere if I don't have college

Why. Why though.

Same, if it's not work or errands I tend to stay at home, but i still shower, apply deodorant and brush and floss my teeth daily.

I don't need your approval, you disgusting NEET hee-hoe. I only date cool guys like Jack Frost.

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obsessed

>copy paste on google
>nothing

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>You seem like some cunt who'll enjoy being shitted on your open mouth mate, maybe even a kick to the jowls

this is the correct answer

"You can open the menu with START.
Don't forget to save your progress."

god I want to give her a baby

Based

She has no idea what she's talking about due to being locked inside a shack for the past 15 years of her life.
Tell her she stinks and to fuck off.

Enter her personal space. She will not be able to handle it.

Who asked you, bitch?

Gigachad does not belittle others, nice try though.

>kek

Bully her.

instant mating press

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ORANGE HAIR BAD

mishima didn't deserve that

Barf because of her smelly vagina! Yuck!

I chose "He's the protagonist", because that's how those Japanese protagonist tend to be. Characters like Mishima are how Atlus views their audience, not the Gary Stu self-inserts.

>if I don't have college
so you're not a shut-in